Captain Dean Howard
Disclaimer: This is satire and parody. This is also fanfiction.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is a Winds of War, Band of Brothers, Pearl Harbor and a general crossover of several World War II based movies, TV programs and some books. I've also put some elements of King of Fighters in this as well.
The main character is basically going to be a World War II hero. If you're a purist this fanfic is not for you. Otherwise check out this fanfic. It's a scream!
Chapter One:
Dean Howard was born in Vermont, January the tenth, 1919. When he was born his scream was loud, deafening the doctor and the nurses who had never heard a louder set of lungs. His father was a traveling businessman and a reserve major in the army. He, his wife and children traveled all over the world. While he did this Dean and his sister had a tutor. But at the same time Dean did not sit still. While he and his parents were in China Dean learned Chinese acrobatics, breakfall and contortion-ism. He also learned how to leap and do other things. He also learned several languages.
As they traveled all over the world Dean learned some unusual skills. In time he learned gung fu(the ability to take a beating), iron skin(the ability to resist killing attacks), tai chi and speed hitting(the ability to hit a target dozens of times in a second. He also learned these fighting styles; he learned American boxing, Thai kick boxing, tae kwon do, wing chun kung fu, wrestling, Brazilian jiu jitsu, street fighting and shaolin kung fu. Over time he merged these styles and ended up fighting his own way.
When he grew up he went to Harvard in an army R.O.T.C. reserve program, graduating at 20 years old. By this time, he was five feet ten inches tall, weighing 180 pounds of much defined muscle. He was a handsome guy with sandy blond hair.
A month after graduating Dean was called to serve. "I'm being sent to Germany to work for the military attache there," Second Lieutenant Dean Howard said while he prepared to get ready.
"Son, that's fine and dandy but don't do anything rash. But I don't think the war will last that long anyway, assuming it starts in the first place," his father, John Howard, said.
"I've put in to join the rangers. The rangers are an elite group of soldiers. I believe the war will start anytime soon and we'll be in it. If I want to have some control over what I'll be doing I have to have my name signed up for the rangers now!" Dean said.
"You can simply get a desk job of some kind. Must you go as far as joining a combat group?" His mother, Mary, asked with concern.
"I'll do all right. I've been doing a lot of running, jumping and training with guns. I'm in the best shape of my life. I've adapted all the training I've gotten, so I'm a tough guy." Howard said.
"I understand you have to do your duty but there's no need to get yourself into a dangerous situation. We're very wealthy now. I did all that traveling so we could be wealthy. So you don't have to do anything dangerous. Just take a desk job," his father suggested.
"I have to do this for the country. I must! With what's going on in the world, I could just scream!" Dean said with determination.
"Like you need a reason to scream," his sister, Jessica interjected. "And what are those weird movements you've been doing while you were exercising?"
"I picked up a lot of fighting tricks from all the places we traveled to when Dad was working for that trading company. Since returning to America I haven't lost a single fight. I even have been able to take on a bunch of guys at once," Dean answered.
"All right, Dean. Just do what you have to do and stay out of trouble," his father recommended.
XXX
Lieutenant Howard went to Berlin, Germany to work for the military attache. It was August, 1939 when he started to work for Colonel Forrest who was the army attache.
Dean had learned a few languages during his lifetime, German included. He also had learned how to do office work, typing and skills of that nature while in college. He therefore did a lot of paperwork as he worked for Colonel Forrest. He took opportunities to see the many of the sites of Berlin and even the marching soldiers, the factories and the famous Luftwaffe.
German SS Hauptmann(Captain) Wolfgang Krauser, who was also a commando and a Baron, had been watching Dean as he worked out. In fact several German officers had noticed Dean's brutal and intense workout. Wolfgang was surprised that Dean was in such great condition, having seen him running with a great deal of weight on his back and leaping into the air at unusual speeds and heights with acrobatic ability.
One day as Dean made his way to the officers' mess hall SS Hauptmann(Captain) Wolfgang Krauser greeted him. "I did not think American officers worked out as intensely as you do," he said in English with a little bit of a German accent.
"Just because I work in an office pushing papers it doesn't mean I'm going to let myself get out of shape," Dean answered as he reached out to shake hands. "I am Second Lieutenant Dean Howard. Greetings."
"Greetings. I am SS Hauptmann(Captain) Wolfgang Krauser," he said as he clicked his boots together in the Prussian fashion.
