The song in this story was chosen by my dear friend Cecilia, she is a huge inspiration to me, and we met through my stories. She is one of a kind, so dear darlin', this is for you!
To everyone else, please enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own the lyrics used in this story.
Dear Darlin'
The superstar was sitting by his table writing a letter, trying to put his feelings into words. Normally he would never have trouble with putting his feelings into words – he had made so many songs about his feelings. But this time… it was different, it was harder. His hands were shaking, and he could not stop them. It was all not normal. He had never been like this before. He had never lost a girl after such a short time… and never like this time. It hurt him. It hurt him not to have her there with him. It had lasted for like only two months, and it just fell apart.
He had written a song about this… about writing the letter to her, because he had tried so many nights as he had been sitting alone in his apartment feeling cold and alone. He had started this letter so many times, but it was like he could not get the words out on paper in full sentences. He tried once again.
Dear darlin',
Please excuse my writing. I cannot stop my hands from shaking while I write this letter.
I have tried so many times, and it just simple will not work out for me. It is simple; I miss you,
and nothing hurts like not having you here with me. And even worse, no one understands what
we went through. Everything was so short. It was so sweet. We really tried.
Dear darlin', please excuse my writing.
I can't stop my hands from shaking
'Cause I'm cold and alone tonight.
I miss you and nothing hurts like no you.
And no one understands what we went through.
It was short. It was sweet. We tried.
Flashback… two and a half months earlier…
He went into the coffee shop; he just needed a cup of coffee after the long day in the studio. He was so exhausted, and he had almost run from the paparazzi outside the studio to his car. He had just pulled up in front of his favorite coffee shop in town and made his way in. He swung the door open. He had still his shades down, in the hope that no one would recognize him. Just as he walked through the door he bumped into a girl, who spilled her coffee down her white shirt.
"God, I'm so sorry!" he said as he moved his shades to look at her.
"How about you look where you're going?" she snapped as she grabbed some napkins from the table beside her and tried to dry her shirt, without any luck. The girl with the light tanned skin and long dark hair sighed.
"I'm sorry," he said once again, "let me buy you a new cup of coffee and…" he looked at her, "well, maybe also a new shirt."
She sighed, "no, no, it's okay."
"No, please, let me," he insisted.
"If you insist," she sighed and looked at him with her dark brown eyes.
"I really do insist!" he smiled and scratched his neck.
"You are…" the girl suddenly realized who was standing in front of her.
"Sch!" he shushed, "please don't say it out loud, let's just try and be little private here."
The girl nodded, "okay."
"Thanks," he said, "so what are you drinking?"
"Just a black coffee," the petite girl smiled at him.
"Very well then," he smiled, "anything else? It's on me," he offered.
"No thanks," she smiled at him.
"Okay," he said, "do you've time to sit down and drink it with me in the corner over there?" he pointed to the corner.
"Uhm, yes," the girl said not really sure if it was right to do that, but since he was buying her coffee she felt like she needed to.
"Okay, then go sit down, and I'll come with the coffee," he said. She did as he asked her to, and shortly after he had come to the table with two cups of black coffee, one for her and one for him.
"Thank you," she said nervously.
"Hey, you're welcome, I owe it to you since I made you spill the other cup on yourself," he scratched his neck again.
"Well," she smiled, "if you say so."
"I do," he smiled.
"What brings you here? Shouldn't you be out on a big tour or something?" she asked with a low voice leaning closer to him over the table.
"Nah, not right now, I just got home, you see," he said smiling.
"Oh, right," she said twisting a lock of her hair.
"You're not following me, are you?" he chuckled lightly.
"No, not really," she admitted. "I just read a bit about you in the magazines, but I'm not like a huge fan of yours, I'm sorry," she said looking down at her cup of coffee.
"Yes!" he said smiling.
"Why are you glad about that?" she giggled.
"Because that means you don't have a bunch of expectations to me," he chuckled, "right?" he asked.
"Right," she smiled.
"Thank you!" he smiled, "so, what's your name?"
"My name is Gabriella," she smiled shyly.
"What a beautiful name," he smiled. "What more?"
"Uhm," the girl bit her lip not sure if she should tell him, but she did it anyway, "Gabriella Montez."
"Beautiful," he said, "Gabriella Montez," he said it like he was tasting her name. She looked at the boy with the shaky brown hair and light blue eyes and smiled. "So what does Gabriella Montez do beside drinking coffee?"
She giggled, "I'm a teacher at East High School," she said.
"Oh, so you're a teacher, what do you teach?" he asked interested.
"I teach math and chemistry and then I have the drama team too," she said.
