Hi, guys. This is my first Percy Jackson Fic. That I've posted anyways.

Shout out to Abigail. Sorry for the wait.

To Ness if you're reading this, weren't expecting this were you?

Sorry, got carried away.

PJO – ME NO OWN

Chap 1 Percy

It was a normal day in Camp Half-Blood. Swords were clashing, Travis begging for mercy at the feet of his plant-loving girlfriend ( with a slight anger-management problem ), Mrs. O'Leary tail pounding the ground causing mini earthquakes, the occasional camper slipping on her pee – perfectly normal.

Hi. I'm Percy Jackson. But then again, if you didn't know me, you wouldn't even be here. On that wonderful day, I was hiding from all the commotion at my favorite place in camp – the lake. For those of you who don't know, I'm a son of Poseidon, Greek god of the sea. And I know what you're thinking, You mean that super old, super wrinkly, barnacle encrusted sea god? Half marks. He's not really wrinkly, nor does he look that old. That's a bit exaggerated. A bit.

'My Lord!' A gurgly voice said in my mind. I sighed. The thing with Poseidon's kids, sea critters and ponies have the tendency to talk to you. A lot. I peered into the lake, ignoring the giggling naiads whose language I've never seemed to be able to speak. I found myself staring into the face ( ? ) of what was most likely the ugliest catfish in the world. It made Clarisse look like a fairy princess. Don't tell her that though – she'll have my head.

'My lord,' It repeated. 'Your father has sent for you.'

'… Ok … '

'Very good, let us proceed-'

'You don't have any mirrors at your place, do you?' I blurted out.

'Place, my lord?'

'Um,' I scanned through my list of words that I managed to absorb from Annabeth's lectures. Be it Architecture or sandwich making, that girl would be able to find something to yell at me about.

'Habitat.' I said, satisfied with my choice of words.

'No, my lord.' It replied, slightly confused.

Figures. It would be the only one on earth that wouldn't want to burn their eyes of after looking at itself. Then I realized , 'Wait,' I said. 'Catfishes are freshwater fish, so how did my dad tell you to find me?' It shook It's head sadly ( Can fish shake their heads? ), 'The previous messenger was not used to our water,' It's said gloomily. 'It's last wish was for me to deliver the message to you, my Lord!' It bawled. 'Um ... Im sorry for your loss?' I mumbled awkwardly, patting it's head.

After comforting the poor guy, I waved and set off for my dad's fortress. Oh yeah, for future references, sea god kids can breathe underwater, no gills. Yeah, that and we have a very strong stink – probably the fish.

As I approached dad's fortress, the only thing that came to mind was: green. [Yes, thank you for reminding me of my stupidity, dear girlfriend.] I was slightly surprised – normally when I see dad, I'll probably be in trouble. So quite often. But I hadn't seen the newly rebuild version of it before. Two tentacles wrapped around my arms. I turned around quickly, reaching into my pocket for Riptide, only to find myself looking at a pair of squids. Guards. 'My Lord,' they said in my mind. They led me to the family room ( which dad had insisted on getting when they were rebuilding ).'Hello, Percy. ' My ears perked up. There sitting on the couch in front of me, was my dad. I could already feel the grin crawling up my face. 'Dad-' I was interrupted by a bossy voice. 'Wipe that ridiculous grin off your face , Jackson,' As the figure turned around, my smile instantly melted off. 'You look hideous.' … Love you too, mom.

Ok, Amphrite isn't exactly my mother, she's just my dad's wife who hates my guts. Yay, me. 'Hey... ' I mumbled unsurely. 'Amphrite, dear,' Dad chided. She rolled her eyes , 'Let's just start the movie.' She said coldly. I stumbled, 'Um … Movie?' I asked. Poseidon chuckled. 'Yes, I summoned you to watch a movie with us.' He patted the seat next to him, the seat furthest away from Amphrite. 'Come, sit.' he said. I moved awkwardly to the end of the couch and plopped down. The movie started playing. The title, displayed in huge letters: THE TITANIC.

I stared at dad, giving him my best out-of-all-ocean-related-movies-you-picked-this-one look. He shrugged. 'It brought back memories of my youth.'

'Memories?'

'Yes. You see Percy, back in the days, my fights with my brothers were, believe it or not, much worse compared to now. [ Shocking. ] I got into one with them and ended up losing. I was angry. I was playing with the waves to calm myself down. At one point I accidentally lost focus and turned it into a giant iceberg, and well … ' He trailed off.

'You CAUSED the sinking of the Titanic?!' I asked in a strangled voice.

'It was an accident!' He protested.

'Boys,' said a deadly voice.

We winced. ' Just watch the movie.' she warned giving us a death glare. We mumbled apologies. That woman was scary. She must have been an impossible mom, I almost felt sorry for Triton. I realized he wasn't there. [ Yes! Im slow! So shut up about it! ]

'So,' I said, trying to break the ice, 'Where's Triton?'

'Come my friends, let us party!' the devil himself announced loudly as he slammed the doors open. [ No, Triton, not Hades. That would be creepy. ] He had a huge group of merpeople circling him. 'Now, to me!' He said raising a bottle of … Beer? Then he noticed the three pairs of eyes staring at him.

' Oh Tatarus.'

Sorry for the randomness.

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Bye!