I own nothing
A/N this story is going to be kind of cheesy, but it sounded cute when I thought about it so I figured 'why not?' I'll be honest, my hopes for this aren't high, but sometimes you got to try anyway,
There was no way out, he was trapped in the dinky cabin surrounded by snow with no car, it was hopeless! He was trapped there in the living room, with her!
All she had done for hours, was cry!
He got it, he really did, kelso had cheated on her with a skank and she was heartbroken, but did that really mean he had to be nice and listen to the crying all night while he just wanted to relax in front of the fire with her dad's cognac and plan his next move with donna?
He had tried to comfort her in a way, but him pointing out that pam Macey would give it up to anyone hadn't worked like he'd hoped, and the crying continued. Donna had emerged from the room with she and Forman shared, long enough to yell at him for being an insensitive jerk and offering Jackie some platitudes, that he could read in her eyes she wasn't falling for.
But then donna had left again, and it was just the two of them again, and she was crying again, but softer this time? The loud attention seeking sobs he could ignore, but this was real, this was pain.
"look Jackie man, I know it sucks and all, but if he could do this after being together for nine months" he knew this because he'd gotten to hear her loudly proclaiming how much time he'd thrown away "then aren't you better off?" he put the question to her seriously, going so far as to lean forward in his chair and abandon his magazine.
Jackie looked up at him with tear filled eyes and blinked while she processed what he was asking
"am I Hyde? How do you figure? No one likes me, don't give me that look! You think I can't hear you all when I leave the room? I have excellent hearing and I know what you all think about me, just like I know Michael promises to break up with me when you ask him to. But he's also the only boy who asked me out before they knew I had money, sure he mooches now but it still stands that he asked me because he thought I was pretty" she explained in a soft throaty tone he hadn't known her mouth could produce, considering how shrill she usually was.
"I uh…I'm sorry man, I shouldn't have talked behind your back" Hyde apologized uncomfortably, he prided himself on being upfront and realizing he'd acted like a back-biting cheerleader was hard to stomach.
"not that it made it any easier to hear, but everything I heard you say about me you'd already said to my face…. unlike other people" she added darkly, and he just barely caught her eyes flash to the door donna and Eric were behind.
"I guess that's something?" Hyde muttered awkwardly
"guess it is" Jackie agreed sadly and pulled the pillow she held tightly against her chest.
"you know he'll apologize the next time you see him, right? Kelso's like that, he doesn't mean to be an ass, it's just that his brain can't handle more than one concept at a time" Hyde tried to make her feel better while still having his friends back.
"like the concepts of being horny and not cheating?" Jackie asked with a flash of anger
Hyde stared at her blankly, facing the choice of betraying a friend and being a liar, and he only approved of lying if it was to those in power.
"those would be a good example of what I mean, yes" Hyde admitted with a sigh.
"thought so" Jackie laughed a short humorless laugh,
"so, are you going to take him back when he shows up again saying sorry and whining like a puppy?" Hyde asked with a sneer, he didn't condone what his friend had done, most kids whose dad bailed for a girlfriend tend to have a problem with cheating, but his real contempt laid with the women who chose to believe the lies and take cheaters back, just like his mom had.
"well it's that or going back to hanging out with the cheer team, fending off football players who get handsy after two beers" Jackie said bitterly, and Hyde found himself wondering if there were any upsides to being a chick? Cus so far it sounded like a raw deal.
"are those the only two options?" Hyde asked disbelievingly, sure he wasn't up on Jackie's social status, but she had to have more than that to work with?
"I could move" she said with a hopeless shrug
He knew she was joking, but it still made his gut twist, Jackie moving away and never piercing his eardrum with her shrill bossy chatter ever again? Such an idea should have been like heaven on earth, but he found himself wanting to take that option off the table – joke or not – without really knowing why.
"be my girlfriend" he said suddenly, with a flash of ingenuity
Jackie gaped at him in utterly frozen shock.
"I'm offering to be the third option until you get over kelso and stuff" he offered already knowing it would probably blow up in his face, being nice always did.
"you hate me" Jackie pointed out the obvious flaw in his plan
"give me a reason not to" he said bluntly
"doing that would imply that I want to take you up on the offer, and I don't know that I do? You're poor and scruffy and….all you do is make fun of me" she ended her statement in a much smaller voice than she'd started it in, and for once he saw her not as a rich, spoiled bossy pain in his ass, but as a really young woman who didn't have anyone she could turn to when she had a problem, and when you don't have one person you can wholly trust maybe you spread your problems across a lot of people that don't care?
Hyde didn't get it? But to his continued surprise, he still wanted to help her out, so he decided to level with her as much as a guy like him was able to.
