Author's Notes: This story was semi-inspired by one of Bearit's wonderful stories in which Geo and Lantis actually sit down to speak of events passed. However, I have always wondered to myself exactly what the two would say to each other after what had happened in the anime. So what would they have to say to each other, what problems will still need to be resolved? Set several years after the anime endings.

Warnings: Angst, mention of death, swearing.

Dedication: To Bearit, for her wonderful and touching stories. (Explanation as to why in the notes.)

Spoilers: Entire series.

Obligatory Disclaimer: I own no part of Magic Knight Rayearth or any of its characters, particularly Geo and Lantis. They all belong to CLAMP and associates.

City Rhythm


There was a certain rhythm to the nightlife of the city. A kind of hurried, rapid-paced beat that echoed in the click of high heels against the sidewalk cement and the revving of car engines, reflecting in glass windows of towering skyscraping that seemed to continue stretch endlessly into a dark oblivion.
This was the same tempo that Lantis of Cephiro danced to as he strolled through the streets of Autozam's capital city one cold, lonely night in the dead of winter.
The sidewalks were crowed with pedestrian and vehicle alike as people scurried to and forth from one destination to another, taking no heed of their surroundings as they considered only the future. It was sad, Lantis thought, that so few of Autozam's residents bothered to stop for a moment and breathe in the relatively clean air of the city around them. Six years ago, such an act would have been nearly impossible without the enormous glass-like structures surrounding each large area of inhabitance protecting those within from the terrible pollution that plagued the planet.
Yet none paused long enough to allow even a few seconds to pass them by, none bothered to step outside the rhythm of the planet to march to the beat of his own drum. It was as if they were afraid that in doing so they would lose their place among the others. Life would continue on, but they would be forever trapped in the few seconds they let time stop.
Not that Lantis could blame them; he had lived his entire life a figure frozen in lost time.
The wind blew suddenly, harshly. Tightening his scarf, Lantis began searching for a small shop or small store he could escape to soon and find warmth.
Though Autozam had managed to avoid disaster and reduce the overwhelming amounts of pollutants in their air with the aid of Cephiro and other races, it had left the civilization to deal with a constantly fluctuating magnetic field that caused brutal storms and a sharp contrast between the cold and warm seasons of the year. While the Autozam race had acclimated to this change over the past ten years, most other races had not, and Lantis, a native of a rather warm planet, was one of them.
Shivering, Lantis wrapped his arms around himself, rubbing his arms through the large coat. Stopping long enough to speak with one man for directions, he then moved on, turning at the corner towards a small shop on the corner. It was a tiny little thing really, but it was a warm, friendly little place that would receive any man with open arms and a warm cup of whatever was brewing.
By the time he reached his destination, large, fluffy, white crystals had begun raining down upon the city, cloaking the town in a cold, white blanket. Opening his hand, Lantis caught one of the snowflakes, smiling faintly as he studied the intricate patterns. Amazing where beauty could be found if one bothered his eyes.
A soft ring could be heard as he entered the shop, signaling his arrival. The shopkeeper looked up once, giving him a quick nod in regards--which Lantis returned--before pointing a figure to an empty table near the back. Thanking the manager, he stiffly walked over to the table, rubbing his hands briskly.
The table was small and uniform with the style that was popular in the small shops that were tucked here and there in the eves of the main city. Small blue dots glared up at Lantis from a backdrop of pale yellow. Idly, he traced a pattern with his figure, connecting the dots with an indivisible line. "Finishing the puzzle," he said softly aloud.
"Excuse me, what was that sir?"
Startled, Lantis whirled around to face the faceless voice behind him. His eyes were greeted by the round, pleasant face of a older woman smiling down at him, notepad in her right hand, electronic pen in the other. She was dressed in traditional Autozam fashion, her skirt puffed out slightly at the edges and trimmed with blue and yellow. To the right side of her forehead, the familiar sight of an Autozam energy crystal glowed a very faint blue as she gazed at him with gold eyes.
"Yes?" he responded lightly.
"Nothing," said the woman with another smile, "I'm just here to take your order."
"Oh, well, I'll just take, um..." Lantis glanced at the menu desperately, trying to find an item that he recognized. One would think that after the trade agreement between Cephiro and Autozam that more cultural integration would have occurred.
But it hadn't. So now poor, woeful Lantis was stuck with a menu that he was unable to read and short of eloquent thought. Luckily, the gods took mercy on him, and the woman spoke up in a reassuring tone, "From the looks of it, you don't come from anywhere 'round here, so I'll just bring you something popular, all righty then?"
