Hello! I've written loads of fanfiction in the past but this is my first for OITNB so please don't take this piss if it isn't great. It's a 2-part coffee shop AU from Alex's POV in the beginning then may possibly evolve into Piper's POV in the second half. Random sentences in italics are Alex's thoughts and the lack of speech in this part is 100% intentional. Also, I'm British, so my spelling and certain words I use may be different to yours. Apart from that, ENJOY! This took me bloody ages so please review and let me know what you think! - Abbie xo
beneath the stars came falling on our heads
part 1: you are my sweetest downfall
It is a dark afternoon in New York City, the rolling winter bringing wind and rain and thick clouds along with it. Alex Vause sighs, disgruntled, as she pulls her hood up to shelter her hair from the sinister black sky above. Just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse... She bustles through the hoards of people roaming the streets despite the sudden downpour and seeks immediate refuge somewhere warmer and drier. The weather actually looks a lot like how she feels right now: an absolute mess.
She keeps walking and walking until at last she finds a coffee shop. It's tucked away quietly between two stores she doesn't recognise and, thankfully, doesn't look very busy. It's painted a dark orange all over, the only other colour being the sign above it: 'The Litch' in thick black swirly writing above the door. The shop emmits a soft glow through the windows onto the pavement outside, the heat inside warming her skin right to the bone the second she steps through the door. She orders what looks like the biggest cup of coffee known to man and nestles in a quiet, empty corner with a book in hand, silently thanking the central heating for giving her an excuse to remove her dripping jacket.
She leans back and exhales in relief, sinking further into the welcoming armchair. This is the kind of world she likes. A world away from work. A world without mules and drugs and long flights. A world inside a book with a character that has actually got their shit together. Don't get her wrong - Alex adores her job, she doesn't even want to think about where she'd be if she didn't have it, but sometimes it's a bit much. She's always busy and she always has phone calls to make and emails to write and places to be. Sometimes it's nice to not have to be anywhere. Sometimes it's nice to just be alone. But in the end, loneliness just becomes an acid that eats away at you. She learnt that a very long time ago.
Alex Vause likes being alone. But she's not too keen on being lonely.
So she loses herself in books and drug deals and the occasional fling. (Fling being the operative word; Alex is more of a 'fuck and forget' kinda girl again.) And that's okay. That's her way of coping. She's been coping like this for ages. Eight years, to be exact. Almost eight years to the day that she lost two very important things in her life. The two most important things in her life.
Alex tries not to dwell on stuff like that anymore, especially not in public, an internal battle on a day like today will only lead to a hazy night in a worn-down bar somewhere with a girl whose voice is way too high and whose sexual experience is limited to mainly guys and a messy drunken kiss with a girl in her last year of high school. Ah, curious girls. Alex makes a mental note in her head that she'll always have time for them.
Just as Alex is nearing the end of her book, more people start coming into the coffee shop, though that doesn't mean it gets any louder or any less relaxing. Alex watches people enter, order their drinks and sit down. She notices a lot of the people are couples and they don't give her a second glace as they glide past hand-in-hand. It's funny, for a woman who claims she cares very little for relationships, she always gets this little niggling feeling in her stomach every time she sees people in love. It's like deep down she knows she's missing out on something. Swamped with unwelcome jealousy, she decides that's enough people-watching for the day and attempts to get lost in her novel once again.
That is, until the bell above the door dings again and a laugh follows. A female laugh. A laugh that is all too familiar and all too spine-tingling. She'd recognise that laugh anywhere, and she's almost too afraid to look up.
But she does anyway.
Now, Alex doesn't know much about the in-depth workings of the human body (biology was never her strong point, despite her extensive knowledge of female anatomy) but she does know that feelings of love and attraction are just chemicals in the brain. Feelings of love and attraction aren't connected to the heart or the lungs at all, but are all in the mind. Which confuses her. Because if that's the case, why does her heart beat faster? Why does it become harder to breathe? Why does it feel like her chest is caving in after one tiny glance?
Probably because she looks up to find none other than Piper Chapman.
The same Piper Chapman who left her less than thirty minutes after her mum died. And broke her fucking heart. The same Piper Chapman she's still kinda in love with.
Alex never allowed herself to be put in a position where she could be broken; she never relied on anyone, she never trusted anyone, she never fell for anyone. She never opened herself up in that way. Apart from when it came to Piper. For some unknown reason that Alex couldn't comprehend no matter how long she pondered it, Piper opened her up in a way that could never be closed again. Piper somehow got into her veins, stronger than any drug you could ever imagine, and changed everything inside her. To put it bluntly, Piper made Alex feel things. Things she didn't think it was possible for her to feel. Attachment being the main one. Heartbreak being a close second.
Alex is transfixed; her eyes following every movement Piper makes as she weaves her way in between the tables scattered haphazardly around the room. She doesn't believe her own eyes for a moment, and almost laughs at herself for being so foolish. It isn't until Piper smiles at the guy taking her order that Alex's mind goes past numbness and dives head-first into a winding sea of manic turmoil; the same word circling round her brain like an echoing scream into darkness: fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. She doesn't know whether to try to get her attention or crawl further into the corner of the room and cry.
