Hey guys, this is just a little one shot. I watched Glee the other day and I watched Dianna perform Problem and since I ship Rachel/Quinn I thought I might turn this into a little story. I hope you like it.
I don't own anything.
Enjoy!
"Kurt, I really don't understand why we need to go out to the football field. Santana said that she had everything under control." I huffed while I got dragged over towards the bleachers even though I had better stuff to do. We still needed members for the glee club but I couldn't search for any if I have to watch the "old" cheerios looking for members.
"Rachel, will you just relax?" Kurt asks me and rolls his eyes at me. I follow him and sit down on the lowest bench on the bleachers.
"I can't really relax, not if we still don't have…" I stopped mid sentence. There she was dancing in that unbelievable short skirt. I watched her move to the beat that the band was creating. I couldn't even hear anything around me anymore. I just watched her, every move.
"Rachel!" I jumped about five feet high. Kurt was watching me with a slight smirk on his face.
"What?" I ask him and blink a few times, trying to concentrate on what was about to leave his mouth.
"Did you hear a word I just said?" He asked me with amusement in his voice.
"I'm sorry. I was watching Santana perform, like you said we should." I lie.
"I'm not sure that it was Santana that you have been watching." I looked at him and could feel the heat rise in my face.
"I have no idea what you are talking about." I tell him and try to act clueless, hoping that my acting skills would come in handy.
"You still won't admit it?" Kurt asked me and I had to look away under his intense gaze.
"Admit what?" I ask silently and watch the girls talk to the cheerios.
"That you are in love with Quinn." I turn around so fast that I have to close my eyes for a second to get my focus back.
"I am not in love with Quinn. I don't know what made you think that." I tell him and get up to leave but Kurt stands in my way.
"Why won't you just admit it?" He asks me and I look away. It is true that I have had a crush on Quinn most of my high school time but we really started to bond when Finn died. Even thought she wasn't able to be here during the week we dedicated to him, she was there for me when I needed to call someone in the middle of the night and a shoulder to cry on. My feelings started to grow into so much more and without really realizing it I fell in love with Quinn. There were only two problems. She was with Puck now and I felt guilty, somehow I felt like I would betray Finn.
"I can't betray him like this." I whisper softly and hear Kurt sigh behind me.
"Rachel, it has been over a year and I know that you still love him just as much and that you will always have a place in your heart for him and nobody can doubt that but maybe, just maybe, it is time to love again, to let someone love you again." I can feel a tear running down my cheek and I wipe it away with my thumb.
"You are forgetting something Kurt. Even if I would admit my feelings towards her there is still something that I can't change. She is with Puck now and let's face it, they are the perfect match, they belong together."
"Bullshit!" Kurt says with force. "They do not belong together. They have a bond, there is no doubt about that but have you ever thought that she is just with Puck because you never stepped up?" I look at Kurt.
"What do you mean?" I ask him, he has lost me.
"I have seen the way that she has looked at you when she was with us and she thought no one was watching, hell even Santana has seen it." I look up sharply.
"Don't tell me Santana knows about this?" I ask him fearfully.
"Who do you think ordered me to bring you here?" Kurt said with a smile on his face.
"Hey midget!" I turn around to see Santana, Brittany and Quinn walking over towards us.
"Don't call her that." I hear Quinn say and slap her arm.
"Hey, that is my friendly nickname for her and it's nicer than anything you ever came up with." At that Quinn looks away guilty and I scowl at Santana. I get up and walk down the steps onto the field towards Quinn. She is still not looking at me so I take her chin in my hand and make her look at me.
"Don't listen to Santana. You know I forgave you for everything and that we are past this. She is just trying to rile you up." I tell her and look her straight in the eyes, those beautiful hazel eyes that can see right into my soul.
"Well it's working." She tells me and a small smile is playing at the corner of her lips.
"It shouldn't be." I tell her and wrap my arms around her waist to pull her into a hug. I can feel her arms sneak around my back, trapping me, not that I minded that much. Every hug was a bittersweet pleasure, to feel her body so close to me, the heat radiating from her body.
"Can you make out later? We still need to find people for the glee club." And just like this Santana has managed to ruin the moment again. I can feel Quinn stiffen slightly at the comment.
"Leave them baby. They still need to figure out that they are both in love with each other." Brittany says and takes Santana's hand to pull her away. I can feel the arms that were just wrapped around me loosen and fall down to Quinn's side. I look up at her but her face is unreadable.
