I think we will start with a few basics before jumping straight in. My name is Creven Calanon, and this here is my life, all of it, up to now, all written down and laid out for all to read. It twists and turns and is very far from everything being good!
First of all, I'm half Kitsune, my father is human and my mother was Kitsune, I never met her and never will unless there truly is an afterlife. During my youth I lived with my Father within a compound belonging to the Shadows, a slightly radical group of people who control those with supernatural powers and make sure they don't interfere to much with human society, the leader of which is a not too friendly subject named Adrix, a man who became my tutor, but you will find out a lot more about all of that, so here it all begins…
I awoke slowly with a slight yawn and a good long stretch, one eye open just to see how far I could reach with my paws, with the distance seeming a little greater every day. I had kept my fox form for well over a year up to this point, mainly because I simply couldn't work out how to shift back and it seemed greater fun being a fox cub, I could do more things than I would have been able to if I'd remained in the form of a human baby. At least that's what I presumed, never actually finding out, just missing the baby stage out of my life and going straight in for it as a young child, just slightly older than a toddler. Thinking back on it I'm not sure if it was a bigger shock for my Father or myself, but his look of surprise the day he walked back into our apartment and found me sat giggle on the bed is an expression I won't easily forget.
At this point I had been training with Adrix for exactly four months and the time seemed to have flown by, it only felt like I'd started learning with him yesterday, a few days ago at tops, but it really had been a few months and the knowledge I was learning was astronomical. The things I was able to do, to control with just my mind, I found amazing, then again being able to move objects across a table really is quite fantastic when you are only about four years old.
I could also do more advanced things, like reading people's emotions, working out exactly how they were feeling, which often meant sorting out the liars and the truth-tellers something with Adrix found extremely useful and as you will find out as my tale unfolds and this was something which became a form of job of mine.
We had again been working on mind control, smoothly sending objects across the table rather than sending them spinning so fast when I suddenly had a funny feeling at the tip of my tail. A form of pins and needles followed by me just sitting still looking up at Adrix and wondering what it would be like to only walk on two feet. Ignoring his words I glanced down at my paws trying to imagine hands and arms, white flesh instead of black fur.
"Creven, Creven are you actually listening to me or are your paws more interesting?" He asked while sharply clicking his fingers in front of my nose, causing me to jump slightly and look up at him quickly. "Umm, not what is going on in there?" He asked while softly tapping my nose causing me to sneeze.
Gently Adrix placed a hand under my chin and tilted my head up towards his, making direct eye contact, something which made me go a little cross-eyed to begin with before feeling the familiar presence of someone else in your mind, which is an odd sensation. It's hard to explain exactly what it feels like, basically it feels like you're being watched, that someone is following you and can hear everything you are saying and more. Allowing Adrix full access to my mind was simple as I had no way to block him to begin with, and it made it easier for him to direct me to the different parts of my mind used for my different powers.
"Well, well, well," he remarked with a small chuckle dropping his hand from my chin, "it seems a few more walls have come down up there, try concentrating on being human Creven, I reckon you'll be able to switch forms." He finished before sitting back on his ankles on his knees in front of me. Slowly I blinked once at him being able, as I always had, to understand human speech before fully closing my eyes and lying down on my front.
Wiggling slightly to get more comfortable I kept my attention and focus on what it would feel like to be human. The difference in sight, smells, touch. How I would look, my skin, hair and eyes. Through all this then pins and needles from the tip of my tail was increasing and slowly making it's way down to the base of my tail and across my back. Shivering slightly I began to feel a drop in the temperature, the floor I was lying on became less soft, the fragrance of the room lessened slightly.
"Incredible…" I heard Adrix whisper under his voice before I opened my eyes, something not feeling right with the position in which I was lying, faced own and uncomfortable. Quickly I sat up, though I'm quite sure how, I guess after watching humans I could mimic their actions straight away. Then I just sat there for a while letting Adrix wrap a small blanket over my shoulders while, flexing my fingers in front of me, taking pens, paper , anything light in weight which Adrix could find into my hands and holding them, feeling the texture for the first time, the way a human does. Drawing my first ever squiggle on a piece of paper, working out how to hold the pen correctly, with Adrix clapping and cheering the whole time.
After a couple of hours Lena knocked on the door and walked in asked, to begin with she just stood there in shock staring down at me while Adrix explained about three times that 'yes, it's really Creven.' As she walked closer I offered my arms up to her blinking a few times.
