Olivia sat at her desk, bottom lip buried in between her teeth, eyes wide and distant staring at the computer screen in front of her. If you didn't know Olivia, you'd think she was just concentrating on the screen before her, but Nick Amaro had learned Olivia quickly since being her new partner. That distant, not-all-there-look meant she was in deep thought and only could he notice the small frown that was slowly drooping the corners of her lips.

He knew she wasn't all there, because she would have caught him staring at her and would have said something by now. This was almost a daily routine for them. She'd get lost in her head and he'd stare at her until she came back.

After a few moments Nick cleared his throat causing Olivia to finally blink and what looked like finally made her breathe.

"You okay?" He slouched over his desk, his arms folded in front of him, concern written in his features.

She let her lip go with a noise, blinked a couple of times, offered a very, very obvious fake smile and replied, "Yeah, I'm good."

"Liv, you know if you need to talk to someone-about anything, you know I'm here, right? I'm not Elliot, I know, but..."

Olivia stopped listening after she heard his name.

Elliot.

He was the reason for these black out moments during the day when she should be working on her DD5's, but Elliot's stupid face keeps swirling around her head and she can never concentrate.

She's almost forgotten his voice, his smile...

"Liv, you listenin' to me?"

"Hm? Yeah."

"What'd I just say?"

She blinked a few more times. "That you're always a shoulder to lean on."

He smiled warmly at her. "Just lettin' you know."

She smiled back before pushing back her seat and standing up. "Gunna go get a coffee, want anything?" She slipped her coat on before pushing in her chair and rounding her desk heading towards the exit.

Before Nick had a chance to answer her, she was gone.

Once outside, she brisked down the sidewalk before turning into an alley. Checking to make sure the coast was clear, she reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a cigarette. She lit it quickly and took a drag while letting her head fall back against the brick wall behind her.

Olivia had never been a smoker. She wasn't even a drinker, she only did that socially. But smoking was something she delved into during the early stages of Elliot's departure. It seemed to be the only thing to stop her from fidgeting and stressing. She took another drag, closed her eyes and exhaled it slowly.

"You know, they say that every cigarette you smoke takes off five minutes from your life,"

Olivia popped her head up and looked into the direction of the familiar voice.

"Kathy?" Olivia's chest tightened, shock and fear surging through her bones.

"What...what're you doing here? What's wrong?"

"Where's Elliot?" Is what she intended to say but she couldn't make her mind form the words and force her mouth to voice them.

Kathy sighed and walked up to her. She handed Olivia a manila folder and bit the inside of her cheek.

"Elliot left, Olivia. He left the day of the shooting. He came home in a frenzy that night, said he needed to go away for a while, that he needed to think and clear his head. He packed a back, kissed the kids goodbye and left. Haven't seen him since."

Olivia was having trouble processing everything. She took a really long drag off her cigarette and pinched the bridge of her nose with her thumb and middle finger.

"He wanted to call you, Liv. I saw him with his phone before he left, he kept dialing a number and hanging up before it could even ring. I knew he was trying to get a hold of you, but something was stopping him."

When Olivia removed her hand from her face, Kathy saw the tears in her eyes.

"What's this then?" Olivia asked referring to the manila file that Kathy had handed her. She flicked her cigarette down the alley and opened the folder up.

Kathy remained silent, wanting Olivia to see for herself.

"Divorce papers?"

Kathy nodded. "Got them a few weeks ago."

"Why are you showing this to me?"

"Because, Olivia, I needed you to know you weren't the only one he left wounded. I'm actually sort of glad he didn't call you before he took off. The terror in his voice, Liv...it was frightening. He didn't sound like himself. He sounded like a scared little boy. "

Olivia could tell Kathy was holding back tears, and frankly, so was she.

"I'm here if you need me, Olivia. I know it's been almost a year, but it hurts just the same, you know?"

Olivia nodded and before she even really knew what she was doing, she opened her arms and welcomed Kathy into a tight embrace.

Kathy returned the hug. "I never hated you. I knew that you and Elliot had a work relationship, after spending so many days and hours with someone, you get attached and you develop a different kind of love towards that person. I completely understand."

Olivia pulled away with tears falling freely down her face. She didn't even really know why she was crying. She hadn't cried over him since the day Don told her he put his papers in. She got it all out of her system, and went on with her life. If he didn't need her, she sure as hell didn't need him. She figured the tears were coming from the comfort she felt with Kathy right now. And maybe, deep down, she missed Elliot more than she led on-more than she knew.

WELL OKAY. So, this story is...going to be out there, I'm just letting you know, I mean assuming you guys even want me to continue.

This is not a Kathy/Olivia story, don't even go there, LOL. I just really like Kathy and I get annoyed when people make her seem like she's a beast or something.

This is basically an Olivia based story for right now, with the SVU gang and Elliot, of course, and obviously Kathy. AND SOMEONE ELSE. :O (No, not David.)

Anyway, this story won't be that long, maybe a few chapters. You know, if you want me to continue or not. -le hint- ;)

PS) Transgression will be updated soon.