Don't Speak
By Cedar1
A/N I absolutely love this song and everytime i hear it I always thing itd be perfect 4 a song fic,
so after sayin that 4 a million times finally did it last night, so here it is......hope u like it......
Disclaimer: Hermione and Draco (and co) belong to the rather genius JK Rowling and the song lyrics and inspiration to the fab No Doubt - italics and bold.
Warning: this is a PG13 however there is one strong swear word used, if this offends u please don't read this.
Don't Speak
The wind whipped up the excess material of her robe at the base of her feet, slid up the length of her legs, biting every area of exposed flesh. Goose pimples exploded on her skin as a reaction to the cold that touched her, but she couldn't feel anything, not a bit of it. In truth she had never felt so hot. The heat that was building up within her as he got closer was flooding her veins and burning her thoughts, all except those that included him. The way her breaths got shallower, or the manner by which her heart would start thumping in her chest or even the progression of her steady fingers into trembling digits of nervousness were nothing new. In fact it happened every day. It occurred every time he was near her, and so it would happen every day. For they were always together.
You and me
We used to be together
Every day together
It was strange how it all started. So strange that she, nor even he could pin point the exact moment when it had all began. Perhaps it was the endless nights of prefect duty they had had together - a proposal by Dumbledore to further the idea of interhouse unity, when they increasingly found themselves in conversation, anything to combat the boredom of walking down boundless empty corridors in silence. She sometimes argued it was before then. That their real feelings actually laced every bitter comment that had passed between them in the past.
"There's a fine line between love and hate," she would say to him. He would just laugh and say that it actually all began that night he slammed her against the wall and kissed her, all for the need to shut her incessant speech on houseelf rights. It angered her the way he did that - making fun of her beliefs like that, but he would just kiss his way out of it and she would immediately forgive his teasing. They were never, well they never used to be afraid of what people thought of them. Proudly they would walk into Potions hands clasped tightly in one anothers in front of everybody,remembering Snape's slack jaw that day still brought a smile to her face even now. They went as far as to snog each other passionately in the middle of the quidditch field following Slytherin's first win against Gryffindor in years. That had actually brought the crowd to silence quicker than Draco's spectacular grasp of the snitch from under the nose of Harry Potter. It's easy to smile about it now but she remembered crying at the end of that game after her two best friends had disowned her in front of all her peers in the common room. Nobody had reached out to comfort her that night. She was by herself now, they had made that clear. But they had forgotten that she had Draco, who lovingly took up the position that was vacated by all her friends.
He was never just a lover. He was her best friend.
I really feel I'm losing my best friend
And to think that it could all be over. She couldn't, it hurt too much.
I can't believe this could be the end
He was near enough that she could see the strong features of his face. His full lips were pulled into a thin line of determination, every so often they would part, letting out a puff of hot air into the cold surroundings. He was practising what he was going to say to her, the long fingers by his side moving in stuttered gestures. She tried to catch his eye, tried to get a glimpse of what he was thinking but he was avoiding her gaze. His grey eyes were fixed on the snow that was crunching beneath his heavy, expensive leather boots. In addition the fringe that he normally gelled back was falling freely in his face, yet another way to hide from her. She wasn't sure until now. The note that he had hastily shoved into her grasp before he had disappeared into the sea of students this morning had been her first clue. There were too many words used to plead her to come and meet him in the quidditch fields after dinner. Malfoys were normally so concise and blunt, the three paragraphs could have easily been phrased in one quick sentence unless it was so hard to write that he didn't know how to do it. And now seeing him practising, well it's damn fucking obvious now.
Well she didn't need it. She had been through enough for him and to just give up on them like this ...... well it was wrong and she wasn't going to stay. She rose from her seat,
taking her school bag with her and began to descend up the rows of benches so she could reach the stairs on the opposite side.
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know
However she hadn't realised that he had noticed her leaving and with all that aristocratic elegance had bounded his way up to her in seconds, quietly and quickly. She gasped when she felt his warm hand through the wool on her shoulder. Turning round she immediately placed a finger on his lips, instantly stopping him from saying what he had been preparing for for so long.
