For years she had been avoiding him. Ever since the Chunin exam she looked with fright at him, she ran away, just as a coward she promised herself she would never be. She told herself being scared was not a trait a ninja should have. She tried to convince herself that she had to keep her head high and never show how terrified she was of him, but it never worked. She kept staring at the ground, running away, stumbling on every word. The day her father told her she had to marry him, she fainted disgracing herself. Her father scolded her, threatened to take away the leadership from her, but yet she could not control the reaction of her weak scared mind. After their marriage she was even more scared, but to her surprise nothing happened. He did not come to her their wedding night, nor any night that came after it. He insisted on moving out of the compound, just to almost vanish from her life. They house Lord Hyuuga bought for them was large, so avoiding each other came easily. She made sure there was always dinner for him in the fridge, and he made sure she spend as little time as possible with him.

After several months it began to bother her. First it began when her father asked when will they have their first child, then it was her friends hesitant questions about where her husband was, and why wasn't he there with her. Later it was her own head, asking questions about where he was, and what he was doing. Later it was herself asking that one painful question, with who he was spending his time… In the past years she always thought of Naruto as her future husband, he thought of him as the father of her children and man to spend her life with, but reality as different. Neji was her husband, and he was to be the father of her children. As much as she never wanted him to be her husband, each day the need of having children drilled a hole in her heart. Her father's questions only made it worst, she always wanted to have children but she could not have them on her own. It takes two people to make children, and she did not dare find a man outside of wedlock to do it.

She was not jealous of him at all, for all she cared he could spend his life as he pleased, as long as she had what she wanted. It would even be better that way, she would have the child she desired so much, and he would be free to do whatever he wished.

Making up her mind was just the first step, she knew she had to overcome fear to come close to him, she felt she would probably have to drag him away from another woman, she knew she would have to overcome her inexperience and shyness, but she would do everything to get her child. She never thought of it as of their child, it would be HER child.

At first she just watched him, coming in and out of their house. Eating, training, meeting with his team. She would see as he went to the Hokage, as he went about the village, to the cemetery to his father's symbolic grave. She would see him meeting with her father about clan business. And nothing more. It really made her wonder, the only woman in his life was Tenten happily married with Lee and already with child… And men in his life, well that was a possibility she couldn't believe…

Then she tried something else, overcoming her shyness, she stopped avoiding him. Whenever he came home dinner would be warm on the table, not in the fridge. She would be somewhere around to greet him. She suggested that they should paint the house, and maybe even furnish the empty rooms, to which he calmly agreed. They began spending more time together, but that was not her goal at all. She wanted a child, not a roommate! She tried but deep inside she was too scared and too shy. And she felt that going further was far beyond the things she could do. She knew she could just tell him that she wanted to have a child and that he would probably do it for her, but deep inside that didn't feel right… She wanted him to come for her, she wanted him to want her, and not just to fulfill some breeding duty. She was tangled in her own web, she still wanted the child, but she did not want to force him to it anymore. The soft side of her kept whispering that it was not right to force him to sleep with her, that it was not right to seduce him or to primitively demand he made her a child. After many weeks she just gave up, gave up all hope. She proved that she was as weak as before, she accidently hurt herself finding out that her own husband was not interested in her at all.

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Neji did not like complicated things, and this last mission was too troublesome and difficult. Things just kept going wrong, first Lee got injured, then they lost their way, then they were attacked, and finally they were ambushed. The rescue team he had sent for did not come in time, and with his teammate injured, and with two inexperienced Chunins this mission was doomed to fail. He did his best, fighting off the attackers, he did his best killing two of them and injuring three others, but he had no way to stop the poison flowing in his veins, and he had not one to call for help.

Just as he looked the last time at the dark sky above him, he kept thinking of her. His doom, the doom of their marriage. She would finally be free from him, and even though it shouldn't it really made him happy. She would live her life as she wanted, find another husband who she would love. Find happiness, and that was all he could wish for. It would repay all they hurt he had caused her, all the suffering and pain. He welcomed death smiling inwardly.

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She was called to the hospital just after she came home from training, she knew immediately something bad must have happened. When she saw him, unconscious and half dead, she realized she did not want him to die. She stayed with him, taking care of him, listening to the medic nin's discussions about him. She watched them trying to cure him, trying to drag the poison out of him. She changed the cloth on his forehead trying to fight off the high fever, she held his hand and whispered words of comfort. They told her there was little chance, they told him they were unable to do anything more. Not even Sakura, not even Tsunade were able to help him. Tsuande said there is no way to save someone who wants to die. Hinata could remembered his words, that only in death he would be free from his curse mark, and from his real curse which was her. It was then she made her decision, one of the most significant in her life. She told them she wanted to take him home. She said she did not want him to die there, in the cold white room of the hospital. She was his wife, and she would take care of him. They did not oppose her wish, she got the medicine that Tsuande made to ease his pain, she got all the support and comfort she could get from her friends.

