If you haven't read the previous stories, all I can say is GO TO OUR PAGE AND READ THE 1st AND 2ND INSTALLMENTS =D
To the rest of you, welcome back!
There's a good chance I'm more excited to write this than you are to read it. Don't panic, comedy shall be brought back (well I'll try) - because reviews where people say they laugh are much better than reviews where I'm informed that computers have actually been jigged on. And I'm also watching out for people giving me menacing glares like this :/ (That completely cracked me up). So I'll spend this story trying to redeem myself!!
Clearly, they've never been to Singapore
Katy and Alex were certain they were heading to the third movie – they'd made the phone call, the third DVD was in, and after the credits, everything had gone dark...
Gradually they heard something familiar. Elizabeth eerily, but kind of flatly singing:
"The bell has been raised from its watery grave... do you hear its sepulchral tone? A call to all, pay head the squall and turn your sails toward home. Yo ho, hail together. Hoist the colours high. Heave-ho..."
"OWW!" Katy, of course, screamed loud enough to disrupt the entirety of Singapore's quiet streets. She and Alex had literally been dumped in a corner, behind some steps leading to the canal.
"What was that?" foreign voices were asking each other.
Alex looked at Katy in the faint light, mouthing "shut up". They still had no idea where they were.
"A dangerous song to be singing," they heard somebody say, not so far away. "For any who are ignorant of its meaning. Particularly a woman. Particularly a woman alone."
"What makes you think she's alone?" They heard Barbossa walk down the stone steps just behind them.
Katy and Alex sighed in relief and stopped cowering away in fear.
"You protect her?" the random guy said.
"What makes you think I need protecting?" Elizabeth's knife was immediately at his throat. Her eyes met Alex's, who lead Katy out of the shadows. "You're actually here!"
"Your master's expecting us. And an unexpected death would cast a slight pall..." Barbossa trailed off at the sight of the two familiar girls.
"Yes. We're back," Katy smiled.
"And we didn't get lost," added Alex. "Which is a miracle in itself."
Barbs eyes widened as he went to look around in the dead-end where they'd appeared from. "How in the blazes did you get here?"
Katy shrugged. "I'm guessing in more or less the same way we left Tia Dalma's."
"We're making sure you get Hazel back," Alex said purposefully.
Katy took a deep breath. "If she hasn't died already..."
They were suddenly all hushed and signalled to hide. Uniformed soldiers were marching about, occupying the main streets, so the Singaporean pirates lead them down the more inconspicuous, shadowy backstreets.
"Elizabeth," Barbs began as they walked. "Arm them," he gestured to Alex and Katy.
"Yeah. We know how many flipping weapons you're carrying right now," Katy said, rolling her eyes.
"But every single one of them will be taken off us," reminded Alex. "There's hardly any point."
"We'll just see about that..." Elizabeth replied petulantly, reaching into her coat and shoving a pistol into each of their hands.
It was a long walk to wherever this Sao Feng guy was, and Katy decided she needed to talk sensibly about what had happened before, and that's a big deal because Katy is rarely sensible. "Alex..."
Alex braced. She knew that tone.
"Want to try and talk about what happened, or...?" Katy asked nervously.
"You're exhausting what's left of my sanity." Alex bit her lip. "Wait until I can think clearly, will you?"
Katy held up her palms, not wanting to argue all over again. As the group got closer to the bathhouse, Elizabeth started questioning Barbs about news from her dear Turnip.
Then something sparked in Alex's head. "Where the heck are Nick, Joe and Kevin?"
Katy thought for a minute. Just like her and Alex, the brothers would have had to ring somebody whilst floating around in the credits, to get the next dvd in. "...Maybe they didn't want to come."
"What?" gasped Alex. It was now her primary instinct to rectify all that had gone so wrong... and that included the absentees. "We need to fix things here! You said so yourself!"
Katy just shrugged, looking let down, thinking of Nick. "They obviously don't share that enthusiasm."
Alex couldn't think of anything to say.
They soon arrived at an obscure, round door, and were beckoned inside. The place was very well guarded, and everyone was made to part with their weapons.
Alex immediately handed over the pistol, knowing it was pointless to even try to keep it, whilst Elizabeth glared at her for giving up so easily. However, Katy was more daring and stepped forward, keeping her gun hidden.
One of Sao Feng's men stopped her. "Do you think because she is a woman we would not suspect her of treachery?"
"When you put it that way..." Barbossa said carefully.
Katy sighed and pulled out her gun. "Fine, but she's your main problem," she grumbled, pointing at Elizabeth.
Elizabeth did her best little innocent expression, trying to look like a bloody Governor's daughter again.
"Remove. Please," smiled the guard.