"Interesting," he smiled, "so you're a bit of a… well, excuse me, nerd?" he asked scratching his neck once again.
She laughed, "Yeah, I'm a nerd," she admitted.
"A beautiful one," he smiled.
She blushed, "thanks," she said.
"So a beautiful, young, nerdy teacher," he smiled, "is she doing anything tonight?"
"Not that I know of," she smiled at him.
"Would you join me for dinner, as an apology for the incident before?" he asked.
"You've told me you are sorry," she smiled, "you don't have to apologies anymore," she said.
"But I really want to get to know you a bit better," he said, "you're fascinating me," he admitted.
"Am I?" she asked surprised.
"Yes, have you never heard that before?" he asked just as surprised as her. He found this petite girl, with her long dark brown, curly hair and her dark brown eyes so fascinating. Something made him want to know everything about her, just everything. Every little detail about her life, her childhood, who she was and how she became this person. Her smile was mesmerizing. Her laugh was like sweet music in his ears. Her eyes was like diamonds. She was just simply fascinating.
"No, I haven't," she blushed.
"Well, you do," he said and leaned in over the table, "so please, have dinner with me!"
"Okay," she gave in, "but I have to go home and change, I can't go out with you like this," she said and looked down at her shirt with the dried coffee spots.
"I think I know someone, who can fix that," he said, "the shop just across the corner, I know the owner, and I think she can help you out with a new shirt and everything you want to get ready for dinner with me," he smiled.
"I can't take that," she said ashamed, "I have clothes at home, I can just go home and change," she said.
"You're not used to people wanting to pay for you or wanting to give something to you, are you?" he chuckled lightly.
"Not really," she admitted, "I've been brought up to take care of myself, so yeah, I never really accept things from people."
"Well, you'll just have to do that with me," he said and grabbed her hand, "let's go," he said and almost dragged her out of the coffee shop.
"Hey," she said, "wait, why are you doing this?"
"Because I think you deserve it, for not ripping my head of, when I basically ruined your shirt," he said, "and because you fascinate me!"
"But… you don't even know me," she said.
"No, but I want to get to know you," he said, "come on, please, just let me buy you a new shirt at least, please?"
"Okay, just a new shirt," Gabriella said looking directly into his eyes, "okay?"
"Okay, only a new shirt," he agreed.
They went over the street and bought a new shirt for her, and left for dinner at a small restaurant, where he also knew the owner, so they got a table by the back of the restaurant so they could sit in private and talk without anyone disturbing them.
"So tell me about yourself," he said as they had ordered.
"Well," she said, "what do you want to know?"
"Everything," he said.
"Everything, really?" she asked.
"Yes, everything," he answered, "did you live here your entire life or did you move here? Do you have a boyfriend? Do you have a family? Where do they live? Just everything."
They sat there talking for hours. He kept asking her questions, and the more he got to know about her, the more she fascinated him. A young girl, at the age of 26, whom had lost both of her parents in a car accident 4 years ago, she was now a teacher, just like her father was, and she loved it. She wanted to make a difference in people's lives she wanted to help the children to have a great future and help them to accept themselves as they were. She was single, and it did not bother her, because she spent so much time preparing for her classes and the drama team. She enjoyed every single minute she spent with those children. Her eyes lit up, when she told about them. And there he sat. Just a singer.
The night came and they had to leave and get to their separate homes.
"So, Gabriella Montez," he said and grabbed her hand over the table, "can I see you again?"
She smiled shyly, "will you?"
"Of course I will!" he smiled.
"Then yes, you can see me again," she smiled.
"Let me have your number, then I'll call you tomorrow," he said.
They exchanged numbers and got up to leave the restaurant.
"Thanks for a lovely day," she smiled, "it was not what I expected, when I left the school this afternoon," she admitted.
"Thank you for an inspiring day," he smiled, "I'm glad I bumped into you," he chuckled.
"As odd as it sounds," she smiled, "so am I," she looked at him, "you're just so different in real life from what they write about you," she admitted.
"Uhm," he scratched his neck, "thanks, I think?"
She giggled, "it's positive, really!"
"Good," he chuckled.
"I should go catch my bus," Gabriella said looking towards the bus stop.
"I can take you home," he offered.
"No, it's okay, I can take the bus," she said.
"I insist, it's because of me it's now late," he said, "and I can't let you take the bus now, it's late and you never know, who's in the streets now."
"Well," she smiled, "I usually can take care of myself," she said.
"I know," he smiled, "but please, let me take you home."
"Okay, but only because you're begging to," she smiled.
"Thank you," he chuckled and led her to his car and they drove off. He got her home safely and they said their goodbyes before he went home.