(Though the latter seems more appealing when she finally manages to tear her eyes away from the blonde and realises she hasn't arrived alone.)
Piper's accompanied by a guy who doesn't look anywhere near good enough for her. He's wearing a sweater that looks like it was made by his grandma for Christmas when he was 12 and Alex can't help but notice the way Piper doesn't look straight at him when he talks to her. At first, she isn't jealous, merely intrigued, but then Sweater Boy puts his hand on Piper's waist as he guides her towards a table and reaches over to hold her hand once they're sitting down and it feels like something inside of Alex explodes and ricochets throughout her chest and she doesn't know why it has such an impact on her but all she knows is that her whole body hurts.
It's like all the heat seeps from the room and nothing remains but cold emptiness when Piper smiles at him, and Alex swears she can hear her own heartbeat throbbing within her ribcage. Fucking hell. Even with her blonde hair cut short she still maintains an air of innocence, and she doesn't look a day older than she did the last time Alex saw her all those years ago, though at that point she was weighed down by fatigue and anger, her harsh departure making her so un-Piper that Alex begins to wonder if that's who she is now; if Piper Chapman became a woman who doesn't take shit from anybody and knows that she deserves the world and nothing less.
That train of thought is followed by one quite similar: Does Sweater Boy treat Piper well? Does he know her bottom lip trembles when she's angry and she's only ticklish on her neck? Does he know the story behind her tattoo? Does he know anything about her relationship with Alex? A part of her hopes he doesn't, she hopes that part of Piper's life can belong to her and that there's some things Piper only allowed her to know. But then again, she wants this guy to know about the adventures they had. She wants him to know she took Piper all over the world and made her cum in almost every country on the globe. She wants him to know that at the time it felt like it was Alex Vause and Piper Chapman vs the world. And she doesn't want him to ever forget it.
Alex can't believe how calm she's being, apart from the rumble of her thundering heartbeats and the way her lips begin to tremble when she stares for too long. She began to harbour even more hatred for Sweater Boy when he just so happened to pick a table directly in front of Alex's cosy little spot in the corner, though thankfully, Piper is facing away from her. It occurs to her how potentially dangerous her position is; if Piper was to turn her head ever so slightly to the left she'd be looking right into Alex's eyes, and though the idea of that doesn't sound half bad, she's worked pretty fucking hard to get over Piper. It's taken eight years to pick up the fragmented pieces of her past and happiness and rearrange them into some haphazard semblance of a normal, pain-free existence. She's proud of her work, even if sometimes she feels like the pieces are slipping.
Like right now, it's taking every ounce of her strength to not approach her. She wants to hear her laugh just one more time and have the chance to recognise the feel of Piper's skin beneath her fingertips, though she's sure she's memorized every inch of her body and kept it in the darkened crevices of her mind. She's just about to stand up when her hand accidentally hits the china coffee cup on her table and sends it flying onto the floor beside her, resulting in a loud smash that pierces the calming hum of conversation within the shop. Nice one Alex, here we fucking go. Get ready for the fireworks.
Everything moves in slow motion from then onwards; a waitress approaches her but doesn't seem to be getting any closer, a person at the table beside hers asks her if she's okay and she can feel the words travelling up her throat but can't roll them off her tongue, Sweater Boy stares at her with an amused expression painted on his irritating little face and, last but not least, Piper follows everyone else's movements and makes direct eye contact with her.
To say Piper looked like she'd seen a ghost would be an understatement, although it seems quite fitting, because she carries herself as if that's all Alex is to her anymore: a ghost of her past. Alex can't breathe. Like she literally feels like she's on the verge of a panic attack. Her brain is screaming a string of incoherent expletives at her, telling her to GET THE FUCK OUT NOW, JUST FUCKING RUN YOU IDIOT but she just can't bring herself to move. Her feet are glued to the dark wooden floorboards beneath her and her gaze is locked on Piper's face. She's mentally daring her to say something, anything, even if it's venomous words or a simple hello.
But she doesn't.
Instead, Piper Chapman does the thing Alex always imagined she'd do if this situation was to ever arise: she leaves.
Standing up without even a glance at the man she arrived with, she finally breaks the excruciating eye contact with Alex and walks right out the door. It isn't until then that Alex feels like there's air in the room again, and releases the breath she didn't realise she was holding for that long. The conversations around her continue, and it occurs to her that the world doesn't stop for anybody. So she takes her chance before Sweater Boy can take it for her, and she follows Piper out.
The rain has stopped, but something tells Alex a storm is just beginning as she finds Piper leaning against a wall just round the corner. She approaches her cautiously, like a predator stalking it's prey, and decides to dive straight in. Alex stands directly in front of Piper, forcing her to look up from the ground and reconnect the eye contact once again.
"Maybe this is a bad time to say hi, huh?"
Part 2 will be up as soon as it's written if enough people show interest in a continuation. I promise it gets better!
