Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Harry Potter. I came up with this fic in between classes. It began as a discussion on the issue of Tweens. I do realise that Tweens are a relatively new phenomenon sweeping the globe but I wanted to see what would happen if they had emerged in the time of the Marauders. Enjoy. Giantitis.

"My sister's a Prostitot."

James looked over at her quizzically. "A what?"

Lily threw her book bag onto the grass before collapsing next to Remus. "You know! A Tween!"

"I'm sorry, I don't speak girl," said James sarcastically.

Remus' muffled voice piped up from behind the textbook he had been reading, "It's the term used for a new generation of premature adolescent girls that are emerging who wear mini-skirts and carry around toy poodles in their handbags."

"Excuse my ignorance, but what's wrong with mini-skirts? If it were up to me, our national dress would be the mini-skirt!" James added, much to Lily's disapproval.

"I agree! Mini-skirts are great! They go with just about anything," Sirius mocked "You can dress them up or down and wear them anywhere!" He had gotten up off the grass and was doing his own rendition of a catwalk strut. Flinging his imaginary handbag over his shoulder.

"Mini-skirts are even better if you get to see what's underneath 'em!" Peter wagged his eyebrows up and down at James.

Sirius momentarily stopped his strutting. "The key part of that sentence Wormtail was 'If you ever get to see what's underneath'. But if a girl does end up letting you within ten feet of her, I'd seize the opportunity…it may be the first and last chance you ever get."

At this, Peter ditched a pebble at Sirius, "Not funny."

"Can we focus please!" interrupted Lily. "This is a serious problem concerning the sexualization of children! Society is promoting this image of little girls as sex-objects for dirty old men to google at."

James shrugged, "Boys will be boys."

"Is this a purely muggle thing?" Sirius asked, "'Cos I don't think these 'Tweenies' have exactly had a huge impact on the wizarding world."

"It will eventually. Muggles and wizards don't exactly live in complete isolation." Lily continued, "And anyway, it affects me because my sister is one!"

James had been noticing lately that Lily had begun to look increasingly stressed whenever the topic of family had come up in conversation.

"Are you sure it's not just Putrid being herself? I mean, maybe she had a realisation and has decided to 'come out'.

"Don't call her Putrid, James. Anyway I know it's not just her! They're everywhere! It's an epidemic!

Sirius folded his arms into a thinking pose, "So, you're saying that there's a cult of mini-skirt-wearing-hotties that's multiplying by the minute?"

"YES!" Lily replied heatedly.

"Well…" Sirius urged.

"Well what?" Lily asked

"Where do we sign up?" Sirius asked, his face beaming. At this James burst out in a fit of laughter and began to rock from side to side.

"Don't be so disgusting!" Lily got up off the grass; "I can't believe you two are making a joke out of something that is a serious issue!"

Remus' nose popped up from inside his book, "Believe it", he said matter-of-factly.

James who had tears streaming down his cheeks started off Sirius who began to giggle. Looking up at Lily he mocked, "Would you like a tiss-ewe for your iss-ewe?"

A gob-smacked Lily lowered her eyelids, "Male chauvinist pigs!" She then swept up her bag in one violent movement and began trudging back towards the castle.

Remus watched her leave and then turned to watch a giggling James and Sirius rolling his eyes.