Buck pulled the cookie sheet from the oven and set it on the counter, being especially cautious not to burn himself (again). Slipping the parchment paper with cookies stuck to it onto a cooling rack and removing the oven mitts from his hands, he breathed a sigh of relief and went about untying the apron string around his waist. So maybe he didn't actually make the cookies from scratch, he'd instead just pulled some ready made cookie dough out of the refrigerator and shaped it into cookies and baked them, but no one needed to know that. And even if they did, they could still appreciate that he had gone through this much effort just to make something edible for his boyfriend. His first few attempts at cooking hadn't gone so well, but at least he was still able to pull a win out of the night.
The door bell buzzed, and Buck smiled eagerly and headed for the front door, ready to greet Sour Cream with the proposal of netflix and pizza. What he wasn't expecting to find at the door though when he opened it though, was beside his pasty bae, there stood his younger brother, Onion, staring up into Buck's shaded eyes with the same hollow stare he shared with everyone.
"Uh." Buck wasn't sure what to say.
"I tried calling you, but you didn't answer. My mom and step-dad went out for the night last minute and told me to watch Onion. Is it okay if he chills with us?" Sour Cream asked, slouching a little, as if trying to hide himself from Buck's view. Buck looked at Onion again, who had decided regardless of Buck's answer to just let himself in, walking past the two teens and heading for presumably the kitchen. "You won't even notice him. He like, never talks. Not since, you know. The Thing." Sour Cream said, blushing. Buck shrugged, trying to push the memory back because no one needed to be traumatized twice, and that situation had been uncomfortable for all three involved.
Okay, so there would be a slight hitch in his casual-romantic night in plans, no big deal. He hooked his fingers in Sour Cream's belt loops and pulled him into a kiss, signifying that yes, it was fine, but only because he was cute. Buck gave Onion the wifi password and assumed that he'd be able to keep himself busy and so he led his boyfriend upstairs to his room, where they collapsed on Buck's bed and started netflix. "You want to watch a scary movie? They just got some new releases." Buck shuddered at the idea. Gore was not his idea of fun, too gross.
"What was that cartoon Steven was telling us about? It sounded rad, man." Sour Cream was about to answer when a loud crash downstairs caused them both to pause and Buck held his breath.
"I wonder what that was." Sour Cream pondered. There was another, smaller crash following that, and Buck wondered how much he could take before he imploded, and the night was just beginning.
"It's probably nothing, don't worry about it. How about you pick something, and I'll order the pizza?" Buck said coolly. Sour Cream nodded enthusiastically, surely about to play one of his favorite slasher films. "I'll just be a minute." Buck mumbled, deciding to check on Onion.
In the five minutes Buck had been upstairs, Onion had managed to obliterate his living room. The couch was upside down with the cushions strewn about, pillows stitched with cheesy quotes rested in the spot reserved for Bill's stamp collection books, which were nowhere to be seen. Broken glass lay next to an empty picture frame, the actual picture being in Onion's hands. Onion made direct eye contact with Buck as he tore it in half. Buck screamed internally and took a steadying breath. He knelt beside Onion, smiling at him in what he hoped appeared friendly. "Hey man, I'm gonna order pizza. You want anything? Like a pasta bowl or something?"
Onion didn't respond. Buck looked into his eyes and swore he saw a fire burning. A huge, destructive blaze. "I'll get you a small pepperoni."
True to his word and eager to get away from the creepy kid, Buck put in his and Sour Cream's usual (half pep and sausage and half mushroom) along with a small pizza for Onion. Crawling onto his bed, he snuggled up to his boyfriend and received a kiss on the temple for his troubles. As he'd expected, he was forced to watch a masked murderer chase around a group of teenagers while his boyfriend cackled until the pizzas got there, which when they did, he was almost thankful, and green with sickness.
"Oh, hey Jenny." he answered the door to see his best friend standing there with the pizzas.
"Hey sweetie, is it date night tonight?" She asked as they exchanged the food and money.
"It's supposed to be," he replied, almost bitterly.
"What's wrong?" Onion, of course, appeared then in the doorway and took the small pizza from Buck's hands and returned back to the living room to finish cutting a whole inside of the couch and remove the stuffing. "Damn, that kid gives me the creeps. Don't know why Steven talks to him." Jenny shivered, pulling her puffy black coat tighter around herself as if that could save her from the evil inside the child.
"Heh, he's not that bad." Buck lied. "Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow Jenny."
"Alright, bye now, give Sour Cream a kiss for me!"
"You okay? You've seemed really out of it tonight." Sour Cream asked, concern evident in his tone. His eyebrows were all scrunched together and his big blue eyes conveyed such sadness at the thought that something could be wrong, he was like a puppy. Buck loved puppies.
"Nah, everything's cool. I'm just distracted because I have a surprise for you."
"A surprise?" Sour Cream asked, perking up instantly. "What is it?"
"I'll go get it, wait here." Buck answered, dreading having to head back downstairs while that heathen was there, but knowing he had to get to the kitchen to get the cookies. Taking each step down, his fear of what he might find waiting for him increased. A dead body? A blood sigil? A skull filled with blood to be sipped in the glorious name of satan? Nothing was out of the question or too outrageous. What he found though was much, much worse.
Sitting on the kitchen floor, Onion had an empty pint of ice cream and chocolate smeared around the corners of his mouth. In his hand, the last chocolate chip cookie.
"With every passing day, we move further away from God's light." Onion said as he shoved the last cookie in his mouth.
Okay, so he didn't actually say, that, because he never says anything (not since The Thing), but wouldn't that be fucked up? Buck thought so. Buck couldn't even think, he was just so frustrated and angry and he wanted to cry a little, if he was being honest. He wasn't sure how long he'd been locked in a staring match with Onion, but he guessed that curiosity had gotten the better of Sour Cream, because then he joined his boyfriend in the doorway of the kitchen.
"Am I interrupting something?" Sour Cream asked, placing a hand tentatively on Buck's shoulder. Buck would have liked to be able to keep his cool guy shtick up, but he was at his breaking point with this kid. He ushered Sour Cream into the next room and politely asked him what the fuck was wrong with his little brother. "Well, I turned out fine, so it's not anything on my mom's side of the family." was Sour Cream's brilliant response. Buck wanted to tear his well managed and perfect hair out, but instead he took a deep breath and asked Sour Cream to call his mom and have her pick Onion up.
It was with a strange sense of victory that Buck watched from his front door as Onion headed for his mom's car. When they were out of sight, he turned and happily attacked Sour Cream's neck with kisses, ready to forget how bad the night had been going. Not that he'd mention it to anybody, but lying in bed, sweat covered and enjoying his post orgasm haze, with Sour Cream cuddling his side, snoring softly, Buck could swear he could see two glowing hollow eyes outside his bedroom window. But then again, he couldn't be sure.
A.N.: i wish i cared that this fic was a piece of shit, but i dont. not even a little bit. this was written entirely for my bff and it was supposed to be sourbuck, but this is what it turned into. oops.