Addicts

Disclaimer: I do not, in anyway, own YGO or any of the songs used in this fic. All lyrics are thanks to Yes, this is a song fic. Each chapter is a different song to lay out the story. I thought it would be fun, so just give it a chance.

Note: This fic is a sequel to a fic I will be writing after this. I have the basic plot idea, but I thought I would do the sequel first, just because.

Chapter 01

I'm Not and Addict

Seto had just returned home from a rather ugly date. He stepped into his silent home, getting out of the freezing rain. He folded up his umbrella and tossed it into a can by the door, which held other brightly colored umbrellas. He removed his wet coat from his body. He cringed a little from the feeling of having to peel it off him as though he was an orange. He was too distracted by his thoughts to properly put the coat away. He tossed it by the umbrella can, and walked towards his bedroom.

Thoughts of his date with Jou were clouding his mind. The two went out to dinner, only to make a public scene. Seto was used to the old Jou yelling at him, but he wasn't used to the puppy screaming at him with nothing but anger and worry in his heart. It made Seto cringe just thinking about it.

Jou had every right to yell at him, though.

It was the fifth fight over the same nonsense.

'Breathe it in and breathe it out'

Seto placed a freshly rolled joint between his dry, cracked lips. He ignited a lighter, watched the tiny flame dance provocatively at him for a few seconds, then lit up. He inhaled sharply and held it in; counting each second in which he allowed the harsh smoke soak into his lungs. He exhaled as a small tear snuck down his face.

Not even an hour ago, he fought with Jou over drug use. Jou screamed such awful things at him, and punched him in the face. The sting of that punch was still there, but not for long. Jou begged, pleaded, demanded even that Seto quit any and every drug he began to use in the last two months.

He knew that he really should quit his drug uses, but it was difficult. He didn't want to, but at the very same time he did. He wanted to give it up just for Jou. He felt a couple more tears fall down his face as he took another drag of his joint. He continued to smoke, watching it burn closer and closer to his fingertips with each hit.

"Are you crying?" Came a sinister voice which both excited and unsettled the brunette.

'And pass it on, it's almost out'

Seto handed the joint over to Bakura, which he gladly accepted. "No," came Seto's reply as he watched Bakura take a hit. He wiped his face and smiled to the psychotic man.

"So, just trying to get a cheap high?" Bakura asked.

"Say what you will, but a simple weed high is pretty nice. You should enjoy it sometimes," Seto said in an uplifted tone.

"Yeah, I did that. Two years ago," Bakura scoffed in reply. "I'm not into cheap thrills anymore. I'm classy now," he said with a daring smirk as he tossed something to Seto.

Seto watched the object land into his lap. "Again?" He asked as he picked up the syringe.

"Not this very second. Let's smoke a little more first," Bakura said as he came and sat down on the bed next to Seto. He pulled out a small baggie from his pocket and handed it to the brunette. "It's not shake," he informed as he dug into another of his pockets to pull out a pipe, "so you'll have to load a bowl.

Seto looked down at the bag of marijuana and sighed.

'We're so creative, so much more'

Seto's previous mindset had soon vanished. He sat on the ground with Bakura, their backs up against the bed. Seto looked to Bakura and smiled at him.

'We're high above but on the floor'

"So how does your boyfriend feel about all of this?" Bakura asked after ten minutes of silence.

Seto was silent for a while. He didn't want these thoughts of grief to return to him while he felt so good. "He… Yelled at me about it at a restaurant," he finally replied.

"Why?" Inquired the nosy boy.

"It's not socially acceptable. Drugs are seen as a bad thing here, Bakura. To the point in which they are illegal."

Bakura scoffed. "I know they're illegal."

"But you don't understand how other people react to someone they care about doing drugs," Seto told him with a sadness in his eyes.

"Tch. Don't let other people tell you what you should or shouldn't do. It's your body. How do you feel when you do them?"

Seto sat in silence, thinking about the question.