Giving the woman a grateful nod, he sighed softly as she left, beginning to trace his fingers along the table top once more. Eyes focused on nothing in particular, Lantis' mind began to wander.
Gold eyes...the woman who had just served him had them. How many years had it been since he had seen gold eyes? Not enough, he thought sadly, At least not long enough to forget.
Above his head, the sound of falling snow grew louder as the storm slowly transformed itself into a hail. Now the rhythm of the city picked up as people hurried towards shelter. Lantis smiled inwardly with satisfaction at this. Autozam's inhabitants may have forgotten the sacrifice, but the weather would forever remind them of what was, would always assure them of the reality of the now. Because Autozam wasn't like Cephiro. They knew when to keep moving forward whereas his people remained frozen in time.
Or maybe it's just you, he scolded himself, shaking loose of self-pitying thoughts. The time for what could have been was past.
Lantis had just begun reading an article when his waitress reappeared, hot drink balancing on a tray. He thanked her kindly as she handed it to him before returning to his reading. Not that it was much to his interest; just a few articles on the newest trading routes Autozam had taken up and the impact it would have on the economy and government.
Politics, he thought with distaste, tossing the paper to the side. Nothing good had ever come out of political decisions, whether the choices had been made by princesses, priests, or president's sons...
Lantis shut his eyes, forcing images of old friends and family long past from his mind. Nothing good came out of digging up the past either. Then why did you come here after so long, his inner voice inquired tauntingly, Just to take a stroll around the park?
Having no answer, Lantis simply sighed and grabbed the handle of his cup, lifting it to his lips to sip. Just as the warm liquid was about to pass his lips, the waitress once again interrupted him, hurrying over and calling out, "Sir!"
Abruptly lowering his hand turning to face her, he asked somewhat irritated, "Yes?"
Breathlessly, she apologized before answering, "I'm sorry, sir, but I'm afraid I gave you the wrong order. You're drinking a koufii meant for that men over there." Lifting one well-manicured finger, she pointed to a dimly lit corner of the diner where a man with dark hair was surrounded by folders and papers of various colors, a more than slightly annoyed look evident upon his features. Dark eyes peaked out from under thick eyebrows above which a tan eyebrow knitted further in irritation by each passing moment.
Lantis blinked. He looked so familiar...Wracking his mind for recollection, he touched upon each and every face stored deep in his memory. He had seen this man before; now he he just had to place him. Names ran through his mind like a roaring river: Father, Mother, Zagato, Emeraude, Hikaru, Clef, Eagle...Eagle! Lantis' eyes widened in recognition.
Geo! This was Geo Metro, Eagle's second in command and old friend.
At the thought of the man, Lantis' eyes closed to small slits. Geo and he had never grown very well acquainted; in fact, there had always been an air of tension between the two of them, as if the one couldn't bear to think that the other would take Eagle away...
Presently, Lantis shook his mind of doubts. Any bitter feelings he harbored were in the past alongside Eagle's soul; the time for reminiscing and friendship was now. It was not every day that one came upon a memory from his past so long after it had occurred; perhaps the Fates had concurred that this meeting of souls should arrive on the eve of the very anniversary of that horrible battle so many years ago...
Stiffening, Lantis came to a decision. If destiny had chosen him to meet with Geo on this day, then he would not shirk his duty; perhaps it was time to forgive and forget.
"...so upon realizing my mistake, I hurried over here to see whether or not to see if you had drank from your cup so maybe you two could, well, switch?" The young woman gave him a nervous smile, snapping Lantis out of his reverie and returning him to reality.
He studied her for a moment. "You smile a lot, you know."
The visage faded. "It's my job," she said flatly.
Laughing, he grasped her hand and patted it gently. "Don't worry, ma'am, I'll take it over myself. He's a former acquaintance of mine. Don't worry about."
"Oh, you would do that?" She looked up at him with hopeful eyes. Seeing him nod in reply, she gave a relieved sigh and rushed off to take another order as more customers entered the shop.
Going silent as the woman left, Lantis straightened to his full height and, sweeping the steaming cup off the table, strolled over to where Geo was sitting.
At first, he wasn't quite sure how to approach the other man, but soon, he gathered up his courage and just jumped right in. "Hello there."
Not bothering to look up--Lantis assumed he had turned back to his work assuming that the waitress was getting him another order--Geo answered shortly, "What do you want?"
Lantis sighed. Well if the man wasn't going to even look at him they were going to have quite a problem with a conversation. This time, he sat the cup down loudly and pushed it towards the other man before speaking. "I think this is yours."
This time he received a response.
"Yes, I asked the waitress for another, now why the hell are-" Geo paused mid-sentence as he caught a glimpse of Lantis. While time had taken its toll on the former sub-commander, Lantis had not aged one bit in the time he had left Cephiro. "You," he said softly.