Wolfgang was six feet, two inches tall and weighed two hundred of rock solid muscle. He was also in phenomenal shape. He had light blond hair, blue eyes, perfect Nordic features and a look of Prussian arrogance. His family was of the highest order and actually believed in German superiority long before the Nazis took over Germany. Wolfgang was very arrogant. But in addition to all this he was a very scary individual, feared by many other Germans.
He then took Dean's hand and squeezed Dean's hand as hard as possible. But Dean squeezed his hand back a little harder. Wolfgang checked his hand and made certain it wasn't broken. "I hope I didn't hurt you there. But I have to have my meal and then I have a lot of work to do," Dean answered as he started to walk away.
"Hold it please. I wanted to see how tough you were. I'd like to challenge you to a kickboxing match. But if you are afraid of getting hurt I'll understand," Wolfgang said with confidence. "Especially since I'm proficient in Savate kickboxing and German commando training."
There were several German and American military men watching the exchange between the two men. "All right. I'll accept your challenge. How about 6:00 a.m. tomorrow?" Dean asked.
"That would be fine. We should have the fight in the nearby arena where everyone can see it," Wolfgang answered with gleem in his eyes.
"That will work out just fine," Dean said.
XXX
At 6:00 a.m. Dean showed up at the arena. The place was packed with German, British, French and American military and their wives and girlfriends. There were even some reporters there.
"Oh yes. I forgot to tell you that I have extensive training in Thai kickboxing and Aikido as well. Feel free to back out now if you want," Wolfgang said as he waited for Dean to step into the fighting area.
"I've trained in several fighting styles. So I don't have any problem. Let's get this show on the road!" Dean answered fearlessly.
The two faced off and then went at each other. Dean flew at Wolfgang and hit him with several rapid fire punch and kick combinations. Wolfgang was surprised at Dean's rapid fire attack as he was knocked back a few feet as he quickly righted himself and counter attacked with some low savate kicks and boxing maneuvers. He got a few strikes in and Dean toughed out the blows. But Wolfgang did not stop there. He then grabbed Dean, threw him into the air, and slammed him into the ground.
But when he went to kick Dean in the head while he was down Dean moved with lightning speed and hit Wolfgang hard below the belt with several knee strikes. As Wolfgang lurched forward Dean threw Wolfgang into the air, leaped up towards him and slammed Wolfgang on to the ground. This was done so quickly that someone who wasn't paying attention would have missed it.
As Wolfgang was recovering from this attack, Dean used this time to recover a little bit. But before he could do anything else Wolfgang hit him with an attack Dean had never seen before. Wolfgang scraped the floor with his feet thus creating electrical fiction. Then he used his ki to channel and increase the energy to his hands creating an electric energy ki blast. Wolfgang was so practiced at this that the process took less than a fraction of a second.
Wolfgang then yelled "Blitzen Faust!" as he blasted Dean with this attack while Dean was several feet away.
"Yeow!" Dean screamed as he was knocked back.
The people who were watching the fight were yelling and screaming some rooted for Dean some for Wolfgang. "C'mon Dean! Give him that scream you're so famous for!" an American Captain from Topeka, Kansas yelled out.
"Show this upstart the superiority of the master race!" an SS officer yelled out to Wolfgang. The place was going wild with excitement.
Tanya Forrest, Colonel Forrest's daughter was also there. She had arrived with a young army officer that was the son of a friend of her father's. She was five feet four inches tall weighing about one hundred and twenty pounds. She had beautiful blond hair, blue eyes and a figure to die for. She had been the center of the attention until the fight started.
Dean landed on his feet as he was knocked back. He saw Wolfgang moving towards him at super-speed when Dean let out a sonic boom. "Heeeyaaahaa!" Dean screamed a sonic boom, focusing his ki through his hands hitting Wolfgang as he ran right into it. Dean always had a loud scream that could break glass. While he was in China a zen monk had taught him how to channel his ki so he could use this as an attack.
As Wolfgang was knocked back Dean struck the ground with his foot creating a shockwave that made Wolfgang trip and fall. As Dean moved in Wolfgang legsweeped him knocking Dean back and off his feet. Dean managed to use his acrobatics to land on his feet as Wolfgang had gotten up. Then both men ran towards each other. At this point they were going at it toe to toe and fighting in a dragon ballz manner.(1)
"They're really going at it. I've never seen a fight like this!" a marine officer said enjoying the fight.
"Yeah, that Dean fellow fights pretty good for an army guy," another marine said.
