She spends the first seven hours of her life alone.
The doctors whisked her away from her mom as soon as she was delivered; they needed to check and monitor her as well as try to save her mom's life. She knew none of this at all.
After she was declared healthy she was supposed to be moved out of the isolated NICU area into the nursery with the other babies; an emergency delayed that move to the point where she was almost forgotten. Almost.
When her daddy came looking for her, a nurse suddenly remembered the tiny baby in the isolette. A few of them rushed to her, afraid something might have happened while she was alone, but she wasn't aware of it. She was sleeping.
That's the first time anyone beside the original team of doctors holds her; her daddy picks her right up from that isolette and cradles her close to his heart. She only wakes up when he bends his head and cries over her.
"Mommy loves you. She will be okay."
Those seven words are the first words spoken to her in her entire life.
0.o o_o o.0
After seventy-seven hours on this earth, she finally meets her mom.
"Hi, Sawyer. 'Member me? I missed you."
Those seven words not only introduce her to the most important woman in her world, they also finally give her a name to be known by.
She doesn't know what anything means or why it's all important. There's a lot of laughter, a little tears, and complete happiness as family and friends gather to celebrate the miracles they were given that day.
She's utterly content to just be held securely in her mom's arms and let the world move around her.
0.o o_o o.0
Her seventh day of existence is the first time her mom leaves.
Not in a bad way, and not for more than a few hours while she goes to the grocery store. And of course, Sawyer's not alone; she has her dad.
But she's so used to being held a certain way, hearing a certain rhythm and tone in the certain voice that constantly talks to her, that she's not pleased with this major change in her small world.
So she spends that time away from her mom putting up a fuss. Her daddy tries everything to calm her, but since the three of them came home together, he's never had to do this on his own. And things that had worked in those first few days spent without that certain someone, don't seem to have much of an effect now.
As soon as that much wanted familiarity surrounds her again, she latches on with a tiny fist and refuses to let go until she's too exhausted to care who's putting her where.
Her parents figure out that they really need to just let her be sometimes, or this could be problematic. They also agree that equal time with both mommy and daddy will go a long way towards keeping all three of them from panicking.
She's too tired to do anything but sleep, comforted that things are now the way she's always known them to be.
0.o o_o o.0
Seven months old marks her first real word.
She fascinated the adults around her with her calm, contemplative manner. No one knew what went on in that head—because she couldn't say—but they figured it had to be important for her to be able to sit or lay in such a peaceful silence when most babies her age needed to be entertained with people and toys.
Her Aunt Brooke liked to tease that she takes after both her parents already; they all just like to brood.
Her cousin Jamie says she's probably a genius, like he is. She might be figuring out something that will change the world once she can tell someone about it.
Her parents just find her amazing. They tell her that she's the absolute best baby in the whole world. They tell her that constantly.
So the one time when her mom uses the word greatest instead, it's only natural for her to disagree.
"Be't."
Sawyer B. Scott knows she's the best, and she's not afraid to tell the world that, either.
0.o o_o o.0
Seven years old is the age when she realizes the world can be a scary place.
She's led a pretty charmed life so far, but she's not fully aware of that fact. She knows there's always someone there when she needs anything, she has a lot of family and friends who love her, she has the coolest parents of anyone she knows, and she's pretty amazing—or so her parents tell her.
Then one day there's a big incident at the club where Aunt Haley and her mommy work to make music. That's what the TV calls it anyway; at least the one part she witnessed before she was sent out of the room.
She just knows her daddy's scared and upset, trying not to show that to her, as he explains she's going to stay with Jamie and Aunt Deb while he and Uncle Nathan go to Tric.
When they leave, she hears him say he can't lose her and that they need her too much.
Those words scare her. She doesn't quite understand the concept of loss since she's never experienced it. She knows there are people important to her parents that were lost and left them behind. She knows both her mommy and daddy miss those people every day.
She knows she doesn't want to have to miss either one of them.
Over the next several hours, she huddles next to Jamie, listening to the details on the news and hiding in his room when Aunt Deb comes to check on them. She's confused and worried; so is Jamie, even though he's trying to be brave for her because she's too young to have to do it on her own.
There are words she doesn't understand—words like hostages and negotiations and fatalities—that all sound bad. Words Jamie says are very, very bad. Words that mean she might lose her mommy or her aunt.
She tries really hard, but can't quite manage to evade sleep as the last several hours have taken their toll.
She wakes when she's scooped up into the embrace of the people she loves the most. Her mommy is squeezing her and her daddy locks them both tight against his chest; she can only hold on and cry.
