AnIntrovertsPen Writing Prompt #1
"Are you naturally this much of a pain or do you try?"
Set Season 2/3
For once it was a quiet day in the office. Unfortunately, this meant they had plenty of time to catch up with reports, expenses and forms explaining Yes-I-had-to-shoot-him-he-tried-to-blow-my-head-off as well as other miscellaneous paperwork. The only good thing about it was that it stopped Hetty's complaints about budgets.
Deeks had got bored pretty quickly, unused to the sheer amount of paperwork required, and felt like he deserved a break. He decided to take it away from his desk because when he had started fidgeting with his pen earlier Sam had made a gesture that implied he would no longer have a functioning hand if he continued. Never let it be said that Marty Deeks didn't pick up on body language.
With that in mind he made himself a coffee. It didn't take long for him to decide that it was taking too long so Deeks amused himself briefly by straightening the area up. None of these people seemed to appreciate neatness. Except Sam. But he was ex-Navy and didn't count. After taking a gulp of delicious, delicious coffee (hey, the stuff down at LAPD was the most horrid concoction known to man) the logical thing to do was to get back to work. Even Sam seemed to ne terrified of Hetty and when a large Navy Seal was scared of someone Deeks thought it was generally good practice to follow their lead.
But he didn't want to go back to reports. They were boring. He wanted to talk to Kensi, you know - partner bonding and all that. Deeks stood over her, casting a shadow across her face. She looked up, irritated.
"I need to get this done, Deeks."
He grinned charmingly, "Want to take a break, stretch your legs?"
"Not until this is done." she said looking down and continuing with her report, ignoring him.
"Oh, come on!" he whined quietly, not quietly enough.
He had attracted the attention of the senior team members.
"Already done?" Callen asked curiously, voice tinged in disbelief.
"If that's the case, he doesn't get enough work," Sam said, not looking up.
Rolling his eyes, Deeks quipped, "I'm good, not that good."
"So? Get on with it then." said Sam.
"Need to take a break, you know, uncramp my legs, relax the old noggin." Deeks explained patiently.
All the federal agents gave him a look. Kensi looked pointedly over his shoulder. Deeks felt a chill rush through him.
Spinning around he exclaimed cheerfully, "Hetty!"
The diminutive woman looked up at him, "Work too difficult to finish, Mr Deeks?" That stare was creepy. "Do you require assistance?"
Back pedalling Deeks stammered, "No, no. I'm good. In fact, I'm brilliant. Brilliant at getting work done. Like, my reports! Yeah, I can do my reports."
The team snickered behind him as Hetty gave him a long look. He started to sweat before she smiled slightly and nodded. Once he saw her return to her "office" he turned back to his team only to see Callen and Sam smirking and Kensi shaking her head.
"I think she likes me," he announced.
Kensi snorted.
"So," he said, nudging his partner. "About that break? Coffee? Walk? Spar a bit?"
Looking at him incredulously, she asked, "You still want a break, even after Hetty calling you out?"
"Yeah, it's all good. I'll get the work done. I work better with regular breaks."
"Hey you're like a puppy!" snarked Sam.
"Hetty said, 'no sparring until all reports are done' by the way," Callen added.
Sam looked at his partner in surprise.
"When did she say that?"
"After she walked in on you working on the punching bag in the middle of the day with no report typed up."
"That was one time!"
Ignoring their reference to something that was obviously before his time, Deeks insisted, "Breaks are good and healthy. Prevents stress and anxiety. Healthy body, healthy mind and all that."
"Uh hmm" Kensi ignored him and shuffled some papers on her desk. "Does anyone remember what colour the coats were in that boutique that got its display destroyed last week? They're demanding payment and according to Hetty different colours had wildly different prices."
"Blue, I think," Callen said after thinking.
"Indigo," corrected Deeks.
They all looked at him.
Raising his hands, he said jokingly, "Hey, don't blame me if the detective is better at detecting things."
Kensi blinked at him and corrected her report.
"Speaking of coats, did you return that leather jacket to wardrobe?" Callen asked Kensi.
Swearing under her breath Kensi got up and began looking around.
"I can't even remember where I took it off," she said in dismay.
"You left it over by the printer, I think," said Sam.
Nodding at him, Kensi got up to search. Deeks darted over to her and smirked, pouring on the charm (Which didn't seem to work on this partner of his but he'll keep trying).
"I'll help you,"
"Seriously, Deeks?"
"Well, who knows where you sp carelessly left Hetty's precious leather jacket? It might require a most thorough search. Two heads are better than one." he joked.
Kensi gave him a look. "Are you that bored?"
His shoulders slumped. "Yes," he whined. "But only because this place takes itself way too seriously on paperwork. Like, seriously? Why are there separate forms for the different types of property destruction? I would have been done ages ago if it wasn't for all that!"
Well, not really. He really did have the attention span of a puppy when it came to paperwork but she didn't need to know that.
Just like she didn't need to know that the reason he got distracted in the first place was because he forgot how part of an op went as she looked so badass barking out orders to a suspect. God, Kensi was intimidating. And hot. Oops she was giving him a weird look. Did she ask him something?
"Let me help!" he reiterated.
She put her hands on her hips, left eyebrow raised. "Or, what?"
"Or, or-" he grabbed a piece of paper off the printer, "-I'll throw paper wads at you."
"You'll throw paper wads at me," she repeated incredulously.
"Yep." and to prove his point, he scrunched the paper up and lobbed it at her head.
She batted it away and glared at him.
"Are you naturally this much of a pain ir do you try?"
Sam chuckled, they mustn't have been as quiet as he thought. "You can't naturally be that annoying."
Deeks just shot another charming smile at her, darn it - still no response, "This is all charisma, Kensalina. Completely innate."
"Uh huh," she replied, unconvinced.
"Part of the Marty Deeks complete package." he added.
All three of them groaned.