The fight went on, but eventually Dean's superior speed won the day so he stunned Wolfgang. Then Dean let out another scream that knocked Wolfgang out. The people there who weren't German cheered. The American military men cheered the loudest. Even Tanya found herself cheering.
After he had cleaned up, Dean went to work. As soon as he got to the office a sergeant told him Colonel Forrest wanted to see him right away.
Dean went to the Colonel's office and knocked on the door. "Enter!" he heard a voice call out from inside the office. When he entered the office and saluted the colonel regarded him then returned the salute.
"Well, Lieutenant, looks like you've been in a fight. Do you want to tell me about it? Never mind I already know. I don't want something like this to happen again. Do you understand me, Lieutenant?" Colonel Forrest demanded of Lt. Howard.
"Yes, Sir!" Lt. Howard answered.
"Good. Now go back to work!" He ordered.
XXX
In September Germany attacked Poland and conquered it. Britain and France immediately declared war on Germany. Dean therefore had a lot of paperwork but he got it done.
Next day Colonel Forrest had a scheduled lunch with Commander Victor Henry, nicknamed Pug, his wife and son who had been in Poland when the Germans attacked the country. The colonel's wife and daughter would also be there.
"Gee, Dad, is Lt. Howard coming along too?" his daughter Tanya asked with anticipation as her father looked at her thoughtfully.
"I can have him come along. But I don't see why he should come along.."
"Oh go ahead and invite him, Charles!" the colonel's wife, Charlotte, insisted. She knew her daughter liked Dean and she had investigated Dean's family and knew they were very rich making him a good catch for her daughter.
The colonel acquiesced and invited Dean to lunch with them. But he forewarned Dean not to embarrass the U.S. army or try anything funny with his daughter.
They had lunch at a restaurant in Berlin. When an announcer had announced that Germany had conquered Poland and ordered everyone to stand, the Americans at the table remained seated. Their waiter was offended with them sitting through the German national anthem and proceeded to jostle their plates and treat them roughly.
"I want to see your head waiter!" Pug demanded. But the waiter answered back roughly and walked away. But Pug kept on insisting and eventually explained to the head waiter how they were neutrals and the bad attitude of the waiter. After this the head waiter screamed at the waiter and the waiter then acted congenially towards them once again.
"Way to go, Dad." Pug's son, Byron said. The German anthem had upset him because he had seen what Germany had done to Poland up close.
"Now that's how you deal with the Germans. Did you get all that Lieutenant?" Colonel Forrest said to Lt. Howard. "There was no need to engage in fisticuffs."
"Wait a minute. Are you the famous screaming dean?" Byron asked with interest. "I heard you licked an S.S. officer. A lot of the Germans I've been spoken with said you cheated by screaming your head off."
"He didn't cheat! So he screamed. Big deal! He won that fight fair and square!" Tanya interjected as her father gave her a quieting look.
"Don't go encouraging him. I'll tell you something, Pug. I gave the lieutenant a dressing down for that fight. He could have just refused it," the colonel answered.
"Was the German hard to beat, Lieutenant?" Pug asked interested. He had noticed that the lieutenant was disciplined and dressed sharply in a military manner. He wished his son, Byron, would take after this young man.
"Yes, sir. He was a lot tougher than I thought he'd be but I licked him just as well. I've had a lot of varied training from all over the world," Dean answered with pride.
"Well it better not happen again! We don't need any trouble with the Germans right now," the colonel said in a grumpy manner as the colonel's daughter continued to give adoring looks at Dean all through lunch.
XXX
As Dean was walking to work he noticed several people being driven away in trucks. "Gee, they look like Jews!" Dean thought as he walked to work.
When he entered the building a sergeant told him that the general wanted to see him right away. After exchanging salutes Colonel Forrest got down to business.
"Lt. Howard, I'm sending you to Paris, France. You'll be working for the military attache there. I want you to stay out of trouble. Do I make myself clear?" The colonel asked in an authoritative tone.
"Yes, Sir!" Dean answered.
"Good now pack up your gear and get on the first train out of here!"
XXX
February, 1940. Paris, France.
One day after work as Dean went towards the officer's club where he noticed a beautiful French woman. She was five feet six inches tall weighing 125 pounds. She was very curvaceous and buxom with milky white skin and long black hair. As she walked through the street she was accosted by four men. These were cloak and dagger types. She let out a scream that was quickly stifled as the men dragged her away.