"Yes," Lantis said just as softly, "Me."
A softening of features as if recalling a fond memory but then a painful flash across the eyes and, "So, the little wizard returns to haunt me. Tell me, what magic trick did you use this time? Pull yourself out a hat and end up right on my doorstep?"
Insulted, Lantis clenched a fist but restrained himself. After all, it had been several years since they last had seen one another and during that time...well, everyone dealt with pain and anger differently. He didn't bother hiding his annoyance when he responded, though. "As I last recalled, this was a public diner." He sighed, then said more quietly, "Don't you think it's time we ended this game?"
Geo opened his mouth to retort but then closed it, averting his eyes. Why of all the people from his past did he have to show up resurrecting memories right and left?
"May I sit down?" He paused, then said softly, "You know, Geo, the years haven't been any kinder to me than they have you."
Geo gave Lantis another sharp glance but again didn't respond. Damn it all... "Go ahead," he said gruffly, making a careless motion towards the seat across from him, "I don't care."
"Yes you do," Lantis said simply, smirking slightly at Geo's glare, "But thank you."
Blinking, Geo stared at him. The last response had been rather earnest, even if his tone was sarcastic earlier. He eyed the other man warily. What did Lantis want from him?
As if reading his mind, Lantis spoke, "I didn't come here to insult you, if that's what you fear. I just came here to talk. It has been...a long time, you know."
"Yes, I suppose ten years is a long time to forget..." Geo trailed off on his train of thought, eyes going somewhere beyond Lantis again.
An uncomfortable silence fell between the two, and Lantis squirmed slightly trying to decide what to say next. One day was a long time, much less ten years. At a loss, he finally gave in to the oldest line in the book. "So...what have you been up to lately?"
Motioning to the papers around him, Geo answered softly, "Reports," before turning back to his scribblings.
Finally, Lantis grew exasperated. "Damnit, Geo, I'm just trying to hold a civil conversation with you. It's been ten years already!"
The scolded man looked up in surprise, startled by his outburst. He lifted one dark eyebrow in amusement before his lips turned up in a smug look. "Aww...did I hurt your feelings, Lantis?"
Lantis was not so amused. "You're mocking me."
"Damn straight I am! You know, I forget just how amusing you are sometimes, Lantis." Geo laughed aloud, then pushed his papers aside. "Alright. I'll give that to you. It's been a long time." He looked around casually before meeting Lantis' lavender eyes. "Paperwork. Trade schedules for the newly established routes."
"Eh?"
"You asked me what I was doing." He nodded in the direction of the messily stacked papers. "I'm filing a report on the new trade partners established in the Kaiteersei system, as well as mapping various traveling routes that the ships will take, both main and emergency, and logging the coordinates to be followed before all of this is put into the main computer."
"Sounds big," Lantis mused, "But it's not what I expected you to be doing right now. Last time I remember, you were a second in the command."
Geo's eyes narrowed at the reference. "I got out of that type of work years ago." He shifted uncomfortably. "Brings back too many bad memories. Besides, this pays better," he said with a shrug. Nervously fingering the edge of one of his reports, "So where have you been doing all this time?"
It was Lantis, this time, who shifted his eyes. "I've been...traveling."
Lifting his glass and taking a sip of his brew, "Traveling, eh? To where, might I ask? I thought magicians liked to stay on their feet."
Mimicking Geo's actions, Lantis lifted his own mug. "Various planets. Chizeta, Monaso...Earth." The last part came out as a soft whisper, and Lantis took a swig of his drink to avoid the emotions he knew were swelling up in him. "Just basically anywhere-" He paused suddenly, making a face. Lantis glanced at the contents of his cup then at Geo, his cup, then Geo. He said slowly, "Geo...what exactly is this stuff."
Brown eyes sparkled mischievously. "Just one of Autozam's homemade deluxes! Dontcha just love it Lantis?"
Not honoring the other man with an answer, Lantis carefully set the cup down and pushed it far away from where he was sitting, careful not to spill it anywhere. ("Popular my ass," he grumbled.)
To his credit, he did not touch it for the rest of the time he was in there.
Once the subject of tasteless beverages was solved (and Geo stopped laughing), Lantis switched modes, turning the conversation to Geo once more. "How's Autozam been in the past few years? I haven't been here in forever." Of course, you haven't been much anywhere that made you remember things in a long time, he reminded himself.
Hesitating, the dark-haired man averted his eyes before nodding to the window where the snowstorm raged on. "Erratic," he said simply, then sighed and said very, very softly, "They forget too easily what was sacrificed."
Lantis followed his gaze sadly. "Everyone forgets. That's just human nature."
"Sometimes I wish I had that ability," the other man remarked.
"I know what you mean." His gaze hardened. I know too well.
"Lantis...have you ever felt as if...as if you've been left behind, as if everything's moving so fast that you can't-" Geo halted. "Never mind. So," he ventured, "how are things on Cephiro?"
