"This is so good. Never stop writing it."

-- Fucksuck

"Your the mna, future" (man)

-- Wray RP8

"Ths shud b one of them spinoff games like gost babel…"

-- JSACK

"Wen Snake fucked Otacon I thought I was gonna cry it was so romantic (sob)"

-- Snide Wulfe

"A wna hav ur kids out of wedlock, future!"

-- Ficken Chox

"U shud bcme a pro riter future."

-- Scablosky

"OMFGOAB DIS IS DA BEST EVA"

-- Yamah

"OMG LOL BFG HRM VD KFC!"

-- aBBRev

"Yeah, I'm happy I wrote it."

-- Me

These are just some of the many reviews I've received over the years for this fic. They haven't shown up on the review board, 'cos… 'cos the system screwed it up. Yeah, that'll do. Anyway, I'd like to thank you for all your praise. I think that I deserve it, because this is the best fanfic ever.

But if I ever have the chance to get this published, I won't. If they offer me a million dollars and a lifetime supply of porn and drugs, I still won't take it off the site. Because I love my fans. And you love me. Because I'm the best. And you're all shit-eating, poo-jabbing uncle fuckers.

Now, I'd like to give thanks to some people who you don't know or care about…

Thanks to my mum (formerly my dad) and my mum (the drag queen) for getting so smashed they forgot that contraceptives even existed.

Thanks to my first grade maths teacher, for inspiring me to write fanfiction.

And finally, I'd like to thank God for giving me these wonderful talents that elevate me far above anything the rest of you could ever hope for and for punishing people who sin into wheelchairs.

--

Metal Gear Solid III: Dusk of the Congealed

By Gimp Gordo

Doctor Clarke's Journal:

I'm like, so so happy about how things have gone in the past week. First, right? I asked this well fit bird out and she said no yeah? But no but yeah but no 'cos I know that she's probably just y'know playin' hard to get and all yeah right?

Secondly, yeah? We made this well good thing at school. It useda be some sort of guy yeah but we shoved a load of circuitry up his ass and now he's fucking amazing and he has a sword and everything.

Third my boss rang and said that he was going to start the S3 project and the 2G thingy and that basically means, right, that we're gonna make more clones of this WELL FIT soldier Big Boss and give them all a load of weirdass names like Mauve Snake and freaky shit like that.

Fourthly the ninja dude we made is gonna kill me but you're not supposed to know that, you're supposed to figure that out by playing Meta Gear Solid.

Peace out horsefuckers.

--

Anyway, I hope you really enjoyed that chapter. You should have done. And don't be too upset that it's better than anything you could ever do. Please please please review me because my 273829 reviews all disappeared last Wednesday night. Thanks XD