Dean immediately ran into the dark alley they dragged her into. As Dean saw the men drag her into an empty shack, Dean listened in and heard them speaking French, a language Dean had mastered.
"Your father will either stop trying to induce France to attack Germany or we ourselves will kill you. More importantly he will give us the French military codes," the Gestapo agent said in French with a German accent. "We will decide when the Sitzkrieg(phony war) is over."
"My father will keep trying to spur France into action. And he will never give up those codes," the woman exclaimed with defiance.
The Gestapo agent slapped her knocking her down after which the other men picked her up. "Your father will give into our demands at any rate. As for now, let's have some fun," the agent said as he began to tear her clothes off to the smiles of the others. At this point Dean broke through the door and rushed the lead agent knocking him out.
The others attacked him whipping out knives as they moved in on him. Dean struck the three remaining agents with several roundhouse kicks in that he did in a rapid fire procession. After this the agents slumped to the floor.
"You all right? Dean asked the young woman. He could not take his eyes off of her as she covered herself up first then kicked the unconscious lead Gestapo agent in the head.
"I'm fine. Let me call my father," she said as she went to the phone and called the authorities. In a few minutes French soldiers showed up with the woman's father, a man in a general's uniform.
"Charlotte! Are you all right?" General De Cartier asked with concern. General De Cartier was a descendant of the famous musketeer of the same name.
"I'm fine Father. This American soldier saved me from these German spies," Charlotte answered as she gestured to Dean.
"My thanks, Monsieur. What is your name?" The General asked.
"I'm Second Lieutenant Dean Howard. I work for the American military attache," Dean answered standing at attention.
"Well, I will commend you to your commanding officer. My daughter is very precious to me and so is my country. Are you the famous Screaming Dean, the one who defeated one of the toughest fighters in the German SS?" the general asked a little impressed.
"Yes, sir. That's me all right. I was ordered not to get in any trouble but I couldn't stand by and let your daughter be abused like that," Dean answered.
"Would that all Americans thought that way. I've been trying to get France to attack but the government doesn't want to do that. They plan to wait for Germany to attack. Maybe this incident will change their minds but I doubt that," the general stated.
"I'll have to write a report over what happened here. Is there anything you want me to add to my report? Writing a report from a great general like you would really help my career," Dean answered hopefully.
XXX
Colonel Crockett, who was the military attache to France was reading over Lt. Howard's report. He had gotten calls from General De Cartier and other high ranking French military officers praising Lt. Howard's heroism.
One of the colonel's French associates told him, "I wondered when we'd see the American fighting spirit. So when will we see the rest of it?"
The colonel wasn't too impressed with Dean but he was impressed with the fact that the French were impressed. He decided he'd have the lieutenant observe the French foot soldiers, air force, armor and their Maginot Line. One thing was certain. The lieutenant would never enter any German territory again. Germany had denied sending the agents that were captured but the colonel knew they were furious.
Thanks to Lt. Howard, the French had some ideas what the Germans knew about their military. They had also figured out how to use the information the spies had to capture some of the other spies in France. The French were very happy with Lt. Howard.
"Trying to get us in the war kind of early, eh Lieutenant?" the colonel asked a bit sarcastically. Before Dean could answer the colonel continued.
"I've heard a lot about you from Colonel Forrest. To tell the truth I really don't care. But the French seem to like you and I want you to use that. I'm sending you to observe their infantry, air force, armor and their Maginot Line. Now do everything you can to stay in their good graces. Flatter their military a little whenever you can.
But when you write your report to me, tell me the cold, hard truth. Give it to me straight. Don't pull any punches. You have an opportunity to give your career a boost. Don't blow it. That will be all. Dismissed!" the colonel ordered.
Lt. Howard snapped a salute and left.
XXX
The French were happy to show Dean their military. Dean always put the best face on any criticism the French heard from him. But his reports to Colonel Crockett were strictly factual. Dean noticed that their armor were sparsely spread around the infantry. The Germans armored vehicles and tanks were structured into crack units. The French tanks weren't as good as the German tanks were. Nor were the tank crews as well trained.
Dean felt the German way was more efficient. He tried to gently suggest that the French do the same but his words fell on deaf ears.
He noticed that the French soldier was not really in the spirit. The French soldier seemed to just be going through the motions not taking the situation and the war too seriously. He gently suggested that the French attack while the going was good. This was their best chance for a victory. But they simply patted him on the back and told him not to worry about it.
