"Ughhhh!" the annoyed Salamander whined for the tenth time that day as they boarded the train that would take them back to Magnolia.

"Natsu I'm sorry! I didn't notice what was happening!" I apologized. Again. Team Natsu (now with Lisanna) had gone on a mission to destroy a small dark guild a few train stops away. The mission had been going great when Lisanna slipped on the guild's roof, nearly plummeting to her death. I, Lucy Heartfilia, being the only one on the roof with her, jumped and grabbed her hand, pulling her back up to safety, but, unfortunately, also allowing the group of guild members that we had been ordered to keep outside and on the roof of the guild in before the inside half of the team was ready to deal with them.

Lisanna had been the first to stand out of the two of us and as she was offering her hand to me, Natsu caught sight of us. Immediately jumping to conclusions, he accused me of sitting down on the job and putting Lisanna in danger. Now, generally, I would have exploded at this, knocking his head to the wall like a coconut, but when I saw Lisanna shrink away from Natsu's anger as she began to confess that it was her fault, I cut her off, telling Natsu that it was, in fact, all my fault and reversed our roles as I recounted what happened.

We had still completed the mission, of course, but now the whole team was mad at me, minus Lisanna of course. "Natsu, please listen, Lucy was-" Lisanna began again, but was cut off by Gray.

"We know, Lucy just wasn't prepared. We're just happy you caught her in time!" He smiled warmly over at Lisanna, who sighed in defeat, something I just had to chuckle at. Hearing my slight laughter, Lisanna looked at me and mouthed 'you don't have to do this'. I just shook my head and shrugged, shooting her another smile. She smiled weakly back before retuning her attention to the new conversation.

We had just gotten to our seat and everyone had taken one except for Lisanna and I. Seeing the predicament of there only being one seat left, I turned on my heel and sat down on the other side of the carriage, alone in my own box. Lisanna shot me another worried look but I motioned for her to sit with them.

"Are you sure, Lucy-chan?" Her voice was small and tentative, even though Natsu was already pulling her down next to him.

I laughed, happy to see the two old friends near each other again, no matter how badly broken beyond repair my heart was. "Don't worry, I can read in peace over here! Plus, it's the least I can do to thank you! And for the ladt time, call me Lucy!" Understanding, although not seeming to fully approve, she nodded, looking back to the group she was with. Within minutes, they were hollering with laughter, not exactly helping the pain in my chest as I peaked out over my book to them.

Ever since Edolas, Lisanna had been denying missions, but now, a month and a half later, we had finally gotten her to accept. During the short time together, Lisanna and I got along extremely well, but that doesn't mean that my heart didn't break every time I saw the way Natsu looked at her, or when he would ignore me in the morning and not show up at night, all to spend time with Lisanna. I had to admit, I missed my space heater and his obnoxious blue feline, but it was good to see old friends reunited.

I knew that every day, Lisanna, Mirajane, and the other girls of Fairy Tail, minus Erza, all saw my pain. Though they as well were happy for her return, they knew that it had quickly shattered everything I had built up with Natsu. In he blink of an eye, I wasn't even existing to him, but a background figure in his and Lisanna's love story.

But I didn't say a word. Every day, I went to the guild with a smile on my face, talked with the girls, read, and sat a bit with Team Natsu before making some see-through excuse and leaving before my tears could break through. I had grown accustomed to waking up a bit earlier in the morning in order to put on the extra make-up necessary to hide the dark circle and red blotches under my eyes from crying all night long, but Mira had begun to see through them the other day.

I held my head a bit to steady it as I sat down at the bar. I was so absorbed in trying to right myself that I didn't even notice when Mira put my morning orange juice next to me. "Lucy, are you okay?" she asked when I made no move totals the drink.

Hearing her voice, my head shot up and I sent the motherly barmaid a smile, attempting to ease her worries. "of course Mira!" her eyes narrowed a bit, but when she was that I wasn't going to cave to her anytime soon, she huffed. About twenty minutes later, she came back, a sneakily-vicious look on her face that made me swallow hard.

"so, if everything's fine, then how are you and Natsu?" she was trying tk her a reaction out of me. I felt my body go stiff she and Levy were the only ones that had been given my outright confession one (very drunken) night. They never let it go, saying that "Drunk words are sober thoughts" or something like that.

I glared deeply at her, an equally wicked thought entering my mind. "Another word about this to me or anyone and the world knows about Fried." her face went a ghostly white. The other night, I had heard her and Fried doing some not-so-polite activities in the kitchen behind the bar.