Elizabeth huffed and threw off her coat, revealing a harness carrying several more guns, even a grenade. Barbossa just shrugged innocently on her behalf, trying to convince the suspicious men that it was all in good spirits.
And as if that wasn't enough, Elizabeth then produced a beast of a gun from her boot - this thing was like a flipping rocket launcher. Barbossa was genuinely confused as he tried to figure out where she'd been hiding that.
Now that everyone was convinced Elizabeth was actually producing these things, she was made to change into a small robe which would hide nothing. And as if that wasn't enough, Elizabeth had apparently put a black mark against every female's name... which included Katy and Alex. This era was sexist indeed.
After she changed, Alex complained right away, pulling the fabric down to try and cover her legs. "I hate this."
"Oh, gasp! Bare ankles!" Katy exclaimed sarcastically. "Even Elizabeth's not complaining."
"And bare calves," Alex rambled on. "And bare knees. And-"
"Stop it! Don't remind all the pervy men," Katy's eyes darted around the room.
It was quite nerve-racking for all three girls as they made their way through the bathhouse. Everybody was staring at them as they walked further inside... and they had absolutely nothing to defend themselves with.
Eventually, they reached Sao Feng. Barbossa presented himself with a ridiculously gracious bow, and gestured for the rest of them to copy him. Elizabeth, Katy and Alex gave a sort of half-hearted bob and had done with it.
"Captain Barbossa, welcome to Singapore." Sao Feng then asked one of the twins beside him for more steam. Pretty sure he puts some sort of addictive substance in that stuff..."I understand you have a request to make of me."
Barbs was careful about how he worded this. "More of a proposal to put to ye. I've a venture underway, and I find myself in need of a ship and a crew."
"Hmmm." Feng scratched his head with fingernails that really needed some work done. "It's an odd coincidence."
"Because you happen to have a ship and a crew you don't need?" Elizabeth butted in.
"No," Sao Feng replied. "Because earlier this day, not far from here, a thief broke into my most revered uncle's temple and tried to make off with these." He picked up the charts.
They were trying to hide it, but Barbossa and Elizabeth were both kicking themselves. Stupid Will.
"The navigational charts. The route to the farthest gate," Sao continued. "Wouldn't it be amazing if this venture of yours took you to a world beyond this one?"
"It would strain credulity at that," replied Katy. She was both surprised that she'd memorized those words and satisfied with the impressed and confusing looks she'd received in return. Line stealing never got old.
Barbossa glared at Katy, a look that was quite terrifying. He obviously needed everything to go exactly to plan... and it wasn't.
Sao Feng stared at all of them carefully, then with a quick nod signalled over to a couple of his men standing over a bath of some sort, for the thief to be revealed.
Now, a couple of few things were odd about this. One, Will had not actually drowned in all that time he spent underwater and two, he wasn't alone...
Alex and Katy struggled to contain their shock.
Poor Turnip nearly choked inhaling some oxygen again, and tied by the wrist to the piece of wood, there were three other wheezing sets of lungs...
Yes, of course it was Nick, Joe and Kevin. All of them looking around the place timidly, still coughing up water.
"This one is the thief... Sao said walking over, poking at Will. "Where did they come from?" he quietly asked his men.
Barbossa and Elizabeth glanced at each other apprehensively whilst the brothers made awkward eye contact with Katy and Alex.
"Are any of their faces familiar to you?" Sao Feng asked, still a bit confused.
The pose shook their heads.
"Then I guess..." Sao produced a sharp spike. "He has no further need for it," he said, going to kill Will.
Elizabeth couldn't hide her dismay and gasped loudly.
Sao moved away from Will and eyed all of them suspiciously. "You come into my city, you betray my hospitality..."
"Sao Feng, I assure you," began Barbossa. "I had no idea-"
"That he would get caught!"
As Sao Feng raised his voice, all manner of his bitches, so to speak, appeared. Alex edged closer and Katy started giving them all death glares.
"You intend to attempt a voyage to Davy Jones' locker and I cannot help but wonder... why?"
"To get Hazel!" Alex muttered to Katy quietly.
At this, Barbossa rather neatly and skilfully tossed Sao a coin. "The song has been sung. The time is upon us. We must convene the Brethren Court. As one of the nine pirate lords, you must honour the call."
While he said all that, Katy mouthed to Nick and his brothers "Are you okay?" All she got in return were weak nods.
"More stem," Sao Feng said quietly. Which resulted in nothing happening, so he tried again. "More stem!"
Katy and Alex remembered that the crew were below controlling the stem, and more importantly the swords which would soon come shooting through the floor.
"There is a price on all of our heads, it is true..." Sao said pensively. "Since the only way a pirate can turn a profit anymore is by betraying other pirates."
