"Are you Wyatt's little brother?" Phoebe asked hesitantly.
Chris's head jerked up and he started at her, shock etched in every line of his face. He opened his mouth and then shut it as though unsure of how to answer and finally said, in a voice just above a whisper "Only if I can get Piper and Leo back together in time…"
Phoebe stood still, shock mirrored on her face. She stood, with a faraway look on her face as though processing it all and putting all the pieces together. She stood still and then turned and walked to the door and went out, without a word.
Chris bit his lip trying to keep from showing any pain on his face, refusing to give into that. Well what did I expect, Chris though to himself, they all did not like me here, I shouldn't have thought that knowing this would suddenly make all the difference, that we'd all be one big happy family.
Chris turned back to the door when he heard a slight sound, almost like a muffled sob. And there she stood, at the doorway, eyes wet and trying to hide it. She did not look at him, but looked at the floor and finally she met his eyes and she seemed to be searching for something. And apparently she found it, for she gave him a hesitant smile and slowly moved forward. When she got within a few feet of him she stopped and slowly, looking completely unsure, she held out her arms. Clearly it was the right move, for Chris fell into them as though it was a lifeline he had been looking for but had been afraid never to find. He clung to her, as though afraid that if he eased up in the slightest she would disappear. And she let him, holding him equally tight, trying to put all her feeling into that moment.
Finally Chris pulled back and Phoebe let him go with reluctance.
"How did you know?" Chris asked.
"Well I in my vision quest I saw Piper with two boys, and with that clue, I kinda just put all the other hints and pieces together" Phoebe told him.
"I was always afraid one of your premonitions would give me away" Chris said.
"Is it so terrible that I know?" Phoebe asked.
"I don't know. It depends, on what you will do with the information" Chris said.
"I don't know what I'll do, I hadn't thought that far" Phoebe said.
"You can't tell anyone, it could mess up the future. You even weren't supposed to know, but too late now. We can't risk things being changed even more" Chris said.
"Well I got that vision for a reason, so maybe I was supposed to know" Phoebe said.
"Either way it's irrelevant, you can't tell them, promise me you won't" Chris pleaded.
"Alright, alright, I promise" Phoebe said.
"Thanks, I knew I could count on you Aunt Phoebe" Chris said.
"What? Aunt Phoebe?" Phoebe said.
"Oh, sorry, I slipped" Chris said.
"No, that's okay, I guess it just hasn't totally sunk in yet, but its okay, I like it" Phoebe said.
"So now what?" Chris asked.
"I don't know, what would my future self do now usually? Are we close in the future?" Phoebe asked.
Chris smiled and said "Oh ya, you're practically my best friend in the future. I tell you everything; you've always been there for me, when no one else is. When mom is too busy worrying about Wyatt, not that I can blame her, raising the twice blessed kid is tough on her, and dad, well he's not around much. And Paige is always on her independent kick and puts her charges first. But you, you've always been there. You've been the one to go to my parent teacher conferences when mom was too busy. You were the one who taught me to ride a bike, and to drive. You were the one I told everything too. Hell, you were even the one to give me the "talk" and that sure was a memorable experience."
Phoebe laughed "Oh no, please tell me I did not."
"Sorry, but ya did. No one else had the time, or thought of me as grown up enough" Chris said.
"You make it sound like Piper had no time for you" Phoebe commented.
"Oh it's not like that. I love my mom, more than anything. But well, she's really busy in the future. And Wyatt's a terror, always getting new powers and misusing them by mistake. She has to dedicate so much time to him, it's not her fault and I can't blame her. Hell if she hadn't he'd probably be even eviler now than he already is. And as I said, Leo's not really around to help, so you just kinda took his place. You and I, we've always had a bond, the way you tell it, ever since I was born. You were just always the one that I knew I could turn to. I'm told that my first word was 'ebe, mind you mom was not too thrilled about that, but you were" Chris said.
"'ebe?" Phoebe asked.
"Okay, I was very little, I learned to say your name right with time, you are supposed to be flattered" Chris said.
Phoebe grinned "Well, I like the sound of it. Sounds very endearing. So do we talk a lot, I mean in the future?"
"Oh ya, all the time, about everything" Chris said.
"So I'm the cool aunt" Phoebe stated.
"Defiantly, you've always been my favorite aunt" Chris said.
"Excellent" Phoebe said, "So since you say that we talk, why don't we talk now."
"What do you mean?" Chris asked.