She spends the next seven days carefully keeping an eye on her mommy in the house until she's convinced she's not going to be lost. Because almost lost is still too big and scary…and she now knows that there are things in the world that are just going to be that way.
But she's okay, because she's snuggled between her mommy and daddy in their big bed. They're all there safe and sound; no one's lost and none of them are left alone.
And that's all she really needs, anyway.
0.o o_o o.0
She has her first heartbreak in the seventh grade.
He's funny, nice, smart, and he holds open the door for her whenever they reach one at the same time. She likes to make sure that happens often. She's not sure what it means to have that feeling in her stomach when he smiles at her, but she knows she likes it.
She goes out of her way to talk to him, but finds herself unusually at a loss for words once she has his attention. She knows she blushes a lot more around him than anyone else in their grade. And she knows that the more she gets to know about him, the more she really likes the person he is.
When she gathers up her courage to tell him that, she hears things she really wishes he wouldn't say. Things like great friend and hang out and another girl's name. Things that have her stuttering out something—probably inane—with a fake smile on her face as she tries really hard not to let him see her cry. She's too proud to let him know that he hurt her, because she's thinking that being a great friend might not be as bad later as it's feeling right this moment.
She does cry when she gets home. She puts on the Disintegration album by the Cure—something her mom still does when she's sad—letting the familiar strains of music bring her comfort.
When her mom asks what's wrong, she can barely find the words to tell her what happened. She almost feels better when she's told about the many times her mom heard similar things from her dad, but she's still hurt and embarrassed over this boy.
She knows it will get better eventually. But she wants to feel better now.
She has to laugh when her dad says that boy must be really blind to not see how amazing she is and her mom points out his own lack of awareness once upon a time. He just leans over and kisses her murmuring things about her being his forever and the best dream come true.
Sawyer thinks she wants someone to say that to her; to sum up what she means to him in basically seven words. She thinks her mom is really lucky to go from great friend to true love always. She thinks maybe someday that boy—or another—might just share that with her.
And her heart feels a little less broken. Because she has the best example of what she wants, sitting right in front of her. She wants that someday. She believes she'll have it.
But for now, she'll let herself be sad for a little while and roll her eyes at her parents' annoying (not really) ability to close out the world and focus solely on each other. They never close her out though. They never will.
0.o o_o o.0
She's broken a few hearts herself by the time she's seventeen.
She and that boy have been great friends for years. They can talk to each other about anything, love a lot of the same books, movies, and music, and have a similar sense of humor and way of looking at the world.
He also has a semi-serious, long-term relationship. She doesn't.
She did try though. Over the years, she's pursued guys and they've chased her. The only problem is she doesn't quite know what to do once that part of it is over. Mostly because—as much as she tried not to—she gave her heart to a boy, piece by piece over those years until he held it all.
He doesn't know that. And she's too scared to risk their friendship by telling him that. Because she remembers how much it hurt when she only just liked him and he wouldn't return her feelings.
So she dates. Some great guys and some not so great guys. She had two not-so-serious relationships that lasted quite a while. One ended when the boy moved away; the other when she refused to sleep with him.
She's not ready for that step yet. Her mom says she's proud of her for knowing and respecting herself well enough to do what she feels is right for her.
That doesn't stop her mom from hinting that she should tell that boy of hers what he means to her. Because even if he doesn't return those feelings that way, at least he'll know she feels them.
She's not ready for that step yet. And she's proud of herself for doing what's right for her; her mom just rolls her eyes, laughs, and mentions a story about a long-ago championship game.
Maybe someday. And no, the irony of that story isn't lost on her, either.
But someday isn't now, because in the now, there's another boy who she thinks she just might be able to give her heart to. He's sweet in his own way, with a very different way of looking at the world, opening her eyes to things she's never considered before.
Her boy doesn't like him. He worries that she's in over her head and will be taken advantage of. She's feisty and stubborn enough to take serious offense at that. So they fight. A huge, ugly, no-holds-barred kind of fight, though she still won't tell him of her feelings. And they yell, say mean things, and decide never to talk again.
Her parents aren't sure how to deal with this new, broken girl that comes home. But before she goes to bed, her mom says seven simple words: Hey. We love you, you know that?
She does. And she thinks that maybe things won't be as horrible as she had thought. Because she has so much more going for her than a lot of people her age.
So she tells them what happened and promises that she won't try to do it all alone. She's not alone, and she never really has been.
0.o o_o o.0
She's rushing to her seventh period class one day when her world changes in a big way.
She has her favorite class in the last hour of the day. It's art, where she can situate herself in a little corner and express emotions in much the same manner her mom has always done. Plus, as her Aunt Haley teases, it being the last part of the day practically guarantees she won't skip school. She has before; she just comes back in time for that last class.
