The NewDer Adventures of Naked Brennan

A/N: This diphthongian delight is a parody tribute, dedicated to GreysIsTheCatsPajamas, who has recently been troubled by a recidivist muse and in a fit of sleep depravity, thrashed a great Crack!Fic out of it, called "The NewD Adventures of Naked Booth" – I recommend that you read it first.

Naked Brennan stretched on her bed.

Naked Brennan was hot.

(Totally hot!)

Naked Brennan reached to pull her blanket off and realised if she did so she would also remove it from a man.

Naked Brennan was okay with that.

(As we all are, right?)

Naked Brennan rolled out of bed.

Naked Brennan raised her hands up above her head.

Naked Brennan stretched and stretched.

(Which was also totally hot!)

Naked Brennan looked down at her bed.

Naked Brennan saw the man smiling in his sleep.

(It was a charming smile too…)

Naked Brennan was glad she was the one to put it there.

(Okay, there was no proof, but pride made conjecture her bitch that morning)

Naked Brennan didn't care that she was Naked.

(This sentence is doubly diphthongian, so we shouldn't care either)

Naked Brennan stepped into the kitchen.

Naked Brennan brewed some coffee.

Naked Brennan spilled a little cream on her chest when she was putting it in the cup.

(If you want to take care of this for Naked Brennan, I'll up the rating)

Naked Brennan poured her coffee, and coffee for her friend.

(Friend, right…we all sleep in the nick with our 'friends'…but I digress)

Naked Brennan brought said coffee down the hallway, still Naked… was Naked Brennan. So, so… so very Naked.

(…and did I mention still totally hot?)

Naked Brennan woke up the man in her bed, tugging on the blankets.

(Who wants to be the understudy for this role? If you review this, you're in the running...)

"You brought me coffee, Naked Brennan," the man whispered.

(I'm not sure why he's whispering…maybe it's a sleep deprivation thing)

"That's right, Booth… I am Naked."

(Which could be an analogy for bare Bones when you think about it…okay, okay, don't strain your metaphorical brains over it…it's just a musing)

"I am Naked with you."

(Hurray! Screams the shipper fandom & Thank you Captain Obvious)

"That's the way it should always be, Naked Brennan."

(Cue: moving Bones to Showtime…and just forget about how darn cold those D.C. winters can get)

"Let's do Naked things."

"Why not, we're already Naked… don't spill the coffee though, that would burn our Naked bodies."

"Sure would" (Thanks again, Captain Naked Obvious!)

(The coffee cups in Naked Brennan's house don't carry warnings…but she's a genius, even when she's Naked, right?)

Naked Brennan put down the coffee. Naked Brennan climbed into the bed… and Naked Brennan did Naked things with Naked Booth – starting with the little bit of cream on her chest (just to tie up the loose end in the plot).

(What plot? I hear you ask…)

(THE END… or is it? Could it be a cliff-hanger? IDK…)