A/N: Nothing much to this. I wrote this in response to a photo manip I did awhile ago, and just now thought to post to FFN. Crossposted to AO3.

Thanks for reading!


Professor Severus Snape hadn't minded when his Potions apprentice first approached him for the occasional cup of tea. He hadn't minded when her short, half hour visits began stretching for hours at a time, and she often left his quarters long after midnight.

Truth be told, he hadn't really minded when Hermione had cornered him after dinner and kissed him in a corridor outside the Great Hall.

What he did mind was finding Potter and Weasley waiting for Hermione in the library, sniggering over a photo. Coming up behind them, he found the source of their amusement to be a photo of his and Hermione's first kiss, most likely contrived at the hands of a Creevey. At the time, he had been so shocked that she would deign to kiss him that he hadn't even responded other than to wrap his arms around her waist.

"What d'you figure she was thinking?" Weasley asked, waving the photo under Potter's nose.

Potter shook his head, snorting in amusement. "Dunno, mate."

"Surprised I'm saying this, but it's not Hermione who looks frigid," Weasley intoned in a low, serious voice.

"Pffft," Potter hissed, dropping his head to the table in a fit of laughter.

While a flicker of rage flared white hot in his mind, Severus ignored it and silently pivoted on his heel and strode out of the library, plotting retribution.

Later that evening, Hermione was sitting in his office, pouring over first year Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw essays, mimicking his grading style with angry red slashes covering the parchment.

Having always possessed a keen ear, Severus heard Potter and Weasley's snickering in the hallway before Hermione even noticed. Perhaps she would have noticed them if she hadn't been immersed in marking, but it mattered not – an opportunity had arisen.

Standing up from his chair, Severus swept around the desk and pulled Hermione to her feet. She raised an eyebrow, amber eyes reflecting a confused amusement as he pulled her against his chest.

"Severus?" She murmured as he threaded his fingers through her wild mane of curls, kissing her forehead.

"Hush," he ordered, glancing over her shoulder to confirm that Potter and Weasley were frozen in the corridor outside his office.

Dropping his head, Severus began an intimate perusal of her neck with his mouth, sucking the spots where he knew her most sensitive. She moaned, pressing her body against his as her hands fisted in his teaching robes. With his tongue, he laved the shell of her ear, eliciting a gasp as he dropped his hands to her waist, sliding a hand in between the folds of her apprentice robes to stroke her stomach.

Tipping his head up, Severus locked gazes with Potter and Weasley, adopting his most vicious sneer as he mouthed, "Frigid?"

Potter and Weasley had both paled to a sickly shade of grey, the redhead's freckles even more pronounced.

Then Hermione was moving against him, her hand seeking out the bulge in his trousers. He inadvertently moaned, then gave the Dunderheaded Duo one last smirk before wandlessly slamming his door.

Harry and Ron exchanged shocked and horrified glances before turning on their heels and fleeing the corridor.

"Never again, mate," Ron vowed, holding his stomach in disgust.

Harry nodded his head in fervent agreement.