"look man, it'll help me out to" he said seriously
"oh really? How's that?" Jackie asked disbelievingly
"cus I got to stop this thing with donna man" he told her the truth in a low self-loathing whisper.
Jackie stared into his eyes, sizing him up and searching for the truth.
"explain" she ordered in a clipped tone.
"every day I wake up and I tell myself I'm done chasing her, I'm done wanting her, Forman loves her man and he's my best friend I can't dog him like that, but then I do it again! Every damn time I can't help myself! But maybe…" he trailed off hopelessly
"maybe if you had a girlfriend it would distract you enough that you'd get over it and not risk your friendships with either of them?" Jackie supplied softly
"yeah" Hyde breathed miserably, how the hell had it turned into him being the one that needed consoling?
"the thing about lies Hyde, is that people find them out and then you're worse off than before" Jackie pointed out heavily, her insight taking him off guard.
"I'm not talking about some elaborate lie Jackie"
"you're not?" she almost squeaked
"no man! I'm freaking asking you to be my girlfriend until were both back on our feet!" he snapped
"so, an arrangement of convenience?" she asked thoughtfully, mulling over the possibilities
"if that's what you want to call it, sure?"
"you can't cheat on me" Jackie said firmly
"same goes for you, I don't care what bullshit line kelso turns up with, while were together I won't end up the fool in it, we clear?" he said sternly
"I don't cheat!" Jackie fumed, highly offended
"you haven't been faced with a situation where you're truly tempted to!" Hyde countered vehemently
Jackie glared back at him, but eventually bowed her head, she knew what he said was right – it's easy to be strong in your beliefs when they've never been challenged.
"everyone's going to think I got with you to make him jealous, they'll all be waiting for me to run back to him the minute he begs" Jackie said quietly, toying with her finger nails in a clear indication of discomfort with the whole notion.
"you left out the part where they're going to think you paid me" Hyde grinned
Jackie looked sick at the thought, but couldn't argue its validity, Hyde was known to despise her.
"so how is this an attractive offer for me again?" Jackie asked with a sniff against the returning tears.
"I'll make sure they don't think it for long" he promised with a cocky smirk, he had an idea of how they could convince anyone around them how serious they were, even if it was nothing but a mutually beneficial arrangement.
"and how do you plan to do that?" she asked bluntly
"I figure seeing us together will convince most people that were 'together', there'll be some talk at first – there always is, but if we learn to get along with each other everyone'll shut up soon enough" Hyde said thoughtfully
"that's a good point Hyde, we don't get along." She said bluntly, her expression losing the small hope he'd given her.
"yeah, I know, but why don't we get along? "he prompted with an encouraging look
"because you're mean and poor and only like sleazy rocker girls and lumberjacks?" Jackie asked blankly, she really didn't know why they couldn't manage to get along for more than thirty seconds without firing insults at each other? When she'd first started going to the basement she'd thought he was really cool, but he hadn't returned the sentiment and she refused to beg for acceptance.
"see, it's when you say stuff like that that we run into trouble" Hyde sighed "being rich doesn't make you better than anyone else, it does however, make you spoiled and that's not a trait of yours I enjoy dealing with, there are times when I almost like you but you have a tendency to ruin it with your big mouth" he said in a tone that was strangely not mean, but like he was trying to illustrate how she alienated people accidentally as often as she did.
"well what about you? Even when I try to be friendly to you, you just laugh at me and burn me so everyone else laughs at me too" Jackie shot back defiantly, she knew she was difficult but she refused to take all the blame. "face it Hyde, the real problem with your plan is that you've never thought I was cool enough to hang around you, well, I may finish all my homework early, and I may have never gotten in trouble and I may be a square by your standards, but I am who I am and I don't apologize for it" Jackie informed him angrily, she was just about done with people telling her what was wrong with her! All she ever heard was what she should do, what she should stop doing, what she'd done wrong – she wasn't a terrible person! But she sure was treated like one.
"and that's the part of you I like until you start chattering about Andy Gibb" Hyde replied with a grin, but quickly went serious again "we've got to work out a way to not drive each other nuts" Hyde told her reasonably
"no offense, but I'm starting to think the hassle of this plan far outweighs the benefit" Jackie said with a sad sigh, she agreed that they both needed a way to move on, but Hyde's plan seemed un doable.
Hyde didn't speak when Jackie said this, instead he pulled his shades off his face and set them on the nearby table, and looked at her with a solemn expression she'd never seen on his face before.