Lantis' grip tightened on the edge of the tabletop. "I wouldn't know," he responded, "I haven't been there in more than five years." He paused for a moment, then spoke quickly, "I was too busy to visit." Liar...
"Oh...Well then, how have you been living these past few years, other than traveling, I mean." Flashing him a trademark smile, Geo waited for his reply.
"I've been...alone. And I discovered there isn't much to see anywhere in the universe." He smiled sardonically. "Anywhere you go, no matter what race they are, people are always the same. They brush you off as some unimportant memory. It doesn't matter how much you sacrificed, how much you loved them..." Lantis broke off suddenly, choking. He gripped the tabletop tightly, hands shaking. Why did it still hurt so much even now?
Through all of this, Lantis hadn't noticed that Geo had been studying him intently. Geo wasn't the most perceptive man, but he did have an eye for observation. If it hadn't been for that ability, he would never have found out about Eagle's illness. Before it was too late. Before he had a chance to say goodbye. He shut his eyes, and a voice flashed through his mind. Goodbye Geo...
He brushed it off. Reaching over, Geo gently placed a hand near Lantis' hesitantly. "Lantis...what really happened on Cephiro that made you leave?"
"Nothing, Geo. I was just thinking...No, it's nothing now that I think about it."
"I hardly call your outburst nothing..."
"Just forget about it. I let my mouth get ahead of my thoughts."
"Lantis, if something's wrong you shouldn't--"
"Damnit Geo, will you just drop it?" Breathing heavily, Lantis gazed at the other man with pained eyes, unshed tears glistening gently.
Geo pulled his hand away. "I'm sorry. So...how are your girls, Lantis?"
"Girls?" Lantis looked at Geo quizzically.
"Your girls. Cephiro's girls. The knights. You know, Umi, Fuu, Hikaru, and what about that fairy girl Primera?" He made a flapping motion with his hand.
"Last time I visited several years ago, Fuu and Ferio had married once the former turned eighteen, and they have two children now. Everyone's still waiting for Ascot to get over his shyness and ask Umi out on even her first date, though I have to commend her for waiting for him that long. (At that, Geo exclaimed, "He hasn't yet?!" To this, Lantis shook his head.) She's become what they call on her world a very successful business consultant, which Fuu states is very fitting because she's, erm, aggressive. Primera and I separated once I began my intergalactic travels. She's currently keeping Presea's sister company, and..."
"And Hikaru?" Geo asked softly.
Another flash of hurt reflecting in lavender eyes, a deep breath, and then Lantis spoke. "Hikaru is married and happily living in her home world with a nice, sweet man by the name of Ryu Shinji."
A tidal wave of silence crashed down on both men, mercilessly swallowing both men in its suffocating, merciless waters. Eyes turned to the window facing the other side of the world where the heavens dumped buckets of white wash snow upon the Autozam's capital city. Like a frozen blanket shawling out from the hills and beyond, it covered everything, turning the city into a blank canvas awaiting an artist's touch.
"Yes."
Returning to reality, Geo eyed Lantis. "What?"
"You asked me earlier if I ever felt like I was trapped in time, as if I couldn't move forward. The answer is yes. I know exactly what you mean." He paused. "You do...know what today is, right...Or should I say tomorrow?"
Pulling back, Geo reclined in his chair, pupils still glued to the world beyond the closed window. He clenched one hand near his side, the other arm resting on the seat's back, his head leaning into the wall.
It was a long time before Geo answered.
"Of course," he finally answered, whispering hoarsely, "How could I forget." Geo moved, shifting position, turning his body so that he was parallel to Lantis. Dark eyes met lavender once again. "Ten years...he's been gone ten years. Yet it still feels as if it were only yesterday." Geo fingered the edge of his cup. "He and I used to come down here sometimes, you know. This little diner's survived for years, and when we were younger, we'd come here to get away from everything. From the stress, from people. That's why I still come here now." He shrugged helplessly. " You know what I mean."
"Of course I do." I've been running away from people for years. Lantis traced his fingers over the pattern of that table. The design was different where he was sitting now, the tabletop covered with abstract lines and shapes rather than dots. But the pale yellow color was still prevalent, hidden beneath the complex layers.
Was that was life was about, what Fate was? Never forgetting the past, always having it there with you, but allowing the pattern to change, to alter and recreate itself when Destiny called you? Was finding a release as simple as walking the distance between one tabletop pattern and the next?
Perhaps it was.
Taking a deep breath, Lantis found Geo's eyes, straining for the courage to overcome the mountain of emotion to come. "Geo...how did you feel when Eagle...died?"
It was said. Finally one of them had brought to light the name they had been avoiding for ten years.
Tears filled the other man's eyes, threatening to spill over. Trembling hands grasped the koufii cup tightly, the liquid inside quivering as the reverberations traveled through the ceramic exterior. Mirroring Lantis' actions, Geo took one deep breath. And then he took another. Then he took his last.