That night she gently hugged him trying to bring him comfort, whispering that death was just another way of running away, not freedom, but one more cage. She held him tightly and fought for him with all her strength. Sometimes she felt a response, a whisper, a movement, but it took a long time before he whispered her name. Tsunade came to see him next morning, and gave her some more drugs for him, and expressed her surprise that he even reacted to anything. The fever was still high, but he began responding, mumbling him his agony, reacting to light and touch. Days passed, and his condition was steadily improving. Tsuande made a comment that the care of a loving wife can do much more than any medicine. His fever was still high, but the last blood tests showed that his body was slowly fighting off the effects of the poison. After almost ten days Sakura declared that his life was no longer in danger, and that the worst was behind them, which lit a candle of hope in Hinata's heart.

After two weeks from the lethal attack on him, Neji opened his eyes, and noticed he was in their room, the room no one ever lived in, but which was meant for them as a marriage. She was sleeping next to him, tired and a mess. He touched the compress on his forehead and looked around at the countless medicine bottles on the bed table, and at the tiny hand holding his. He fell to sleep peacefully.

She woke up in the middle of the night feeling his arms wrap around her, he instinctively put her head on his chest and fell back to sleep.

They both woke up early in the morning, he still had a fever and a headache, but the soft response of her body next to his made him forget about those minor inconveniences. She was surprised to find herself so close to him, but seeing that he was awake and conscious made her hug him even closer in joy. Before he could stop himself he leaned down and gave her a kiss. He could see her wild blush, her surprise. It was just a minute before she ran away from him.

The next days were full of taking care of him. He was still ill, but Tsunade was able to help him in his condition faster than before. Hinata spent the nights next to him, but as far away as possible trying not to disturb him. He began walking around the house, and slowly everything went back to normal. They still slept in their one bed, she still looked around after him making sure he was alright, and he kept telling her bitterly that now he could take care of himself again.

In a way he was disappointed they managed to save him, he felt bad being so weak that someone had to help him with so many things and that someone had to take care of him. He could remember how she ran away from him, how she kept her distance as if he was poisonous himself and it hurt him more than anything. He was determined to get well as soon as possible, and just after five weeks from his last mission he recommenced his duties as a ninja. Lord Hiashi suggested that maybe he should give it all up and concentrate more on the clan business but Neji had to prove to himself that he was worth something. That he was not helpless.

He was bitter towards Hinata, and he avoided her even more than before. The only thing that didn't change was their sleeping arrangement. The bed was big enough for both of them so they could easily avoid touching each other. He liked looking at her in her sleep, and even when she tried to move back into her old room, he suggested that she should stay and that he would move back to his old room. But he didn't, he just stayed there with her. Quiet and distant but always there.

One day he saw Shino Hianta's former teammate and now leader of the Aburame clan. He demanded if Neji had time to talk. Neji had to listen about how he was bad towards Hinata, about how she cared about him, and she fought for his life. He heard many bitter words aimed at him, and he knew it was all his fault. It was all his fault. When Aburame finally left him speaking out his last accusations, Neji could only think about what he did to her, what he kept doing to her. And he kept wondering how to fix it.

He wandered around their house, aimlessly, thinking about how he only signified pain in her life. A lot has changed in it he noticed, he remember about how she said she would like to furnish some rooms and redecorate them, but what he saw was amazing. Almost every room was finished, most in pastel calm colors, nice wooden furniture. Even his office was repainted and everything was placed in a new order. His old room was repainted as well, the only room left alone was the one she prepared first, their bedroom. The last room made him stand there forever in shock. He just stood there afraid to come in, it was painted in light pastel blue. There was a soft dark blue carpet on the floor, toys on the shelves, a small bed, and all the other things needed when having a child. He could feel cold clutch his heart, the room was perfect, it had everything in place, she must have spent many days and hours working on it, planning it, and for what? For a child that was not even conceived yet. For a child that would probably be not his, a child she did not want to have with him. He clutched his fists feeling the anger raise and the pain fill his heart. But instead of letting it all go he buried it deep inside, falling to his knees and crying it away so that no one would ever know about it.

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