End of flashback…
He sighed; their first meeting had been so weird, and yet so perfect. And from that day they had been texting each other every minute of every day, and they talked on the phone every night. He got to her place for dinner and they hand out. It was all-great. They had even come to the part where they actually said they were a couple. But soon the paparazzi had found out and they had started to follow them, when they were out. And soon Gabriella was no longer his secret; she was now a public girl. And soon the rumors started swirling around.
I know things have been hard. And the paparazzi are not making it any easier.
I know you hate them, and I am sorry for bringing you into this. It was never my
intention, I hope you know that.
I hope these words will make you understand, that being away from you, and
not having you here with me is the hardest thing I have ever had to cope with.
I hope my words will break through the wall that you have built up around you,
because I meant it all. Not a single thing that I did with you was a lie – everything
with you were so very true.
I miss you, and nothing will ever hurt me just as much as it hurts to be without you!
And if my words break through the wall
And meet you at your door,
All I can say is "Girl, I mean them all."
Dear darlin', please excuse my writing.
I can't stop my hands from shaking
'Cause I'm cold and alone tonight.
I miss you and nothing hurts like no you.
And no one understands what we went through.
It was short. It was sweet. We tried. We tried.
Flashback… one month earlier…
He had come to her place with flowers. "Hey babe," he greeted her as she opened the door.
"Hi," she sighed.
"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked as he rushed inside and put the flowers on the dresser in her hall.
She had tears in her eyes, "the stories in the magazines…" she sobbed.
"Darling," he sighed and pulled her into his arms. "There is nothing in them," he said, "that girl from the magazine, I don't know, who she is, she just came up to me, when I was out with the guys, and she sat down with us, really close to me, and the paparazzi got pictures of her trying to get to me, but I pushed her away, and obviously they didn't care to tell that part of the story." He sighed, "I'm so sorry for this," he kissed the top of her head.
The tears streamed down her cheeks, "but…" she looked up at him, "if it isn't true, why are they writing those things?"
He sighed, "you don't believe me?"
"I really want to believe you!" she said, "but it's just… all those stories, they're killing me."
"Hey babe," he said, "come on, let's get those flowers in a vase and then we wit down and talk, okay?"
Gabriella nodded, "okay," she whipped away the tears and went to grab a vase and got the flowers in the vase, and then they sat down at the couch and talked.
"Baby," he sighed, "those stories, that's how my life is; every time they see me with someone, the stories will start – there will be so many rumors all the time, and they are hard to cope with…" he sighed again, "but they are not true!"
She looked up at him with her dark brown eyes, "I know," she sighed, "it's just so hard to handle for me."
"I know, darlin', I know," he sighed and caressed her cheek, "but I'm with you, and I'm happy with you, no matter what all those stupid magazines tell."
She nodded, "I know, I'm sorry," she said.
"You don't have to be sorry, baby," he said and pulled her into his arms, "I'm the one, who didn't warn you about this."
They sat talking for a while about everything and it all fell into place and Gabriella was happy with it again. After dinner they went out with some of his friends to a bar, just to get a couple of drinks.
End of flashback…
He sighed again, the paparazzi… it was them and their stories that had killed their relationship. They had really tried to overcome all those things, but it just hurt her too much. And it had hurt him to see her hurt. He missed her like crazy, and thinking back at all of those memories with her did not help it. The night at the bar, where they had been having drinks with some of his friends, they had been sitting in a sofa, and everything had been a little bit more wild than just a couple of drinks, so suddenly it felt like the sofa was started to sink. He chuckled to himself at the memory of them falling down from the sofa, because they had been sitting at the edge of the sofa and had tipped it over themselves.
Gabriella Montez, can we please talk? Can we please try again?
I know we tried, I know it ended, but I miss you. I need you!
No one understands me like you do. My life is like a sinking ship
- it feels like it is sinking, and no one can stop it except from you.
I know it is a lot to put on your shoulders, especially since we
actually have not known each other for more than a little bit more
than two months. But what I am trying to tell you is; I miss you,
and nothing is the same without you! Everything with you was
special – and I meant it all, every single little thing. Every smile,
every tear, every hug, every flower, every touch…
Been thinking about the bar we drank in.
Feeling like the sofa was sinking.
I was warm in the hold of your eyes.
So if my words break through the wall
To meet you at your door,
All I can say is "Girl, I mean them all."
He looked at the picture on the table… the picture of her. She was smiling so beautiful, with her long dark brown curls hanging lose around her face. The picture had been taking a few days after they met the first time. He smiled at it, it had all been so perfect until that day…
Flashback… two weeks earlier…
He had come to her work to pick her up, and everything had been just fine. They sat down at couch in her living room and she looked really closely at him and sighed.