Lavender eyes studied hazel sadly.

"I died," he answered simply.
Lantis nodded, recalling even now the sharp agony of his own loss, the memory still as fresh and real as when the event actually occurred. "So did I," he said softly.
"We all did," Geo continued, "But you had to know Eagle well to understand how great a loss it was." He nodded at the window. "They've forgotten, and I imagine the case is the same on Cephiro. Sure, we still hold a small memorial day for his sacrifice once a year, but that's about it." Geo paused, then angrily slammed his fist down on table. "Goddamnit! Kids don't even know his name anymore. Ten years ago he was the talk of the planet, the incredible new discovery of the century. He had skill that impressed everyone, and we all looked to him as the one who would save our planet." Geo relaxed his fist for a moment, quieting. "Even today, his record of battle victories has yet to be exceeded. There was only one, after all, who could ever defeat him."
"Me," Lantis said softly, pointing to himself.
"Yes, you. The renegade alien who came to our world breaking records right and left, defeating Autozam's most powerful pilot and basically shooting everyone's perceptions of reality to hell." A pause. Then, "Eagle would never have found out about the Pillar if you'd never come."
Lantis shot Geo a poisonous glare. "Are you actually trying to blame me for what happened?"
Geo laughed bitterly. "Perhaps," he said, voice heavy with alacrity, "But then, if I thought that way, then I'm just as guilty as you are. I could have stopped Eagle if I had really wanted to. It was I who allowed him to leave the NSX in my command during the battle with Debonair, and even before that, I did nothing to stop his ambitions to become the Pillar." Bringing his cup to his mouth once again, Geo took a long, refreshing drink. "We're all guilty in our own way."
"I guess we are," Lantis answered hoarsely, suddenly recalling two pairs of eyes in his mind. Eagle's as he had said goodbye and Hikaru's as she showed him the ring on her finger. Both times they had said the same maddeningly simple phrase. I'm sorry Lantis... Whose fault had it been, really? The one who had moved on or the one who had waited, allowing himself to slowly waste away? I'm sorry, too, he now thought, sliding his hands over the tabletop.
By now, Geo had returned to the sanctity of his own thoughts, gaze settled on the abstract painting on the wall behind Lantis. The illustration could have been a metaphor for his life, he considered, relating to the lone silhouetted figure in the middle of a maze of diagonal, horizontal, and vertical lines. Ironic, wasn't that his destiny? A solitary man lost between the paths and fates of others, left behind by the very people he had cherished the most to be forever floating between one life and next. Where did the journey end? When would he find reason again? Would he ever be alive as he had been before? These were questions to which he had no answers.
But perhaps there was one who did.
"Lantis?"
"Yes?"
"How did you go on after losing her?"
Lantis paused for a moment, then he suddenly pulled something from his pocket. Geo gazed on in faint shock as the magician produced a small gold necklace, a ruby encrusted in the middle. "This," he said, pointing to the object, "I gave this to her as a token of my love. It was, in gesture, my proposal. After she refused my hand in marriage, showing me the ring already tightly clasped to her finger, I almost threw it away, not wanting the memories that would go with it.
"But I kept it. Who knows what for. Somehow, I couldn't bear to let the past go, couldn't bear to let her go. I didn't want to believe that everything I had worked for had been ripped away from me by some man whose face I didn't know, whose voice had never echoed in my ears, yet had somehow stolen the heart that I desired more than anything else."

Lantis paused now, intertwining his fingers in the chain. "To answer your question, I haven't moved on, Geo. I'm just as dead as you are. An empty man with an empty past with no true home to which I can return." He paused reflectively again. "She destroyed that."
"Oh gods..." Geo's hands shook, his voice hoarse. "Is there ever an end to it all? It's been ten years, Lantis, ten godammned, fucking years. Ten years of utter hell, of despair and desolation. Gods I...I..." He choked back a sob, and his drink spilled over the top, hands shaking too violently hold it any longer. "I loved him so much! So very much..."
"So did I. I loved them both so very much too." Lantis didn't bother to fight the tears now, and even if he wanted to, he wouldn't have had the ability. The face of the Autozam in front of him, his words, his memories and story...they all brought back so much.
Their grief was so tangible that it permeated the air of the restaurant, gloom settling upon the hearts of all at the bar. An old man in sitting at the bar shivered and pulled the flaps of his trench coat closer; the young waitress from before shook her head once before the smile fled from her features; and in the corner of the room, two men released ten years of misery and despair in the form of a salty lamentation.
It was a long time before either could speak, but when they were able, Lantis reached over a hand and carefully enclosed Geo's within it. "Geo," he said softly, "Do you believe in life after death?"
"I don't believe in it," Geo answered just as softly, "I just have the misfortune of knowing it."
"So you do?"
"No," the Autozam answered shortly, "I do not. Knowing and believing are two different things. A man's body will always live longer than his soul." Geo paused. "And I'll never be able to stop loving him."
"But nobody asked you to do that," Lantis said suddenly, recalling Hikaru's voice in his voice. "Nobody ever asked us to forget."