"Oh come on Chris, I can feel how much stress and emotional pain you are under" Phoebe said.
"Now that sounds like the Aunt Phoebe I remember, never letting me hide anything" Chris said.
"True, which is why I'm not gonna let you change the subject like that" Phoebe said.
"Well… it was worth a try" Chris said.
"Well now its tried, so spill" Phoebe said and took his arm and pulled him down on the couch.
"I just don't know where to start, or how to start and not tell you too much" Chris said.
"Stop worrying, I'm the adult here, for once you let me worry about these things and just talk to me, I think that you need to talk" Phoebe said.
"I just can't, I don't know that if I start, talking about it all, that I can stop" Chris said sounding near breaking point. I can't, I can't risk telling her anything, I might change things. And I don't want to hurt her, and it will hurt her to hear what is going to happen, I don't want to burden her, I just can't, Chris thought to himself.
"Chris, I can feel your pain, and it's so strong I'm almost hearing your thoughts. Please stop worrying about me, for once think about yourself, you can't keep holding it in like this, no one can do that indefinitely." Phoebe said worry thick in her voice.
"Don't worry about me, I've been managing fine so far, really" Chris told her.
"Maybe so, but you're hurting, and it hurts me to feel that. So if nothing else, tell me for my sake. Chris, baby, I want to help, let me help you" Phoebe pleaded.
"I can't, you should just go, then you won't feel this all, I don't mean to hurt you" Chris told her.
"I know you don't mean to, but I'm still not leaving, not till you tell me and let me help" Phoebe said.
"But its not like that, its not just some story that I can tell, its just everything, and believe me, I was serious in saying that if I got started I don't think I could stop" Chris told her.
"Then don't, I don't have any pressing plans and we can talk all night if needed" Phoebe told him.
"It's just that…" Chris trailed off, wiping away the tears that had started to trail down his face. "It's just too close, too close to the time and I'm scared that I won't make it. I thought I gave myself enough time, but now, now I'm not so sure. I've screwed things up so much, and now I may have pushed it too far. But I needed him out of the way, I did, I just did not realize it would mess with me, I did not think that far ahead, I was just improvising and I was not thinking."
"Okay Chris, I want to be here for you, but you aren't making any sense" Phoebe said.
"I'm sorry, I'm babbling" Chris said.
"That's okay, just let it out" Phoebe told him.
"It's just that my birthdate, is about nine months from now, and well Piper's starting to date again and this shouldn't be happening, and the way things are going now, I may never be born. I screwed things up totally. And if I'm not born no one will come back to warn you and Wyatt will still turn evil. Not that my being here has helped with that at all, I'm a failure there too. I haven't gotten any closer to finding the demon that turns him."
"You're not a failure, you should be proud of yourself. Not too many people would do all this, come back to save their brother, and all of humanity for that matter. You have done so much already, and we will find the demon and save Wyatt, have faith" Phoebe told him
"I have to, I just have to. I can't, I won't go back to the future if it's not different, I'd rather die, I will die" Chris said and broke down completely.
Phoebe pulled him over to her so he was almost in her lap and he curled up burying his face against her shoulder and sobbing as though his world was falling apart. She just held him, as he cried and shook, and held him as he sobbed and ranted. The whole while murmuring comforting words and rubbing his back.
"I'm sorry, I did not mean to break down like that" Chris said softly, almost an hour later.
"Its okay, I have a feeling that you've been holding that in for a long time, probably from even before you came here" Phoebe said.
Chris nodded as if embarrassed. Phoebe gave him a gentle smile and then said "Feel better?"
"Ya, surprisingly" Chris said.
"Good. Think you might actually be able to get some sleep tonight, because no offense you look like you haven't had a good night sleep in a long long time" Phoebe said.
Chris looked thoughtful and then said, his voice laced with surprise "Ya, I actually think I might be able to sleep."
"Good" Phoebe said and she pulled him into another tight hug. Then she got up and leaned down to kiss him on the forehead. Phoebe said softly "Goodnight babyboy, get some sleep. We can talk more later. I love you."
"Good night Aunt Phoebe, thank you. I love you too" Chris said.
Phoebe smiled and turned and walked out the door.
Chris sat still for a few moments and then a smile, perhaps the first real smile that had graced his face since he had came here, flashed over his face. Maybe things would work out after all. He felt his heart, which had been slowly hardening and bleeding for months, he felt is start to warm, and to heal. I felt hope, that maybe all wasn't lost.