"Hello there Creven," I remember her saying softly before picking me up and holding me close, something which I only had one previous memory of, when I was much younger, looking up into the face of a woman, but also a vivid memory of the colour violet, a colour which Lena kept mentioning as she ran her soft hands through my hair.
"I think I'll let you do the honours and take him back to Corbin's, we are done here for the day." Adrix stated standing up and walking over to his desk which he sat behind and immediately reached for the log book in which he documented all of our sessions and progress together.
"Of course Sir." Lena replied with a smile before securing me, a human toddler, in a better position within her arms and started to walk out of the office and complete the short walk across the courtyard into the accommodation block and to the end towards my Father's apartment before knocking once, very strongly on the front door.
"Yes, yes come on in, it's unlocked!" I heard my father call from behind the door. Quickly I glance up at Lena from her arms and watch her take a deep breath before carefully trying to balance me in her arms while opening the door. From inside my Father smiled up at her, standing from his seat on the sofa and walking over before freezing.
"Corbin, meet Creven…human Creven." Lena began to explain before handing me over gently into my Father's arms. I giggled up at him placing one of my small hands on his chin. I still wasn't used to having actual hands instead of paws. "He turned back earlier while he was with Adrix. I'd say he's about two or three in human years, more advanced than a normal human child, way more." Lena explained while Corbin smiled down at me.
"This is amazing, a little odd too, I had gotten used to having a fox around." He replied with a slight chuckle before kissing my forehead softly. "Well Creven, you certainly have your mother's hair, the black a violet, definitely comes through from your Kitsune side. Lena, any idea how long he will stay like this?" my Father asked the young woman, a very good friend of his.
"From what I know he can turn from one form to another on his own accord," Lena explained with a smile, "At least that's what Adrix believes, so it's probably correct." She added, as they both walked across to the sofa to sit down. "He's very cute," Lena commented as I crawled off my Father's lap and on hers, a better vantage point for me to be able to make direct eye contact with my Father. It was also the first time that I had attempted to make telepathic contact with him.
"Well now that is interesting, stunning actually." Corbin commented looking down into my eyes, "I-" He stopped suddenly but kept his eyes fixed on mine as I was mentally showing him different images, things I'd done, things we'd done together. "Are you doing this Creven?" He asked pointing to his head and I nodded once.
"Corbin, what is it, what is he doing?" Lena asked, her voice full of interest. I blinked at my Father once before I turned around to face Lena and repeated the same process with her. Watching her facial expressions go from shock to a deep interest and curiosity. "Telepathy, you can do it with more people than just Adrix…with people who aren't telepathic." Lena stated and again I simply nodded once.
For the rest of that afternoon and evening I switched from Lena and my Father, showing them different images, some with small animation, mainly of my training with Adrix, things they had never seen before. I found I could also make up images, different scenes, completely new and from my imagination, Lena seemed more interested in these. So I went deeper into her mind, finding out what she liked, forest scenes seemed to have more of an emotional effect on her than anything else. Accidently I found myself drawing on images from her past, a scene from her childhood flickered into view. I froze it in view, almost like pausing a video. The scene was a simple one, a light forest clearing with small spring flowers newly in bloom open in the morning sun. A happy feeling lingered across the scene and I concentrated more on the two people sat in the centre of the clearing, a young boy and a slightly younger boy playing a card game.
"Creven stop," Lena whispered and I quickly refocused on her noticing the small tears rolling down her face, "I'm sorry, I just haven't thought about that moment in a long time." she continued as Corbin reached across to wipe the tears off her face. I wrapped my small hands around her right hand and she smiled down at me. "Actually thank you for showing me that Creven. I was ten at the time, in that clearing, the boy was my older brother, that was the last time I saw him…but his face has been slightly fuzzy, whatever you just did cleared it up, thank you, It's a memory I've always treasured and now, well it's even better." she continued as the smile on her face grew.
"I remember you mentioning him once, that you'd regretted not seeing that memory clearer." Corbin stated and Lena nodded quickly as she looked from me up to him.
"I know, Creven, I'm not sure what you just did, but it was fantastic, it actually felt like I was back there, I can remember the sounds the smells…" Lena explained and I nodded. Adrix had told me about the things I may be able to do with my mind, show people things, but not just show them, actually make people relive them, or relive them for the first time. There was even the suggestion that I would be able to make people believe that what I was showing them, my illusions which I could project into their minds was actually real - something which I developed much more in life, something which is one of my greatest powers.
"Very clever indeed." Corbin mumbled watching me yawn, "Come on, I think it's bed time for someone." he added and again I nodded feeling very tired indeed, it had been a long day. "I'll tuck him up, do you fancy making tea Lena, stay a while and have something to drink and eat?" He asked looking over at her while scooping me up into his arms.
