fandom: supernatural
pairing: destiel
warnings: none for now, no spoilers either. amnesia!Cas.
There are flashlights moving all around, until the whole world turns white. Sounds remain, though - people screaming, loud voices calming them down; sirens, more shouting. Then a hoarse, low whisper, saying "it's gonna be alright, Cas. I'm gonna make it all right." The voice fades a little by the end of the sentence, but Castiel's sore brain believes it anyway. He realizes his eyes have been opened all along, when his muscles get too tired and loosen shutting his eyelids and making the world turn black. After that all he remembers is floating in a void. Sometimes a soothing voice from before keeps him company. The words it says vary from angry through desperate to loving. But whatever they are, whatever they mean, they keep Castiel from drowning. And he is grateful.
He can't really tell the time flowing, but he has a feeling it's been a while. By then he thinks of the Voice as his friend. He can't respond, but the Voice doesn't seem to mind all too much, it just keeps going by itself.
That is until one time it has a request. The Voice sounds so desperate, so hopeless, that Castiel can't help but try and fulfill it. The more he fails, the harder he tries. After countless attempts, he manages to do what he was asked to and his eyes snap open.
Out of all the white Castiel is surrounded by, the dark silhouette comes out. The world seems to be mute, but then he starts to regain his senses, eyes finally telling colors apart and ears recognizing sounds. And there are plenty. The most overwhelming, though, is a voice. A familiar voice. His friend - the Voice. Except now it has a face. A freckled face with worried green eyes and rich lips. Castiel blinks. He doesn't know much about the world, if anything at all, but he's pretty sure people shouldn't look so devastatingly beautiful. He swallows, and the realization hits him - he has a voice of his own now. He can actually respond to his friend. So he does. Or rather - he tries. What comes out of his mouth are some inarticulate mix of coughs and syllables. Stubborn as he is, Castiel tries again.
What eventually comes out of his mouth is 'pretty.' The word is choked up, but clear to recognition.
The man furrows his brow and his gleeful "Cas!" turns into more questioning "uh, Cas?" His expression doesn't last long, not in Castiel's vision anyway - the man is shoved over by a couple of while-clothed people. There are all over him now, checking the tubes coming out of his body.
A steady fast beeping spreads across the room - it's Castiel's increasing heart rate. He hisses when blood pumped through his temples. His whole body is hurting and he wants to come back to the time where there was only he and his friend the Voice. His eyes close again, as he drifts off into blissful unconsciousness.
The next time he wakes up colors aren't so bright and he doesn't hear the sounds like the world's underwater. Everything still smells like at the drycleaner's though, just less condensed.
Castiel feels the warmth spreading over his hand. He shoots a glance only to realize it's covered with someone else's. As an extention to the hand, there's an arm, a neck, and finally a face. The one from before. Although Castiel's head's not pounding anymore, he hears beeping that indicates his heart's speeding up.
A sudden change of sound frequency wakes the man beside the bed. His eyes flutter open – wary, prepared. He looks around, ready to react to whatever's happening. Except, nothing is happening. Nothing bad anyway. After all, Cas is eventually awake.
The man's hand let go of his only to wrap both his arms around him in a tight hug. Castiel feels something wet on his shoulder, and he realizes the man's crying. Barely - just a couple of tears - but nevertheless.
Castiel's brain is working on full force now, but he doesn't get it. "Did I upset you?"
The man unlatches himself from his body and frowns, confused. His eyes are a little bit red, but otherwise nothing gives away the tears he shed. "No. Why?"
Castiel narrows his eyes and tilts his head a bit as if trying to see from a different direction, different point of view. It doesn't work - he's still baffled. "You were crying." It's a statement, but there's a question hanging behind it.
Very light shade of red creeps over the man's cheeks. He shifts uncomfortably and rubs a hand over the back of his neck. His gaze travels from staring into Castiel's eyes to looking somewhere over his right ear. "I was relieved," he says, sounding slightly embarrassed.
"Oh," Castiel still doesn't understand, but he lets it go. There are more important things to be taken care of. "Could you at least tell me who are you then?" he asks politely, because he's sure the person he indentifies as 'the Voice' probably has a name to go by.
The man's body freezes, and shock paints over his face. "You don't.." he backs away, barely half an inch, but Castiel notices. "You don't remember?" he stares right at him with hurt in he's eyes. Seeing that expression, Castiel knows he would give everything not to have forgotten whatever he didn't remember. However, that's not how the universe works. His head, his memories, is a blank.
"I'm sorry," he says breaking off their mutual 'who can pierce a soul with staring' contest. He just can't take the wave of sorrow radiating from his companion.
Seconds pass, the broken look on the man's face turns into empty gaze, like he put all his feelings behind a wall. "Dean," he swallows heavily. "My name's Dean Winchester," he sounds dried out of emotion with just a hint of bitterness.
Castiel knows he's not gonna like what comes next.
A/N: tell me what you think. Is there something you'd change? please, give me some criticism/feedback.
also note that it is not a finished fic, but I just really wanted to know someone's opinion before I go on.
(working title taken from a song by Explosions in the Sky)