A/N1: Credits to anyjen and your 13th Chapter Intervention of A Peek at the Cooking Pot. As I said in my review, I got inspired, didn't I? :D

Yuuko has been gone for as long as I can remember. I'm lonely.

Doumeki visits frequently but lately, he hasn't been coming at all. I'm a bit worried.

I stare out the window everyday now, waiting for his presence to come by. I'm hungry for the peaceful vibes he gives off.

I don't have an appetite now that he's not coming over and speaking with his calm, stoic voice. I'm trying to connect my mind to his but he's so far away.

I'm lonely. I'm lonely. I'm lonely. Please come again... and at that time, I'll say with a smile, "Welcome."

)-()-()-()-()-()-(W)-()-()-()-()-()-(

Please don't praise the gods for what have been done to me. I have done this to myself. I have bound myself with the rope of wishes. No one can cut them – not even Doumeki. Use the sharpest knife in the whole world, have the strongest butcher in the world use the knife... it won't make a difference. It's not just a rope. It's a lock without a key. Like the red string of fate, it cannot be cut. Like the door to heaven, there is no key. This is my choice. This is my fate. Your heart won't be able to fill my heart anymore. Don't pity me. Don't apologize. You have done nothing wrong. Be glad you have other choices. Be glad you are not another. Be glad that you still have your freedom.

I've said to myself a lot of times: This path is the one you chose without hesitating. Are you heading back? You can't anymore. Look. There's no way back. The road has disappeared. You can't turn back anymore.

I said this to Doumeki once and he was so shocked and angry that he almost hit me. I closed my eyes and waited for the pain... but it never came. There was a loud bang though. I opened my eyes then, and saw that he had angrily smashed the table instead. The table had a crack running through it; it slowly crumbled into pieces. I never knew he had that strength in him, which made my fear of him grow stronger than my so-called hate for him. He looked away with a pissed expression and then got up and left the store. I just sat there looking sadly at the broken table, my legs becoming numb from the long minutes that had passed since I had sat down.

I somehow have said more and more cruel things lately, and I think that's why Doumeki hasn't been coming since. I'm feeling a bit lonely, though a bit worried. In the past, if Doumeki ever got mad, he would leave with a frown... and then come back the next day feeling as calm as ever. Mokona has been of no help. He's getting to be a bit more annoying that he is already, trying to cheer me up when I told him every time that I'm not unhappy.

Deep inside, that must be how I feel... but I doubt it. Why should I be feeling this way? Why should I care about that idiot? Why does it have to be him?

That's right. For the past few days, I have been reading. Reading shoujo manga, horoscope books, and other romance stories. I compared my feelings with theirs and to no surprise, they matched. I don't know how I'm even feeling about this. Should I be happy? Should I be sad? Should I be angry? I have fallen in love with an idiot. What makes it worse? The idiot part or the part that the other person is a guy, a rival, and someone who has been in my life since high school? I'm thinking both. Or maybe, I'm the idiot.

It's not fun, falling in love. Himawari-chan was my first crush. These crushes won't happen no more. I'm trapped in a circle, an old store, my life. Customers are not my type. They don't even seem happy in seeing me. I don't care. If I can grant their wish, then so be it. If I can't grant their wish, then so be it as well. There are some things that I can do while I cannot. A human is a poor fellow who has limits. Perfection is the worst kind of art in life. A wandering soul is an unhealthy flower that lives in the shadows.

One can doubt my powers, but I don't mind. I admit it: I don't have any. My power had been given as part of the price, though my sightseeing is still the same. Some things are questioned while some are not. Those questions are mostly the 5Ws, especially "Why?" From one "why" question comes another "why" question. I dislike "why". I can never get a decent answer.

Why is Doumeki not meeting with me anymore?

A/N: There will not be any A/N's after this chapter. That is, except the last one ;) ~SEi