"Don't listen to them." I tell her jokingly trying to lighten the mood. I can see that she is forcing a smile.
"Just like old times." She jokes back but I can hear that her heart is not in it. I give her a nod and start to follow the others, looking back to so see Quinn still standing there. She is watching me with a look I don't know how to interpret. She looks up and catches my gaze; I could swear that she is starting to blush. "Are you coming?"
"Yes." She tells me and starts to walk towards me. I get into motion again and feel her presence a few seconds later next to me.
"Your number was very good." I tell her and look straight ahead so that she wouldn't catch me blushing.
"It was Santana's idea. I never thought that I would wear one of those again."
"But you look so hot in them. " I say before I can catch myself. My eyes open wide in shock and I stop. I can't look at her.
"You think so?" Quinn asks me interested; I only give a weak nod. "Well maybe I should wear my uniform more often then." I look up and see her catching my eyes before she is turning and walking towards the lockers leaving me behind, a little breathless. Did she just flirt with me? No, that can't be. I shake my head and start to run after her.
xXx
"We only have four members." Kurt says and puts his head into his hands. Right now we are sitting at Breadsticks with the other old members of the glee club discussing what our next step should be.
"They are really good though." I throw in and receive nods from everyone around the table.
"Let's eat and then think about ways." Santana throws in and at the exact moment our food arrives. We all eat mostly in silence, here and there are a few conversations going on. I don't really listen to any of them; I'm trying to think of ways to get more members but suddenly my attention get's drawn to a conversation to my right.
"So where is Puckermann?" I can hear Santana asking Quinn. I still look down at my salad so that they won't notice that I'm listening to their conversation.
"Who in the world knows? He is gone more than he is here." Quinn answers and I can see her shrug from the corner of my eye.
"You guys still good?" Santana asks and I can see her looking over towards me now; I try to look to the other side but I'm sure that she has realized that I've been eavesdropping.
"We are just like we always were." Quinn just answers shortly and keeps eating. I look back up from my plate in time to see Santana smirking at me and giving me a wink; I almost choke on my lettuce. A hand is rubbing my back and it takes me a second to realize that that hand belongs to Quinn. "Are you okay?"
"Yes, thank you." I tell her and see Santana hiding a smile behind her hand.
"Are you sure?" Quinn moves a little closer and I can feel the heat of her thigh against my bare one. I have to stifle a moan when I think about the way how the bare skin of her tight would feel between my tights.
"Yeah Rach, are you sure?" I shoot Santana a nasty look.
"I just think that I need some fresh air." I tell them and ask Kurt politely to let me through. I grab my coat and step out into the cool air. I take a calming breath.
"That is how I always felt when Britt was close to me." I spin around surprised to see Santana leaning against the wall with a soft smile on her lips.
"I don't know what you mean." I tell her and turn back around.
"It feels like your skin is on fire wherever yours meets hers, your breath is sucked straight out of your lungs and you feel prickly all over." I close my eyes, how can she be so right?
"That is not how I feel." I make one last try.
"That is not what it looked like." She tells me.
"What do you know?" I ask her and spin around to face her. "You know nothing about this, nothing about how I feel. Nothing about the guilt that is eating away at me for feeling the way I do. You knew that Brittany loved you, that she would stand by you no matter what. You knew that it would change nothing between you, that even if it wouldn't work out you would always have each other. I don't have all that. I just got her back as a friend and I will not ruin that. I would rather be her friend than not be in her life at all." I yell at Santana.
"How do you know that she doesn't want you in her life like Britt wanted me in her life?" Santana yells back.
"I just do. How can she love someone like me? Some days I feel damaged beyond repair. Why would she want to hold me together when she can have Noah, who finally got his life on track and can offer her stability?" I tell her and a sob escapes my mouth.
"Would someone tell me what the hell is going on out here?" I look past Santana to see Quinn standing in the entrance, arms wrapped around her body to protect herself from the cold evening breeze.
"Nothing Q." Santana tells her without turning around. I can see that Quinn is searching my face but I don't look straight at her.
"I'm not sure that this is true." She steps closer towards us so that she is now next to Santana.
"Santana is right. There is nothing going on here; we were just talking." I tell her.
"So that is the reason you two were yelling at each other because there is nothing going on?" Quinn asks skeptically.
"Rachel, just tell her." Santana says pleadingly. I look at her and can see her giving me a supporting look.
