BELLA

He is gone. Long gone. I thought that my life was over. I was wrong. It goes on without me. Jacob helps, but my life is still hollow. My heart is still shattered. Something snaps me out of it. I cannot figure it out. One day I am incomplete and the next, I realize that no one should have that big of an effect on my life … well, at least not if they are really going to leave me flat. He broke my heart. They abandoned me without so much as a backward glance or goodbye. They betrayed me. All of them. They led me on. I really loved them while they only saw me as a distraction from their eternal walk of this earth. It is right at that moment this I swear I will not be so easily deceived again.

Months later

My life has found some sort of equilibrium. Jacob helps. He helps a lot. My heart does not feel so shattered anymore. The healing is slow, but it is happening. I feel like this may be the start of something close to happiness. It could even become a real happiness. Sure, there was that rough patch when Jacob didn't talk to me, but we worked through that. So he can transform into a horse-sized wolf. Is that any worse than an undead bloodsucker? What I feel toward him is not what I felt toward him. It's different, but it's getting to be almost as strong. I guess we'll just have to wait and see how things develop.

"Bells, you're going to be late on your first day."

Huh? Did Charlie just say what I think he did? I'm too deep in sleep to know for sure.

"What?" I call out.

"Don't want to be late for your first day at Forks High," he repeats.

Well, I'll be damned. I did hear him right. Wait … what the hell? Somehow I manage to crack an eye open. Well, the sun is up at least. Sitting up, I peer around my room, and there is nothing even hinting of them. But then, was there anything like that still around anyway? I had done a purge, after all. He did a great job of clearing a lot of stuff out, but I took care of anything else that reminded me of them. This is beyond ridiculous. Where are my school books? Even if this is some kind of elaborate joke, Charlie would never hide those.

"Hey, where are my textbooks?"

"You don't get those until you go to class. I thought that kind of thing was pretty standard … anyway, I'm heading to work," Charlie shouts up the stairs.

"Um, okay. See you after school, I guess," I respond automatically.

Heading for the bathroom, I bump into my nightstand, causing my CD player and CDs to fly everywhere. I will just have to pick that up later. Confusion clouds my mind. I have to deal with my first day? But, I've been here for months and months. Fortunately, I somehow manage to get ready without really paying attention to what I am doing.

On my way out the door to my truck, I glance at the calendar more out of habit than anything. What I see makes me stop mid-stride. If that is really accurate, then this is my first day at Forks High again. Also, I'm seventeen. Weird.

It's official. This has to be my first day. Everyone, but everyone, has called me Isabella. I have to get my schedule. Mike is starting his puppy routine. Jessica is completely nice in a fake sort of way. Lauren avoids acknowledging my presence. Angela is completely nice in her genuine way.

By the time lunch rolls around, people are amazed at my ability to remember their names. Well, this is easier than my real first day by a lot. I grab my lunch and head over to sit with Jessica and her group. Aaaaaaand, of course, they make their usual entrance.

"That's the Cullen family…" Jessica starts.

"I don't really care who they are." I shut her down. What I really wanted to say was that I don't care who they think that they are, but I can't very well say that and get away without an explanation.

"Why?" she gasps. I forgot how they are such a big topic of conversation.

"They just don't strike me as friendly, and I don't care for people who seem to elevate themselves," I hastily explain.

"They do seem to separate themselves kind of literally," Angela says thoughtfully. Hope they enjoy that little tidbit as I know they heard everything.

Maybe it's just a bit of a flashback, but I swear he is burning holes right through me. I'm not going to lie. Ignoring him is not going to be easy. My body has decided to mutiny. My heart tugs at the idea that we are in the same room, even if that room is a giant cafeteria. Suddenly, it's hard to breathe. He feels so close.

Wait. Get a hold on reality, Bella. Let's not forget the important things - things that will happen if you let them. He left you. He didn't want you. None of them wanted you, not really. They would have said goodbye, at least, if any of them truly cared. To be fair, feelings don't just go away because you want them to. So, of course, I will still have those to deal with. But I know how they really feel. Take a deep breath. Life goes on. Don't fall into the deception again. Last time almost broke me. If it had not been for Jacob, that is. The memories wash over me, and anger accompanies them. They lied to me, led me on about how they cared for me. Who are they to do that to anyone?

I smirk as I head to biology. At least here, knowing how I affect him, the almighty vampire will get a taste of wanting something that he cannot have. Well, he can't have it this time anyway. Steeling myself for my body's reaction, I go to see the teacher for my book and seat assignment.

He glares at me while I head to the only empty seat. That seat just happens to be right beside him. Like last time, I use my hair like a curtain between us. Unlike last time, I do not peek through it. I can feel his eyes on me, probably tracing my veins while he plots on how to kill me and the witnesses in the room. For some reason, I am not afraid. Fear should be the appropriate response. Yet it does not come. If I can act differently, change my past this time around, he certainly can act differently. But this is the first time for him, I think, and I already know how that plays out.

As vindictive as it sounds, I grin at his obvious discomfort. I almost giggle at his hasty exit as the bell rings. Huh, I did not expect that reaction to come from me. I feel lighter now that I don't have to worry about him and all the baggage that comes with him. Maybe I'm just a bit apathetic since my minor meltdown during lunch.

I notice a glare tossed at me from Rosalie after the last bell. Emmett, Jasper, and Alice all just look confused. He has already made for Alaska, then. Somehow thinking the names makes the pain lessen a bit. The things you notice the second time through. I mean, before, all I remember was his reaction in the office … shit. I almost forgot to turn in my paperwork. Turning on my heel, I head back in the direction of the office.

"Hey, Bella!" someone calls from behind me. I turn and smile at Angela.

"Hey," I greet her when she catches up.

"Um, don't forget to turn your stuff in to the office. The secretary can get a bit cranky about that kind of thing. You might need to be on her good side, you know, if you need a schedule change." She looks really worried.

"I'm headed that way now. Thanks," I answer her.

"It's just that I happened to walk past the office, and I wasn't trying to overhear anything, I swear! But Edward, one of the Cullens, got pretty loud about switching out of your biology class …" she trails off.

"Angela, I know you only heard anything like that by accident," I assure her.

She grins at me in relief. Man, I was so caught up in with the vampire drama that I really did not see what a great friend Angela is.

" …if you need some help catching up." She is saying something to me, but I missed the first part.

"Thanks. That would be perfect actually." I figure she is talking about school work.

We make plans to work after dinner at Charlie's house. Angela is amazing. Why not become friends? I know she won't be like some others I could mention.