"I came up here to try and get between donna and Forman, it backfired and now both are pissed at me, my whole life I've been called worthless and told that I'd never be a decent person, and I never believed it until I found myself trying to steal the girl my best friend loves, but I can't help myself, so I'm asking you to help me! Please Jackie, I promise I won't be a dick to you or humiliate you in front of your friends if you promise to treat me like an equal not a servant, and talk to me instead of at me" he proposed his terms without any of his usual sarcasm, and Jackie found herself wanting to help him.
Jackie rubbed her eyes wearily, it had been a long draining day and she wasn't sure she was in the best place to be making a decision like this? But the fact that Hyde wasn't suggesting an elaborate ruse to convince people they were dating, while still warring with each other, made her wonder if it might be worth it? He wasn't bad looking she thought objectively, and when he wanted to be he could be fun to be around, and privately Jackie admitted that she wasn't a very likable person but maybe Hyde could teach her how to be a bit more likable?
She didn't care what people said about her, or what they thought, but she liked the idea of having real friends, instead of the phony ones she'd always had, Hyde had real friends, maybe he'd share his secret?
"so, if I'm not bossy or spoiled, you'll be my friend?" she asked in a very small voice that he could hear the hopeful note in.
"no doll face, I'll be your boyfriend" he clarified with a grin,
"Hyde, are you forgetting that couples are expected to touch each other, kiss even?" she pointed out the main flaw in his plan, he could talk all he wanted but the fact of the matter was he'd mentioned on several occasions how repulsive he found her.
Hyde felt his mouth go dry, he'd have to lay all his cards on the table now to put her worries to rest, and considering how many of his secrets she now knew, he had to get her on board.
"it won't be a problem" he assured her off handedly
"oh, well if you say so of course I trust that implicitly" Jackie drawled with a very unimpressed expression
Hyde scrubbed his face with the heels of his hands and took a deep breath before trying again.
"it's not a big deal, we'll practice and besides, you're…kinda cute" he bailed on what he'd been about to say at the last second, it would expose him too much.
"practice how?" Jackie asked with a mixture of apprehension and confusion.
"like this" Hyde replied with a determined expression and crossed to the small sofa she sat on.
Jackie's heart was pounding out of her chest with fear, but she stayed quiet and waited to see what he meant.
Slowly enough that she could stop him if she chose, Hyde began leaning closer and closer to Jackie's face, when his lips were almost touching hers he paused.
"yes or no?" he whispered softly, giving her the chance to stop him.
"I don't know?" she breathed honestly,
Hyde chuckled softly at her indecision, she was a born romantic so she didn't want to even kiss a boy she didn't have a preexisting interest in, but she was also curios as the proverbial cat and those traits were at war with each other.
Vowing silently that he'd stop the second she wanted, Hyde closed the final distance and pressed his lips gently to Jackie's.
She was soft and warm, and tasted salty from all the tears and he would be lying if he tried to say he hated it.
Jackie's breath caught when he kissed her, she'd only ever kissed Kelso before, and that had always been frantic and a little wet now that she had something to compare it to.
Neither called a stop, but it remained chaste and tongue free as they hesitantly shifted their relationship from antipathy to whatever it would become now?
Finally, Hyde pulled away to breath, and found to his embarrassment, he couldn't meet Jackie's gaze afterwards. While Jackie was starting intently at him, her mind working in over drive.
"so, what did you think?" he asked gruffly after a while, he couldn't take wondering what she thought another second, he had his pride after all.
"I think – "but she didn't get to finish her thought,
The door burst open to reveal Kelso, covered in snow holding a passed out mostly naked Fez, before she could.
"Michael?!" Jackie shrieked in surprise, but Hyde noted that she didn't jump guiltily away from him?
"Jackie, I'm so sorry baby! It'll never happen again I promise" he told her in the sweet sappy voice that he always used to get her to forgive him when he screwed up, but this wasn't ruining a dinner she'd begged for him to attend, this wasn't destroying her favorite shoes with one of his experiments, he'd kissed another girl in front of the whole school, and it had humiliated her because for all her bragging they all knew now her deepest secret – no one gave a damn about her.
"I know it won't Michael" she agreed calmly
"oh awesome!" he cheered, dropping fez on the floor in his rush to get to her, but was stopped in his tracks by a very immovable Hyde blocking his path to Jackie.
"Hyde, move" kelso laughed and tried to shove past his friend
"her call man" Hyde told him and shot a questioning look at Jackie, she read instantly what he was asking.
Was she in or was she out?
There was no more discussing the pros and cons, it had to be now or never, and no one could make the decision but her.
"Michael, I know it won't happen again because we broke up and were staying broken up, you cheated on me and there's no pronunciation of sorry that fixes that!" she shouted at him standing firm in her decision to end their relationship for good.
"baby, if Hyde will just let me come over there I can explain and make this all better" Kelso whined like a puppy, just as Hyde said he would.
