A/N: Hiya

A/N: Hiya!!!!!! FF.Net is finally back on…YAY!!!! Anyway, here is a sorato songfic maybe a chapter fic later. The song belongs to Cyndi Thomson…it's called "What I Really Meant To Say". And I DO NOT OWN DIGIMON!!

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"A Lover Is Forever" By: *~~Sora Ishida~~*

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Have you ever loved somebody so much that when you lose them, you just feel like you could die? Every thing you ever said to them cuts like a knife through your heart? Well, trust me…if you don't know…you have it easy. I had that happen to me. It wasn't the best thing in the world either. So, basically…you get to learn about this kind of love the easy way. How? Well, I'm going to tell you. It all began…

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My friend Mimi and I were getting ready for this huge dance at our school. My heart was thudding loudly…I was wondering who would ask me to dance…if I was going to get a boyfriend that night. As Mimi brushed on her blush; I was flipping through a magazine. As I turned the page, there was a poster of Yamato "Matt" Ishida. He was my ex-boyfriend and the love of my life…even if we were broken up. As I remembered that horrid night three months ago…I had to force myself to hold back the tears.

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***Flashback***

"No, Matt…I understand clearly. It's your job and being a celebrity it what you want…so go." I said forcing out a smile. He looked at the ground and then to me. I just knew he was going to bring something up.

"What if I wasn't popular…would you still like me?"

"Of- of course."

"Yeah, you're telling the truth. Sora, you're stuttering…and I know that's when you're lying!" He sneered walking away.

"Matt…"

"No, Sora, we're over. I'm sorry."

***END OF FLASHBACK***

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I examined myself in the mirror, and then smiled. I was wearing a light blue, silk, knee-length skirt, a matching sequin tank

, And light blue heels. I had pulled my hair back in a bun with two pieces curving around my face. I turned to face Mimi and smiled.

"So…how do I look?" I asked.

"Like a pop princess from Hell…kidding! You look great." She joked. I laughed and popped her arm playfully.

"Gurl, don't joke like that." I laughed.

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***At The Dance***

I stood against the wall at the dance as everyone else danced the night away and flirted back and fourth. Just then I spotted a blonde boy. Matt. He was with a brown haired girl. I knew her as Sada Simagaski. She smiled and waved to all the people. 'Oh my god, how full of yourself can you be?' I asked myself about Sada. She made a face at me when she walked by. I blushed when Matt just looked at me and smirked.

About five minutes later I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. I gasped and turned around quickly. There were a pair of azure blue eyes staring down at me. I smiled a little.

"Hey, Matt." I said forcing the tears back.

"Hey, Sora." He greeted. There were a couple of minutes of silence and then he said something.

"So, how have you been?"

I smiled and said: "Just fine, thanks." He smiled. "Well, I gotta go. Good luck with those guys." I smiled and nodded as he walked away. 'Damn you, Sora." I thought. I couldn't believe that I hadn't cried and made him feel sorry for me. I still loved him.

 
~ It took me by surprise
When I saw you standing there
Close enough to touch
Breathing the same air
You asked me how I'd been
I guess that's when
I smiled and said just fine
Oh but baby I was lying…~
 
That was nothing like what I meant to say. I meant to say that I wasn't strong enough to live without him, but "Nooooo"! I, Sora, had to blow my last chance with Matt. My heart should have known what to do. I know sometimes I have slow reflexes…why then? Why did it happen then?
 
"Hey, Sora!" Mimi squealed. "Hey."
 
"Guess what?" I looked over to her.
 
"What?" She smiled from ear-to-ear. 
 
"Izzy asked me out…and I said yes…. you think I should've?" I smiled.
 
"Yes, of course." She squealed as Izzy took her hand and led her to the dance floor. I shook my head. "Lucky." I mumbled. I looked over towards the stage. What I saw made me swallow hard. Sada and Matt were like…totally all over each other. As she left to request a song, Matt looked up at me. I turned away quickly and walked off.
 
~ What I really meant to say
Is I'm dying here inside
I miss you more each day
There's not a night
I haven't cried
And baby here's the truth
I'm still in love with you
That's what I really meant to say~
 
It took me awhile to notice that tears were running out of my eyes heavily. I walked quickly down the quiet streets. Yeah, I knew I had to move on. Yeah, I knew he had moved on. And yeah, I knew that we weren't together anymore. He wasn't mine… but it's hard for a young girls heart to figure that out. All the sudden I stopped. I could've stopped us breaking up…I so could've.
 
It was my fault that I had to bring up the subject of him being gone all the time, about girls making guys think they loved them for love, but only did they for they're money & fame. He suspected me after I said that, also. I couldn't believe that I was the reason for my broken heart…he didn't break my heart…I did.
 
I turned to go back to the dance, but somebody was standing there. He smiled. "Took you long enough to turn around." I smiled.
 
"Hi, Matt." I said looking away blushing.
 
"What's wrong?" He asked. I shrugged. "Nothing…I'm okay…really go dance with Sada." I said shyly. He smiled and put a hand on my shoulder. 
 
"You can tell me, okay?" I pulled away from his grasp. "NO, I CAN'T!" I sobbed. He narrowed his eyes at me.
 
"Sora, that is the exact reason that I ended our relationship…you have the worst patience, attitude, and most confusing personality of anyone I know!" He yelled. My heart broke in two.
 
"Sure, excuses…you never even loved me Ishida!" I yelled. Just as I said that fire lit up in his blue eyes. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a ring box. He opened it up and pulled the ring out. Matt threw the box to the side and showed me the ring.
 
"If I didn't love you, why would I have asked you to marry me? I was going to, Sora. I did love you!" He said crying a little. "You don't care though do you? You never did." With that he through the ring in the sewer and walked away. I sat on the bench and cried as he walked away…back into Sada's arms.
 
~ And as you walked away
The echo of my words
Cut just like a knife
Cut so deep it hurt
I held back the tears
Held on to my pride
And watched you go
I wonder if you'll ever know…~
 
~ What I really meant to say
Is I'm dying here inside
I miss you more each day
There's not a night
I haven't cried
And baby here's the truth
I'm still in love with you
That's what I really meant to say…~
 
Matt stopped in his tracks, and then turned around. "Sora?" I looked up at him and wiped away my tears. 
 
"Yeah?" I asked with a little hope in my voice.
 
"Don't tell Sada about this." I bit my lip and nodded.
 
"I won't. You can trust me this time…I promise." I said quietly. He leaned closer and kissed my lips softly. "Bye." I sighed as he dissapered into the school again. I looked up at the stars and then the school.
 
~ What I really meant to say
Is I'm really not that strong
No matter how I try
I'm still holding on
And here's the honest truth
I'm still in love with you~
 
"I'm still in love with you…and I will always be…because a lover is forever." I whispered picking up my coat and walking down the snowy streets back home.
 
~ That's what I really meant to say~
 
 
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A/N: I hope you liked! If you want me to I can make another chapter…and more and more and more…you know. This is one of my favorite songs. I wish my ex would listen to it…ya…Jeramy(My buddy) I still like my ex. Bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!