AN- I own nothing whatsoever, I'm just a little person with big ideas.
White. Pure, piercing, blinding white was all he could see when he opened his eyes. Shock, confusion and fear ran through him as he struggled to find out where he was, how he got there and what had happened to him. From the moment he had woken up he had felt a sharp pain running from his shoulder all the way down his left arm.
He tried to remember where he was and what happened to him but the answers remained just out of his grasp. It was until he heard a door open and saw a flash of red flowing hair, that all of his thoughts and memories came rushing back. All of a sudden he remembered everything: jail, his brother, the plan, the escape, the doctor and being shot. It was then that he realized that he was back in the infirmary at the prison and his heart sunk. And as he lied there the events of the escape ran through his mind and he relived it all over again.
He met up with his brother and the others in the tunnel, or "route 66" as they called it, and made their way to the infirmary. Once they were just outside the examination room they had to wait until the good doctor was finished with a patient. And what was supposed to be a short wait ended up being longer than planned because Sara didn't leave the room in between patients. In all they had to wait for five inmates to come and go before they heard her tell the nurse she was going for a coffee break.
As soon as she left the room and they heard the door shut they got inside and went about doing what needed to be done. What they hadn't planned on was Sara walking back through the door only a minute after she had left. And when she saw them and what they were doing, the look of shock and betrayal that crossed her face as she stared at them did not surprise him at all.
He slowly turned his head to see if he could see where Sara had gone. He found her standing by the drug cabinet filling a syringe with some kind of drug, he couldn't tell which. When she was done she went about preparing other things but he couldn't tell what because she constantly kept her back to him. It seemed to him that she was doing it deliberately, that she didn't want to look at him or that she didn't want him looking at her. Either way he knew she was completely justified in doing so, especially after what he and his brother had done to her.
The thought of his brother made a thousand questions run through his head all at once. Where was he? Was he hurt? Did he make it out? If he did, had they caught him? He could only hope and pray that his brother was okay, that he had made it out and was still running free. Hopefully he would get the answers to those questions soon. But for now all he could do was wait.
He guessed that it had only been a few days at most since they had tried to escape and he was a little surprised to see her back at work so soon. He wasn't that surprised though, because after all she had been at work the day after the riot. She hadn't taken any time off then, but he thought that after what had happened to her when they were escaping, that it might have affected her a little more and she might have taken some time off. Obviously he was wrong.
He watched her as she finally turned around with a tray in her hands. Her gaze was fixated on the tray in front of her and it didn't waver as she made her way towards the bed he was lying on. She must have felt his eyes boring into her because her eyes came up to meet his. He didn't know what he was expecting to see in her eyes but what he saw would have made him take a step back if he had been standing.
Her eyes, which had always been so full of kindness and caring and of wanting to help, now were cold and hard and full of anger. The anger he knew would be there but the coldness in the way she looked at him was so intense that he had to look away. He was ashamed for what he had done and he only hoped that she would be able to forgive him because she was one of the only people in this prison to look at him like a real person and not just as a convict.
When Sara had walked through the door, everyone froze. No one moved and no one made a sound, it was as if someone had pushed pause on a movie and they were all stuck in that one moment and then someone pushed play again, because all at once everyone moved. Sara looked like she was about to scream or say something but before she could make any noise his brother was behind her putting his hand over her mouth.
He watched as she struggled against his brother and as he fought to keep her still. He saw as T-Bag stopped what he has been doing and started making his way toward them. Knowing what T-Bag was probably thinking he quickly grabbed a needle and filled it with it with a sedative. He made it to where Sara and his brother were still wrestling with each other just after T-Bag.
T-Bag had raised his hand and was about to hit her when he grabbed his arm mid-swing and pushed T-Bag away from her. He then turned to Sara and with his brothers help he pushed the needle into her neck and released the fluid into her system. She fell asleep within seconds and his brother gently lowered her to the floor. Seconds later they were gone.