"Tell me what?" Quinn asks concerned. "Is everything okay with you Rachel?" She takes a closer look but I just take one step back.
"No, Rachel has a problem with her heart." Santana says.
"Shut up Santana!" I yell at her and now Britt and Kurt have followed us as well.
"Is everything alright?" Kurt asks us and looked from Quinn's confused face to Santana's daring face to my angry one.
"Will you all just leave me alone?" I tell them in a broken voice and turn around to leave. I can hear someone yell after me but I just put my hands over my ears and start to break out into a run. When the need for air finally becomes too much for me I start to slow down. I find myself standing in front of the high school, this place won't just let me go; I think to myself before I walk towards the entrance. I pull out the key that I have now that I'm teaching glee club and make my way towards the locker that I know once belonged to Quinn. I stand in front of it and stare at it for some time until I finally sit down and lean my back against it. I look down the halls that I have walked so many times. I can see myself standing on the opposite side of the hall watching Quinn have so many conversations with Finn. I can feel myself thinking that I was always looking only at her, that I was mesmerized with her from the beginning. I still remember every encounter we had in this hallway, every slushy, every insult, every smile, every hug.
"You used to stand over there, hiding behind the door of your locker, thinking that I wouldn't see you but I always saw you." I look up startled and could see that Quinn was standing at the end of the hall, hands in the pockets of her jeans, she wasn't wearing a coat, which mean she took off straight after me. I don't say anything; I just watch her walk slowly towards me. She doesn't sit down next to me but on the opposite side of the hall, right under my old locker. I watch her for a few moments and she looks right back at me.
"So you always saw me?" I ask her softly after a while and can see her smile softly.
"Always." She just answers and I don't know how to proceed from here on.
"You never said as much as a word."
"Because I always knew that you were never looking at me that way." She tells me with a small shrug.
"That's not true. I just realized while sitting here that I was only looking at you." I tell her softly.
"You are just saying that now."
"I would never say anything that wasn't true and you know that this is true." I tell her and see her nod at me.
"I know that you have been nothing but honest, which makes me wonder why you lied to me back at the restaurant." She tells and I can't look away. I didn't know what I was supposed to tell her; I could not tell her the truth.
"I didn't lie to you." I tell her but she raises her eyebrow right away. "Okay; I might have left out some of the truth."
"Won't you tell me?" She asks me softly and leans forward, resting her elbows on her knees and her face in her hands.
"I don't know how?" I tell her truthfully and take a deep breath.
"Just start at the beginning." She tells me easily and I smile at the way she makes it sound too easy.
"Ever since Finn died I felt lost. I felt like I didn't belong with anyone anymore. Every single one of my friends had somebody, except me. Then there was you; the one that was not even friendly to me in school was suddenly the only hold I had. You were my rock, my shoulder to cry on and my call in the middle of the night when I couldn't stand the world anymore. You were everything I needed." I looked up for the first time during my speech and could see that Quinn was staring intently at me, hanging on to every word I said.
"I'm sorry but I can't see anything wrong in that." She tells me after a few minutes of silence.
"There isn't anything wrong with that but then something happened that I didn't expect and it scared me so bad that I didn't know that I should do about it, so I decided to wait."
"For what?" She asks me and starts to move closer to me; I swallow hard.
"For a sign that I should take action, step up but I was too late." I tell her and watch her mesmerized while she is crawling towards me, her movements like a cat.
"What make you think you are too late?" Quinn is now right in front of me, watching, waiting for me to say something.
"Somebody stepped up before I did." I whisper and watch her come even closer, her face only inches from mine.
"Are you sure you got your facts right?" She asks me in a teasing tone. Before I can answer her she leans in and kisses me and just like that I forgot everything around me. Her lips were softer than any other pair of lips I ever felt on mine. I couldn't believe that I was really sitting in the hallways of Mckinley High kissing Quinn Fabray. I was so shocked that my body was working on autopilot. I could feel myself kissing back like there was no tomorrow and when Quinn's tongue nudged my bottom lip for me to open my mouth and let her in I did so willingly. Finn was right, this is like seeing fireworks. Suddenly my eyes popped open. Finn! I pulled back so fast that I hit my head on the locker behind me.
"Ouch." I put my hand on the bump that was already starting to form on the back of my head.
"Oh god Rachel, are you alright?" Quinn asks me concerned and touches the back of my head; I could feel tingles from the spot where her fingertips softly touched my scull.