As Dean got a tour of the Maginot Line he was impressed with the fortifications. But as he observed the French and German frontier, he noticed that the Germans were mobilizing at a rapid rate. The Germans could never get through the Maginot line. But they could easily get around it. Dean had wondered if a tank could get through the Ardennes Forrest.
He talked some French tank drivers into helping him with an experiment. He was in one of the larger French tanks as he was driven through the Ardennes Forrest. It could be done! But the Germans would probably never use this area, hopefully.
After he had given the colonel another report and left for the officer's club Charlotte walked up to him. "Hello," she said in English. Her English wasn't bad and the French accent only made her sound more sexy.
"Hi there," Dean said nervously. "How have you been?" Dean found it hard to believe that such a beautiful woman was even talking to him.
"My father and some military men would like you to have dinner us. I can walk with you over there if you like?" Charlotte requested with a beautiful smile.
Dean was a bit speechless. "Go ahead, Lieutenant!" Major Parks, an officer who also worked for Colonel Crockett ordered. "See it as part of your duty!"
"Yes sir!" Dean responded.
"I had hoped you'd show up because you liked me. But instead you have to be ordered to show up!" Charlotte asked a little displeased.
"Oh, it's not like that. I'm just a little nervous. I find it hard to believe a gorgeous woman like you is even talking to me," Dean answered.
"Well, don't be nervous. I find you very attractive. I was wondering if I could hear your famous scream," Charlotte requested.
"Um, maybe later," Dean answered.
XXX
"What kind of chances do you think we have against the Germans, Lt. Howard?" Colonel De Gualle asked Dean, a friend of General De Cartier who had also been invited to dinner along with several senior and even few junior officers.
"Well your Maginot Line is impregnable. And you have a lot of experienced officers and men. On paper you have the best army in the world." Dean answered.
"Yes, on paper," De Gaulle responded. "Tell us all what you really think. Don't worry about hurting our feelings. And explain how you think the Germans can get their tanks through the Ardennes Forrest."
"Well," Dean hesitated. "I was on one of your largest tanks and the tank was able to move right through the Ardennes. I was also at the Maginot Line. The Germans are mobilizing at a fast rate. I'm sure they'll go right through Netherlands and Belgium in no time flat. The Blitzkrieg is very effective. The armor, the infantry and even the air force work as a team, like a well oiled machine.
If the Germans have figured out how traverse the Ardennes with their tanks and if you're not ready for the attack, your entire front might collapse," Dean answered.
"I agree," De Gaulle said. "I don't want to believe it. But I know it's true. A friend of mine saw you on that tank. He was shocked when he saw the tank move through the Ardennes."
"One tank could get through. But a whole division? Nonsense!" Colonel Pierre said. I also have friends near the front. I even have associates in the Belgium and Netherlands ministry offices. These countries will allow our armies to enter as soon as the Germans attack them. So there is nothing to worry about."
"I believe we should have attacked Germany when they were busy with Poland. We could have beaten them easily then," General De Cartier exclaimed.
"I think we should have as well. But that doesn't matter now. If the Germans attack us they will smash themselves to pieces against our defenses," a general answered.
"If Germany attacks through the Ardennes France is finished," Dean thought.
XXX
June, 1940. Paris, France.
"Well it's all over for the French," Colonel Crockett said. "The Germans are right outside the gates of Paris. Oh, you've got new orders, Lieutenant. You are to leave at once. The higher ups want to talk to you about the Ardennes and how the Germans went right through it."
As Dean left for the train to Madrid, Spain, General De Cartier and his daughter Charlotte approached him. "I have a favor to ask you Lieutenant. Could you take my daughter with you? I know you're being sent back to America. My daughter has her passport and tickets with her. So she can leave without any kind of problem. But I'd feel better if she were with you."
"Well, I have no problem with her travelling with me. But what about you? Aren't you leaving as well?" Dean asked as the bombs were going off miles away.
"No, I must stay here. I plan to fight to the end. Somehow, someway we'll win this war. Tell your superiors and the British that for me," De Cartier requested.
"But Father, I should stay here with you!" Charlotte protested.
"No child. It's best you leave. You can fight for France by working for our government in exile. Don't let the world forget about us," the general ordered.
Charlotte took Dean's arm and went with him towards the train. She gave one last look at her father then left.
XXX
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I thought it would be best to end it here. I don't know how long this story will be but I plan to end it with the end of World War Two.
(1) This means the combatants are going toe to toe fighting furiously with countless punches, kicks, blocks and counter attacks. Much like they do on Dragonball Z.