This is one such day that happens. She had skipped sixth period history to hang out in the gym with her kind-of boyfriend. Mostly because that boy has athletics there that period, and she wants to check on him without his knowing. And maybe show him that she's just fine without him…even if she's not.
She lingers after the bell rings, debating whether to approach him or not. It's been weeks since that big fight, and there hasn't been even one word spoken between the two. She misses him.
He doesn't notice her there, because his attention is focused on his girlfriend heading his way. She pretends it doesn't hurt to see that and turns around to leave. She also pretends to not hear him call her name as she does so.
She's looking for a way to distract herself as she's rushing across campus when her phone rings; she answers without looking at the display.
It's a mess of tears and choked out, mangled words. Her heart starts pounding in her ears as she picks out the scary words. Like accident and hospital and coma. She ignores the command to stay there until her uncle gets there, hanging up her phone and sprinting full out to the parking lot.
Tears are streaming down her face and blurring her vision so bad and she's finding it hard to catch her breath. Her hands are nowhere steady enough to even put the key in the door; she falls against her car and curses fate out loud.
Without her knowing exactly how it happens, she's seated in the passenger seat and her boy simply starts driving to the one word he managed to decipher in her cursing.
He's holding her hand when she rushes towards her family in the waiting room and keeps them interlocked as she hears the news; she doesn't think about it then, but she definitely appreciates his silent support.
It's her Aunt Brooke. She and her best friend were headed to the store when a car going in the opposite direction suddenly accelerated and swerved into their lane, causing a head on collision. Brooke landed in surgery and a medically induced coma.
Sawyer feels guilty for being a little relieved, but she is. Because her mom's okay…more or less. She has a concussion and a fracture to her left arm. But she's okay.
She spends the next several days keeping vigilance at the hospital with her mom; they're both waiting for Brooke to wake up. Her dad is there as well, but mostly to support his wife. It doesn't escape her notice that her boy is there, too. For her.
Brooke wakes up. Sawyer silently apologizes for that initial rush of relief on knowing that it wasn't her mom who was badly injured. She thinks her Aunt Brooke would understand about that because her mom and aunt have a sisterhood like no other.
Later, when she finally collapses onto her bed in a daze, she can't stop the tears that fall. It's all of the pent up emotions from the past few days that overwhelm her, leaving her a mass of things she can't separate.
She's pulled into a pair of strong arms, familiar arms. She burrows close and clings to her great friend until there's no more tears.
She's not sure why it is or how she knows it, but she figures that someday is now. She tilts her head back and meets his eyes, which are filled with worry and concern for her.
She very softly and tentatively presses her lips to his, feeling him stiffen for a split second before kissing her back. It only lasts a moment before he pulls completely away. She's scared she just ruined their friendship, but strangely lighter now that she's taken even that small step.
But then he says, "We can't. Not while I'm with her."
And those seven little words fill her with hope. Because they imply that he feels something for her. Something more than just her being his great friend. She only nods and keeps the words she wants to say to herself while she watches him leave.
She goes searching for her mom wanting to see if she's okay. What she finds is a mirror of what she just went through; her mom's in tears and her dad is holding her in his arms, comfortingly and securely. The only difference here is that her parents openly share how much they love each other, both with actions and with words.
She wants that, too. And she thinks that maybe she'll have it soon.
0.o o_o o.0
There's seven blocks between her house and his.
Blocks they have practically worn out traveling back and forth over the years of their friendship. Blocks that feel so far away, now that she doubts what she was so sure of before.
It's been a few days since she kissed him and he pulled away. Days she spent avoiding him at school and being "busy" when he called or came over. The day after it happened, she had been so sure…until she got to school and ran into his girlfriend. She's a perfectly lovely girl and Sawyer's the reason she might have her heart broken. That day at lunch, she saw them together, smiling. And she thought she'd be the one with the broken heart. So she avoids him. For days.
She's scared.
Her mom says that's normal and fine, but she shouldn't let that hold her back.
She learned from one of her moms that life is all about taking risks and really living. She sums it up in much the same way she heard it: every song ends, but enjoy the music. She sums it up in seven simple words that really make Sawyer stop and think.
No matter how it ends, she wants him to know she loves him. He might not feel it back, may never want to be more than her friend, but his not knowing is a bigger problem.
Because that leaves her with a giant what if. What if her mom never told her dad? Would he have ever gotten over his fear of rejection to lay it on the line first? Or would they have just never gotten together?
She doesn't want to wonder the same things about her and that boy. She wants to know, once and for all, where she stands. So they can move forward together or she can move past it on her own.