'It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive'

"Good… I feel good," Seto said as a smile graced his face. He looked to Bakura, who seemed to be like his silver angel… Or his shining devil.

"Then that's all you need to worry about; feeling good. Fuck all those idiots who want to take that precious feeling away from you," Bakura said in a delicate tone. "They do it because they don't know how to find their own way to feel good... So they want to take it away from you."

Seto blinked a couple times. He didn't want people to take away this feeling. Without it, he felt empty.

'If you don't have it you're on the other side'

Seto was out in the kitchen, gathering a few snacks for his and Bakura's rumbling tummies. He closed the cabinet and started to walk back to the bedroom with cradled arms filled with munchies. He walked into the room and dropped them down onto the bed. "There," he said as he stood triumphantly.

Bakura looked through the loot and chose what he wanted to eat. "Don't stand there so proud. All you did was get food."

Seto frowned. "Oh come on! You know how unmotivated you are to do anything when you've been smoking."

"Lightweight," snickered Bakura.

"Fuck you," replied the brunette as he grabbed a pastry treat and shoved it in his mouth.

"I keep telling you, Kaiba… I don't fuck men who are involved. Loose the tight little virgin dumb ass, then we'll talk."

Seto glared at the other boy. "Dick."

Bakura waggled a finger back and forth while saying, "ah, ah, ah… If you want to become classier like me, you should watch your tongue." Bakura chuckled and held up one of the two syringes.

"Oh yeah, that's real classy, Bakura," Seto said with a smirk.

'The deeper you stick it in your vein'

As Seto pushed down on the plunger of the syringe, he thought of Jou. The blonde's smiling face flashed into his mind. Seto shook his head and continued to push down on the plunger.

'The deeper the thoughts, there's no more pain'

Seto and Bakura laid next to each other on the bed. They stared up at the ceiling while talking about any thoughts they had. This proved for interesting conversation for the two of them, but anyone sober listening in would have no idea what was going on.

"Are you still worried about what your boy thinks?" Bakura asked.

Seto thought for a few minutes.

'I'm in heaven, I'm a god'

"No."

'I'm everywhere, I feel so high'

Seto and Bakura both began to laugh. Over what they weren't sure of. Whatever it was, it was funny. Seto wanted to remember the way he felt this very second forever. He didn't want it to end, and he didn't want Bakura to go away.

'It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive

If you don't have it you're on the other side

I'm not an addict'

He couldn't wait until he would be able to spend this kind of time with Bakura again.

'Maybe that's a lie…'

Seto laid alone after Bakura left.

'It's over now, I'm cold, alone'

He was curled into the fetal position, shivering and crying. He had pulled many blankets up over his body, but still he felt absolutely freezing.

'I'm just a person on my own'

He whished to be in the embrace of his dearest Katsuya. He missed the blonde. He missed the smell of his green apple shampoo, the look his unkempt, filthy fingernails… Everything.

Over time, Seto began to calm down, and think less of his puppy. It felt as though his mind was a blank piece of paper. Nothingness began to take him over.

'Nothing means a thing to me'

Seto wanted to sleep, but he knew that he wouldn't be able to for a while. He still needed time to calm himself down. He sat up, his blankets slipping down to his waist as he did. He looked over to his nightstand and opened the tiny drawer. He pulled out a joint and lighter. He lit it up, and laid back down watching the ceiling as he smoked.

'It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive

If you don't have it you're on the other side

I'm not an addict

Maybe that's a lie'

Smoke swirled and danced around Seto's face. He stared up with blank eyes, seeming to be staring off into space. He felt like there was nothing inside of him. No lungs breathing air, no heart pumping blood, just nothing. If he were to shoot himself through the head this very second, he would feel no pain… No remorse.

Nothing mattered to him now. Not even his never admitted love of his live, Jounouchi. He didn't give a damn about anything in his world. He may as well be sleeping outside on the ground, surrounded by nothing but hard cold concrete and he wouldn't lay a single thought on missing his warm and comfortable bed.