"why would I do that?" Hyde asked, raising an eyebrow curiously
"because she's MY girlfriend Hyde and we have stuff to talk about!" Kelso cried indignantly
"she's not your girlfriend any more" Hyde reminded him, then smirked "but she is mine" he dropped the four words casually, but the effect was like he'd screamed them in a crowded town square.
Kelso gaped at him while emitting a high-pitched scream, that was almost too high for humans to hear, which drew donna and Forman out of the bedroom to see what had happened?
They found Hyde and Kelso standing toe to toe, Hyde with his arms crossed purposefully and Jackie safely ensconced in the couch behind him while Kelso stared accusingly at them like they'd set a bunny on fire?
Fez was also naked on the floor, but that was the least of their worries just then.
"what's going on here?" Forman asked carefully, he wasn't in the mood to deal with a major problem just then.
"that's a good question Eric?! Why don't you ask Hyde what's going on?!" Kelso shrieked
"uh, Kelso buddy? I already did, when I came out just now and said 'what's going on here?' to the room at large, so how about someone tells Donna and I why you're both standing there like you're about to bare knuckle box?" Forman drawled irritably, it was late and he was tired and kelso's whining set his teeth on edge.
"because Eric! My ex friend Hyde here, just tried to say that he and Jackie are dating now!" Kelso screamed, waving his arms dramatically and leaning further in towards Hyde, who remained calm and unphased.
"come again?" donna said in a clipped surprised tone
"yeah Kelso, come on man, that's crazy. Hyde tell him it was a joke so he calms down and we can all get some sleep" Forman said with a laugh and waved Hyde to get on with it.
"no can do Forman" Hyde replied blankly
"why not Hyde?" Forman asked beginning to sound worried
"'cus it's the truth" he stated firmly
"no no no, that can't be true, because you two hate each other" donna denied what he'd said vehemently, shaking her head.
"no, we don't" Jackie and Hyde snapped in united annoyance.
"it's none of your business pinciotti" Hyde told her with all the calm at his disposal, he bit the inside of his cheek to keep from looking at her for signs of jealousy or regret, mostly because he knew he wouldn't see what he hoped for.
"oh, my god, you guys mean it! They actually got together!" donna cried in dismay
"of course, they did" came a slurred voice from the floor "they just told you that, don't you listen?!" Fez asked irritably, why did none of them listen to what people said? He'd been half passed out when Hyde had informed Kelso that Jackie was no longer his girlfriend, but Hyde's, and he had still been able to hear the note of truth in Hyde's voice when he'd spoken the words, it was like they were incapable of hearing a damn thing they didn't want to?!
"Jackie what the hell?!" donna cried at the smaller girl
"what are you bitching about now?" Jackie asked the annoyance in her voice hard to miss, so much so that donna recoiled a bit, she wasn't used to Jackie sounding that way.
"I…uh? I didn't know you two thought of each other like that?" donna tried to recover and save some face.
"we didn't, until we did" Jackie said with a shrug of her small shoulder, it had the benefit of being true, something that made Hyde flash her an approving smile.
"yeah, I asked her she said yes, that's all any of you need or have the right to know." Hyde told them all bluntly, his business was his business and this was not an instance where he was going to put up with his friends prying nature.
If their plan had a chance of working they needed to avoid scrutiny in the beginning, and scaring the crap out of them all was the only way he had to do that. But already his certainty that his plan had merit was confirmed, both he and Jackie were so pissed off at the people they wanted to stop harboring feelings for, that they were in no imminent danger of falling into their usual ways.
"since all of you want to act like a bunch of dill holes in MY cabin, you can all share the floor out here!" Jackie told their friends coldly, and stood up to head towards the room originally occupied by Forman and donna, a tiny twitch of her fingers signaled Hyde that he was to follow and without missing a beat, he walked briskly to her side and glanced at their shocked faces, before slamming the door in them.
Jackie heaved a few deep breaths after the nerve racking encounter, then turned the lock on the door as an afterthought.
"that went better than I expected" Hyde noted as he sat on the edge of the bed and began pulling his boots off. It was late and he was just about worn out for the day.
"that was better than you expected?" Jackie asked surprised "they barely bought it, how are we supposed to keep this up with them questioning us every second?" she asked in a tight whisper.
"you're forgetting the main point Jackie" Hyde said calmly "were not selling anything here, you and I are honest to god boyfriend and girlfriend now, they can question us and be suspicious all they please, but it won't matter - because were not lying." He reminded her again that it wasn't an elaborate lie to the world, he had asked her out albeit with some out of the ordinary circumstances.
