I'm sick of trying to justify why I have no friends, as if finding a reason for it will help at all.
I'm sick of trying to fool myself into believing that the next tech toy will make me happy,
that porn is just as good as love, that I will outgrow my social ineptitude.
I'm sick of living my life in purgatory,
believing that tomorrow will be better,
or next year, or next job, or someday.
I'm sick of being depressed when everyone says I should be fine.
I'm sick of trying to find a reason to live rather than enjoying life itself.
I'm sick of waiting, the wondering, the loneliness, the unbearable sadness.
And if this is all life is, why postpone the inevitable?