I got the idea from reading and watching too much Bleach, and I thought this would be a leg up from what I normally do. I hope you enjoy!
"Facade:
Chapter One;
A Meeting of Sorts"
"YOU FUCKING RETARD!"
"RETARD? WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO?"
"YOU AND YOUR OVERGROWN PET NEARLY KILLED HALF OF SEIREITEI!"
"I AM NOT HIS PET, AND WE SO DIDN'T! THOSE GUYS WANTED A FIGHT AND THAT'S WHAT WE GAVE 'EM!"
I sat there listening to the dispute going on between the four hot heads, honestly frustrated but too overly exhausted of dealing with them; I didn't have the energy to tell either of them off. To be completely honest, I never even imagined myself having to sit in a meeting just to make sure each side of the turn table behaved.
While I was sitting in a chair at the meeting hall, I was watching Renji and Kenpachi shout their insults over to none of than Grimmjow and Nnoitora; the Sexta and Quinto of Aizen's old army. It had been only a few months since I killed the bastard, and we expected all the arrancar to retaliate. Instead, all the remaining Espada stepped forward as representatives of Las Noches; stating that they no longer wanted to fight and were more than willing to keep their troops under control if the shinigami were willing to compromise. Said six remaining also requested me as a mediator so that Soul Society didn't rob them blind and vice versa.
Yawning, I could see Ulquiorra's never ending stoic gaze down on me for what felt like eternity. I beat him too, and despite the slight harshness I got from him, he at least treated me with a bit of decency, especially considering I was meant to help them, and according to the girl-Hallibel, I think-he was the one who insisted me sitting here. And for that, I respect him in return.
After a lengthy staring contest with him, he finally spoke up. "Kurosaki." He called sternly, somehow able to grab the attention of the four bickering. "Shouldn't you be coming up with a solution to this by now?" He questioned, probably getting irritated with the yelling to a good degree, just as I was.
Rubbing my eyes, I stated: "I got here at five this morning to come to a meeting two hours later about prior events that needed to be sorted through and fixed. The problem with my job in this case is that they all started screaming left and right after I only asked what happened. I'm sitting here after only just starting the first objective twenty minutes later, and I still don't have any more of a clue about what happened then when I got here." I explained, simply.
Ulquiorra nodded in understanding, seeing as how it was hard to get anything from the four yelling idiots ahead of me. As a force of habit, I turned to Ukitake, who normally had a good grasp on what had happened. And, as usual, the man explained the situation. "Grimmjow and Nnoitora were both challenged to a fight by some of the members of the Eleventh Division," he started.
"Oh, boy..." Another fight-related situation...why was I not surprised?
"The fight, as you might have imagined, didn't take very long, but the end result caused massive destruction to several other divisions, and nearly caused the men to die." He finished simply, knowing how badly I hated hearing about these scenarios. Why it had to be the same thing with these two, I'd never know.
I let out a long sigh. "Alright then," I started, standing up in the process, "by the sounds of things, the four of you each have a different end to the story. So, when I call on you, you can explain to us what exactly happened. Got it?" I told them, receiving a round of "che's" and "whatever's."
Sighing again, I turned to Renji. "Let's hear it!" I told him, knowing he'd probably have the most accurate of them. I meant nothing against the others, but Nnoitora and Kenpachi both shared a simple mind, that actions spoke louder for. Grimmjow could fill details better than the two, but this required him to actually calm down for five minutes and explain, which if his viewpoint wasn't ridiculed by the captains, then it was trampled on by the other Espada (Ulquiorra, mainly).
"I was in the Eleventh to have a training session with Ikkaku." He simply started. "Just five minutes, not even that, after getting there, I had to duck and cover from a golden cero being blasted towards me." Aw, Kami-sama, couldn't Nnoitora live without nearly killing bystanders for just a day? "After what felt like forever, I looked around and saw several people on the ground injured, and several buildings demolished; the Eleventh having the worst of it after the repairs had only just finished last week." He stated.
I nodded, understanding his perspective of the situation. "Did you happen to see what happened inside the Eleventh?" I was felt forced to ask by the former Espada.
He sighed. "I was able to climb through the rubble and get to the training grounds. By the time I did, I saw Captain Zaraki cursing at these two," he stated, pointing at the most violent of the Espada, "about all the shit he'd have to put up with, and everything else that has happened whenever they choose to fight in the Eleventh." He finished.
"Okay," I said, "Grimmjow, you're up!" I told the blunette.
