DISCLAIMER: Kuroshitsuji and all canon characters belong to Toboso Yana. The rest belongs to me.

WARNINGS: Though it was not my intention, certain aspects of this story can be taken as shounen-ai/slash, so be warned. Also, this contains major spoilers for the ending of the Kuroshitsuji anime ending (season 1), so if you don't want to be spoiled, do click the back button.

A/N: I don't know what crack I was on when I wrote this or where the hell the plot bunny came from, but I just simply had to get it out of my system. Since I haven't read many Kuroshitsuji fics yet, I don't know if the main idea here is a cliche or not, but it's possible. Also, my first fanfic for this fandom, so yeah! Go me! xD Hope you guys enjoy it.

CURIOSITY

'Will it hurt?'

The question had slipped from his mouth before he could prevent it, but Ciel Phantomhive could not bring himself to feel the humiliation that would have assaulted him had the circumstances been different. Before that day, he would have considered it cowardly and childish to ask such a question, but now – standing at death's inviting doorway and literally offering up his soul to the devil on a metaphorical silver platter – his walls had begun to crumble, revealing the child within. He fingered the black patch over his right eye, refusing to meet the intense gaze of the disguised demon who was watching his young master silently.

'Yes, a little,' came the reply at length.

Ciel almost jerked his head up in shock. The deep voice that had answered had a strange tenor to it. It was still smooth and cultured like it had always been, but there was also an underlying gentleness that had seemed soothing, almost comforting; something Ciel had never heard from his butler before. He was still processing that in his mind when the demon continued in that same placid tone,

'But I shall try to keep it as gentle as possible.'

His words were as surprising as his tone, but Ciel only spared them a moment's consideration before interjecting with a sharp, 'Don't.'

The young teenager finally raised his head and met the dull crimson eyes of Sebastian Michaelis squarely.

'Make it as painful as you can,' he ordered authoritatively, voice full of callous determination. With an inward sigh, he closed his eyes for a brief moment. 'Carve the pain of my life into my soul.'

A flicker of surprise flitted across Sebastian's handsome features at the unexpected command. But then his lips curled up in a small understanding smile and, dropping onto one knee in a subservient bow, he placed his hand upon his chest and answered, 'Yes, my lord.' It was the last time he would ever utter those signature words to the young Phantomhive.

Wearily, Ciel leaned back in the stone bench, sighing. Sebastian rose from his position and easily pulled off the white glove on his hand with his teeth, dropping it unceremoniously onto the ground. His young master watched calmly as he approached the boy, dark red eyes scrutinising him thoughtfully.

Still so young, the demon mused to himself as he leaned down to gaze into the single sapphire eye that did not so much as blink as it returned his stare. With a tenderness that complemented his earlier tone, he caressed Ciel's face with his remaining hand, tracing a line down his cheek and up again. He felt the boy shiver slightly at the feel of his cool fingers and the black nails that lightly scraped against the soft skin.

Too young to be a man. Yet too mature to be a child.

Without a doubt, this small human was the most intriguing of his kind that Sebastian had had the fortune of coming across. Not only did his mindset run along a different tangent as most others, but even the essence of his soul was incredibly diverse from the other frivolous human beings. Sebastian could smell it even now; he could already taste its acrid tang that permeated the air surrounding the boy. Full of negativity, hatred, anger, suffering, bitterness ... and pain. Oh, such pain! There was not much to accomplish by making the consumption of that tempting soul as agonizing as possible, like he had been ordered to. Ciel's pain and suffering were already etched into his dark spirit, engraved so deeply that salvation was beyond him now.

However, underneath it all, there was another taste that did not blend in with the rest: a childlike innocence entwined with a sliver of compassion that, despite everything, could not be stolen or repressed. Riveted by this new revelation, Sebastian moved his palm across the boyish face and smoothly removed the eye patch, exposing Ciel's pentagon-bearing violet eye. His young master barely moved, simply allowing the demon to flick away the small black cloth and then card his slim fingers in the dark grey hair in a caress before breaking the contact.

