Author's Note:I got the inspiration for this from the most random prompt ever (it being "in a low bed"). I had originally intended for it to be a one-shot, but after my over-enthusiastic friends insisted I continue it, I let my imagination run wild. Besides, the certain somebody that shows up deserves more ficcage love. This has really turned into something much more for me, and not even I know where the story will take me. I have done my best to keep everyone in character, so please be nice! I hope you all enjoy it!
Unlikely Savior
Chapter 1
In a low bed he lay, waiting. He was on an alien world, unable to communicate with the natives. And the damned stasis cuffs were still fast around his wrists, leaving him paralyzed. Starscream's head lay beside him, silent for the first time in solar cycles. Also for the first time, Megatron was actually glad to have his traitorous second in command by his side.
"What do you think they will do with us?" Starscream asked quietly. Megatron knew he only asked because he was more vulnerable without a body.
"I doubt anything good. Didn't you see the greedy looks on their... faces, if you could call them faces. I wager they'll take us apart, dissect us. Or at least, they'll take me apart; they'll probably hook you up to various primitive machines and study your hard drive until you frag up and explode," Megatron responded darkly.
"Ever the ray of sunshine, are we?"
"Oh, yes. I'm surpised you haven't overheated yet from my brilliant radiance." They fell silent again, both forced to stare ever upwards. They did not know it, but both of their troubled, crimson optics traced the strange patterns lacing across the ceiling.
"I wonder what Lugnut is doing without your aft to kiss," Starscream said suddenly.
"It really is impossible for you to keep your mouth shut, isn't it?"
"Humor me."
"I'm lying here waiting to be taken apart piece by excruciating piece, and you want me to ponder what Lugnut does when I'm gone?"
"Well, you're no fun. I only wondered if you thought Lugnut would go off the deep end as well. Maybe he'd try something creative... What was that ridiculous thing the humans do when they're depressed? Cut themselves?" his laugh was empty of humor.
Megatron's brow raised a fraction of an inch. "You, my not-so-loyal second, are completely insane."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
Their attention was diverted to the doorway, the sounds of light, fast footsteps drawing them. Half a dozen of the strange, insectoid creatures entered the room, their multifaceted, greedy eyes shining deep orange and goldenrod as they lurched on spindly legs. They slowed as they got closer to the Cybertronians, whizzing and clicking fervently to each other in their strange language. Megatron fancied they sounded like printers sped up about a hundred times. They stopped a healthy distance away from Megatron's malicious blood red optics and downturned mouth, the more craven insectoids craning their necks around their braver comrades to get a good look at his powerful form.
"Any last words, oh mighty Megatron?"
The Decepticon leader allowed himself a crooked grin. "I regret nothing."
"There's no need for that, no. Wasp needs you alive and functional, yes." Megatron gaped up in surprise at a pair of mad, violet optics that seemed to appear out of nowhere.
"Wasp? What a pleasant surprise to see you here. It's been far too long, my dear friend," he said, recovering his composure at once and smiling almost sweetly up at the dull green mech.
"Hehehe, friend indeed," Wasp chuckled, an optic twitching. He pointed at the stasis cuffs. "You help Wasp get revenge on Bumblebot, Wasp take stasis cuffs off. Yes?"
"What about me?" Starscream piped in desperately. Wasped glanced at him, noticing him for the first time.
"Wasp don't know who you are, but if you help Wasp get Bumblebot, Wasp will get you new body, yes." He looked back at Megatron, eagerly awaiting an answer.
"I don't see how I could pass up such a tempting offer. I accept," Megatron said. Wasp clapped his hands together gleefully, before quickly undoing the cuffs and tossing them aside.
"Good good good, yes... Mighty Megatron will make good ally for Wasp, yes," he patted Megatron's fusion cannon almost lovingly, before reaching over him to pick up Starscream's head.
"Poor little bot lost his head, hehe," Wasp twittered to himself. He tucked Starscream under his arm despite the Decepticon's vocal protests. He helped Megatron up, tugging excitedly on the larger mech's elbow.
"We leave quickly, yes. Wasp has ship, hunt down Bumblebot. Blow his aft sky high, ka-boom!" he cackled, optic twitching violently. He waved away the natives, who scattered before him, and led Megatron hurriedly down a maze of hallways, all but the floor covered in the same spidering patterns that adorned the ceiling of the room they left far behind.
Megatron could not help but be amused by the former Autobot's antics. He smirked lazily down at Starscream's furiously indignant expression, glaring out from under Wasp's arm.
"This could get interesting. What do you think, Starscream?"
"I think as soon as I get a new body I'm going to kill something."
"You get plenty chance to kill something, yes! But Wasp get killing blow of Bumblebot, hehehe!" Wasp almost giggled, patting the top of Starscream's head like a human child would pet a cat.
"Change that something to something that starts with a 'W' and ends with a 'P'."
--
To say the least, Wasp's "ship" was a flying junk heap. Bits of the armor peeled away pathetically, revealing grimy paneling and circuitry. What color it had been originally was impossible to tell, each add-on and repair making it a hulking metal quilt. Neither Megatron nor Starscream were very impressed, but they did not complain; if it could get them back to Earth or Cybertron, that would be good enough for them.
