AN- you should read this fic with Sanageyama's theme playing the whole time. Wow I've written most of this fic without listening to Sanageyama's theme wtf. Time to listen to it now!

OKiies I cant believ not one puslbiksh good story like t=dis yet. Uzu SANAGeyAMA is best char and he does coo tings. First hes mecha then slimmer mecha no eyes the Wondrous EnlightenMENT.

Chapter 1: The Monkey King

So okies da Lousi was kawaii. And all her classmates summons des cool tings. The Guava summon da mole who dumb. It so weak even Guava golem can beat it lulz. KIrche sumon sum Charmander and Tabasa (lolz Jap prononce bad) sumon a Salamence. IT fly after being bagon dat cant fly.

So Lois say, "I need a slaveu! Come make me GOOD MAGE! I will show dat Harlem redhead who has best magiks."

A Saito coughed in ze Japan.

Den da powa of the Halkegenia REVivE Brimir! Brimir say, "I AM Brim-"

But he cut SHORT! An awesum songs plays- Uzu Sanageyama appear! First the drums of his theme songs are beating, then the PAUSE. Then Sanageyama take out his lightsabar (he in wondrous enlightenment and get knock into a green portal after attack RAGYO's barrier thing with a bunch of 1 stars)

UZU slahs Brimir and Brimir die cuz ZnT mages are seriously lame and weak "GRaraslGHHHHHHH" yell da Brimir, who die.

Louis 2 dumb 2 know that it was Brimir who die and go, "Oh maii gawwdd, y did I sumon les commoners faight with lame swards?!"

GUICHe say, "Hue hue hue Louis, u sumon a blnd man (Uzu get blindfold again cuz it cool and he no wanna reveal his true powah) lols, HAHAHA Aloser."

Kirche da fanserviz go like, "loolz commoner, but since u sumon ting I can do RIVALRY with Lucy moar."

Den UZU was liekkkk," Play mai them song" and theme song played. Cuz its so good

Then uh…what happens in ZnT? Oh yeah Lucy go all mad, "WHY YOU NO BE DRAGON OR GRIFON, DEY COOL."

UZU say, "Lolz sum guy in les Osaka was ALL GOLD and sumon Lobster. I beat it lulz."

Louis take out whip, AND *whipped!*

But it failed… Becuz Sanageyama SO cool SO FRESH SO SMARt and use his SHINNNNGANTSUUUUUU and avoid all da craps.

Louis go mad and blow up room with EXProsion. Sanagayama jump outat windows and okies, cuz he THREE STARS ultima Uniform.

He go back insite and Guiche go flirt with Miss Katie, da Quid ditch person. She was like all, "Oh Mister Guiche san Je suis ai ni, u so kawaii"

Guiche be like," Oui Oui Mon skin is le flawless and mon rose est tres bien! I AM GREATEST playboy!"

Den UZU was like, "U Cheater! As le capitans of the sports club I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL!"

Den Guiche and Uzu duel! Guiche sumon Giant soldier of stone. Uzu sumon GOBLIN attack force. Den Uzu use Fissure! Giant soldier dead. Goblin atck force ATTACK and GUiche lose all life points and die in da Shadow REALM.

But uh actually they go to le Vestri Court, in le France. Guiche be like, "Hue hue hue, a common sellsword like u will fall to me. I am Guiche the Bronze and GO Valkyrie!"

Da Valkryrie moved really slow and lamely and used MEGA PAWNCH! Against Uzu's BAD BOY shirt. Sanageyama go with his HUGE SMIRK fais," Go super special awesome transformation!"

Den he gets coolio transformation scene where he turn into Wondrous enlightenment form. Da golem hit supa hard and wind flew across da Vestri Court.

Sanageyama blinked.

Then he jumped 9002 feet into the air and grabbed his shinai or w/e its called and he feel POWA from da runes. Then he jump down and crush golem with his pinky.

Guiche like, "Le Impossible! How can a commoner beat my valkyrie of justice with a stick!" Being les mad GUiche sumon LOTS of golems; specifically 100 (which make him willpowa deplete lots)

Sanageyama bared his monkey fangs and go, "Men! DOU! KOTE!" with his green lightsaber.

The golems all died

"Dats AGAINST THE RULESZ," whined Guiche, wit tears in his eyes.

"Screw the rules, I have money…actually thatd be OSAKA, but yeh," say Sanageyama "MENdouKOTE!"

Den Guiche ded.

The end.

*the sanageyama theme song play again*