"Of course, I'd love to." Lena replied as she stood up and walked across to the kitchen as my Father took me into the spare bedroom and lay me down in the cot he had had since moving in, just incase I had decided to turn human again, and that night I remember my first human dream.
Dreams are an odd thing to comprehend, as much as for myself as for normal human minds, but work much in the same was as my own Kitsune illusional powers do. Generally when you dream you actually perceive it as being real, tend not to notice the odd things about the dream, like not being able to remember how it actually started, this is the same as my illusions, however I am able to create the 'dream' which is why I never really dream properly as I'm always aware that it's not real, lucid dreaming some people would call this, when you have the ability to control your own dreams.
Occasionally I do experience dreams when I am not in control, and from someone in my position it is very concerning and confusing, as much to me now as it was when I was younger, they seem more to be more like prophecies and visions with meanings which, as I have experienced, do actually have actions within reality. The first of such 'dreams' is as visually clear in my mind now as it was the morning I awoke from it, but now I know its full meaning.
The dream, as I shall refer to it, started with myself standing in a dark room, completely pitch black to begin with. I remember stretching my arms out trying to feel around, they felt longer than normal, and stronger too. I pulled them back in, wrapping them around myself, my shoulders, something was definitely different, everything was bigger, I'd grown quickly somehow.
Blinking into the darkness I tried to make out something, anything and only on turning around twice did I start to notice a small pale light. As I tilted my head to the left I took a few steps towards it, the light getting bigger, brighter, with a flickering orange glow to it. I recognised it as candle light, but I wasn't sure why, my Father never used candles, no one I knew did, but it seemed familiar.
Once I reached the candle light I jumped back slightly, a face, a man appearing on the other side. I raised a hand to wave, and watched the man do the same, actually watched the face in front of me as it copied all my actions. Carefully I reached out across the top of the flame and felt cold mirrored glass, I had been looking at my own refection. I chuckled softly to myself, the sound deep and rich before leaning closer to the mirror.
I traced my hands across my face, watching my reflection do the same, noting the strong jawline, fair complexion both fairly normal and very similar to my Father. Of course it was my eyes and hair that mainly drew my attention, as they still draw everyone's attention. My eyes deep and dark, as dark as the room I was in, but with a small line of textured violet surrounding the blackness of my iris. I then moved my hands up and softly ran my fingers through my fringe, swept to the side, a standard haircut, but the colour, jet black running from my scalp but changing, merging, almost flowing and shimmering into purple, violet to be specific.
Purple a colour relating to imagination and spirituality, a colour said to stimulate the very core of the imagination itself, which inspires high ideals. Violet itself representing the future, the imagination and dreams, while being able to spiritually calm emotions. A colour which inspires and enhances psychic ability and spiritual enlightenment, also said to relate to a fantasy world, creating a feeling of a need to escape from normality, the 'daydreamer escaping from reality'.
I lowered my hand but kept my eyes on the colour, an odd feeling began to surge through me. The colour was deeply familiar and meant something in relation to what and who I was. Suddenly I became distracted by the flame in front of me suddenly flashing, taking on a violet colour of its own. The flame grew, bigger and brighter in intensity causing me to take a few steps back and shield my eyes with my arm.
As I blinked towards it I heard a noise, a sharp scream, coming from behind me, or to the side or even above I couldn't place it. Something brushed the back of my knee and I turned around quickly taking a sharp step backwards, the light around me suddenly failing, the room going black as I knocked the candle over. Glancing over my shoulder in its direction I watched the wax flow and roll across the floor, the violet gone, the substance emitting a blood red glow, gleaming from the floor.
The scream then came again, seeming from all around. On a sharp inhale of surprise I pressed my hands against my ears, while a subtle smell of iron filled my nose. The red glow grew brighter before all I could see was the red light, then a blinding flash.
When I opened my eyes it was not the red glowing room which greeted me but my Father's face looking down, concern etched across his features. And that was that, my first dream, my first glimpse into what lay ahead within life.
"Creven, Son? Is everything okay?" I heard my Father's voice ask, the concern in his face definitely coming through into his voice too. Slowly I nodded my human head and gently leant into Lena's hand as she pressed it against my forehead.
"He feels really warm Corbin." Lena remarked removing her hand and taking a step backwards, "He was fine a couple of hours ago, perfectly fine." She continued and inside I had to agree. Ignoring their conversation I replayed my dream experience over in my mind. I could, and still can, remember all of it, the colours, smells, sounds. On hearing my memories version of the screaming I shuddered suddenly, different emotions flowing so quickly and with such force.