Fuck it all.

'Free me, leave me'

The ringing of a phone entered Seto's ears. He turned his head to the side and looked at the phone on his nightstand. He picked it up and sat up, looking down at the caller I.D. It was Jounouchi. He sat there and counted how many rings were echoing in his head, debating if he should answer or not.

After the fifth ring, he put out his joint then pressed the connect button and held the phone to his ear. "Hello?" He asked dryly.

"Kaiba?" He heard on the other end.

"Yes," he answered, lying back down. He stared back up at his ceiling with expressionless eyes.

"I-I'm sorry about tonight. I… I shouldn't have yelled at you like that… And in public, no less," Jou said with a sad sounding voice. Seto could almost swear the boy was crying, or that he was earlier.

"I don't really care," came Seto's dull response. "You did what you did. I can't change the past, and you can't take back what you said. What's done is done, c'est la vie, and many other generic phrases," Seto said blandly.

"Are you mad at me?" Jou asked nervously.

"No, I'm not mad. I have no reason to be so. I'm just… Tired," he lied. "Why don't you come over tomorrow, and we can clear our minds and get over these petty arguments we keep having. We can just relax…"

"That sounds really nice, Kaiba," Jou replied in a more bright tone. "I'll come over around three."

"See you then." Seto hung up the phone and placed it back down on the nightstand. He should have felt excited to see his puppy, but he didn't. At the moment, he couldn't care less.

'Watch me as I'm going down'

He would give anything for the excitement he once had. He missed the jittery feeling he would get when he would see Jou. He was sometimes tempted to go out and swallow some butterflies just to see he could get the feeling of the phrase 'butterflies in the stomach' back.

'Free me, see me'

Sometimes he worried that nothing could bring him back to the way he used to feel. It was as if he was loosing his entire grip on reality. He stopped to wonder if Bakura ever felt like this before. He must have just gotten used to it…

His mind flashed back to the first time Bakura got him to join in with the activities. Bakura had always tried to convince him, but Seto firmly believed he would never need drugs in any situation. He used to be strong. However, since he first laid lips on his first pipe, he became weak.

Look at him now. He flaked off on his duties for work, he got into arguments with his lover all the time, he felt empty, and he had the sneaking suspicion that he was in danger of loosing Jou, forever.

The two had already 'ended' things once. It wasn't over drugs, but over how Seto was treating the pup. It wasn't the happiest thing to happen to Seto, and he didn't want to loose his puppy again.

He felt like he was on the way to loosing everything.

'Look at me, I'm falling and I'm falling'

It was hard to give up on drugs. He loved the way they made him feel, but had always hated when he would come down, or the aftermath of his actions.

Some days he felt he felt like shit. He wanted to stop. He felt like all he wanted to do was stop and get rid of the awful habit. Other days he felt that it was perfectly fine for him to take part in it, as if it was a hobby just like many other things, so it should be fine with other people.

'It is not a habit, it is cool I feel alive I feel

It is not a habit, it is cool I feel alive'

He didn't know what to do.

He felt like he had little shoulder angels telling him what he should do.

'It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive

If you don't have it you're on the other side'

"I should just stop," he told himself.

'I'm not an addict'

He thought for a couple minutes and sighed. "This is a conundrum."

'Maybe that's a lie…'

(TBC)

Well, there was the first chapter. Give it a chance. I know it may seem weird, and I'm sure some people out there may hate me for making Seto a druggie. Avoids flying objects. Aww, come on… See what happens in the end.

I'm strangely motivated with this story so the next chapter shouldn't take so long unlike YWN, hehehe… To any of you reading that as well, I'm sorry! I'll get on that next chapter! Hehe.

Anyway, the song used in this chapter was:

I'm Not an Addict by K's Choice

Lyrics thanks to you next chapter!