"but how is that even going to work?" she asked while she undressed awkwardly under a nightgown she'd pulled out of the dresser "we don't have the same ideas about what going out means, I usually think of dates and gifts and going to events and dances, and you…what do you consider 'dating'?" she asked frowning with confusion, she had no idea what his views on it were, because when it came right down to brass tacks – she and Hyde didn't know each other very well.
"I've never really dated anyone before, so were going to have to play that by ear, a lot of the stuff you expect probably isn't going to happen, but I'll make an exception here and there" he mused while she crawled into the bed next to him, keeping a safe distance between them.
"so, I should lower my standards dramatically, is what you're saying?" Jackie asked dryly
"that seems like the safest thing yes" Hyde told her with a grin
Jackie turned slightly, and looked at him with large worried eyes "are we just setting ourselves up to be miserable just so we can get over people that don't give us a second thought?" she asked in a small scared voice that made him want to protect her from every damn thing in the world.
"it's not going to be easy, but look at it this way – most people start off liking each other and having fun while they get to know each other, then after they do know each other then they start to hate each other and break up. Were just working in reverse" he said thoughtfully
"you mean like, were starting from the place people usually break up and working towards liking each other and being happy?" Jackie asked trying to wrap her head around the insane concept.
"yeah man, we already know each other and we've never gotten along, but now were going to try because, let's face it, we both need to take a step back from the gang before we get eaten alive" Hyde told her heavily,
She could hear the underlying tone of hopeless desperation in his voice and it brought her up short, he'd said over and over how he needed her to help him get over donna to save his friendship with Forman, but it was only just starting to sink in how truly important that was to Hyde.
"do you really think I'll be enough to distract you from donna until you get over her?" Jackie asked in a small unsure voice, her pride hadn't yet returned from being cheated on and she didn't have the sense of self-worth she usually did.
Hyde stared at her while he thought over the question, until finally he sweetly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and smiled "if you can't, no one can" he told her quietly.
Soon they agreed that sleep was in order and they'd work out the details of what being together would mean for them – who had such different day to day lives – later.
The car ride home the next day wasn't the most fun Jackie and Hyde had ever had, not by a long shot. They'd agreed that morning before they packed up, that their best hope for pulling off their agreement, was to find some common ground so that spending time together didn't make them want to commit murder. So, when they'd started driving they'd attempted to talk quietly in the back where they were seated together, and try their damndist to come up with things they could do that didn't make the other miserable.
However, their friends made this nearly impossible by randomly shouting about how – weird, creepy, uncool, them dating was. Kelso maintained for many miles, in a loud grating tone, how wrong and against the code Hyde dating Jackie was, while Hyde simply rolled his eyes and calmly reminded him that he'd cheated on Jackie and that made her a free agent – which led to him explaining very quietly to her what a free agent was.
Fez randomly asked them to make out so he could watch, to which Forman would loudly proclaim his car a make out free zone for the duration of the trip home, while Donna just shot them the occasional suspicious look.
Hyde figured of all of them she'd be the least likely to accept what they said, seeing as how he'd tried to tell her once again how he felt about her less than an hour before he asked Jackie to be his girlfriend. His mind betrayed him and began weaving scenarios of donna coming to him and saying him dating Jackie had made her realize her own feeling for him, and he'd start to think of ways he could use Jackie to speed that process along.
But then, he'd shake himself and remember that it wasn't an elaborate lie to get the people they really wanted, they were partners in agony and he couldn't do that to the poor kid. She was like his spotter at the gym…. or his AA sponsor, she was there to save him from himself and vice versa. If they didn't break away from the path they'd been on, they were at risk of turning into people they hated, weak, sleazy people who hurt those they loved just to get what they wanted.
He didn't want to tell Jackie that the reason he'd been so confident in her being the best solution to his problem was, when she wasn't being a spoiled brat she was freakin' beautiful. And he kind of, sort of…. liked her smile…a little tiny bit.
She was a tornado of a person, she blew into a room and laid everything low in her path, he needed that to distract himself from his thoughts, because his thoughts always made him think he HAD to get donna for himself, but he'd seen the look of hurt and betrayal in Forman's eyes, and he couldn't bare to be that guy.
Then he glanced at Jackie where she was quietly writing a list of possible activities they could do together, it had been his idea – make a plan of attack to avoid mine fields like loud vicious arguments that would ruin their goal before they even got started. She was too engrossed in what she was doing to notice him watching her which gave him a rare opportunity to observe the silent Jackie.
She was so very small, it was easy to forget that or be distracted when she spoke, because her personality was so big, but with her tiny perfect face framed by the fur of her coats collar, he began to wonder why everyone was so mean to her? Yeah, she was one of the more annoying people you were likely to meet, but if you stopped and paid attention for just a second you saw that she was so young, and so eager for friends all you really needed to do to get her to stop her annoying crap was maybe just ask?