I always loved you in my own way. Just not the way...you wanted.
"That's because nobody has to tell you that you'll never forget. Once you love, there's no turning back. At least for me, I don't have a heart that can move on so easily."
"We don't have to, though. We're not here to forget."
"Sometimes I wish I could."
Lantis paused at Geo's words, rolling them over in his mind before nodding gently. He could still see her in his mind's eyes, on her knees, her hands stretched towards him, tears running down her cheeks. Begging. Forgive me Lantis...
"But then...I wouldn't have ever had him, would I?"
Surprised, Lantis looked to where Geo was fingering the edge of his cup, dark eyes gazing somewhere beyond the man before him. "What?"
The former commander sighed softly, closing his eyes. "Love is a strange thing, isn't it Lantis? The more we need it, the more we push it away. I ask to forget Eagle, but then I would forget everything I had known of him. And the truth is, without at least those to comfort me, my more than my soul would have perished those many years ago when he joined the stars. I guess that moving on means that I have forgive myself for having these thoughts, to forgive myself for letting him go." He paused, "But I'm not ready to do that quite yet."

Lantis mused. Was forgiveness the equivalent of their salvation? Is that what Hikaru truly been asking as she had kneeled him before that day so many years ago?
Geo and he were two of a kind, lost souls without purpose or resolution. But who was the one responsible? Was it Hikaru that Lantis truly needed to forgive? After all, what had she ever done to condemn him to the agony he sought for himself?

"Geo," he asked suddenly, rousing himself, "Whatever happened to Zazu?"

The dark-haired man sighed. "He left. A long time ago. I guess he couldn't take it anymore. He claimed that I was stuck in the past, that I was doing Eagle's memory injustice by wallowing in my misery. The kid could never stand for injustice." Geo paused, taking a sip from his cup. "He was right you know. Always was. He was brilliant that way."

"Yes," Lantis agreed, "I suppose he was. Do you know anything else of him?"

Geo shrugged. "Who knows. Probably found a nice job and wife. Probably got married and moved on with his life. Probably has kids now...Probably is wondering why I never listened to him."

"Probably," Lantis said with a faint ghost of smile, twirling the necklace around his finger.

Both men paused at that, reflecting, before returning to their prior states.

"Ten years," Geo said softly, breaking the silence, "It's really been ten years?"

"Last time I checked."

He whistled. "Quite a while if I do so myself."

Geo was changing the subject; Lantis knew this. He didn't want to change the topic. "Geo," he said slowly, "If you really believe that we have died, that our flame extinguished themselves a long time ago, then why are we still alive? What's our use?"

The other man shrugged. "Who knows. I'm not in control of destiny. That should have become evident to me a long time ago, even before we headed towards Cephiro. But I was foolish and never spoke out against what I thought was wrong. I guess I live on to rectify those errors I made and perhaps keep others from doing the same."

"Have you?" asked Lantis, "Have you managed to rectify them."

"I don't know," Geo admitted, "But I was never one to really look after myself. I was always looking after others."

"Don't we all. We spend so much of our lives worrying about each other that we simply pass ourselves by." Lantis sighed, shifted, looked out the window, then sighed again and folded his hands. "Do you think he's watching?"

Geo looked up, surprised. "Eh?"

"Eagle, Zagato...everyone else we ever lost. Do you think they're watching us? I wonder, sometimes, what they think when they see us down here, wallowing in the past. Do you think they...hate us for it?"

Stretching, Geo contemplated this before frowning. "I would hope not," he rejoined quietly, "It's for his memory that I keep on living." He laughed bitterly. "Funny. His memory destroyed me, yet it's him who I live for anymore."

At Geo's statement, Lantis' mind reached far into the roads of the past and grasped one memory from the bundle he kept hidden away in paths that went on for eternity. Hikaru's voice, sweet and sad all at once, admitting to him after the war her feelings for Eagle. Humorous indeed how it was always the one who ruined him who was constantly on his mind.

"Geo."

A head lifted.

"Hikaru once said to me that we never appreciate those we love until their gone, that we can't possibly comprehend the worth a person until it's no longer there to observe. Do you believe what she said?"

