Disclamer: I own nothing…away with you.

AU- My first fan-fic. Hope you enjoy. R&R please. Im not too happy with the beginning ,but I think it gets better.

Yuki's Halloween from Hell

Yuki was in a bad mood. It was Halloween and all Yuki wanted to do was to go to sleep after a long day of

" Hey Yuki come and trick-or-treat with us"

"No,Yuki, is gunna come to my party"

"Yea, right. He is so coming to the haunted house with me. Aren't you Yuki-kun?"

"Hey yuki-kun ,aren't my bunny ears adorable."

Of course Tohru wanted him to go trick-or-treating with him and the other Sohmas. Tohru was truely the greatest friend one could ask for , but he was reaching a boiling point and her unrelenting begging made him want to yell " leave me the fuck alone,Tohru" Being the gentlemen he was , it translated into Yuki speech as "Fine, of course Ms.Honda."

Yuki came out of his room looking extremely murderous. This year the whole family had decided to dress up as their zodiac. Even Kyo had on his cat ears and tail, looking somewhat peeved ,but mostly purple since Kagura had him in her death grip.

"No" was what Yuki simply said as everyone turned to him with a suspiciously large smile. There was no way in hell he was putting on mouse ears.

"oh, but Yuki the ears look great" Tohru said

"Yea, you look like the damn rat you are" said a slightly choking Kyo.

Haru suddenly grabbed Yuki from the back and praised him for being the cutest rat ever. Yuki was too embarssed to do anything. When Tohru and Kyo had been distracted by a happily candy hyper Mommiji, Haru whispered in Yuki's ear ' Being a rat you can get a ride on the ox's back if you like."

Yuki quickly jumped out of Haru's embrace. "Har r u.. did you turn black?"

"No time for talking, lets have some fun"

Yuki leapt out of the way just in time ,causing the overly excited ox to crash into an unexpecting monkey ,ripping off its tail "O dear Im so sorry, so sorry, my tail was in your way. NO come BACK, IM SORRY!"

It seems that being that close to Yuki in some too tight pants, a tail,and rat ears had made Haru turn black.

"Come back my sweet Yuki" Haru yelled as he ran after the rat.

Yuki didn't hear it though because he had already sprinted down some blocks down. Than he took a right, knowing Haru would probably get lost.

But what he didn't know was that that had been a mistake.

"This party is a bore"

"They promised Yuki would come"

"Yuki's the best though"

"Yeah " Siiiigh

"O YUKII!"

"Yea, I know , he's the greatest"

"No, I mean he's over there"

SCCCREACHHH (too bad that there isn't a word as annoying as the sound, but you get the picture)

Yuki had been running down the street with his head turned backwards, so he could see if Haru was still chasing him, but what he didn't know was that the Prince Yuki fan Club was having their Halloween Party right outside which he was running right into. Annnndd insert annoying screach. And Yuki's face of horror and CUT. (You don't want to see that part, scary-violent-obsessive-rabid-fangirls.)(ok fine so am I but fuck off its my story)

Yuki ran for his life , half of his shirt torn off, and his back pockets ripped off…The girls thought it would be nice to have a piece of cloth that had been close to his aaaAYAME was walking around the corner. He had to get off a little late, because his cough Romance shop was extremely busy on Halloween. Hand-cuffs always sold out on Halloween. Probably because people were scared of burglars. Yeaaa Anyways Yuki had never been so happy to see his brother. He ran behind him and since Ayame was such a good hiding place being plentiful in hair and fur, the girls ran right past them.

"Hello lovely little brother, I've been looking all over for you"

"He-- Hel—hello Ayame, for once I'm glad to see you"

Ayame's eyes blurred with tears of happiness. Had his brother actually said he was happy to see him? "O I love you Yuki" Aya said as he squeezed the little air he had out of Yuki's body. "That's why I made this outfit just for you. Its good I did , seeing what your wearing"

Yuki smiled. He would be happy to get out of his ripped, sweaty, and bloody clothes.

Guess what Yuki had to do after Aya showed him the outfit. Did you guess? Come on now……………... yes more running.. After Aya showed his brother the belt and strapped black leather body suit with a whip and feather boa, little brother just simply refused. Big brother would not take this after making the costume with much love and dedication so he succeeded in practically killing little brother by suffocating him with the purple boa.