"hey Jackie" Hyde whispered softly
"yeah?" she answered absently while she chewed on her pencil eraser, deep in thought about what else they could do together in such a small town.
"don't worry too much about the list man, we'll start out just hanging out most days" he tried to ease the tension he saw in her face.
Jackie looked up at him, then back at her list, then shrugged and put it in her purse.
"I'm tired" she told him softly, she couldn't risk Kelso hearing and going into another diatribe about how they must have done it, just because they'd shared a bed through the night.
Hyde knew it was just an offhand comment, something to say just to say something, but after a split second of hesitation he shifted in his seat and laid his arm across the back of the bench.
"here, you can lean against me" he offered gruffly
Jackie blinked at him with surprise, but didn't say anything, just settled against him with her head on his shoulder, but when his arm curled around her she felt her heart start hammering in her chest.
"didn't expect that" Jackie murmured into his jacket shoulder
"go big, or go home doll face" Hyde muttered awkwardly.
It was going to take a lot of work and patience for them to last more than a week as a couple, they'd been enemies so long it was hard not to spit insults at each other at the least provocation, and then there was the part where they were working hard to find something – anything they liked about the other, instead of the usual formula in dating. But Hyde didn't mind the way it felt to have her snuggled into his chest, and he hadn't minded the way it had felt to kiss her. Sure, she was a gorgeous amazon like donna, but when she chilled out and didn't run her mouth she wasn't too bad to be around.
Jackie was surprised at just how quickly she fell asleep in Hyde's arms, or at least, she was when she woke up back in the Forman's driveway.
The first week of their arrangement was not what either would call easy, they were watched like hawks at school and in the basement, there was a none too subtle pool about them being run at school as to what their real deal was?
But they both did their best to ignore it and work on getting along, because they were having some trouble managing it. The day Jackie had picked to go over possible things they could do had been one where Hyde happened to be in a very bad mood, she'd asked him why, but he'd just grunted something at her and sat on his bed (their strategy sessions were usually held at his house because there was never anyone there), he didn't want to tell his girlfriend about how watching Forman and donna wrestle around when they'd seen the commercial for the wrestling show, had made his chest tight and made it hard to breath.
He had to hand it to Jackie, she was really trying. She didn't say a word when she'd entered his crappy dirty home to discuss what they could stand to do together, sure the look on her face had said volumes, but she'd kept any cruel comments to herself, he was almost proud of her. He'd also been surprised when she'd begun greeting him with a kiss, she'd explained that if it was they were legitimately dating it stood to reason she'd kiss him when she saw him.
What she didn't say was it was also her way of reminding herself he was her boyfriend now, because her mind kept trying to tell her Michael was still her boyfriend, she hated that she still had feeling for him or that she missed him at all! He treated her badly, she should hate him, except she didn't part of the time, but Hyde was there to help her stay strong.
"in movies and crap the guy in my position always says something like 'if you really want to be with him I understand, I just want you to be happy' but I aint that guy doll, we made a deal and were not going to cave so soon" he told her firmly when she'd admitted her problem to him after a lot of prodding on his part.
"I know! Ok, I know, it's just…. I love him" she told Hyde in a small voice
"no, you don't" he said quickly and certainly
"how would you know?!" Jackie snapped angrily, she was just a bit sick of him always acting so cool about everything, feeling was hard and it made it harder when the only person you had to talk to acted like they didn't feel anything.
"because he never did a damn thing that deserved love from you, you might like him a whole lot, you might feel puppy love or infatuation, but I've seen love up close and doll – that aint what you two had" he told her bluntly,
"who?" Jackie asked softly
"who, what?" he asked blankly
"who have you seen up close that's truly in love?" she pressed curiously, half expecting him to say donna and Eric, or how he felt about donna, but instead he laughed softly to himself and gave her a steady look.
"Mr. and Mrs. Forman"
She hadn't been expecting that, but she couldn't fault his logic, they set the proverbial bar and she knew it as well as he did.
"how long are we going to try this whole thing out?" Jackie asked then, and took a seat on the corner of his rumpled bed.
"what do you mean?" Hyde asked with a frown, not quiet following her
"I mean, it's been a long week being a 'couple', and I don't know about you but I'm not any closer to being over Micha- Kelso, and I saw you staring at Donna from behind your shades yesterday at lunch, so what I'm saying is, how long are we going to try this system before we give up?" she asked again more clearly, and with a definite current of sadness and defeat.
"do you want to quit already?" he asked in a tight voice, he knew what she said was true, but he felt oddly hurt that she was already willing to throw in the towel.