She changed his dressings and cleaned the wound without either of them talking. He didn't know what to say to her and he didn't know what she would do if he tried to apologize. She was after all in charge of the means to control the amount of pain he felt, and he didn't want her to get so mad that she didn't give him any pain medication. But he decided that saying he was sorry might be worth the pain it could cause him, so he started by saying her name but before he could say anymore he saw her push a sedative into his IV and he felt himself falling asleep.
When he woke up he expected to be in the room alone but Sara was sitting in a stool looking over a file only a few feet away. When she noticed that he was awake she got up from the stool and walked out the door. When she walked back into the room only a few seconds later she walked over to him and started checking his vitals.
It took him a moment to find his voice and he was scared of what she might do or say but he had to tell her.
"I'm sorry," he croaked because his throat was dry and sore, "but you know why I had to do it. I didn't mean to hurt you, I swear but…"
He stopped mid-sentence when he saw the warden and officer Bellick enter the room. He knew why they were there, what they wanted to know but he also knew that he was never going to talk. They could try as hard as they wanted and wait as long as they wanted but he knew they would soon realize that pigs flying stood a better chance than him saying anything. He also knew that if he didn't talk willingly, that they would try to beat it out of him. Well they can bring it on, he thought.
And so they tried, and tried, and tried to get him to tell where his brother and the others had gone. They tried to bribe him and when that didn't work they tried tricking him. When trickery didn't work they moved onto manipulation and then to threatening. When their threats didn't scare him Bellick was about to move onto getting physical and he would have had Sara not been there.
She had demanded that she stay in the room to "monitor her patient" while the conducted their interrogation and she almost through Bellick out of the room herself when he had pushed his fist down onto his wounded shoulder. She forced them both out of the room and said they could try talking to him again the next day but she would not stand by and watch them hurt one of her patients, she didn't care what they had done.
They were not at all happy to leave because they didn't get a single question answered while he was more than glad to see them go, not only because they wouldn't be able to hurt him, but also because they answered one of his questions. His brother had made it out alive and was probably still alive because if not they would have found his body. His brother was alive, and the thought alone was almost enough to dull the pain.
After the warden and Bellick left she gave him some more painkillers then went about redressing his wound. Once the pain had subsided he tried to thank her for what she had done but she would not hear it.
"I don't care what you have to say to me, I don't want to here it. I don't want you to talk at all. The only time I want to hear your voice is when you're answering a question that I have asked you. And when you answer, I only want to hear short one word answers. If you try to say anything else I'll make sure you're drugged all day until the warden comes back to talk to you. Do you understand? I don't care what you have to say," she practically yelled at him, and then she left the room.
Every day for two weeks following that day, were exactly the same. Sara would change his bandages, she would ask him how he was feeling, if he was in pain, if it hurt when she put pressure here or there, and he would answer with either a good or bad and a yes or no. Then the warden and Bellick would come and try to get him to talk, which of course he wouldn't, and it would get to the point where Bellick would have to restrain himself from throwing himself at him and then they would leave. Then later he would go through the same routine with Sara, never saying more than one word at a time. Night would come and go, the day would start anew and he would go through the same things all over again.
But at the end of two weeks he was feeling better and was able to walk around without too much discomfort, so Sara decided that he was ready to go back to staying in a cell and only coming to the infirmary for daily check-ups. She had just finished telling him some exercises to do for his arm and showing him how to wrap it for when he slept at night when Bellick showed up with three other officers to escort him to his cell.
She walked with them to the door connecting the infirmary to the rest of the prison and gave him some bandages and gauze in case he needed it. She watched as the door closed behind them then turned and started walking back to her office. It was when he was watching her walk away that the first blow hit.
He was struck hard in the middle of the back and fell to the ground where he was hit again and again and again. He tried calling out to Sara for help but she couldn't hear him. All he could do was watch her walk away, and watch as she disappeared into her office without even glancing behind her. She didn't see him crumpled on the floor being kicked and hit over and over again, and she didn't see his blood falling to the floor around him.
And while the beating continued, he didn't pray for it to stop, he didn't wish for them to just kill him to put him out of his misery, he just kept saying sorry over and over in his head and asking for her to forgive him.
Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you
Well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul in
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin'