In That Moment
Just a little one-shot that bit me a couple weeks ago. To those who are reading my 'Rose by Any other name' fic, this is completely separate from that. This is just a little thing that occurred to me while watching ROTF. And yes, Ratchet really does say what he says in the fic! O.o
Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers, at all.
The small base just miles outside of Tranquility was buzzing with activity. Having just arrived back from Egypt only days before, everyone was trying their damnedest to salvage what they could from the aftermath of the situation. A cover story had been fed to the media, claiming a mass terrorist attack supplemented by a demented, long-winded hacker that liked to call himself 'the fallen'.
People were, for the most part, just glad the clamor was coming to a close... except for one particular human (pfft) whose tie was either too tight or, in a lot of people's opinions, not tight enough.
Galloway had not shut up since being fished out of the random spot of desert he had landed in. He found ways to complain about any tiny detail... how the news was reporting the story, Sam being a civilian was allowed to freely interact with the autobots, soldiers were giving him dirty looks, he'd ruined his best suit, the list went on and on.
It was during one of these now famous tirades that Mikaela had finally had enough. "Okay seriously, shut up! No one wants to hear about how bad a week you've had, we've all had a slagging hell of a week!"
Galloway turned a sneer towards her. "Miss Banes, you don't technically have the right to be here, so I suggest you keep your sass to yourself."
"Actually, I do have the right. I'm slated to be an intern here, starting in just a few days."
Galloway's expression fell. "Intern? What will you be doing exactly?"
Mikaela smiled fondly. "I'll be working with Ratchet, the autobot's medic."
Galloway's face took on a decidedly snide look. "Ah, yes. I seem to remember that scrap heap as the one bot actually trying to leave our planet. Not that I'm complaining."
Mikaela froze at this. "What did you just say?"
Galloway smirked. "I said, the ambulance was the robot who told the others they should all leave the planet, didn't seem to think we were worth his attention. If Lennox hadn't diverted our flight path, they wouldn't even be here."
Mikaela was seeing red at that point, and marched up to the liaison until they were practically nose to nose. "We owe them our lives, our planet, and our very way of life, sir! You could at least show a little gratitude and not insult their honor!"
Galloway removed his glasses to polish them, looking down his nose at Mikaela. "Please, Honor? We're talking about machines here, not-"
Mikaela's fist connected with his nose, cutting off the rest of the insult. The punch was enough to knock him flat onto his back, and in the silence that followed, you could've heard a glitch mouse two hangars away.
Galloway didn't get up, and at first, neither did anyone else. After a few moments of people staring from Mikaela's enraged expression to the unconscious and bleeding liaison on the ground, a medic finally moved forward to make sure he was still alive. Mikaela spun around and strode out of the hangar, still fuming. She didn't hear the quiet comment made by a smiling Epps as she retreated.
"That's our girl!"
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Ratchet had finally finished the last of the repairs, and sent his Prime directly to quarters under strict orders to get some rest. Just as he was putting the last of his tools away, he heard familiar footsteps approaching. He smiled warmly as Mikaela strolled in, but frowned when he saw her cradling her rapidly swelling right hand. "Mikaela- what have you done to your hand?"
"I think I broke it."
He gently lifted her up to his workbench, and started scanning her hand. "There's a small fracture on the base knuckle of your index finger... how did this happen? You didn't get this in Egypt."
Mikaela shifted uncomfortably. "Galloway has a really hard head."
Ratchet snorted as he fetched a small hand brace and some ibuprofen. "We're all well aware of that, how does that coincide with your hand?"
Mikaela took a breath and winced at the pain in her hand. "I may have hit him..."
Ratchet turned an incredulous expression on his student. "You may have hit him?"
Skids suddenly poked his head in, his twin right below him. "Hit him? Man, she laid 'is aft out!"
"Straightened 'is attitude up real quick!"
"Too bad 'e can't say the same fo' his nose!"
Ratchet raised a wrench in warning and the two trotted off, still laughing. Mikaela shrugged sheepishly at Ratchet, who was shaking his head as he helped her slip the brace on. Handing her the ibuprofen and directing her to a water cooler, he cycled air through his vents, and leaned his frame against the workbench. "So, youngling, what brought about this uncharacteristic outburst? I've never known you to lose your temper with the likes of Galloway."
Mikaela swallowed the pills before turning to answer. "He hasn't shut his mouth since we got back! I finally got fed up with it and told him to shut up!"
Ratchet's optics widened. "With your fist?"
"No, I didn't just walk up and punch him. He started on this tirade about how I don't have a right to be here, I answered that I was now an intern, and I DO have the right to be here. He asked what I would be doing, I told him working with you."
Mikaela froze and looked up at her mentor. "Should I not have told him that?"
Ratchet shook his head. "He would've found a way to find out anyway, don't worry about it."
Mikaela shrugged, leaning back against Ratchet's arm. "Anyway, he started spewing this junk about how you were trying to get the other autobots to leave Earth because we weren't worth saving, or something like that."
Ratchet went stock still at this, unnoticed by Mikaela.
"He was like... 'uhhh, that medic bot wouldn't even still be here if Lennox hadn't turned the plane...' or some slag like that. I don't know, I got mad when he started suggesting that you would've abandoned us and... I told him to not insult your honor, kinda stupid now I guess. But he started to say something about you guys not having any honor and that's when I hit him. I couldn't help it. I couldn't just stand there and let him insult you like that."
Mikaela looked up at Ratchet, who looked stunned. "So, you punched him because you thought he was insulting my honor?"
"Yeah."
Ratchet had a pained look on his face, causing Mikaela straighten in concern. "Ratchet, what's wrong? I'm sorry I lost control like that..."
"No, Mikaela, that's not the problem."
Ratchet leaned down so he was eye-level with his young pupil. "The truth is, I DID say that we should leave Earth. I said it right after Optimus had been offlined. Galloway had pulled some strings and when we arrived at the base in New Jersey..."
Ratchet trailed off as he saw the stricken expression on Mikaela's face. "You... you wanted to leave? Right then? You were just gonna go?"
"I..."
Ratchet found himself unable to answer, unable to deny her accusation, his optics cast down at the floor. He heard Mikaela's steps as she slowly walked towards the door, heard her open it and close it slowly behind her, but he never looked up, never moved to stop her.
Outside the medbay, Mikaela stopped just outside the door to catch her breath. Unbidden, memories of the lessons she'd learned under the gruff CMO bubbled to the surface of her mind.
"We aren't cars, but the structure and wiring is similar."
Mikaela was peering at Bumblebee's leg, still damaged after Mission City. Ratchet pointed to one of the joint mechanisms.
"Can you tell me what's wrong here?"
Mikaela spotted the tiny cracks along the edges, as well as numerous scratches and scrapes marring the metal. She also noticed the sludge gathered around the rim.
"It's cracked, and is in dire need of a deep clean."
Ratchet had nodded. "Is that all?"
Mikaela peered closer, then noticed the clear fluid seeping from one of the cracks.
"It's leaking, there must be a nick in one of the lines."
Ratchet gave a crisp nod.
Mikaela leaned against the wall, remembering helping Ratchet repair both Bumblebee and Jazz, who had rejoined them shortly after thanks to the shard of the Allspark Optimus had recovered. Ratchet had been impressed with her work, and had continued her lessons over the months that followed. They had exchanged stories of their lives before they'd met, Mikaela expressing sympathy for what had happened on Cybertron, and Ratchet telling her he hoped to meet her father someday.
Mikaela recalled a conversation she'd had with Ratchet as they were finishing up the last adjustments on Bumblebee's unconscious form.
"How long do you think you guys are going to stay on Earth?"
Ratchet had hmm'd at this question. "Why do you ask? Are you tired of us already?" He'd been joking, though she hadn't realized it at the time.
"No, I'm not tired of you. It's just... there are still decepticons on Earth, right?"
Ratchet had stopped what he was doing to face her. "Prime has resolved not to let our war consume your planet as it consumed ours, and I agree with him. It's our fault this mess came to your world, and we will stay as long as it takes to clean it up".
Mikaela's expression turned to relief, and a small smile graced Ratchet's features.
"We aren't going to let your people be butchered by the glitches we unintentionally led to your planet."
Mikaela wiped a frustrated hand at her eyes, remembering how week after week, she and Ratchet had joked about her lessons continuing until she was old and could no longer lift a wrench. How she had teased that he wouldn't have changed at all and she would be buzzing around in an electric wheelchair, waving a wrench as he did at all who incurred her wrath. The thought had left them both laughing.
'...He would've just left. No goodbyes, no sorry I have to go, nothing. Not even a post-it note.'
Mikaela pushed herself away from the wall, feeling like she had just come from a funeral. She made her way, zombie-like, back to the main hangar, not looking at any of the bots. Lennox spotted her and walked up with a barely contained grin on his face. "You alright? Heard Galloway's nose broke your hand!"
Mikaela tried to smile but failed, only managing a grimace. Lennox took hold of her good hand between his own, lowering his voice. "By the way, you have the eternal gratitude of every- and I do mean EVERY, soldier on this base. If you ever need anything, anything at all, you have only to ask, princess!"
"Is there someone available to take me home?"
Lennox nodded with a smile. "Yeah, I think Ratchet wanted to-"
"He's busy at the moment."
