A Day in the Life…
Warnings: Comedic bashing of both Dante and Vergil, randomness, fluffy animals (not Sesshoumaru), OOCness, mild swearing, mild swerving (actually, it's pretty severe swerving…), cameo appearance of the Easter Bunny (in disguise), literal interpretation, ellipses, copy-catting, threats (both serious and non-serious), did I mention randomness?
Author Note: We were trying to plan out another fic when this little…thing…popped out. It started as a demonstration of Vergil and Dante's personality differences and evolved into what you will soon read (and invariably end up in a mental institution for, most likely). I'd say don't ask where this came from, but I know, so I won't.
"…you know, you're so cold and distant all the time, I bet you wouldn't even care if some fluffy little animal were killed right in front of—"
"SWERVE! SWERVE, DAMMIT!"
"WHAT THE--? A RABBIT?! YOU ALMOST KILLED US FOR A RABBIT?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"
"…You have to ask? Aren't you supposed to be my twin?"
"I can't believe you said that…"
"…Why?"
"…Never mind. Forget it."
"No, I want to know. Why is what I said so odd?"
"It's just…you. You don't…never…argh, I said forget it!"
"Why should I?"
"Why shouldn't you?!"
"I want three good reasons."
"WHA-AAT? No! I refuse! This conversation is over, dammit!"
"It's not over until I say so."
"Like hell it is! Just because you're older doesn't mean—"
"SWERVE! SWERVE, DAMMIT!"
"WHAT THE--?! Dammit, Vergil! Are you trying to get us killed?! First a rabbit, now a stray cat, what next?! A rat?! I swear, you're going to be the death of me someday!"
"I highly doubt that."
"Oh, really? Well, you just look here and—"
"WATCH THE ROAD, DANTE!! Are you trying to get us killed?!"
"Oh, no you don't. Don't you go parroting my words back at me! I won't stand for this!"
"Good point. You'll sit, because even you can't drive standing up."
"…Vergil?"
"Yes, Dante?"
"…As soon as we get to the supermarket, I'm going to kill you."
Fin