Disclaimer: GoGo Sentai Boukenger does not belong to me.

Haunted by the Past

Masumi blinked his eyes open and found it was still dark outside. Fumbling for his clock, he frowned when he realised it was still the early hours of the morning. What had woken him? He got his answer a moment later at the sudden movement at his side, accompanied by a choked off cry. Looking over at the man who was spending more and more time in his bed of late, Masumi was disturbed by the distressed expression on Souta's face and he leant across to swipe at the nearest arm.

"Souta, wake up. Just because you're having a nightmare doesn't mean you should wake up everyone else."

Nothing. Not even the jibe had any effect. He shook Souta's arm in an attempt to wake him up. "Souta, wake up." When that resulted in failure as well, Masumi bit his lip then shook a bit harder. A split second later he was flat on his back with an arm across his throat, cold eyes staring down at him. His attempts to dislodge Souta failed, one after the other, and his vision was beginning to blur as his throat burned, his breaths coming in strangled gasps. Then, suddenly, the arm was gone and he could move again. He sat up slowly, his breathing rate coming back to normal, and that was when he saw Souta sitting against the wall, arms wrapped round his knees, face buried in his lap, shoulders shaking.

Hesitating only a moment, he got out of bed and went to kneel down in front of his… whatever Souta was. "Souta, are you alright?" He instantly berated himself the moment he said it, of course he wasn't alright. He wouldn't be curled up in a ball of misery if he was alright. When he didn't get any response, yet again, he gently rested a hand on one of the shaking shoulders in attempt to… do something, soothe maybe? he wasn't sure. His stomach tightened as Souta flinched under the light touch - this was definitely not good. "Hey, look at me."

The light brown head remained stubbornly between the owner's knees and Masumi scowled to himself. He'd forgotten how stubborn Souta could be behind the sunny exterior. Well, he was stubborn too, and he'd be damned if he'd let Souta win this battle of wills. Taking his hand off the Up High Adventurer's shoulder, he manoeuvred his fingers under the other man's chin and inexorably forced his head up. "I said, look at me."

The moment he set eyes on Souta's face, he wished he hadn't pushed the point. The eyes that had been so cold a few minutes ago were now bright with unshed tears and the expression was one of self-loathing, a self-disgust that was so strong it hurt to look at. He'd never seen that look on Souta's face before and he never wanted to see it again, it was so at odds with the other man's perpetually cheerful smile.

While Takoaka Eiji had easily replaced Souta as the Most Annoying Person Ever, and while there were times he thought he'd scream with frustration if Akashi did that finger snapping "Attack" thing one more time, the constant smile Souta wore always seemed calculated to send his blood pressure through the roof, apart from the times when said smile was seductive and calculated to send his blood pressure through the roof for entirely different and much more pleasurable reasons. Right now though, he'd give anything to see that irritating smile instead of this self-hate.

"Hey, it's okay."

"I almost killed you." Souta's voice was tight and rough and nothing like his usual confident tones.

"But you didn't. Bad dream?"

Slow nod. "Yes, but--"

"There you go then. I'm guessing you thought you were still dreaming and reacted accordingly. Any of us would have done the same." It might even be true. They all had their nightmares, even Natsuki, although he doubted she would ever wake suddenly and homicidally. The others… maybe. Even himself.

"But--"

"But nothing. It was a bad dream and it's over now. Come back to bed."

"But--"

"Why do you never listen? Come back to bed. We can deal with this in the morning if you really want to." Not. He had no intention of continuing this conversation in the morning, not unless it was absolutely necessary. The sooner Souta returned to normal the happier he'd be.

He wasn't sure how this thing they had had started, how or when it had somehow become more than simply fucking each other senseless, if had ever only been about fucking each other senseless in the first place, but whatever it was, it was important to him and he wasn't going to lose it, not for any reason. It had started out simply enough, when suddenly all he could think about was Souta's ass in those trousers; the way his mouth went dry at the way the Up High Adventurer moved, his grace and agility obvious to anyone with eyes; when it was all he could do not to reach out and touch, but then it had started to get complicated. Even now it was surprising to him that Souta, womaniser extraordinaire, had made the first move, a move which had eventually led to them ending up in bed together, a circumstance that had continued to happen so often it had become semi-official, even if they never actually spoke about it.

Gently he coaxed Souta back to the bed, clamping down on the instinct to make some smart-ass comment or just drag the other man across the room. Either of those routes would make Souta shut down again and that was simply not an option. When they were both back in bed he hesitated before wrapping an arm round the slim waist next to him and burying his face in Souta's shoulder, deliberately relaxing his body. He figured the former spy would know he wasn't asleep, even if he pretended to be, but slowly the body next to his relaxed slightly, going from being as tightly strung as taut wire to something that would maybe resemble relaxed in an alternate dimension or something.

For his own part, Masumi couldn't sleep, his mind going round in circles. While he knew his… boyfriend? was a former spy, he'd never really considered the implications of that and suddenly that was all he could think about. His own life hadn't exactly been the most virtuous, but he was pretty sure that that didn't compare with the kind of things a spy would have to do. What kind of things had Souta done in his life before SGS? before the change of heart that led to him giving up his spying days. He didn't like to think about the fact that the man sleeping/not-sleeping next to him, a man he trusted with his life, had done things that would be considered morally reprehensible by most people. How much damage had Souta done? Had he deliberately hurt people? No, that last he couldn't believe. By accident, maybe, in his search for the ultimate rush, but he couldn't imagine Souta going out of his way to hurt someone. Well, not an innocent someone, anyway. Still, the coldness in Souta's eyes before… that didn't match up with the man Masumi knew, the man who would willingly throw himself in front of blaster fire to protect a team-mate.

He sighed in frustration. This was ridiculous. Whatever Souta had done, it was in the past and had nothing to do with the person he was now. Telling himself that didn't work quite as well as he'd hoped it would and, combined with the restless tossing and brief wakings up only to fall asleep again of the man next to him, it wasn't surprising that he didn't get much sleep that night either.