I chuckled, remebering how quickly she had dropped the subject, but cotinued to shoot me constant troubled glances. Others soon began to follow, realizing my disheveled appearances had to be for a reason, but I continued to brush them off, hoping that they would give up soon.

I didn't even want to even go on this mission, as it happened, but I was in desperate need of money and in order to do what I had decided on weeks ago. I had wanted to leave when they were on a mission, this mission to be exact, but it looked like I would have to wait until the next one.

Before I knew it, we were pulling into Magnolia. I stood quickly in order to keep up with the lovable dragon slayer, who was now bouncing away from the train in glee, but by the time I had gotten my bag, I saw Team Natsu already exiting the train station.

With a sad, knowing smile on my face, I followed, but went back to my house instead of the guild. I unlocked the door to my nearly empty apartment, having all my stuff packed in boxes with Virgo in the spirit world, waiting for me to settle down in another place, another town far from here where I could start over without denying this heart break like I had been doing for so long.

A tear slipped past my defenses as I grabbed one of my few remaining pieces of unpacked clothing. It was a jacket I had worn a few weeks ago, but that's not what made my heart drop. Wrapped within the jacket was five boxes, each containing another form of a charm that was inscribed "Team Natsu" on the front and "Fairy Tail's Strongest" on the back. Happy's was designed to be a collar, Natsu's a bracelet, Gray's a necklace charm to go on with his sword, Erza's to be a low hanging pendant, much like one of the pieces of jewelry that she had been drooling over a few weeks ago, and mine a choaker. I would have bought one for Lisanna but this was before we had ever gone to Edolas. I meant to give them out, but always felt shy when thinking about giving flame head a gift. I didn't think my heart would be able to take it if he rejected me outright like that, much like he had recently begun to, despite Lisanna's constant efforts to keep him with me.

I quickly swiped away the stray tears as I realized just how dark my room had gotten. It had been mid day when we returned, so how long had I been sitting there, wallowing in self pity? I looked outside, seeing the utter pitch black of the night and sighed. I changed and slid into bed, shutting the window behind me and locking it, knowing that without my protective dragon slayer, leaving the window open was a dangerous thing.

But the moment the idea of just how vulnerable I was without him got into my head, I began to sob, his name involuntarily escaping my lips over and over again until strong arms engulfed me. I turned and threw my arms around my loyal lion spirit, digging my face into the nook between his collar bone and neck.

He stroked my back, hushing me softly until my sobs recessed to hiccups and hiccups became sniffles. Slowly, he pulled back just enough to see my face, waiting for me to make eye contact with him. The moment I did, I saw the determined anger burning deep within his sad eyes and inwardly shuddered at the thought of who had done what to deserve Loke's anger. "Princess, do you want to leave tomorrow instead of waiting? I believe that there is no use in staying any longer and prolonging your sadness-"

I put my hand up, cutting him off. I knew I couldn't handle hearing much more of his honestly words, but I nodded, knowing he was right. I had been staying for selfish reasons, hoping Natsu would suddenly realize that he loved me and not Lisanna and come running to my side, begging for forgiveness and confessing his undying love.

Inwardly, I laughed with dry humor at the thought. No, he would never do that because he was in love with Lisanna, not that I blamed him. She was gorgeous, stunning, on the inside and outside, a pure maiden (not that I wasn't), not to mention his best friend. I had nothing against her and what hurt me the most, besides seeing the way that he looked at her, was seeing how quickly she had taken my spot with nearly everyone, even Levy, who had cancelled our trip to the bookstore and mall to fill Lisanna in on the guild's romances and all the best books that had come out since she had left. So I really was just a replacement...

As Loke shifted behind me, laying me down, I felt him arms slowly retreat, but when I made a move to grab for him, I felt him stiffen. "Lucy..." he whispered sadly. I had never asked him to stay the night with me before, but at this moment, I needed someone to be with me, just to hold me and make me feel safe once more. I didn't even have to respond. He slowly slid back into bed with me, holding me tight to his chest as I drifted off to another night of dreamless slumber.

I will always try to update weekly, but no promises because of homework and work :/ but still, i hope you like it so far, and no, I'm not a NaLi fan, but I won't hate her either. I will just hate the idea of her and Natsu together... XD But I promise, it gets a lot happier after this chapter, well, progressively at least. It will end up in NaLu...eventually... :)

Please Review so I know how you all feel and feel free to PM me if you want to say or discuss anything else!

~The Infamous Smiles of Mona Lisa