Jackie's large mis - matched eyes met his and he saw all the hurt and worry she felt in them.
"you don't like me Hyde" she said bluntly and unemotionally "and being cheated on was terrible, but having a boyfriend who wants someone else isn't actually much better as it turns out" she told him in a mature tone he'd never have expected out of her.
"look man, I'm sorry if I'm hurting you, I really thought this would help us both out" he admitted reluctantly
"and I agreed with you, but now the reality is that I have a boyfriend but in name only, I keep trying to get you to act more like a normal boyfriend and I know that's not your scene, but were in this together and it's not fair that it's all on your terms, and don't for a second think that I haven't noticed that you forget I'm there when donna's talking to you!" she said with the first hint of feeling she'd shown so far, and not surprisingly it was anger.
Before Hyde could respond, Jackie got up off the bed and began gathering her things to leave.
"are you breaking up with me?" Hyde asked trying hard to sound casual about it, but he felt bile rising in his throat at the idea.
Jackie turned to him and her face was unreadable
"I may be a spoiled brat, but I don't deserve to be treated this way by you or Michael or anyone, we decided to try being together because in a weird confusing way, we were perfect for each other. But I'm not breaking up with you because to do that you would have had to have been with me from the start, and you haven't even given me a chance. Face, it Steven, all I am to you is a beard so Forman will think you're not after donna anymore, all your crap about wanting to get over her is bullshit! As far as I've seen this 'relationship' is everything you swore it wasn't, I'm a prop to make donna jealous so she'll want you back, and who gives a damn if Jackie Burkhart gets used and abused!?" and with that Jackie spun on her heal and left the room, slamming the door behind her and leaving Hyde sitting on the edge of his bed stunned but with a lot to think about.
He'd treated her almost as bad as kelso had, which was the exact reason he'd used to convince her to help him out – that he'd treat her better! One week in and he'd already fucked that up, and the worst part was that he had to admit she hadn't acted like a spoiled annoying brat hardly at all in that week. She'd tried hard to keep her voice soft, and to ask him about bands she didn't know about instead of yammering about disco all day, she'd suggested a variety of activities she'd thought he might like instead of just her own tastes, but he'd said no to everything, even stuff he liked just because he'd been in a bad mood.
He owed her an apology at the very least, and he'd understand if she wanted to break off their arrangement already, it wasn't like they'd had a set timeline or anything, it was basically 'go out until we can't stand each other anymore' leave it to him to achieve that in seven days.
While he sat there thinking about everything Jackie had said, he realized not only that he owed her and apology, but that he didn't want to break up already? But that wasn't something he wanted to look too closely at just then, all he knew was that he'd told her she wasn't a lie he'd just lost sight of that for a while.
After about an hour of thinking, Hyde knew what he had to do.
The next day at school he strode into the cafeteria with a purpose uncommon for him, and stopped to search for Jackie in the crowded room. It was harder to spot her than usual because usually you could hear her voice across the room or spot her vibrant outfits a mile away. But today it took him longer, he finally spotted her sitting at the table with his friends, looking small and strangely subdued?
But the part that made anger flare in his chest, was that Kelso had his arm draped around Jackie while he talked to her!
Hyde stormed across the intervening space and yanked Kelso's lanky arm off of Jackie, who'd been trying hard to ignore it, and twisted the arm while growling at his stupid friend.
"what the hell do you think you're doing touching my girlfriend Kelso?" he demanded dangerously
"I uh… I was just asking Jackie what she was doing on valentine's day" Kelso admitted lamely, they both knew there was nothing innocent about what he'd been doing.
"gee kelso, what do you think MY girlfriend might be doing on valentine's day?" Hyde began in a frighteningly calm voice "do you think maybe she's going to be going out with me – her boyfriend – to celebrate? Did that possibility cross your mind?" Hyde seethed from between his clenched teeth.
"uh…" was all Kelso managed to get out before Hyde propelled him out of the seat beside Jackie and took it himself.
"hey doll" he greeted her kindly, then put his hand gently on her face and pulled her into a soft kiss,
"hi" she said shortly when they'd pulled away from each other, he could see that she was surprised and confused, but wasn't going to call him out in front of everybody, after all he'd put her through she still had his back?
"so, valentine's day huh? What do you want to do?" he asked casually, but watched the excited light start to gleam in Jackie's eyes.
He was bracing himself for a long nauseating list of tacky romantic gestures to pour out of her, but it was her turn to shock the hell out of him now.
"I thought maybe we could get some dinner at that little Italian place on tanner? Then there's a showing of Casablanca at the classic theater that night" she suggested, looking worried he'd hate her ideas, but not only was the restaurant she'd mentioned one he liked and could almost afford, but he was a fan of Humphry bogart and thought that sounded like a pretty decent date.
