2 months since Pete's death.
Rick is glaring at an equally defiant and irritated Carl. The atmosphere is thick. Both looking at each other as if ready to kill the other. Judith lets out a giggle as the front door opens and Michonne steps over the threshold. She smiles and walks over to the drooling toddler sitting on the sofa behind her father with arms outstretched. She stops in her tracks. Realizing that she may have walked in on something and is about to apologize.
"You can't do this!" Carl yells, not caring that they were not alone anymore. Tears forming, yet not resolving his stance. "You can't do this!" He demanded. "You can't!" Carl straightens his back and tries desperately to will his tears away.
Rick utterly crestfallen, takes in a deep breath and softens his stance. He waits a few seconds collecting his thoughts then replies firmly "It isn't up to you. You are my kid. And this is how it's gonna be"
Carl is the first to acknowledge Michonne, breaking eye contact momentarily before regaining his death stare towards his father. "Have you even thought of what others in our group will think?! What I think?! What I feel?!" He takes a few steps back, disgust washing over him. "Have you even told Michonne?" Carl says low with sadness as tears flow freely now.
Michonne cannot take anymore and rushes to Carl. Wrapping her arms around him from behind while he faces his father. "Stop" She says softly while pulling Carl backward away from Rick. "Stop!" she says forcefully as Rick tries to walk over to his son. Carl's body is over come with emotion, as he crumbles into Michonnes embrace. She tries to usher the teenager to a seat but he refuses. He turns to face Michonne and hugs her.
He pulls back and looks her in the eyes. "I love you Mich. I love you like you were my mother. My best friend." Carl's voice breaks slightly. He hugs her once more, then says softly "I just...love you." She nods as he pulls away from her. He turns and slowly walks towards the staircase. Defeat written all over him.
Michonne's eyes are burning. She tries desperately to fight the tears and anger bubbling up within her. She waits till she can hear the faint sound of Carl's bedroom door shut. She walks over and picks Judith up. She kisses the toddlers head, and sits down while Judith eagerly tries to plant wet kisses on her cheek. When Rick finally looks at her, she motions to him to sit. Rick falls onto the single sofa and lets out a loud sigh. Michonne studies him to try and gleen as much as she can from his body language. "So, that was intense" Michonne says dryly.
Rick is at a loss for words, he tries to think of something to say back but only manages a nod.
Michonne stands with Judith and says "Don't go anywhere. I'm going to go and drop Judith off with Maggie. This environment isn't good for her". Rick nods and watches her leave.
Michonne is gone for about 5 minutes. When she returns, Rick is no longer sitting in the lounge. Frustrated she decides to check on Carl. Walking past the kitchen she notices a cup of hot tea, a streaming bowl of oatmeal and Rick seated opposite the meal. She walks in suspiciously. Wondering why Rick is avoiding eye contact. She sits and takes a sip of the chamomile tea. "So." She says tiredly. "And before you think of giving me the long story, please keep in mind that I have just finished my shift. All I want, is to fix this...whatever this is, and to have a shower and sleep. Oh, and thank you for breakfast" She smiles and Rick can't help but meet her eyes and smiles weakly at her. While she eats, she waits patiently for Rick to say something. Anything. By the end of the meal. Rick still hasn't said a word. So Michonne suggests, "Should I talk to Carl about this?"
Rick panics as Michonne stands and he grabs her arm, making her sit back down. He looks at her bowl, then to her eyes and says "I've asked Jessie to move in. Carl isn't dealing well with it" Rick is searching her face for any emotion, but finds none.
Michonnes heart sinks to the pit of her stomach, but she is careful not to give anything away. She quickly arranges her thoughts and quickly responds. "Oh, is that all? I'll talk to him after he's cooled down." She lets out a soft chuckle and looks him in the eye. "And congratulations. Don't worry, Carl will come around" There was a long pause, Rick desperately trying to get a read on her and failing. She smiles brightly at him and says cheerfully "You had better get to work Constable, you're going to be late. Four days in a row, if I can recall. Oh, and before I forget. There are a few panels on the west end of the wall that need looking at."
Rick smiles and stands, a little taken aback by her nonchalant attitude. He walks to the front door as Michonne follows behind. Rick turns to face her and says "Thank you. For everything you do..." he places a hand on her shoulder and squeezes gently and says in an almost whisper "Thank you" while maintaining eye contact a little longer than needed. He walks over the threshold and Michonne closes the door behind him.
She walks over to the dinning table and picks up her dishes. Her resolve and guard leaving her. She beings washing the dishes, choking back on tears. She turns off the water and decides to do it later. Leaning against the sink and tears streaming down her face, she whispers to herself "Pull yourself together... You don't love him... You can't."