Albeit surprised I said it, he let out an annoyed sigh before answering. "You remember the ordeal that was set up in the last meeting?" He questioned. I nodded, having remembered telling them that if they wanted to fight, they'd either have to be in an emergency situation, challenge someone two days in advanced, or be challenged by the opponents. "Those recruits from the Eleventh asked for a fight, saying that they were stronger than us." He started out.
"Yeah, that figures..." I thought, placing a hand on my head and trying to repress an irritated groan.
"Naturally, we told 'em off first hand, then they challenge us to a fight, and so we fought." Basic explanation meaning he was about to complain about them. "The damn bastards were better at running their mouths than they were at fighting, and what they had been saying damn well pissed us off, so we stopped holding back and beat the hell out of them to shut 'em up." He explained.
"And Zaraki came by cursing at you afterwords, didn't he?" I questioned him.
He nodded. "Yeah, and that lieutenant," he stated, making a gesture towards Renji, "soon joined him about the damage we did outside; it's not like we meant to hit anybody else, we just got pissed off by some weak recruits who didn't know when to shut up." At this, Ichigo noticed, Zaraki shrugged, having been dealing with that shit for over a century.
Looking at him, Zaraki shrugged. "What he said." Nnoitora just gave me nod, looking as if he didn't want to tell the whole story a second time.
Taking this in, I let out a sigh before beginning to rub the back of my neck, already feeling sore from hearing it. "Well, I know you guys took in what I said, and I'm glad you did, so locking you up is unnecessary, considering that you followed the boundaries by three claims." At this, they smirked. "But," I started, getting rid of their looks, "despite all that, you still toppled over a lot of buildings and hurt a lot of people, so this can't go without some form of punishment."
At this, I noticed everyone except for the two Espada agreed. "Since you were provoked," I told them, "I'm going to be giving you two weeks community service." At this, they glared at me. "You get to choose between either helping repair the damages, or helping treat the patients in the fourth division. Both of which enlist that you help fix the mess you created." I finished in a matter-of-fact tone.
The twosome looked at each other before looking at me. "Like Grimmy said," Nnoitora started, "it's not like we meant to hit anybody else. Back in Las Noches, we've been used to firing at our opponents, and unless it nearly killed one of our superiors, no one really stood up to complain." He explained, briefly.
All of the other Espada's eyes widened, probably out of the fact Nnoitora brought up another reasonable argument as to why they did the damage. "He is telling the truth." Szayel admitted. "The only limit there's ever been for arrancar fighting was for the top four Espada, and that's just to make sure they don't release their zanpakutos within the dome of the city." He explained.
I sighed once again. "Point taken," I told Nnoitora, "I may consider shortening the service to a single week on the condition you and Grimmjow only challenge seated officers from seat eight to captain's rank, agree that these fights will either be well contained in the courtyards, or take place out in the open where you can't hurt anyone else, and that you're being supervised by one of your fellow Espada whilst doing so." I told them.
As they glanced at each other; probably wondering if it were worth the sacrifice; I had to repress a smirk. Ulquiorra brought it forward the last time they got in trouble, and at that point, they were objecting to it. Now, however, this was a more liable chance to get off with less of a load, because if they failed to cooperate, I could make their punishment worse.
They nodded, albeit reluctantly, and that made me glance back to the others. "They have to give word of their fights to you, and one of you has to supervise. If not, then I will be expecting you take responsibility over the action not being conducted." I stated, receiving nods-including one that came from an almost smirking Ulquiorra. The extremely small glint of pride was passed my way, as he was pleased with the results.
Sighing in relief that the hard part was out of the way, I took in a breath and asked: "Any other complaints I should know about before we press onto other matters?" I asked the group.
"I have one." I turned back seeing Kurotsuchi step forward. Whatever happened was probably lab related, and since he didn't bring up Grimmjow or Nnoitora while I was dealing with them, it was safe to assume that he was probably going to point a finger at Szayel because of some debate they had that ended in Szayel being right. "That pink-haired impubescent corrupted my latest experiment and destroyed half of my laboratory in the process." He accused, pointing a finger at him.
Called it! "Impubescent? I took one look at the chemical compound that you were testing with the plutonium, and I specifically told you that it was going to end up a disaster, but you didn't listen to me! After I tried to defend my statement with scientific fact, you had Nemu-chan take me out before anything happened. Three minutes after being kicked out was when the explosion happened, and the cameras there will be able to prove it!" He stated, crossing his arms.