Lennox frowned at her outburst, but nodded. "Alright. I'll get one the drivers to take you. Unless you want to ask one of the autobots?"
Mikaela shook her head, wandering out of the hangar to wait for her ride. She'd thought about calling Sam to take her, but she didn't want to know if Bumblebee had known about Ratchet's intentions. She didn't want to know if Bee would've abandoned Sam the way Ratchet would've abandoned her. She shook her head angrily.
'Abandoned me? He was never my guardian to begin with. Just a teacher, if that.'
As she stood there, her mind started wandering down dark paths, and every doubt she'd managed to stomp down emerged to torment her all over again. Did Ratchet even care? Or was he just humoring her? Did the others care? What good would it do for her, a flicker in existence next to these beings, to learn any more about them? Maybe Ratchet didn't really want her around?
She managed to hold back tears as a black SUV pulled up even with her, a soldier motioning with a smile for her to get in. She climbed in without a word, without a peek over her shoulder. If she had looked back, she would've seen a certain autobot medic watching her departure with sad optics.
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Mikaela had been avoiding people, she knew that. She also knew that it was childish of her to do it. Sam, at least, seemed to understand. He had been quiet the last few days too. They had talked briefly on the phone, a conversation that only lasted about four minutes. They still loved each other, still wanted to be together, but they had both needed a few days by themselves to regroup.
Mikaela's phone rang, startling her out of her depressed reverie. Looking at the ID, she couldn't help the smile that appeared.
'Speak of the devil...'
"Hey Sam."
"Hey beautiful! How ya feeling?"
"Alright I guess. How 'bout you?"
"I'm feeling a little cabin-feverish, Bee and I are thinking about going out and about for a drive, and we would love it if you would join us!"
Mikaela's first reaction was to decline, not wanting to be around an autobot that long, but then she stopped herself. This was Bumblebee! What had Bumblebee ever done to deserve this kind of treatment? She had no proof that he'd known about the fiasco at the base. And she wanted to spend more time with Sam, especially now that they had confessed their love for one another.
"Mikaela?"
"Yeah, sorry, I'll go. When should I be ready?"
"We'll be there in 10."
"K, I'll be ready!"
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Admittedly, it did feel wonderful. Blazing down the road at speeds that couldn't be legal, windows down, music blaring. Just the feeling of the wind in her hair was soothing. Bumblebee was keeping the mood light, flipping through songs that kept them smiling. Both Sam and Mikaela had slapped the dash playfully at a couple of the song choices.
But throughout the trip, Mikaela couldn't shake the depression that had settled over her since her conversation with Ratchet. Sam had noticed right away when they'd picked her up, and even Bumblebee had given an inquisitive chirp. She had waved them off, saying she was just a little tired and that this drive was probably just what she needed. That had worked for the first half of the drive. Eventually, spending time with Sam and Bumblebee had reminded her of the friendship she thought she'd developed with Ratchet, and only served to further her misery.
By the time they made it to a secluded park, Mikaela was near tears. She tried to hide it, but Sam had come up and put his arm around her, and Bee had transformed and outright asked what was wrong.
She let the tears come, and she told them everything. Her outburst, her previous conversations and reassurances from Ratchet, and finally, what Ratchet had said. He'd wanted to leave.
Sam held her tightly through the whole story. He glanced up worriedly at Bumblebee, who was as shocked as he was. Mikaela apologized repeatedly for avoiding them, to Sam and Bumblebee's dismay.
"I didn't want to know..." she sniffled, "I didn't want to know if you'd known, Bee. If you would've gone and left too. I'm sorry for thinking it, but..."
Bumblebee trailed a careful finger through her hair, letting out a small whine. "What else could you have thought? I hardly believe that Ratchet ever said any such thing, honestly. Then again, Prime's death hit us all so hard... but I never received any communication that we were leaving Earth."
Sam continued to stroke his girlfriend's hair, pressing a kiss to her temple. "I think you need to talk to Ratchet, 'kaela. I got a feeling he lost his temper and said something he didn't mean."
Mikaela sniffled and nodded faintly, but didn't answer. Bumblebee activated his holoform and sat on Mikaela's other side, and put an arm around her as well. He and Sam spent the afternoon reassuring her that Ratchet really did care for her, and didn't want her to stop visiting.
Bumblebee, meanwhile, was having a subdued conversation through his comm...
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Mikaela closed the door of the shop behind her, locking up for the evening. It had been a week since she'd told Sam and Bumblebee about what had happened in the medbay, and she was still feeling miserable. As she finished locking and checking the door, she heard a familiar rumble coming up behind her.