Sebastian could now see the innocence of Ciel's soul clearly on his features. Though the boy was still expressionless, he had never seen the former Earl looking so vulnerable, so small, so ... young. It had been carefully concealed for all those years by a stoic mask and spoilt attitude, but that small slice of purity had always been there. He could see that it was a deep-rooted quality that belonged to Ciel Phantomhive, and that innocence only made his soul so much more sweeter, so much more fouler.

Pure intoxication. Sebastian inhaled deeply, revelling in the tantalising appetizer of the grand banquet that was awaiting him. He had been right to wait so long to feast upon this particular soul. None other could ever compare.

The perpetual thirst at the back of his throat began to burn. With a smile of anticipation, the demon began to lean closer, his red eyes shimmering to life and glowing crimson as his demonic side began to manifest. How he had desired for this! And at last, the moment had finally come...

'Sebastian.'

He froze immediately. For an instant, a fleeting look of irritation diffused across his face at being interrupted, but then his expression became neutral again and his eyes returned to their previous colour.

'What is it?'

'Just ... just wait.' There was an unmistakeable touch of hesitation and uncertainty in the young boy's voice.

Sebastian narrowed his eyes slightly. 'Are you going back on your word now, young master?' His tone was smooth and mild, yet it contained a barely audible hint of a warning.

Ciel's eyes visibly hardened at the demon's quiet accusation.

'I keep the promises and bargains that I make, Sebastian! Do not associate me with those corrupt bastards that perjure themselves for their vulgar gains! I merely wanted to –' He stopped speaking abruptly and lowered his eyes, looking indecisive once more. Through the gloom, Sebastian plainly saw the light pink tinge that dusted the youth's cheeks.

The butler raised an eyebrow. His consuming hunger was still fervent, but his contractor's strange and uncharacteristic behaviour that had immediately ensnared his interest was a more pressing matter. Lowering onto one knee again, Sebastian propped a long finger under the youngster's chin and coaxed him to look up.

'Young master?'

Ciel met his questioning stare reluctantly. A few moments passed in which his mismatched eyes betrayed his mental vacillation, but finally the grey-haired youth came to a verdict.

'What's left of my soul is yours to take, Sebastian,' Ciel told him bleakly. 'I do intend to keep my part of our bargain. However, I've decided that before I die, there is one more thing I want, and since you are the only one here, it is of you that I ask it.'

Ask. Not order. Not demand. Sebastian hid a smirk, genuinely amused by the situation. So the little brat had truly realised that, in spite of his companion's polite and compliant demeanour, he was no longer the king in charge. Though, admittedly, it was a little surprising how seemingly fast the boy had come to terms with their positions being reversed.

'And what favour would the young master ask of his loyal servant?' The black-clad butler enquired levelly in the same obedient, debonair manner with which he had always addressed Ciel. For all that anyone might have guessed, he could have been a demon still bound to the Phantomhive's will.

Ciel hesitated, blinking, and then slowly leaned closer. For a moment, Sebastian assumed that his contractor wanted to whisper the request in his ear for some unfounded reason, but that notion was quickly and effectively destroyed when Ciel, instead of bringing his lips to the demon's ear, boldly brought them to Sebastian's mouth, initiating a soft contact.

In that moment, had Ciel Phantomhive kept his eyes open, he would have witnessed an infantile dream of his coming true: the ever-composed and suave demonic butler completely caught off guard. Sebastian's eyes were filled with blatant shock and surprise. He stared at the too proximate face of the Phantomhive, who himself had frozen up before he tentatively began to move his mouth over the unresponsive lips of his companion.

It took a considerable amount of time for the demon to compose himself again, and within that time, Ciel experimentally deepened the kiss, growing bolder and more confident with each passing second. The butler was left to ponder the sudden turn of events. His former master had always done things beyond his expectation, from the amusingly trivial to the truly impressive. But of everything, this kiss was certainly the most unprecedented. Not only had such a gesture never crossed the demon's mind, but he could see no motive behind it either.

Right then, the boy ran a hand through Sebastian's sleek hair, uncertainly fumbling with the black locks. The touch jolted him firmly to the present and he realised that Ciel's actions – of both his hands and lips – had grown noticeably more untoward. Yet, there still lingered a chaste innocence behind them which held a strange charm that he could not explain. Ciel wound his fingers through Sebastian's hair again, and after a pause, the demon gently returned the kiss, raising his hand to caress the boyish face again. Though the boy had not asked him to, he could tell that Ciel wanted him to reciprocate.