I sighed. "Sui-Feng, did the second division go through the videos yet?" I asked her. She nodded. "Is Szayel telling the truth?" Came my next question, knowing how much of a hard working she was.
"There was absolutely nothing in the tapes that could suggest he wasn't." She stated flatly.
Nodding, I turned to Kurotsuchi. "There are a lot of limitations Szayel was put under, most involving experimentation. You should know because you sat with me and the old man when we made them." I stated, giving him a serious look. "Accusing Szayel of doing that would risk them going against the treaty they want, and Szayel's the smartest one of 'em; I find it highly unlikely that he'd be as so stupid as to overstep his limitations under close watch." I stated simply, allowing Szayel his victory moment. "Anyone else, or are we done?"
Omadae stepped forward. This should be good. "Yeah, that short freak attacked me." He stated, pointing towards Ulquiorra. Finding myself in shock, I looked up at the lieutenant of the second, wondering what the hell he meant. "I was walking out of the division ready to start rounds with two of our seated officers. That freak was in the courtyard waiting and just plain hit me straight to the barracks." He explained, briefly.
In disbelief, I gave Ulquiorra a look which told him to tell his end. "To correct Lieutenant Omadae, I was heading for the second division for my weekly spar I had with his captain and to educate some of the new recruits." Turning to Sui-Feng, I saw her nod, confirming Ulquiorra's statement. "I was walking up to the division just as the lieutenant was coming out with two others, and taking notice to me, he began laughing, calling me a weakling for ever versing her." He explained.
Now, this was coming together. "Did you strike Omadae when he said that?" I asked him.
He shook his head. "Trash like him isn't worth my time, and that's precisely what I told him." I could see the vein pop in Omadae's head at the statement. "I then advised him to get back to work before such time his superior showed up to handle him herself, like she always did whenever I came over."
Noticing the gawking lieutenant and his smirking captain, I turned back to him and asked: "How did the lieutenant of the second respond to this advise?" I questioned.
"Not well. He told me to, in his own words: 'shut the hell up,' and said that I wasn't 'high enough' to insult him as such." He replied.
"And how did you react to that?" I asked.
Sighing, he replied: "I didn't. I decided to ignore him and continue making my way so I wouldn't be late. What he did delayed me." He simply explained.
My eyebrow arched. "Did he drop the matter like you did?" I asked, curiously.
He shook his head. "No, he drew his sword, charged at me whilst calling me a bastard, then tried to cut me down. Out of a simple act of self defense and the pure intention to end the matter, I flicked him backwards before making the rest of my way in." He finished, the monotone in his voice outlined lightly with annoyance.
"That's bullshit!" Omadae yelled at him, defensively.
Ulquiorra looked up at him. "That's the truth. A man of your stature acting out like a lunatic because you couldn't handle being ignored by someone in a higher place than you, not to mention far more stronger than you will ever be." He stated simply, turning back to me to await a solution.
Sui-Feng looked at me expectantly. "Well?" She questioned me, waiting for my decision.
Omadae was about to start off in telling me that Ulquiorra was lying still, but I simply walked up to him and said: "Apologize."
He stared at me, baffled. "What the hell do you mean? !"
I smirked. "Precisely that. You're going to apologize to Ulquiorra." I simply stated, noticing the smirking Espada.
Omadae stuttered. "B...but he-"
"Did nothing wrong." I simply stated, getting confused glances. "There are few things I know for certain about Ulquiorra, but what I do know is that: he follows the rules, and how he never attacks anybody unless he's provoked in some way. Hearing Ulquiorra attack you blindly without reason didn't fit, which made me doubt your statement immediately. Combine that with the fact you couldn't lay out anymore detail other than what you placed together gave me even more reason to believe that your claim was BS." I told him, crossing my arms and nodding off towards the Cuatro.
Being glared at by his captain, he went up to Ulquiorra and begrudgingly said sorry, how wouldn't do it again, etc. Having that out of the way, and seeing no other people stepping forward, I pressed on. "Okay, moving on," I said, sitting back down in the seat provided, "have we made progress on the defense articles of the treaty?" I asked, motioning towards Harribel, whom of which had been discussing it with the old man.
"Some." She stated. "The commander and I are in disagreement on the contradictions of war alliances. We also can't see eye-to-eye about development standards." She explained to me.