It was only on Lena and my Father's reaction that I realised I'd somehow changed back into my fox form, their startled expressions and the slight increase in distance from which they had been standing. But that wasn't my main focus of attention, I needed to get rid of the dream, to think about something else, anything else.
For the first time I started to panic, really panic. None of it made any sense, it was genuinely scaring me. Without realising I had fully dropped my guard down on my telepathic abilities, I had the dream and my Father's and Lena's thoughts and conversation all jumping around in my mind, out of order, at different volumes.
A flash of red and the intense smell of blood came back to me and I quickly darted off the bed, jumping to the floor and tried to find the nearest thing I could to hide under. With the yells of my name from two different voices I shuffled as far back as I could underneath the bedroom wardrobe, trying to get to the far back, away from the noise and light.
"Creven, please come back out, what's wrong, show me what's wrong if you can!" Corbin exclaimed while getting down on his hands and knees to try to peer under the wardrobe to see if he could actually see me, but my black fur was working well in camouflage. "I know he's under there but I can't see him." I heard him turn and tell Lena.
"Maybe it's best to just leave him be for a little while, something's spooked him, it's an animal instinct to hide from it, which is what he's doing." Lena tried to reason with my Father, and she was actually correct, it's just a shame Corbin couldn't see that to begin with.
"He's still my Son Lena, animal instincts or not and I want to know, I may be able to help!" Corbin snapped back at her.
"Corbin I know that, but right now he's acting more fox than your Son, I doubt you've ever seen him like this before." Lena replied before walking over to the edge of the bed to lean against it.
Corbin sighed slightly before reaching a hand out towards me. In the slight darkness and my own confusion I hadn't seen his hand and jumped when I felt something touch me, my reactions acting quicker than my brain, the feel of something soft and warm breaking under my claws, then the smell of blood hit me again as the hand was pulled back with a yelp of pain from my father.
It was less than a second before I'd realised what I'd done, struck out towards my Father's hand with my claws fully extended and dug them in, ripping away at the flesh on the top of his hand. I'd never hurt him before, I'd never hurt anyone before. The world around me suddenly began to feel like it was spinning, the light at the bottom of the wardrobe was getting fainter and further away.
Slowly I managed to make my way back towards the front of the wardrobe and out into the light of the room, with a quick glance around I couldn't see anyone, but could hear Lena talking animatedly in the bathroom. I tried to make my way over to the door, my limbs feeling sluggish, unresponsive and unstable. Then there was my right paw, sticking to the carpet leaving a red paw print behind as I walked.
I don't remember much more of that day, I managed to get to the bathroom, saw Lena holding a red stained bundle of tissues against my Father's hand and the look of surprise and pain that was still in his eyes. At that point the whole world felt like it made a gigantic lurch sideways, I felt nothing, then I woke up in Adrix's office.
Adrix looked down at me with a slightly perplexed face, something which I hadn't seen before. Folding his arms he sat back down in his chair as I carefully sat up, feeling still slightly wobbly on my own four paws, no chance of being able to control my transiting back into being human.
"Well Creven, you do know how to give everyone a bit of a scare don't you…" Adrix commented his eyes fully fixed on me as I slowly nodded my head and after that he tried to explain what had happened, starting with my Father's hand, how he was okay, but would probably have a scar from my bite.
Adrix then tried to explain what he thought the dream may have been about, I didn't know how he knew exactly what I'd seen at the time but it didn't actually bother me. It was nice to have someone trying to make sense about it all, especially when they said that it probably was 'just a dream' and 'nothing to worry about.' Whether or not that was true I would just have to wait to found out.
From then on life returned to normal, I switched between human and fox every few days until I finally learnt how to control my ability and was able to change at will. I worked with Adrix basically everyday expect for the holidays, and my training as his own student became more like school to me, of course with a little extra added work from the normal teachers within the Shadows compound.
As for my father, his hand did heal, and even today you can still see scars. Corbin was gaining more and more promotions within the Shadows, becoming one of the specialists in the espionage training centre, he was also becoming highly sociable, meeting up with people every other night and of course he had his weekly 'date' nights with Lena.
Life at the Shadows remained constant and not really that interesting for many years, it was only when I was about eleven did Adrix first come to me while I was at home with my father and ask a special request. A request which changed my life and me.
(This concludes the first chapter – all of this and more can be found on my blog where I regularly post as a continuation of Creven's life and can all be found at: - Thank you for reading!)