The contact lasted only a few more seconds, and then Ciel pulled away, removing his hand from the butler's now mussed hair. Sebastian remained on one knee in front of him, face inscrutable and eyes neutral. Ciel returned his look with near-perfect self control as he leaned back on the stone bench. Only the light flush on his face and the hard breathing gave him away.

When the youth refused to initiate conversation, Sebastian asked with enviable nonchalance, 'May I ask why the young master asked such a ... favour of me?'

The smile that crossed Ciel's face then was mirthless and bitter, and his voice was utterly indifferent as he answered, 'Curiosity.'

A small frown marred Sebastian's handsome face, but Ciel turned away resolutely. He would not explain it to the butler. He found it shameful and degrading to ponder on it himself even. Right then, for a tiny second, Ciel wondered if he regretted doing what he had done, though once he had so passionately insisted that he would never regret any of his actions.

But I showed a weakness.

He grimaced inwardly, cursing the sudden and unwonted memories that had first flooded his mind when Sebastian had attempted to take his soul earlier. His hands balled into fists. He should never have allowed himself to remember anything of the past! Memories of parents, family, smiles, happiness, carefree laughter ... Why had he permitted himself that small indulgence? Because of his impending death? Because recalling a past life he had shut away would no longer matter?

There was no answer. What mattered was that he had let those remembrances come forth, and with them came those unusual moments of life that would last in a person's subconscious forever, always waiting to burst out. And it was the recollection of such one unusual moment that had led Ciel Phantomhive to advance on Sebastian Michaelis in a manner he had never considered before...

'Ciel! Come look! See, Aunt Rachel and Uncle Vincent. What are they doi –?'

'Oh, yuck! Lizzy, don't spy, get away from the door –!'

'Ooh, they're kissing! Like Mama and Papa did once! Kawaii, ne!!'

'Eww. It's not cute, it's gross. Lizzy, let's go!'

'Ne, ne, Ciel. Mama said we'll get married too someday. Must we kiss then?'

'Don't say such gross things! I won't marry you if you kiss me –!'

He silenced the echoes of his seven year old self. Such an irrelevant memory, really. So pointless, it held no true significance. But still, it, along with so many others, had forever lingered in the dark recesses of his mind where he had locked them away, scratching at the figurative locked door, begging to be let out again.

They were the key to something beautiful that had once existed and perhaps that was why they had never completely faded away, but he had ignored them for all these years. After all, it was a life that had been stolen from him, one he could never regain no matter how hard he tried. There was no point in reminiscing about lost happiness that had been so superficial, so meaningless, just like that particular memory. And yet, as soon as he had revisited it only minutes before, he had lost himself, to his shame.

His younger naive self, like any self-respecting child, had not relished the thought of physical contact with the opposite sex, but the Ciel that existed now – right when Sebastian had moved forward to claim his soul and the old recollections had welled up, especially that one certain memory – he had questioned himself, What might have it been like to be close to someone? Do I want to die without ever knowing?

He shuddered to think of it now. The Ciel Phantomhive the world at present knew would have never ever thought such a...! But the fact still remained that he had.

Why is that? Did he still retain a fragment of the person he might have been? Was it that wasted person, who had no place in the new darker life Ciel had led until now, that had asked him that abominable question?

And he, unbelievably, had truly considered it! He had remembered a worthless memory, contemplated a worthless question and shamelessly acted upon a rash decision. And so, what did that make that kiss? An equally worthless experience he should never have engaged in?

So many questions and no answers, but what bothered Ciel the most was that in his hasty choice to acquire a kiss – or more accurately, intimacy – before his death, he had revealed a great weakness, not only to a demon, but to himself as well: he had not been the man to always move forward no matter what, like he had always claimed. He had made the mistake of looking back; to the past, to a wistful longing that belonged to a past self that had no present and no future, and to something he should not want anymore. He had looked back, and through that kiss, he had revealed that weakness.

