Disclaimer: This is not actually my own idea. Over at Archive of Our Own, kellifer_fic wrote a story where Tony makes a small AI Dalek and gives him to Clint, who's been moping around after the whole 'brainwashing' affair in the movie. Clint names it Eduardo and it follows him everywhere. I couldn't get the image out of my head, and as great as Clint having a toy is, I thought Tony really needed his own. Thanks for the inspiration!

AN: The last possible thing I needed to be doing this month was writing Avengers fic. I say this because I have a 25k fic for HBB to write this month (which isn't started yet), a thesis to get back to work on (after a month off) and literally twenty other things I need to be doing work-wise. Avengers' fic was not in the cards. It is totally, completely, entirely quaggy_mire's fault. 100%. I think I'll sick Davros on her.

Chapter 1

'Please tell me that's not what I think it is.'

For a man into his forties, Tony had a worrying ability to look like an innocent five-year old. The thought was almost enough to make him smile at the sheer incredulousness of that thought, but it would rather have ruined the disapproving face he was currently going for. Or the 'What have you done now Tony and am I going to need to be the voice of reason?'

'What do you think it is?'

He could also sound like an innocent five-year old.

'I think it's a miniature remote control Dalek. Which would be fine, except that you're holding it.'

'I think I resent the implication in that statement.'

'I suppose that depends on if it's only an implication or if you've actually done something like make it fly or...'

The smirk on Tony's face was all Bruce really needed to confirm the suspicion that had entered his mind as soon as Tony had walked into his lab carrying a twelve inch red and gold Dalek.

'...or done something really stupid like put an AI in it,' Bruce finished with a sigh. 'Tony.'

'Oh, give me a break, Bruce; it's harmless! It's twelve inches tall. It can't take over the world. It can't even kill anything.'

'EXTERMINATE!' the little Dalek shouted in a ridiculously high pitched computer voice. Tony grinned.

Bruce took his glasses off, rubbed a tired hand over his even more tired eyes and gave himself a full ten seconds to contemplate when, exactly, it was that things like this became par for the course with his life.

Around about the time he moved into Stark Tower was the answer he came to, as always.

'Why did you decide you needed a miniature Dalek that has a brain of its own?' he asked the obvious question.

And got the obvious answer: 'Why not?' Tony shrugged. 'I was working on upgrades for the Mark IX and got sidetracked.'

Abandoning any semblance of returning to work in the near future, Bruce set his glasses down on the lab table and said aloud 'JARVIS, save everything, would you?'

'Of course, Dr. Banner,' JARVIS announced from that slightly above and to the right angle his voice always echoed from in this lab. Bruce still hadn't found the actual speaker.

'Thanks,' the doctor continued, already on to the problem standing in front of him. 'Where did you get a toy Dalek?'

Tony gave him a look that suggested he had, once again, asked something incredibly stupid. 'Putting aside the fact that I have minions who can run down to the nearest Toys R' Us and get me one in about an hour...Pepper gave it to me last Christmas.'

That made a strange amount of sense. Pepper would have thought it funny, Tony would have thought it was hilarious, and the Dalek would have been put on a shelf in the workshop and ignored in favour of things like R&D for the Iron Man suit. Yep, he would definitely be explaining this one to the pseudo-head of SI now. With profuse apologies for the Doctor Who marathon last week that had clearly inspired Tony's boredom tinkering.

'And, naturally, the only thing it was missing was the ability to organise a war of the kitchen utensils or something.'

Tony looked abjectly horrified. He wrapped a hand around one side of the Dalek's 'head'. 'Don't give him ideas! God Bruce, just think how horrible that would be. If the forks revolt we'll have to eat pizza for the next week in lieu of those steaks I have planned for tonight. Didn't you learn anything last week?' he declared, coming over and setting the Dalek down on Bruce's table.

Bruce eyed the thing warily. Not because he thought for one moment it would actually organise a revolution with the knives and forks, but more because he didn't put it passed Tony to have put some repulsor technology in it. Bruce didn't want burn marks all over his lab. Or himself.

'Look, he's harmless, I promise,' Tony said. Which of course meant the 'toy' was anything but. 'He just hovers a few inches over surfaces and shouts things. Watch.'

He reached a finger out and poked the Dalek.

'RELEASE ME!' it screamed and rose about six inches off the shiny table, rotating around to point its hopefully-not-weaponised gun at Tony's face. A beat later Bruce let himself relax when no blast was forthcoming.

'I made you, Russell, so I'll poke you all I like.'

'Russell?' Bruce asked, already knowing the answer.

'I didn't think Davros quite fit,' the billionaire admitted with a one shoulder shrug. 'Maybe if I build a life-sized one.'

'And are you likely to do that?' Bruce eyed the small one again.

'Depends on how bored I get with other things. It would take a bit to make a proper one. You know, flying ability and all that. Might as well AI one of the suits first. It'd be more use. Hey, you want to fly one of the suits JARVIS? Iron Man Jr?'

'While I am quite certain that would be useful for the Avengers team, sir, I will leave the heroics to you.'

Bruce gave a start at that. JARVIS had always had a measure of his creator's sarcasm, but that was a whole new level.

Tony smiled. 'I upgraded JARVIS' communication programme last week.'

'You get bored a lot, don't you?' the doctor asked, rhetorically. 'Have you shown this thing to Clint?'

'Naw, you were the first one. Besides, this lab's closer. Barton's up on the roof somewhere.'

'He is currently in the penthouse kitchen, sir,' JARVIS corrected.

'Guess even Katniss gets hungry. Come on Russell; let's go see which of you can aim better.'

'Aim?' Bruce asked.

'What; I made it fly. You think I didn't give it blasting capabilities?' Tony threw over his shoulder, already at the door.

'EXTERMINATE!' Russell yelled again from his place between Tony's hands, swivelling around towards Bruce.

The door slid shut with a near-silent hiss. Bruce relaxed back in his seat. 'I miss India,' he muttered.

'Indeed,' JARVIS agreed, matching the doctor's tone of voice perfectly. JARVIS was probably the only reason Bruce hadn't run off to a third world country yet; at least he had some sane company around the Tower.

Yeah, this is totally the start of a running series. I so don't need this right now!

The rest of the chapters will be short and sweet.