True Love Sparkles Sometimes

by teamclaitlin

Zacky Vengence is new to school, and he meets a beautiful new boy. This boy's name is Edward Cullen, and Zacky finds himself drawn to him in more ways than one... But does Edward really like him or does he want him for something else alltogether?

Title: True Love Sparkles Sometimes

Author: Claitlin

Rating: PG-13

Paring: Zacky Vengence / Edward Cullen

Warnings: until someone proves zacky vengance is actually male, this isn't mpreg.

CHAPTER ONE

Zacky Vengence had mean mean parents who made him move to a new town, but when he got into his new school, he suddenly saw the most beautiful dude in the world, and decided to go make a move on him. He walked up to the beautiful dude in between classes and gave him his most dazzling smile. The beautiful dude looked at him and blinked.

"I'm Zacky," said Zacky.

"I am EDWARD CULLEN," said Edward Cullen.

"Listen," said Zacky. "I am lithe and beautiful and am new to school. Wanna bite me with your sexy teeth and then grind on each other?"

"HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS A VAMPIRE," said Edward Cullen.

"...what?" asked Zacky.

"Nothing," said Edward Cullen.

"Wanna come over for a sleepover later?" asked Zacky, winking at Edward Cullen.

Edward Cullen shrugged and nodded.

So, Edward Cullen came over, and they watched a scary movie, and then Zacky climbed into his lap and tried to stick his tounge in Edward Cullen's mouth. And then dragged him up to his room for their 'sleepover'. And then there was grinding and Zacky was all, "Hang on, I recognize you!" He looked down at his Twilight shirt and then up at his Twilight poster.

"Holy shit," he said, his mouth dropping open. Edward Cullen rolled his eyes. "But wait," said Zacky. "Aren't you supposed to be straight?" Edward Cullen looked at him funny.

"Wait..." he said suspiciously. "You mean Bella DOESN'T have a penis? I had my eyes closed and just assumed I was sticking it in the right hole." Zacky's mouth fell open. He pulled off his Twilight shirt, holding up the depiction of Edward Cullen and Bella's love so he could see.

"Yeah," he pointed at Bella. "See, she's a lady."

Edward Cullen gave him another look and pulled Zacky's Hannah Montana comforter over his sparkly chest sheepishly.

"Yeah, I guess we had sex and it was radd or something. I am going to sleep now."

"I thought you didn't sleep...?" said Zacky.

"Well your mom pretty much wore me out last night," said Edward Cullen.

"What?" said Zacky.

"Nothing," said Edward Cullen. Suddenly, the chirping of a cell phone rang out through the room.

"Hang on," said Edward Cullen, pulling out his phone and answering it. "Bella? Yeah- no, I won't be home for a while. Shut the fuck up, it's your kid too! Christ you're the one who asked me to knock you up I didn't ask to have to listen to you whine for the rest of my life. Yeah, fuck you too." Edward Cullen hung up the phone and turned back to Zacky, who looked horrified.

"But...but weren't you in LOVE?" he cried, pulling at the hem of his Twilight shirt. Edward Cullen raised an eyebrow.

"If I loved her, would I be doing THIS?" he asked, as he stuck his hand down Zacky's pants. Zacky wiggled and shook his head 'no'. He put his arms around Edward Cullen's neck and drew him close.

Zacky woke up suddenly in the middle of the night with a tummyache. Edward Cullen was just laying at there, staring at him. "Hi," said Zacky. Edward Cullen kept staring. Zacky blinked. "I...just gotta go pee real quick," he said. Edward Cullen stared. Zacky wriggled out of bed and went into the bathroom. He pulled out his phone and hit speed dial. The phone rang for a minute. "This is the Bronx Baby Base Camp, how can we help you," came a tinny voice on the other end of the line.

"Peeeeeeeeete?" said Zacky. "I need your advice..."

CHAPTER TWO

When Zacky told his band what happened, they all immediately went to the doctor's office. They checked in as 'Avenged Sevenfold, party of 5', and all the nurses looked at them funny before leading them all to an exam room.

Synyster Gates looked down ominously at Zacky's new baby bump.

"That's supposed to be MY demon seed in there," he muttered.

"Yeah," said Zacky, "but it was Edward Cullen, what would YOU have done???"

Just then, Dr. Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III walked in. He was a short lil' dude with glasses that had no lenses and were clearly just there to make him look smart, and spiky hair that fell in his eyes. He was holding a clipboard and studying its contents curiously.

"Say, Pete...?" asked Syn. "Why do you make us call you doctor?"

Pete gave him a scrutinizing look.

"'Cause I like to roleplay."

"What?"

"Nothing," said Dr. Wentz. "So, Zacky," he asked. "What's good ol' Eddie like in bed? That sparkly dick everything it's cracked up to be?" Zacky spluttered.

"HE IS A CARING AND TENDER LOVER," he said. Syn sighed wistfully and Dr. Wentz nodded solemly.

"Well, you're pregnant again." Dr. Wentz sighed like it was something he'd seen all too much. "Are you sure you're a dude?"

"YES I AM A DUDE GOSH," yelled Zacky defensively.

Dr. Wentzmade several 'hmmm' noises, before he looked down and spent several minutes silently staring at Zacky's baby bump. Zacky shifted uncomfortably before crying out, "Stop lookin' at me like that!" he sighed dramatically. I'm not some piece of meat, Briiiiiiiiian, make him stop." Syn jumped and looked guilty, dragging his eyes away from the curve of Zacky's lil' tummy.

"Are you even a real doctor?" asked Johnny Christ. The doctor waved his hand in dismissal and went back to scrupulously studying his clipboard.

"I'm going to need to see your penis," Dr. Wentz said.

"THERE IS NOTHING WRITTEN ON THAT CLIPBOARD," said the Rev as he rummaged through his backpack for snacks.

"Oh. I guess there isn't," said Dr. Wentz, tossing the clipboard out the window jovially. "Undress, please!" he said to Zacky. Zacky looked more uncomfortable then an uncomfortable thing.

CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!