Ciel inwardly cursed himself. There was no point in crying over spilt milk now, no use in regretting what he had done, but the mortification he felt was overwhelming. And on top of that, he had to wonder, had he gained anything by kissing a demon?

Still ignoring Sebastian, who had not removed his eyes from Ciel even once, the boy self-consciously licked his lips. There was no savour, no trace, yet he fancied he could feel an aftertaste: sweet, addicting and wonderfully sinful, because, after all, it had been with a devil destined for Hell. And now Ciel knew the answer to his question and it had been far from unpleasant, but...

'Was it worth it, young master?'

With a start, he whipped his head round at the unexpected question. Sebastian, still on one knee and watching him keenly with his piercing eyes, raised an elegant eyebrow, prompting the boy to answer. Ciel did not oblige, but he was still unsettled from Sebastian's words. It was almost as if he had known what Ciel had been thinking. Then again, that would hardly be a surprise.

When no response was made, Sebastian chuckled softly, a strange gleam in his crimson eyes. 'Oh my, it appears that the young master has much on his mind after that special favour.'

Ciel simply ignored that comment as well. He owed Sebastian no explanations and he would not give any. Nor did he want to contemplate what had taken place anymore. Enough time had been spent on a flimsy last wish and useless regrets. Now, all Ciel wanted was to finish the game.

He looked at Sebastian. The demon was wearing a tiny knowing smile on his face, and his eyes danced with quiet laughter. Obviously, Ciel's discomfort after the kiss had been apparent and Sebastian, as was his wont, had found those moments entertaining.

When he continued to smirk casually, Ciel snapped, 'Well, what are you waiting for?'

'Oh. Was that favour all you wanted from me then, young master? Shall I continue with my part?' Sebastian asked light-heartedly, still smiling.

The young boy fixed him with a cold, blank look that only made the demon's grin wider. Another deep chuckle followed. 'A simple kiss was all that you desired, was it?'

'What objection do you have to that?' Ciel asked coolly in a low, level voice.

'No objections at all, young master,' Sebastian replied with an indulgent smile. His eyes glinted mischievously. 'But as it so happens, if a kiss was what you wanted, asking for one was hardly necessary. You would have received quite a "kiss", favour or not.'

At first, Ciel could not grasp the meaning of his words. Confused, he opened his mouth to demand an explanation, but upon seeing the deviously charming smile upon Sebastian's face, he understood immediately. Taking a deep breath, he looked wearily at the demon.

'Just do it then.'

Sebastian's grin broadened, but this time, the gentleness Ciel had initially heard in his voice seemed to have passed into his soft smile. His cool fingers stroked his cheek again as he leaned towards the small boy. Ciel did not flinch as his death approached. The crimson eyes were alive and shimmering again, the pupils contracting into cat-like slits. He met their gaze unblinkingly and allowed Sebastian's mouth to come down on his lips and part them without any resistance.

For a split second, it was a simple kiss. But then, like a serrated whip that cleaved his flesh from bone, came the excruciating agony as the demon hungrily began to devour his soul, staying true to his word and inflicting as much pain as was possible. Ciel's body screamed from the torture, but his spirit revelled in it. This was what he had wanted.

'Was it worth it, young master?'

As his life was rapidly drained from his being, Ciel momentarily thought of the contract he had made with the demon, the dark life he had led, the murders he had brought about, the vengeance he had sought and, finally – in a moment of weakness to grasp at a thread that bound him to an old life – the kiss he had shared with Sebastian. Did he regret them still?

... No.

Yes, it was worth it.

Ciel Phantomhive welcomed death with open arms.

END

A/N: This is what happens when I watch too many episodes of an anime that is overly abundant in fanservice moments in one go, and dream up a fanfic at two in the morning. Really not good for health. (And it ate up a lot of time I should have spent studying :P) But I hope it was OK for my first dip into this fandom.

Also, despite the shounen-ai factors in this fic (does it really count as slash though? I didn't involve any romantic feelings despite those scenes), my real intention was to portray a vulnerable and human side of Ciel before he dies. It just so happened that I wanted Sebastian as a candidate to achieve that in preference to all the other characters. ;) I hope I didn't mess up.

Anyway, please leave a review and let me know what you think! Concrit will also be much appreciated! :D