As Rick walked down the steps of his house, he couldn't help but feel the need to go back in and check on Michonne. He stood there for almost 8 minutes contemplating what he should or shouldn't do when Glenn walks up to him.
"Hey, the west end of... You ok?" Glenn says, breaking Rick out of his thoughts while averting his eyes from Glenn.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking about how we are going to fix the paneling on the west end of the wall."
Glenn's eye brows shot up questioningly. "Uh, you sure that's what you were thinking about?"
Rick looks at him and smiles. "Yeah. It was. Lets get going" With that Glenn and Rick walk off talking about how they were going to about fortifying the massive iron wall paneling.
Michonne walks up the stairs and heads straight for the bathroom. She washes her face and grabs a face cloth. She lets the cold water run over her hands and the cloth. She stares at herself in the mirror momentarily before wringing out the cloth and mumbling to herself, "Pathetic". She presses the cold cloth over her red swollen eyes. She feels ridiculous for allowing herself to fall in love with Rick. Now she was crying over a man, who would never love her the way she wanted. She looks at herself in the mirror and whispers angrily "You're an idiot..." She takes a deep breath then starts to walk down the corridor. Carl's bedroom is adjacent to hers so she decides to check in on Carl first before packing.
Carl is sitting on his bed. Still aggravated. Still upset. He hears a knock at the door and lets out a weak response "Come in". Hoping, wishing, praying that it was anybody else other than his father. Upon seeing Michonne's red eyes, he jumps out of bed and rushes over to hug her. She's hugging him back as fresh tears start to well in both their eyes. They hold each other for what seems to be eternity before Carl says in a broken voice. "Please don't leave...Please" every word is drenched in desperation as he clung on to her. "Please" he said once more hoping that, that would the 'please' that would change everything.
Michonne breaks their hug and says "You know I can't stay kiddo" tears still streaming down his face he nods sadly, knowing that if she stays, it might just be the end of her. "I know. I'm sorry. I know you love him...and us." He says looking away from her.
She grabs his face and smiles through her tears. "No. Don't be. Your dad doesn't need me anymore. He made his decision". Michonne places a soft kiss his forehead. "I'll be at Maggie and Glenn's until Jessie moves into here with her boys. It'll be a squeeze, but we'll make it work. And when they've moved all their stuff out of their house I will talk to Deanna to see if i can move into Jessie's home."
Carl listens and knows it's for the best. "Sounds good" is all Carl can manage with a sad smile. A few more seconds go by before Carl insists. "Let me know when you've packed your things. I want to help you move."
"Sure thing kiddo." With that she pats him on the shoulder and opens the door adjacent to his and walks into her room.
Carl stands there thinking that this had to be one of the worst days of his life. Today he would say good bye to his second mother. He knew that if they were not living in the same house they would never see each other. Michonne's schedule was hectic. She was the only other constable. So that meant she was on call 24/7. She was never off duty; and try as hard as he might to push those kinds of thoughts out of his head, they plagued him. Coming back stronger. Pushing him to the edge of depression.
Thirty minutes have passed and Michonne appears from her room carrying two duffel bags. She knocks on Carl's door. There is no answer. So she walks down the corridor and down the stairs. There she notices Carl standing at the front door patiently waiting. Hearing her foots steps on the hard wooden floors Carl turns to face her. He smiles and walks over to her while extending his hand to offer to carry a bag. She looks at him and says "It'll all work out" not believing a word she uttered.
He looks at her and replies "No. No, it wont." Taking in a deep breath he asks, "Mich, may I ask you a question?"
She smiles and replies "Yes. Of course, what is it?"
Carl looks around the room, uncertain as to how to ask said question. The thinks for a few seconds and then decides on being blunt and straight forward as the best option. "I know you love us. I feel it. And it helps that you say it to us. I know you have feelings for my father. And he has feelings for you."
Michonne scoffs and looks at him as if he has lost his mind. "Uh, where's the question? Those were all statements. Misguided statements nevertheless."
Carl clears his throat and starts again "You are so open with your love for me and Judith. Why can't you show my dad how you feel about him? Tell him..."
Michonne looks at the floor trying to think of something to change the subject. Her mind comes up blank. "Um... Well..."
Carl sees how uncomfortable he has made her and quickly tries to changes the subject. "Forget it. It was a stupid question." He turns to walk towards the door when Michonne grabs his arm.
With sadness in her eyes she replies. "Because, it's clear that even if your father knew how much I loved him...how much I love you and Judith. He would choose Jesse over me. Isn't that much clear to you?"
Carl didn't want to push it any further cause it was clear Michonne was hurting as much as he was. He nods, just wanting the conversation to be over. She manages a small smile and asks "Shall we get going? I still have to ask Glenn and Maggie if I can move in...so here's hoping they let me stay."