There was really no point. She knew what he was going to say and it hurt her to just think about it. For him to actually say it aloud, in his voice, she didn't know whether her battered heart would be able to withstand all that pain.
No, it was better this way. And by the way his eyes widened and the depths of grey were free from clouds of confusion she knew he understood.
Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
And perhaps in turn she understood him. There was no denying that they had had fun: kissing in the restricted area in the library after lights out, arguing about the acceptability of the dark cause (he would always be for Voldemort just to annoy her) and discussing the various properties the potions Snape had set for homework had. But it wasn't always that simple. There were times when she remembered exactly why she hated him and why they should never be together; when he was laughing at the first year who was crying as Blaise Zabini held his school books high above his head, the time when Neville had set fire to his robes and he had roared with laughter like all the other Slytherins.
Our memories
They can be inviting
But some are altogether
Mighty frightening
Maybe he was right It would never have lasted and yet even with this in mind she couldn't stop the tears that were rolling down her cheeks, and splashing onto the wood beneath them. So it had ended, and her body weakened with the conclusion of their relationship. She moved her finger from his mouth and collapsed onto the closest solid object, the bench next to her. She wanted to stop being so weak, wanted to show him that she too knew why it should end. But the tears just kept on coming and she could do nothing but hide her shame and pain in her hands, allowing her tears to wet her fleshy palms instead of her robes.
As we die, both you and I
With my head in my hands
I sit and cry
The bench creaked as he sat down next to her and she tried to resist his force as he tilted her head with his hands so she was now facing him. He was opening his mouth again, no doubt to say he was sorry but it was all for the best. She was about to silence him again like she had done so before when he kissed her. It started of softly, gently caressing each other with their lips and their tongues. But then hands went to hair and waists, and things got more forceful.
They were pushing against each other, tasting each other till there was nothing left to taste. It was so sweet, however at the same time salty as their tears ran down to their mouths and into the kiss.
Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
It was when that salty taste was getting stronger and stronger that Hermione knew they had to end it. It wasn't right for them to cry while they kissed. They couldn't be happy and sad at the same time. They were too opposites that were never meant to be together. And ironically perhaps they too were like that. A pureblood with a mudblood it wasn't supposed to be,
especially not a pureblood whose surname was Malfoy and a mudblood who had been best friends with Harry Potter. Who were they kidding? They were just a couple of school kids acting on teenage hormones. They couldn't change reality or the problems that would face them once they had graduated and were out in the big, bad world, away from the relatively safe and enclosed environment of Hogwarts. They were living a fairy tale.
Its all ending.
I gotta stop pretending who we are....
She pushed him away and a look of hurt flashed through his eyes.
"Go," she said, her voice clear and loud echoing in the night air. A small part of her wished he would say no and say that he was wrong and that he wanted to be with her forever. But instead he got up and began walking down the stairs, back the way he came.
You and me I can see us dying......
He never loved her. He would have stayed if he had truly loved her. Wouldn't he?
She turned her back to him and was just about to commence her way up the stretch of benches that looked even longer than before when she allowed herself one last look.
Whipping round she was surprised to find herself looking directly into his eyes. Even with the distance that parted them the feelings that radiated from the depth of his eyes penetrated straight through her, hitting her directly in the heart.
.....are we?
00000000000000000000000
Looking at her with her brown curls flying about her, framing her beautiful face with her eyes shining wet from all the tears he knew exactly what she was going to say. It was that same look she had had when she had said it the last time, after the first and last time they had made love. "I love you." Well he loved her and that's why he was running, drowning her voice with the sound of his shoes slapping the ground and the air whooshing past his ears. He didn't want to hear it. It had been hard enough as it was breaking up with her. The threats his father were making could no longer be ignored. He had to do it.
Breaking up with someone always hurt but it destroyed you when it was someone who loved you and it was someone you loved just as much.
And so he ran even faster.
Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me 'cause it hurts
A/N a wee bit melodramatic I know but what the hey.
So please review if u've read till here Pretty please.
Please please with sugar on top.
Pretty please with sugar on top and a cherry for added goodness!
Ta!
Luv Cedar1