Midnight: Damn plot bunny bugged me forever. Don't really have a suitable summary for this one.

Otaku: I it.

Disclaimer: If I own Harry Potter or Transformers I wouldn't be writing this I would be taking a money bath in a solid gold hot tub damn it. –pouts-

Summary: Harry was pushed through the Veil and ends up smack in the middle of Mission City during the battle over the cube. Afterwards he joins NEST. AU. After Final Battle screw the Epilogue and during the First Transformer movie. Mech/Mech Human/Mech Man/man. Michaela didn't go with Sam to get the glasses Miles did. SLASH

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Chapter 1

"Shit!" He screamed as he dodged another missile. "Shit! Shit! Double Shit! Shit! S-s-s-h-h-h-i-i-it! Merlin's fuzzy blue balls!"

Harry swore again as he dodged two giant robots fighting. "Morgana's glorious tits, where the bloody hell am I?"

The twenty-seven year old wizard shouted again, pissed as he dove behind a group of military men. All who were busy at the moment, firing at what looked like a flying giant Dorito. 'Great I'll never look at Doritos the same way again.'

"Holy fuckin' Merlin, I swear if I survive this, I'm kicking Weasley's bloody arse to France and back." Harry swore, cursing the fact that he lost his wand when he landed in this Merlin-be-damned place as he leaned back against the upturned car-turned shield. Turning to the soldier next to him, who he noticed absently was hot, he remarked with surprising calmness. "You know," He started. "My day started out normal."

"Doesn't it always." The African American soldier replied, handing him a very large gun. "Just point and shoot at the ones with red eyes."

" 'Kay." He took aim and fired with more accuracy then he expected. "Really. My day really did... until I went to work to study the Veil as was my department's assignment- when my, now ex, best friend decides that since," Harry told the mans as he shot at the flying robot, or Dorito as he called it in his head. "I didn't want to marry his sister that I deserved to die. I told him why I didn't want to marry Ginny. 1. I'm gay, and 2." -He shot at again Dorito- "She's a manipulative bitch who tried to use a love potion on me! But no, he thought it's because I'm Dark or some bullshit like that, (I really wasn't paying attention) and pushed me into a damned ancient magical relic of Death! Really who does that?" The Wizard seemed more indignant over the fact that he was pushed into the Veil, rather than being pushed by his 'best friend.'

"Why the hell are ya telling me this now? When we're being shot at?" The man asked, wondering if the stranger was just a wee bit mad. "And what the fuck do you mean?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "I'm telling you this because I've been shot at, nearly blown up and almost squished by 50 foot tall robots!" Harry shouted over the gunfire before they both ducked down to reload. Catching a magazine from the soldier, Harry continued. "And I don't give a damn about the Secrecy Act since it's apparent that I'm not in my dimension. How I know this? Because in my world, I know for a fact there aren't giant robots running rapid! Plus I think that last explosion knocked what little screws I had loose."

"Ya think?" Was his response as the other chuckled, "So you're telling me your best friend pushed you through a-what did ya call it?" – "Damned ancient magical relic of Death." - "Yeah, a relic of Death that sent ya to another dimension because you're gay and didn't marry his sister?"

"Pretty much," Harry retorted.

"Just one question."

"Yeah?"

"Who the fuck are you?"

"Harry Bloody Potter, Man-who-lived, Dark-Lord-Slayer, 27 English man, ex-wizard, former CMW and CO of the Unspeakables, etc." He bowed mockingly. "At your service, mate."

"Wizard?"

"Ex-wizard, seems I lost my wand when dodging Mr. Doritos' missiles and without it I can't do any offensive or defensive magic. Though I can still heal."

"Sucks ta be you."

"Don't I know it? And you are?"

"Sargent Robert Epps, call me Epps. U.S. Marine."

"Nice to meet you Epps, call me Harry."

"Also, Mr. Dorito? Really? That dude's Starscream."

"Stars cream? Really? Who the hell names their kid that?"

"Touché'."

"Personally I like Mr. Dorito better."

"Why?"

"He looks like a flying chip. A crazy high pitched flying Dorito chip!"

A missile whizzed past Harry's head causing Harry to shout as it blew up. "With a missile fetish!"

A barrage of gunfire struck right where Harry's head had been seconds before. The Wizard paused before he turned to a laughing Epps and asked innocently, with a mischievous look in his emerald eyes, "Do you think he heard me?"

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Midnight: Yes, Harry he did.

Otaku: I think so too... though I don't think he'd miss.

Midnight: What did you think? Good? Bad? Don't Care? Please Review.