"It be time to put our differences aside," insisted Barbs. "The first Brethren Court gave us rule of the seas, but now that rule is being challenged by Lord Cutler Beckett."
"Against the East India Trading Company, what value is the Brethren Court? What can any of us do?"
Elizabeth was looking sulky as per usual. "You can fight!" She stormed forwards, brushing off somebody pulling her back. "Get off me! You are Sao Feng, the pirate lord of Singapore. You command in an age of piracy where bold captains sail free waters. Were waves aren't measured in feet, but as increments of fear, and those who pass the test become legend."
"For goodness sakes, she needs to shut up..." Alex looked around as Elizabeth was being looked at with extreme annoyance by several dozen angry pirates.
"Would you have that era come to an end on your watch?" continued Lizzie on. "The most notorious pirates from around the world are uniting against our enemy, and yet you sit here cowering in your bathwater!"
Elizabeth realised she'd gone a tad far and took a few steps back as she was stared down on by Sao Feng. "Elizabeth Swann. There is more to you than meets the eye, isn't there?" he asked. "And the eye does not go wanting..."
That was enough to provoke some irate struggling from Turnip.
"But I cannot help but notice you have failed to answer my question," he gestured to Barbossa. "What is it you seek in Davy Jones' locker?"
"Jack Sparrow," replied Will, resolute.
Stupid Turnip couldn't just keep quiet for a few more minutes. Katy and Alex sighed at him, and the two twins hid a giggle, clearly they had a brush or two with Jack in the past.
"He's one of the pirate lords," continued Will.
"Oh, big wow for working that one out!" Katy told him sarcastically.
"The only reason I would want Jack Sparrow returned from the land of the dead is so I could send him back myself!" Well, clearly Sao had issues, kicking over a few bits and pieces as he spoke spitefully.
"That's why we would have been better having not mentioned his name," Joe muttered to Will.
"Actually, we need to get our friend back from the locker as well, and you needn't worry because you haven't even met her..." Alex rambled, not comfortable in the hostile atmosphere.
"Why would she matter..." Sao was still facing away from them.
Barbossa gave Alex a warning look before walking over to Sao Feng. "The girl has powerful attributes that may prove useful to the Brethren..."
Katy and Alex looked at each other with raised eyebrows but were too afraid to speak again. Was Barbossa lying? Or did he want to use their future-reading abilities for his own good?
"And as for Jack Sparrow? He holds one of the nine pieces of eight," Barbs continued. "He failed to pass it along to a successor before he died, so we must go and get him back."
Sao had probably stopped listening. He was watching the ink on a man's back run – a fake tattoo. "So you admit you have deceived me. Weapons!"
Suddenly, screaming, armed men jumped out and surrounded Barbossa and the girls. As if they needed weapons – there was probably a hundred of them against four. Not including the other four, Will and the brothers, who were already tied up.
Barbossa held out his arms honestly. "Sao Feng, I assure you our intentions are strictly honourable."
And that was the exact moment when swords came flying out from beneath them. Even Katy and Alex found themselves with a pair each.
Barbie's 'strictly honourable' intentions were looking pretty suspicious now.
"Thanks, Gibbs!" Katy called down to the floor. "What? It's too late to pretend they aren't there now."
"Drop your weapons, or I kill the man!" Sao Feng threatened the spy.
"Kill him, he's not our man," Barbossa replied dismissively.
"If he's not with you, and he's not with us... who's he with?" Turnip stated the obvious yet again.
As if to answer Will's question, the East India Trading Company bombarded the place, turning it into complete chaos - and the swords all the pirates had weren't much use against the guns.
Katy and Alex promptly ran. They cut Nick, Joe and Kevin lose, letting Will attack people still tied up to the piece of wood, and with four cutlasses between the five of them, they stayed close to Barbossa and Elizabeth, and attempted to escape the place with their lives intact.
Which was easier said than done.
A few explosions (again, thanks to Gibbs and the crew from under the bathhouse) relieved matters slightly. But they were followed out onto the main streets, and the girls and brothers, worrying, had to defend themselves a few times. That, and Katy's ear-splitting screaming seemed enough to keep any stupid solders away. In no time at all, Singapore (and its large supply of fireworks) were in flames...
At least the fireworks were pretty. Eventually, everyone met up with Will.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Katy asked Nick again.
"Nearly drowned, but apparently we're still alive," Nick replied. With just a hint of spite...
"You have the charts?" Barbossa asked incredulously.
"And better yet, a ship and a crew," Will gestured behind him.
"Where's Sao Feng?" Elizabeth asked.
"He'll cover our escape and meet us at Shipwreck Cove."
They all raced down to the docks; the mood between Katy, Alex and the brothers no less awkward. Still, at least they were on their way to get Jack and Hazel. And on the way, they had plenty of time to sort things out...