Feeling trapped a very flustered and tired rat decided to hide in the house ,which had its door open. Gasping for air Yuki finally thought he had escaped, but that would be just too easy. A rough hand suddenly grabbed Yuki by the arm.

"Welcome to the spoookky hauuunted hooouuuuuse woOoOOo. "

"Um, I'm sorry I didn't realize,umm im going to go outside now"

"You cannot escappppeeee woOOoooO"

" No really Im serious. I am jus---- "

The man pushed Yuki further into the house and two little girls who had entered after him decided to shove as well.

"Fine just great..I'll just go through tha—"

"WoOOooooO" a demon that looked suspiciously like a bootleg Inuyasha popped out.

"Yea I got that part, wooo"

The girls behind him giggled

"GGrroowl" a 3 eyed monster with fangs and blood dripping out his mouth and a human head in hand said.

"wow" giggle giggle

Than a rabid fan girl popped out "I love yoooouu!"

AHHHH The two little girls grabbed Yuki by the waist and

POOF sparkle sparkle

A real flustered and tired rat scrambled out of the house hoping the girls thought it was just part of the show.

"Phew,im so going home" But since it wasn't Yuki's day he POOFed sparkle sparkled back into a human a little too early. He leapt behind a bush and squated….

"Just GREAT THIS IS SO FU..calm down yuki, don't be a stupid cat about this lets calm down" So Yuki patiently, trying to keep his cool,walked back squatting behind a pole or bush whenever he saw someone close by.

Yuki saw a shortcut if he could just cut through this backyard, he'd be there in no time.

"I can't wait. Minoru will be so surprised."

"He was complaining ,because everyone one forgets its birthday, since its on Halloween"

"His mom is bringing him home from Sura's now ,through the back gate."

"Yea who would ever expect a surprise party in the backyard"

Who would ever expect a surprise party in the back yard? Weirdos.

Yuki opened the gate and walked through thinking of his nice comfy bed when

SURPRISE!

The backlights turned on and Yuki stared in disbelief for he was looking at a bunch of little kids with birthday hats on and their parents.

AHHH IT'S A PERVERT!RAPIST!

"No no, this is a mistake." It was too late, he was chased out by angry mothers holding large wrapped gifts and bowls of food as weapons.

"Ow no, wait, listen ow"

Yuki didn't think he could run any longer and to hhis relief a hand grabbed him by the arm and into a near by bush. He turned around to thank his savior, to find himself facing the last person he wanted to see in his current condition.

"Haru! You wouldn't happen to be white would you"

"Thanks for making my job easier." He tackled Yuki pinning him down. And than Haru grabbed a bodypart every man takes pride in, Yuki's was very large in fact, it also happens to be a sensitive area of the body.

Did you guess, that's right the earlobe. So when Haru grabbed Yuki's earlobe he let out a screamed so loud that everyone in, the neighborhood, no the city, no in the whole country could hear him.

Tohru and her band of zodiac hear him. The fangirls heard him. Ayame heard him. The haunted house ghouls heard him. The angry band of mothers heard him. And all went towards him and gathered around the bush for the happy next part of this story.

The scream was loud enough to send Haru flying out the bushes and across the street in a jumbled heap.

Yuki came out looking disheveled and pissed. More pissed than he ever was. More pissed than if he had drank 500 gallons of cola. More pissed than a drunken hobo.(take that either way)

"AHHH WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PEOPLES PROBLEM…" he addressed the crowd

"I DIDN'T WANT TO TRICK-OR-TREAT,I DIDN'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY, I DIDN'T WANT TO GO TO A HAUNTED HOUSE,I DIDNT WANT TO DRESS AS A MOUSE OR A STRIPPER, I DIDN'T WANT TO TERRIFY A BUNCH OF LITTLE KIDS, AND NO HARU I DIDNT WANT MY EARLOBE PULLED. SO ALL OF YOU CAN JUST (the following is just a long string of curses,swears,and hexes..some of which made even kyo blush and confused)

SO LEAVE ME ALONE. AND WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ALL STARING AT, AND WHY ARE THERE GIRLS ON THE FLOOR!

Yuki looked down to find himself still naked. Lovely Yuki walked home not caring who saw him in all his glory. He crawled into bed,still in his glory, and slept. He dreamt of a land where people could stay home for Halloween.

END

AU- Poor Yuki. Yes, I know not very pro-haru. I actually wanted to write a YukixHaru instead, but I thought this up and just had to write it. So please R&R, any suggestions, compliments, insults, im open. haru's