Well, that was more progress than before. "That's right, you want to rebuild Las Noches back to its former glory, and he wants you to belittle its size and security systems." I stated, rubbing my eye. Politics was exhausting, but it was working. "I can level with you that restoring Las Noches to its former standards isn't just for a military aspect, but for its people to live as well." I told her. "As long as there is a trusted shinigami inspector able to show up once every month to ensure that, then I have no problem with your development plans." I stated.
Despite the fact her face was covered, I could feel her smile. "As for war alliances," I started out again, grabbing their attention, "I say one remains neutral to the other unless it somehow threatens their own, or if it's too troubling to ignore." I informed them. "The details, I believe you can manage on your own." I told them, receiving two nods.
The meeting lasted until pushing noon. At that point, I decided it'd be best to grab some lunch then get some sleep before heading back home to do schoolwork. Ulquiorra, pleased with the progress made today, invited me over to the Espada's barracks. I accepted.
Walking alongside him towards the temporary lodging, I couldn't help but feel weird walking alongside someone I used to call my enemy. But then again not. I couldn't place a finger on why, but for some reason, ever since I started with this mediation job, the Espada had begun to feel like acquaintances to me. Almost as if I'd been working with them for years on end. And, for what it seemed, they felt the same way.
Making it to the house, Ulquiorra opened the door for me as I walked in. We took off our shoes at the door before walking in the rest of the way. I sat down in the bland dining room as Ulquiorra walked over to the kitchen. "Do you have a preference?" He asked in that same monotone, turning his head in my direction. The Cuatro never really spoke his thanks, but doing things like inviting me over for lunch was his own way of showing it.
Shrugging, I said: "Whatever the chef suggests is fine with me," whilst giving him a small smile. Nodding, he left the room. As I waited, I went back to remembering how Ulquiorra became the cook of the household; it was so funny that I had to make sure I didn't start laughing; he was next door, so he'd hear me in an instant.
It was after the first meeting and all of them, to say the least, were exhausted. Moreover, they were starving because the meeting had literally lasted the whole day. I had stuck with them that night and although I offered to whip up a meal, even Nnoitora and Grimmjow said I had done enough by sticking out my neck for 'em throughout the whole day.
Within the next few minutes, each one had tried to cook a meal so as to say thanks. Ulquiorra had made us both some tea and even put the kettle in front of us. "This could take awhile." I remember him informing me in that same tone of voice. And to his word, it did, just not how I expected it.
Because Starrk was the highest in ranks, he went first. He fell asleep at the stove, leaving Lilynette to have to wake him up at the sight of fire rising, and Harribel to put it out. Said girl was next; it wasn't that she couldn't cook, it was just that she didn't cook well. Long story short, Ulquiorra ended up giving me the Heimlich maneuver not too long after tasting her food.
Nnoitora was next. As one would expect, he was used to being served, not doing the serving. He did make food, but by looks and technique, it was completely inedible...not to mention insanely disturbing. Grimmjow went up, and as I expected, he knew a bit more than the others did when it came to the matter. Sadly, his spice range was all over the place, mixing in foods that were too bland and foods that were way too spicy.
Szayel was about to go, but the other five, in one fowl swoop immediately said: "No!" I would have myself, only I was in their place, and I was trying to be nice. They argued with Szayel that despite the fact he probably could cook better than the others, they didn't want anything else to be mixed into his food, as he was known for back in Las Noches.
They fought back and forth, and whilst they did, Ulquiorra had stood, went into the kitchen and came back about an hour later; the kitchen clean and hot food ready. Being the most bland Espada, I found his skill in cooking unbelievable. But then again not, considering the fact he was also the most secretive of all six of them.
Heading back into reality, Ulquiorra had walked back in with two bowls of hot soup. He then returned to the kitchen a couple times to retrieve tea, dumplings and soy sauce. Tasting the soup, as I expected, packed massive flavor, and had a nice creamy texture. "Still as good as I remember." I stated. He only nodded.
We ate in silence for the most part; me bringing up some other subjects like how his training sessions with Sui-Feng went, to which he would give me the simplest of answers before returning to his food. When we finished, I went into the kitchen with him and washed the dishes whilst he put them away. I didn't know a single inch of their kitchen, so it was easier this way.
Now finished and feeling more exhausted, Ulquiorra directed me to their couch, to which he stated I needed the rest. Nodding in approval, I lied down on the cushions, taking in the clean scent of the house before dozing off to sleep; feeling absolutely content that there was peace returning into my life.
If only I knew how much of a big mouth I had...
Man that was long...REVIEW!