Once upon a time there was a boy named Sampunzel who had the most marvelous tresses in all the land. As an infant he was snatched away from his parents by the evil witch Rowena. For the witch it was payback for Sampunzel's father stealing rampion from her garden to feed his wife's cravings while pregnant with Sampunzel.

Rowena raised the baby as her own and hoped someday when Sampunzel was old enough her son Fergus would marry the attractive boy.

As a youth Sampunzel was locked away in a tower and there he stayed for four long years with only the birds and squirrels as his companions. In that time Sampunzel's hair grew very long and more beautiful by the day. It was his crowning glory.

Alfie, his very favorite squirrel helped groom the silky locks for Sampunzel or as Alfie called him, Sam.

The day was fair and once again Sam sat at the tower window waiting for someone to pass by and save him. He hoped for a prince but at this point any man would do even a rascally ruffian. As long as his savoir was young and handsome with good teeth, Sam could overlook other things like title and money.

Alfie did a jig on the windowsill wearing a walnut for a hat. Sam giggled as the squirrel clickity clacked around with his tiny tap shoes.

"Oh Alfie, you are truly my only friend."

Alfie took a knee and did some jazz hands. "Yup I sure am. You know Sam, Rowena's son Fergus will be coming sometime soon to make you his bride. Then what will we do?"

Sam busied himself braiding a long piece of hair. "I don't know…what does it mean to be a bride?"

Alfie dropped his little walnut hat and sat glumly on the ledge. "I think you have to have personal relations on your wedding night and give him babies. I've seen Fergus up close; he's not your type at all."

"Whew, well I dodged that bullet at least. I can't have babies!"

"Sam it's a fairytale, anything goes."

"Crap…I forgot."

Sam suddenly burst into song.

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep…

Alfie pressed his little paws over Sam's lips and chattered at him. "No, no, no! No Disney songs. Besides, save your singing voice for your wedding day and maybe Fergus will run away after hearing it."

Sam huffed, "I have a lovely singing voice!"

They agreed to disagree and spent the day watching for strange men to pass by, hopefully one with a ladder.

…..

Castiel the tone deaf Prince was working in his vegetable garden tending his prize plants. Every year he entered his produce in the village fair under the assumed name "Aloysius Apricot" and had won many ribbons for his zucchini, cucumbers, summer squash and eggplants.

His disappointed mother Queen Naomi shook her head sadly as Cas made out with an eggplant. "My poor son, he really needs a bride."

Gabriel her faithful manservant watched with amusement as Cas looked around then smuggled the large purple veggie into his trousers and scampered away. "I think a female bride is out of the question."

Naomi poked a long nail in the Gabe's shoulder, "Well find him a quest. There must be a pretty male locked in a tower or a dungeon somewhere that needs saving! Then he will marry the poor creature and give me some grandbabies!"

…

Dean Winchester was a known rascal around the kingdom. He loved ale and intercourse, not necessarily in that order. Dean was very handsome, single and free. He enjoyed the pleasures of women and men but lately it was male booty that held his interest.

Sitting at the bar of his favorite tavern the Raging Queen, Dean overheard two men talking about a beautiful boy trapped in a tower by an evil witch. Curious and always up for adventure Dean joined in the conversation.

The old man with the milky eye named "Milky" told Dean all he knew. "Aye lad, there is a beauty trapped in this tower by witch Rowena. It's said that his voice is the worst sort of caterwauling but his visage is that of an angel, a real stunner."

Dean was getting a twitch in his trousers now, "Sounds like fun. If I rescue him is there a reward?"

"Nay, but he would be obligated to give you his hand in marriage."

"I'm sorry I was staring at your creepy eye…what was that?"

The old man growled, "I said the boy would be obligated to marry you if you actually managed to rescue him but be warned, the evil witch Rowena is the one holding him captive."

The other man with the stump named Stumpy poked Dean with this wooden leg, "It said this boy has the fairest tresses in all the land."

Dean wiggled his eyebrows at Milky and Stumpy. It's not his hair I'm after."

….

Naomi stood over her son as he slept. Morning sunbeams cast a pretty glow over his sweet face. She shook his shoulder, "Wake up sleepy head, adventure awaits you."

Cas rolled over clutching his eggplant. His big blue eyes fluttered open and he gave the vegetable a kiss. Naomi gagged just a little.

"Good morning Mommy. Did you say adventure?"

Yes my sweetest baby angel doll, adventure. You are going on a quest to save a pretty boy maiden locked away in a tower."

Cas frowned and pouted, "Sounds dangerous."

"Don't worry; Gabe will go with you as plucky comic relief."

Cas leapt from the comfort of his feather bed with his stiff morning short sword jiggling about. "Excellent, I'll leave a boy and come home a man!"

….

Rowena entered the tower room that held Sam. "Good morning my pretty lad, I have the most wonderful news!"

Sam lay naked on the large featherbed reading an issue of "Heroes Monthly" and ignored the witch. She snatched the magazine away, "I said I have wonderful news. My son Fergus is arriving next week to make you his bride."

Sam wrinkled up his nose, "I heard he's unattractive, no thanks. You may have me locked up but you can't make me marry him."

"Oh you impertinent bitch, you will marry him and be grateful!"

"Nope, I got a good feeling that someone handsome is gonna come along and rescue me."

Rowena kicked aside the end of Sam's long thick braid that lay in a pile next to the bed. "I've had about enough of you and your fantasies of heroes coming to rescue you. Now put on some clothes and show a little decorum."

Sam flashed Rowena his whole fruit basket and the witch stormed out screeching threats.

Alfie crawled out from under a pillow. "She is so scary I left a pile of nuggets. Now what are we going to do Sam?"

Sam peeked under the pillow. "You are going to launder my sheets and I'm going to watch for my hero."

TBC

A/N- Campanula rapunculus, common name rampion bellflower, rapunzel, rampion, or rover bellflower, is a species of bellflower.

This species was once widely grown in Europe for its leaves, which were used like spinach, and its parsnip-like root, which was used like a radish. The Brothers Grimm's tale Rapunzel took its name from this plant.