"I can't do this," she said, as tears came to her eyes.
"What do you mean, you can't do this?" he looked at her surprised.
"Us," she sighed and tears streamed down her face.
"Gabriella," he took her hand, "what's wrong?"
She looked at him, "I can't take it, I can't take all of those rumors, all of those stories about you…" she cried, "I can't… I just can't!"
"But I thought we had talked about this, babe," he said and caressed her hand.
"You don't understand, do you?" she sighed. "You don't get how hard it is to be your girlfriend and having to cope with all of those stories all the time?"
"So what are you saying?" he asked nervously, knowing just what she was saying.
"I think…" she swallowed and took a deep breathe, "I think…" she looked at him with tears in her eyes, "I think we need to stop this… let's say we tried…"
"But, babe," he tried.
"No, please," she cried, "just…" she bit her lip, "it's over… I can't do it…"
"Gabriella…" he tried again.
"No just please…" she cried, "just let me stay in your arms one last time, and then it's over… we tried, it's been sweet, but it can't work like this… I can't take it."
He hugged her tightly for a long time, "I understand you," he admitted, "I wouldn't be able to take this either…" the tears ran down his cheeks.
Gabriella looked up at him, "I'm sorry."
"Don't say that," he said and kissed her forehead, "it's okay, I understand."
She bit her lip and closed her eyes, "I really wished this could work."
"So did I," he said pulling back slowly.
"You have to go now, before I regret this," she said as tears streamed down her face.
He nodded, "I really wish you'll regret this, you know that, right?"
She nodded, "I know," she took a deep breath, "but we have to stop now…"
"I'm sorry I hurt you," he whispered before kissing her softly one last time, "I love you, please never forget that!"
She nodded and bit her lip and opened the door for him to leave. He left looking at her with tears streaming down his face. She closed the door behind him; he knew for sure that she had crashed to the floor crying behind the door. He just knew. And it killed him. He went home to his apartment, and he stayed there not answering anyone for a week. He had texted Gabriella every day, but she did not answer.
End of flashback…
And here he was, trying to write a letter to her… the girl; he met accidently in a coffee shop… the girl that had changed his life in such enormous ways in such a short time… the girl that had taken his heart…
He stood up and looked around. He was alone; he was cold. He felt sick… he had been feeling like this the past two weeks. Since that day she had told him that they needed to stop it… that they had tried…
He sat down again and continued to write.
Dear darlin', I am sorry for this writing; I know it is not the
best, but I cannot help it, I am shaking like crazy. I am so
nervous that this letter will only hurt you even more, which
of course not is the purpose for it. I miss you. I hope you will
give me another chance – go with me, come along with me in
everything I do – let us prove those stupid paparazzi's that
they cannot make us split up.
Please, Gabriella Montez, let us try again.
He stood up, "dammit," he screamed at the paper. He got his car keys and ran to his car and got into it and drove off… stopping only three places. The coffee shop, the store across the street from the coffee shop and by the florist. Then he drove to a very well known place, where he pulled up and got out of the car with the stuff he had bought and rang the doorbell.
The door went up, there she stood… the girl with the long brown, curly hair, the dark brown eyes and the prettiest face he had ever seen.
"Before you say anything…" he said, and then he began to sing:
"Dear darlin', please excuse my writing.
I can't stop my hands from shaking
'Cause I'm cold and alone tonight.
I miss you and nothing hurts like no you.
And no one understands what we went through.
It was short. It was sweet. We tried.
Oh I can't cope. These arms are yours to hold.
And I miss you and nothing hurts like no you.
And no one understands what we went through.
It was short. It was sweet. We tried.
We tried."
She looked at him in disbelief.
"I'm sorry, I can't take this," he said, "I can't be away from you!"
The tears started to form in her eyes, "oh Troy!" she hugged him tightly.
"Can I come in?" he asked.
"Of course," she said and let him in.
"These are for you," he said and handed her the flowers – pink roses, her favorite. She took the flowers and smiled through her tears. "And this," he gave her the bag from the store across the street from the coffee shop. "And finally, two black coffees from the coffee shop, where we first met," he said.
Gabriella shook her head, "you're crazy."
"I'm crazy about you," he said and sat down the coffees at the table, "and I can't be away from you!"
"I can't be away from you either," she admitted.
"I miss you, and nothing hurts like no you," he whispered.
"I'm yours," she whispered back.
"And I'm yours," he smiled and kissed her softly.
"No one understands what we've been through, it's been so bittersweet, and we tried… we even tried to stay apart," she said.
"Yeah, we tried," he said, "but we failed badly, but we tried, dear darlin'," he said and kissed her once again.