She turned and found an all too familiar yellow search and rescue hummer slowly rolling towards her. It stopped a small distance away. The two regarded each other for a few moments, the gaze broken only when Ratchet opened his passenger side door.
When Mikaela hesitated, he let out a very Bumblebee-like whine, and sank on his wheels. With a sigh, Mikaela walked sullenly towards the autobot in disguise and climbed in without a word.
Ratchet pulled out of the lot, turned onto the busy street, and headed towards the lookout. Neither of them spoke, and Ratchet didn't bother with his holoform. Mikaela gazed silently out the window the entire time.
When they reached the lookout, Mikaela slid out of the CMO's cabin and stood a distance away, not looking when he transformed a moment later. Ratchet stood and watched his pupil for a while, noticing the way she stood with her arms crossed, and would glance in his direction out of the corners of her eyes. Recognizing the posture of distrust and irritation, he cycled air through his vents, and settled himself down on the ground beside her. The two watched the sun set for a while, which was quite spectacular that evening. The two in question, though, barely seemed to see it.
Finally, Mikaela seemed to deflate, to give up on the silence. "You've told me..."
She took another breath before continuing. "You've told me so many times... you guys wouldn't just leave us in this mess." She paused, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat. "What happened to 'not leaving us to be butchered by the glitches you led to this planet'?"
She looked like she wanted to say more, but choked up as tears started streaming down her face. She wiped an angry hand at them, staring determinedly towards the sunset.
Ratchet had a look on his face of one being beaten, but knew they deserved it. After several long minutes of listening to Mikaela's muted sniffling, he could no longer stand it.
"If I were human, then I could say 'I'm only human'. But I'm not, I'm cybertronian, and I can only say... that I've never claimed to be perfect. I was angry and hurt at what was happening and, in a moment of weakness, I let those emotions rule my thoughts and actions. Before I had even heard Ironhide's response, I thought of you."
Ratchet glanced hesitantly at Mikaela. "The young human who had so deftly attached herself to my very spark despite all I did to prevent it. And I realized in that moment, that even though you couldn't hear me, I had betrayed you. I had betrayed your trust, and gone back on everything I had ever promised you. And I knew, in that moment, that I could NEVER go through with it, I couldn't even go through the thought of it, abandoning you to fate. I was thankful then that Ironhide, of all bots, was the one with the cool, calm processor, and he said 'that's not what Optimus would've wanted'."
Ratchet paused, as though unsure of his next words."But it wasn't just about what Optimus wanted, it was that..."
Ratchet turned fully to Mikaela. "I would be abandoning and betraying the very creature I hold most dear in this universe, the sparkling ...child, I never had.
Mikaela breath caught at his confession, and she finally turned to meet Ratchet's optics. Everything in her broke at the look of sorrowful sincerity in his optics as he held out his hand to her.
"I am so sorry, Mikaela."
Mikaela couldn't fight her emotions down anymore, and moved forward to his proffered hand. Ratchet lifted her up and held her to his spark as she cried, one of his fingers gently stroking her back. Mikaela accepted his offered comfort, and leaned against him as a child would lean onto a parent.
She realized that Ratchet was crying with her. Moisture was gathering in his optics like condensation and dripping down to meet her own tears on his chassis. They cried together until the sun bid it's farewell, and disappeared below the horizon. The tears finally subsiding, Mikaela looked up at Ratchet who regarded her sadly, finger still stroking her back.
"I was intending to confess my betrayal to you personally, at the appropriate time... I certainly didn't want you to hear about this from Galloway, of all people."
Mikaela sniffled and wiped at her nose. "S'alright, I broke his nose... wasn't hard to do, it was sticking so far up in the air.
Ratchet tried to muffle the chuckles that were escaping him, but then Mikaela started to giggle as well, and they both dissolved into laughter. They laughed as hard as they had cried.
Ratchet was the first to catch his breath. "I apologize for my weakness, and my betrayal, Mikaela. Can you ever forgive an old glitch-head?"
Mikaela shook her head. "No, but I CAN forgive a good-natured but short-tempered autobot medic with too many wrenches lying around his medbay.
Ratchet snorted at this. "Good-natured? Who is this mech?
Not missing a beat, Mikaela replied, "Oh, it's Ironhide's new calling card. Four metric tons of good-natured, trigger-happy destruction."
Ratchet couldn't stop the laughter erupting from his vocal processors. And as he laughed with his adopted daughter, he found himself trying to remember the last time that he had laughed like this. But try as he might, he couldn't remember a time before he knew this human femme, when he had laughed so freely.
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Thanks for reading!
This is meant to be a one-shot, I've got too many other stories to expand this into anything more at this point. But I hope you enjoyed it!
Reviews make me write more! =D