The interior was no better; the fabric of the pilot and copilot seats looked like they had been clawed, chewed, and perhaps regurgitated on a few times for good measure. When Wasp set Starscream down on a gap on the control panel, a sickening sort of scratching noise could be heard as he slid down the tilted surface a fraction, like sand grinding between one's foot and cement. Needless to say, the bodiless Seeker did not look all too pleased with the accommodations.
"You said you'd give me a new body if I helped you," he huffed.
"You not helped Wasp yet, Wasp not give you body yet," Wasp stated, darting around to switch various controls in preparation for launch. Several times he moved Megatron bodily out of the way, much to the latter's silent displeasure.
"What do you expect me to do, chew on this Bumblebot's leg when we find him?" Starscream growled in frustration. "Look, I can't help you if I don't have a body!"
Wasp paused, looking at him in a surprisingly thoughtful manner. "Wasp suppose you right. Wasp will give Headbot temporary body for now, yes." He disappeared into the dingy hold of the ship, and sounds of violent rummaging could be heard. Starscream narrowed his optics after him.
"My name… is Starscream…"
"Whatever you say, Headbot," Wasp said, returning with a roll of the Cybertronian equivalent of duct tape in one hand, and a rather strange looking table with six legs in the other.
Starscream stared at him in mild horror, the use of the wrong name forgotten for the moment. "What are you going to do with that hologram platform?"
"Hologram platform has moving legs, yes? That all Headbot need to help Wasp." He pulled out a wire from the undercarriage of the device that had a rather dangerous looking plug on the end. Unceremoniously he grabbed Starscream's head, jamming the plug into a matching port in his neck, and then plunking him onto the center of the table and taping him down.
"What the sla- OW! What do you think you're doing?!" Starscream grimaced, systems readjusting painfully to the new, barely compatible hardware.
"Headbot can walk now, yes?" Wasp asked, completely ignoring the Seeker's outbursts.
Starscream wobbled quite a bit, but he could move around on his own now, if only just. He lifted up one of his makeshift, stick-like appendages and examined it distastefully. "If this is how Blackarachnia feels on a regular basis, I almost feel sorry for her."
"Enough of this chattering; when do we launch, Wasp?" Megatron broke in at last, looking extremely uncomfortable in the filthy copilot's chair.
"Right now, of course, of course! Mighty Megatron almost as impatient as Wasp to ring Bumblebot's neck, hehe!" He patted the Decepticon leader on the top of his head before continuing to adjust the controls. Megatron looked positively murderous.
Wasp finally sat in the pilot's seat, hand on the lever that started the engines. "Here we go! Whoosh!" He pushed the lever forward, and… absolutely nothing happened.
"Wasp say we go!" he yelled at the ship, banging his fist against the control panel. Still nothing. Optic twitching furiously, he got up, stormed over to the door way of the cabin, and kicked it as hard as he could. Immediately, as if there had never been a problem, the ship roared to life. While Wasp was busy with the controls, Megatron and Starscream exchanged dubious glances.
--
"Why are you letting this nutcase drag us around half the galaxy? Why don't you just kill him and take the ship?" Starscream fumed. He paced back and forth in front of Megatron, his thin legs clicking against the rusty metal floor.
Megatron glanced up casually from cleaning his fusion cannon, a sly smirk etched across his features. "My dear Starscream, why do all the work when someone could do it for you?"
The pair had retreated into the sort of common room adjoining the captain's cabin, neither of them eager to listen to Wasp's fevered conversation about all the excruciating ways he would dismember "Bumblebot." And, privately, the way how Wasp did not bother to steer the ship at all made both of them uneasy.
Starscream halted, hissing quietly through his teeth in disapproval. "That's always been your problem, Megatron; too high and mighty to lift a finger, always watching from the sidelines."
"It's worked for me so far. And really, you're one to talk; look where all your hard work got you," Megatron said, refolding the cleaning rag. Starscream chose not to comment, a tense silence falling between them.
"How is it that you manage to avoid getting a ridiculous nickname?" the Seeker asked suddenly, voice close to accusatory. Megatron eyed him sharply, mildly surprised at the rapid change of subject.
"Perhaps it's because I posses a bigger gun than you," he mused. An odd, almost mischievous expression flitted across his face. "No pun intended, of course."
Starscream was not amused. "Ah-hah ha ha," he laughed, slowly and sarcastically.
Completely out of nowhere, the ship lurched drunkenly, sending Starscream skittering across the floor on his spindly legs straight into a wall. Megatron gripped the seat cushion desperately to avoid the same fate, but his cannon, already precariously perched in his lap for cleaning, flew off and landed right on top of the unlucky Seeker with a resounding thud.
"What on Cybertron-…" Megatron muttered, hauling himself upright. He ignored Starscream's livid shouts, groping for the door of the captain's cabin.
Wasp's voice came over the intercom, accompanied by several more jolts of the ship; "Wasp thinks we have company! Eheehahaha!"