"Tamaki Fujioka"

"Tamaki and Haruhi Fujioka"

Tamaki sat by himself in Music Room 3, well after the Host Club was finished. The sun was beginning to set, but Tamaki couldn't have cared less.

"Tamaki Fujioka," he sighed happily, cupping his face in his hands. "It's such a great name."

"Uh, Boss," Hikaru sighed.

"It doesn't work like that," Kaoru finished.

"What are you guys doing here?" Tamaki swiveled around, face on fire. He had thought he was alone.

The twins smirked simultaneously. "We were fooling around behind the couch the whole time, and you didn't even notice."

It took the blonde boy a few seconds to figure out what "fooling around" meant, and he did a double take. "WHAT?!"

"Yeah," Kaoru mumbled. "With all the noise we were making-"

"You were making," Hikaru corrected.

"Hey. You said you wouldn't keep telling people that." Hikaru smirked and shrugged, and Kaoru forgave him instantly.

"...Should I leave?" Tamaki shifted in his seat.

"No." Kaoru planted a firm hand on the blonde boy's shoulder.

"Listen, Boss. We have a few things to tell you." Hikaru wrapped his arm around Tamaki's neck. "Are you listening?"

Tamaki nodded like a good little boy, and Kaoru took it from there. "If you were to marry Haruhi..."

"Which would never happen, she's way out of your league..."

"But let's say that in some crazy circumstance, you actually got her to marry you..."

"She would take your last name. Not the other way around. Haruhi Souh."

"B-but," Tamaki stuttered. "I like Tamaki Fujioka better! Maybe I could adopt her instead."

"That wouldn't change the situation at all," both twins said with a disappointed tone, raising their shoulders into defeated shrugs.

"And you have to be old enough anyways." Hikaru shook his head. "A couple more years, maybe-"

"Then I'll just wait a couple more years!" Tamaki said, jumping to his feet and fist pumping.

"Boss, are you forgetting something?" Kaoru yanked him back down with a surprising force. "You have to get legal consent from her actual guardian. And her dad hates you."

"Its hilarious," Hikaru added truthfully.

"Fine," Tamaki mumbled. "You guys just do whatever you want, and leave me alone with my dreams."

"Sure." Hikaru looked at Kaoru, and Kaoru looked at Hikaru, and Tamaki was ready to run when both boys stood up.

"MY EYES!" Tamaki screamed. The red-headed boys were completely naked.

"You know you want it," Hikaru said in a low voice, shaking his hips around. Though the effect was lost on Tamaki, who had unzipped an expensive pillow and shoved his head into it.

The twins watched as the Tamaki stumbled across the room, running into various objects. Unlike Haruhi, he only seemed to injure himself rather than expensive vases. Finally he yanked the door open and fell out of the room.

"I think that was our best one yet," Kaoru said, picking up their neatly folded clothes from where they were stored behind the couch.

"Yeah. That was great. All that planning turned out to be worth it in the end." Hikaru laughed to himself as they pulled on their uniforms.

The twins high fived, walking out of the room hand in hand.

A/N: Don't ask me how the Twins planned that. Maybe they passed notes from behind the couch? And why were they there in the first place? Were they stalking Tamaki to quench their undying thirst of humiliating him? And what was with the sudden perverted character change in Hikaru? I will leave all this to the minds of the readers. Leave a comment and it won't benefit you at all. But don't leave a comment and... oh whatever, just read this.

Hikaru and Kaoru crouched in Music Room 3, pressed up against each other from behind the curtain. Earlier they had heard him humming to himself about "oh what a wonderful wedding it will be, or maybe a grand ceremony." They were surprised that Tamaki knew how to rhyme, so they followed him around for the next 10 minutes. Unfortunately, he sang the same sentence over and over again for so long they though something had snapped inside his head.

"We have to shut him up," Hikaru said, ripping out some hair.

"Look, Hikaru, he's sitting down." They watched him plop down on the couch in Music Room 3, and he began to talk about how Haruhi's last name was so sugoi and he wanted it instead of his.

"Kaoru." Hikaru said, smirking.

"Hikaru," Kaoru said, eye's gleaming.

"I have an idea."

A/N: Okay that's better. Leave a comment and I will think about my use of sugoi and how it probably wasn't grammatically correct but this is Tamaki we're talking about. Hope you enjoyed!