"I'm alright." I tell her and pull back from her touch. She looks at me confused and wounded.
"Are you sure?" She asks me again and I can tell this time the question has a double meaning.
"Quinn…I…" I start but don't know how to proceed.
"I thought that you meant…that you wanted…" Quinn starts confused but I interrupt her.
"I do. I really wanted this, god you have no idea how much." I tell her and she smiles at me. "It's just that…Quinn."I say again and can see her eyeing me curious.
"You can tell me anything." Quinn whispers after a few moments of silence.
"I feel guilty." I can see realization dawning on Quinn's face. "I really wanted this to happen. Quinn I have fallen so deeply in love with you that there is no way that I will land softly on the ground. It's just that I feel guilty for those feelings." I explain to her.
"You are in love with me?" She asks me and I can see that she is trying to hide a smile.
"More than you know." I answer. Quinn sits down next to me with her back against the locker and takes my left hand in both of hers. I enjoy the feeling of her hands and watch the way she enwinds our fingers, the perfect fit.
"I know where you are coming from Rachel because I feel just as guilty as you do. Finn was my friend, even after everything I put him and you for that matter through. I still love him too and he will always have a spot in my heart. This is why I never gave you a sign; I was feeling just as guilty for my feelings for you as you were for your feelings for me. Then about a month ago I realized something. Finn loved us just as much as we loved him and he would want to see us both happy and if that means that we could be happy together he would want that for us as well because that is just the guy he was. So I stopped, I stopped feeling guilty. I started to let my feelings for you become clear; I started to think of you ever so often and if those things were developing in a private way I would let them. I started to show you more affection and I was encouraged by you so I didn't stop." I look at her and can see that she means what she is saying. I leant forward and placed a soft kiss on her lips.
"I love you Quinn." I tell her and I see her whole face transform into something of pure bliss.
"I love you Rachel." I kiss her again and again. She is right; Finn would want us to be happy. When we finally pulled apart because we needed some air we smiled at each other.
"What are we going to do now?" I asked her softly and saw her smile.
"I thought that we might do a little bit more of that." Quinn answered in return and kissed me again, this time with more force. I moaned unintentionally, which gave Quinn the chance to slip her tongue into my mouth, a whole range of flavors started to explode in my mouth. We fought for dominance until I gave up and let Quinn take over. I was surprised when Quinn suddenly started to suck on my tongue. I just couldn't behave myself anymore and straddled her lap to get even closer to her. As soon as I was on top of her I could feel both of her hands starting to roam my back. My hands found her hair and tangled themselves into the soft locks of her golden blonde hair.
"Nice move Berry." We both broke apart panting and looked to our left to see Santana standing hand in hand with Brittany.
"Santana I swear to god…" I start but Quinn just pulls me closer and suddenly the button of her jeans hits a soft spot and I start to moan, which is barley loud enough for Quinn to hear.
"Go find the closet you used to make out in and leave us in peace." Quinn growls and pulls me just a little closer hitting that spot again; I start to whimper.
"You alright there Berry?" Santana yells amused.
"Fine." I answer a little shaken and bury my face in Quinn's neck.
"They are gone." Quinn whispers softly into my ear and I feel a shiver running down my spine. I lift my head to see her staring at me, she is smirking.
"What?" I ask her.
"You look a little flushed." She answers amused and I can feel the heat rising.
"Oh well…um…you see…" I don't get to finish my sentence because Quinn's lips are back on mine. I break the kiss to start kissing down her neck and back up sucking and occasionally biting. I'm trying to familiarize myself with every single inch of her neck, every sweet spot she has and I'm doing great until I hit a spot right below her ear and suddenly she pulls me even closer with a fast move and the button hits home. A throaty moan leaves my mouth and I open my eyes to see Quinn staring at me with dark eyes and a slightly open mouth.
"Do you have any idea how sexy you look right now?" She asks me and I just shake my head in response, not trusting my voice to not break. Experimentally she pulls me close again and again; I try to keep my breath even but when her pelvis meets mine with every pull I lose it.
"Quinn." I moan right into her ear and can feel her smile against my shoulder.
"Yes, Rachel."
"If you are not planning to have sex with me right here we should probably get up." I tell her but feel her pull me close again.
"Well where would you rather have me?" She asks me with that sexy low voice of hers.
"I can think of a few places."I tell her and get up and offer her my hand, which she takes smiling.
I hope you had as much fun reading this as I had writing this. Please let me know what you thought of it. xoxo