"sounds great doll, when should I pick you up?" he asked still using his rare sweet tone with her
"my parents always leave for the club at seven on Sundays, so seven thirty?" she suggested to spare him from dealing with her folks, for which he was grateful.
"wait Sunday?" Donna interrupted "aren't we supposed to study on Sunday?" she asked Hyde like he'd broken a promise.
"yeah, until I realized I'd forgotten what day it was, besides, I figured you and Forman had plans?" Hyde replied in an even tone, something about donna's question made him feel a twinge of annoyance?
"we do" Forman confirmed giving donna a curious look, which she refused to meet.
An awkward silence fell across the table, donna and Forman tried to have a conversation though expressions and looks, while Kelso pouted about Hyde and Jackie, whereas Fez just watched them all with a bemused smile on his face, like they were a movie?
After their valentine's date, Hyde and Jackie went back to his house as Edna would be at her favorite bar until well past dawn – if she came home at all.
Jackie felt a little nervous, and had since they'd walked out of the movie theater. She was nervous because Hyde had been looking at her with an expression she didn't understand since about half way through Casablanca. If she had to make a guess, Jackie figured that he'd decided at that point that he simply couldn't date her no matter what was at stake, and was planning how to tell her that because he'd barely spoken since they'd left their seats.
She didn't know why that thought bothered her though? It wasn't like she liked him…. did she? Honestly, she had no idea. There were times when she found herself thinking he was the sweetest guy she'd ever met, but other times she would remember that who he really wanted was donna and she would have to keep herself from crying.
"Steven, is everything ok?" she asked hesitantly after mustering all the courage she could.
Hyde stared at her with that same look and she felt her stomach clench with nerves
"wh-what is it?" she stammered in a whisper, still no answer.
She was about to demand he say something, when with a speed, she hadn't been expecting, he leaned in and caught her lips in a very different sort of kiss than he'd given her before.
She fell back onto his bed with him on top of her, one hand tangled in her hair the other on her waist, when breathing became a necessity Hyde pulled away and gazed at her with that same look.
"you're beautiful" he murmured to her, as if he was as surprised by it as she was.
Jackie smiled sweetly at the compliment, knowing he didn't lie about things to get girls, and reached up to kiss him again.
Half way through the movie Hyde had looked over at Jackie and realized he was happy there with her? He was happy that he was with Jackie? Just as he was trying to figure out what the hell was happening to him, she had offered him her popcorn without a thought while her eyes were still glued to the screen, and later when the couple on screen was saying goodbye, Jackie had grabbed his hand without noticing she had, the effect her tiny hand holding his had on him was …. unexpected.
The more he watched her, the more he found he wanted to be around her, to touch her, to be with her as more than just a boyfriend of need and convenience. So, when she had looked up at him with those huge soulful eyes, it had hit him too hard to ignore and he'd HAD to kiss her.
Their kissing turned into making out very quickly, and by the time Hyde realized they were probably moving too fast for Jackie, neither had shirts and he was in the process of unbuttoning her jeans.
"do you want me to stop?" he asked in a husky whisper, he absolutely loathed the idea of stopping, but he would if she said to.
But Jackie just bit her lip and shyly shook her head that she didn't want that, the look on her face shot straight through Hyde like a jolt of electricity and he had to stifle a groan. He kissed her again, hard, and couldn't contain the next shuddering groan when she opened her mouth and her tongue darted out to meet his, he couldn't think anymore after that and the next thing he knew he was hovering over a naked Jackie, her eyes nervous but her hands running up and down his bare chest.
"do you want to do this doll?" he asked her tenderly
"do you?" she asked biting her lip again
Hyde looked down at her laying there and nearly lost it, but mustered all the self-control he could and kept his voice steady "only if it's what you really want, if you don't its fine, I mean it" he told her seriously, he would not pressure her or make her think she had to sleep with him just because they'd gone this far.
"I want to" she whispered shyly to him and pulled his face down so she could kiss him again.
Going slowly so that she could stop him if she wished, Hyde very carefully crossed the final line between them, with an effort that he'd never imagined possible, he stopped then and looked at her to give the order to stop or keep going?
"ow" she whimpered with her eyes shut tight
"sorry!" he apologized quickly, and started to pull away, but Jackie's small hands on his hips stopped him.
"just, go as slow as you can" she told him and he felt her slowly untensing from the pain he'd caused, until her spine was no longer rigid.
He did as she asked, even though it was nearly impossible, even though every cell in his body screamed to let go and just move how he wanted, but he didn't, not until she cried out his name in a surprised – not pained voice, that was the last clear memory he had of that night.