"I...don't know," he admitted, "I always loved him like a brother, and I never stopped loving him. Now it just...hurts when I remember him." Geo shifted uncomfortably, then sighed, before gazing down at the table once more. "Yes, I think she's right. We always take for granted what we have, always hold back the words we always wanted to say before they're gone. I never got a chance to tell him how much he meant to me. Nobody did. All he ever heard from us was how fantastic his piloting skills were. None of us ever bothered to mention how wonderful the heart behind that pilot's seat was." Bringing his gaze back to bear, Geo said softly, "I guess this was punishment for that."

Lantis reached out a hand, setting it close to the other man's. "Do you really think Eagle would want you suffering?"

Reluctantly, Geo shook his head.

Sighing, Lantis moved his hand a bit closer, fingers brushing lightly against Geo's. "We spent our lives remembering these people...and we killed ourselves for it. We didn't miss a moment with them, yet we let ourselves pass by in an instant. So tell me, Geo, what's left for two lone marauders of the past like you and I?"

The Autozam fidgeted, a muscle in his cheek twitching slightly. "I suppose all that's left is defeating the ghosts of our pasts. Though, I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to do that," he said quietly.

Outside the restaurant, the snow had slowed to a light falling of feathery whiteness that floated down lazily from the sky and settled upon larger piles on the sidewalks. The darkness had not lifted quiet yet, but the storm had quelled to a faint sprinkling. Lantis made this observation accordingly, and Geo commented offhand, "Don't let it fool you. The storms always come back. Sometimes it's strong, other times it's weak, but it always returns. Autozam's weather is unpredictable that way."

Waxing and waning yet always returning. Like the moon and the falling snow, memories of the past came and left, as did life and love. A never ending rhythm that flowed through all their hearts.

Lantis carefully pressed his hand further until it on top of the other's. "Geo, we are dead men, our spirit left us long ago, but I think that maybe, someday...we'll be reincarnated." He turned his eyes to the heavens beyond. "I think they would appreciate that."

Tearful eyes turned to Lantis, a pained look across crossing Geo's face. "I don't know if I can."

Wrapping his hand around Geo's, Lantis answered, "We have to believe first."

Geo hesitated, but then nodded slowly, then turned to his eyes to the window where the sound of a street cleaner caught his attention. The rickety old machine made its way through the avenues, cleaning the snow from where it blocked the roads, clearing the path and allowing a new one to be taken.

Turning back to Lantis, Geo said softly, "I think I can...but I'll need help." His hand tightened around Lantis', and he paused, gazing steadily at his friend. "Lantis, why did you come back to Cephiro?"

"I don't know," Lantis admitted. He paused for a moment before giving Geo a ghost of a smile. "But I'm glad I came anyway."

At that, Geo laughed sardonically. It was the brightest or most glorious sound, still tinged with the old bitterness and sadness that had followed him over the years like a vulture over its prey. But it was a sincere laugh, one that came from the depths of his heart and soul.

And for the two men who had come from nothing to find everything, who were sitting in an old café drinking beverages that neither particularly enjoyed, who were like the moon and falling snow that came and went but always returned, and whose hands intertwined with the silent promise to find strength and compassion in one another, to move on and become incarnate again, it was heaven enough.

He came bustling into the cold in the same fashion he had entered the store, bundled up in heavy clothing with only his lavender eyes appearing over the edge of his scarf. It was midnight, the air was cold and dry, and overhead, Lantis could see the dark swells of clouds as they dropped snow from the sky, the ice particles swirling and dancing around him. He should probably return to his hotel soon.

Lantis began to leave, crossing the street towards the illuminated sidewalk on the other side, but upon reaching his destination, he decided to turn back once and catch a glimpse of the café. Slipping his hand a hand in his pocket, his fingers closed around a cool, smooth item in there. Closing his eyes, Lantis recalled the memory.

"It's getting darker. I should get going."

Geo looked up, glancing towards the window. The two of them had continued reminiscing about the good days as well as some of the present after the storm calmed down, and as expected, time had passed them by in fleeting seconds.

He nodded. "You should. I probably should get a move on, too. I have to have these papers in by tomorrow. Politics an' all." Geo grinned and winked at Lantis.

The other man just shook his head and laughed. "Whatever Geo. Could you hand me my coat?"

Fulfilling the request, Geo tossed the heavy material to Lantis before he stood himself and walked over to where Lantis was pulling it on along with his various scarves and gloves. His eyes widened. "You think you have enough clothes on?"

Lantis gave Geo a dry smile. "You may be used to the weather here. I'm no native." He reflected for a moment. "And I hope never to be."

"Aww...that hurt Lantis." Geo grinned, but his smile abruptly faded as he reached into his pocket. "Lantis, hold up. I want to give you something."

Turning, Lantis looked on curiously as Geo pulled out a dark blue crystal, much like the one the man wore now, but this one was cracked and faded, no glow to be seen around it.

"Here," he said, holding it out to Lantis, "I want you to take it with you. For memory's sake."

"What is it?" Lantis asked suspiciously.