And maybe she just needed a reminder that even if it sucks at first, things can get better. Her mom put herself out there and heard oh in response. Her dad finally got it together to open his heart and admit he loves her back. It was bad, then it was good. She hopes her attempt ends well, too.
The trip across those seven blocks never felt so long and so quick at the same time. Almost before she's completely ready, she's standing in the doorway to his room, watching him flip through a stack of pictures. He pauses over one, bringing it closer to his face, a smile like she's never seen him wear graces his lips. The sight of that smile makes her want to run away before he sees her. She almost does. Almost.
Instead, she enters the room fully and stands beside him before he really has a chance to react. It also gives her an opportunity to see what the picture holds.
It's her. The camera caught her mid laugh, blue eyes shining, hair a wild mess of curls. It's kind of a recent picture, too.
It seems like he's not sure what to do or say. She's not really sure either. She shifts her feet and opens her mouth to finally say the words, but she's interrupted. He tugs her arm, causing her to tumble onto the bed beside him. His lips cover hers before she can catch her bearings. She kisses him back.
When they separate, their eyes meet and she sees everything she ever wanted to see there. So she tells him that she's in love with him and has been for a really long time now. He smiles at her, tucks a stray curl behind her ear and does the absolute best thing. He says it back.
She's never really been alone, because she has her mom and dad always, and she had a great friend to share her life with. Now she thinks that she'll never be alone in a completely different way, because she loves someone who loves her, too.
She's happy.
0.o o_o o.0
Seven years after they say I love you, they gather in front of family and friends and say I do.
She wanted to wait until they finished college and got started a little bit in their perspective careers. He kind of didn't want to wait. They made it work anyway.
He works in a firm as a junior architect, and is quickly establishing himself as a creative and technical genius. He likes to credit the former to his artist love. She followed her mom's footsteps in opening her own business. She has an art gallery that showcases up and coming local artists, including both herself and her mother. Mainly because her mom's stuff had sold well in the past when she put it out there, surprising no one but herself. It started out as illustrations for children's books—a family venture—and quickly turned into something big. Sawyer was totally willing to take advantage of that in order to gain attention for her gallery.
As much as the couple always knew they'd marry, the actual decision was still a surprise.
They were on a picnic and walking around the lake that had so much history for her parents. Then they found it, a tree in which a preteen boy carved his best dream; a tree that wasn't a focal point in the dream-come-true wedding, but was there, nonetheless.
Sawyer couldn't help but take a picture of it, and he couldn't help himself from pulling her closer and whispering that he wanted to make his dreams come true, right here.
She cried.
They stood and exchanged vows in the same spot he made that declaration…right next to a tree that represents her parent's love for each other. Strong. Enduring. Everlasting. Timeless.
She dances with her new husband to a wonderful song her aunt Haley wrote just for them. Over his shoulder, she spies her uncle Nathan watching his wife sing with a silly grin on his face. Her cousin and his wife are softly teasing each other at a table near the stage. Aunt Brooke and Uncle Julian are chatting to their son in a way that's making him blush—so Sawyer knows it has to do with the young lady he invited as his date.
They all have such amazing relationships. But then she sees what she has always considered the absolute best love story in the world. And it belongs to her mom and dad.
Her dad takes her mom by the hand and leads her to the dance floor, joining the newly married couple swaying to the music. He rests his forehead against hers, and they manage to gaze into each other's eyes in a way that lets Sawyer know they've closed out the world and are only focused on each other.
She lays her head on her husband's chest and closes her eyes, savoring the feelings running through her right now. She says she loves him and he says it back.
She's not sure she's supposed to hear it, but her parent's are close enough that she does. Her mom says that she told him so and when her dad asks what, the response causes tears to form in the eyes of both father and daughter.
We're gonna dance at this kid's wedding.
Sawyer feels a catch in her throat as she imagines how terrifying that uncertainty had to have been. To be faced with a more obscure future than usual. But, somehow, her mom managed to convince her dad of something important, with only seven words.
We are gonna live happily ever after.
Because they are.
They were two kids who didn't take an easy path and created many obstacles to their having a romantic relationship. They survived everything the world threw at them, and they did so together. They managed to hold onto a love so strong, the fundamental core never altered, no matter what happened.
Sawyer wants that. Holding her husband close, she knows that now she has it.
And it's the absolute best thing.
fin.
A/N: First thing for OTH that I've written. Not sure what it is exactly; just what came out during a stressful afternoon at work! Just a few snapshots of Sawyer Scott growing up.
Oh, and it just wouldn't be OTH without weird dramatic situations. that place seems to have more 'psychos' than any little town; so I included one too, lol! Let me know what
you think...