Pulling the two fragments apart, Geo held it up in the air. "This was one of many energy crystals that Eagle happily destroyed during his training programs. He was always so far ahead of their expectations that the energy filters they gave him were constantly cracking and breaking. They eventually had to start making new ones specifically designed for his brain waves. But this one," he said, pointing, "This one is special. This is the one he broke while battling you."

Lantis took a sudden breath, holding it tightly. He looked down at the item almost reverently as Geo placed it in his hand. "I can't take this," he whispered, "For all I know it's all you have left of him."

Geo shook his head. "No, see? There are two pieces. Besides, I still have the memories. I still have Autozam. I've kept this crystal with me for years, mostly as a reason to dislike you and to hold onto the past for too long." He paused. "I don't want to hold on anymore, but I think that you...I think you need something to hold onto, ne?" And then Geo smiled a glorious smile, and Lantis had no choice but to take it from here and clutch it close to his heart, speechless with grief and joy.

"Thank--Thank you..."

Geo waved a hand. "No, thank you. I don't think I would have ever been able to let it go without you." The man turned his gaze from Lantis, looked to the heavens, then smiled sadly. "Goodbye Eagle." He turned his gaze back to Lantis. "I think that you should return to Cephiro one day. For the sake of those you left behind, or even just for yourself." He motioned to the city around them. "There's a rhythm to the way we live, and its beat is strongest in the places we love most." He gave Lantis the same sad smile. "Go home, Lantis. See the people you love, but then, come back here someday. It'll be a long time before I can fully heal, and I'll need all the help I can get. Besides," he shrugged, "I'll miss you."

Lantis nodded numbly before backing away from the other man and stumbling towards the door. "Goodbye Geo."

The other man nodded a return.

"Goodbye Eagle."

Now on the streets, Lantis sighed, pulling the stone from his pocket to study it. He had wasted so much time remembering that he hadn't lived, and he had blamed unfairly those who had never truly hurt him.

He didn't want to live that way anymore.

Glancing up, the streetlight glowed above his head, the lone lamp alighting the street. It flickered once, weakly, before returning to its steady glow. Lantis held the stone to the light, watching it shimmer and alight once more, almost as if Eagle were still there to strengthen and enliven it.

A lone snowflake waffled down from the sky, landing on the stone, playing on its surface. In the illumination of the lamp post, both shimmered in singularity with the light.

Lantis smiled.

"I'm sorry, Lantis."

"I'm sorry too, Hikaru."

In a sudden gust of wind, the snowflake rose from the stone and into the air. Illuminated by the streetlight, it danced to the beat of the city, twisting and turning and conforming to the ways of the Fate as it trembled, a solitary man on the wings of destiny.

And once it found its rhythm, it was alive and thriving once more.

Final Notes From the Author:

It's hard to say what was on my mind when I wrote this story. I always felt that CLAMP never really gave the Autozams or Lantis an actual resolution to their destiny in the anime version. This story was an attempt to fix that, as well as to bridge the gaps between two characters who obviously didn't get along too well. Whether or not I was successful is your decision.

Geo is a difficult character with a difficult personality. He loves, he hates. He helps, he ignores. He denies, he feels. It's hard to draw much from his character when we see so little of him in the manga and anime, but what we can withdraw is that he cared for Eagle a great deal. In some cases, we can interpret that as shounen-ai. In others, it's a sense of deepest brotherhood. To set things straight, this story was not shounen-ai but brotherhood. And that goes for Lantis as well.

Lantis, too, is a strange one. He can appear cold and distant, yet at other times, he's exceedingly warm and affectionate. We know that he grieved the loss of his brother, but we see it so very little. I consider Lantis, like Geo, to be a character who withholds his grief inside of his heart.

I know that a couple of you aren't too happy that Lantis and Hikaru broke up. Well, quite frankly, after reading the manga and seeing the anime, I can't see them ending up together. *shrugs* One, Hikaru's too young to understand monogamous, marriageable love, and two, she loves too many. I think that, realistically, she would end up marrying someone from her own world. From what I've seen, she considers Eagle and Lantis to be very dear and beloved friends, brinking on the edge of lovers, but not quite there. Hence why this story is written the way it is. Maybe I'll write it out someday.

Now, to the dedication. A few months ago, Bearit wrote an amazing piece of fanfiction that had Lantis and Geo talking shortly after the anime took place. It was poignant and touching, realistic yet hopeful, and it motivated Chao-chan into writing that Lantis and Geo fic that she had always wanted to work on. So this dedicated was a way of thanking Bearit for her wonderful story. (*cough* Not to mention an apology for not reviewing it yet.)

I do hope you enjoyed this story. I know I enjoyed writing it, and I thank you for reading it. ^_^ Have a nice day!

© Veronica Shields

May 19, 2002