A/N: This is just a wacky fic brought about by a phone conversation that I had with my friend, Monique. No end to this in sight as of yet, but that doesn't mean there isn't one. Be warned there is slight OOCness (out of character) from some characters, mostly our strongest fighters because Monique likes to torture them so. So on with the fic.

Disclaimer: Must you remind me? I don't own Rurouni Kenshin. However, this doesn't mean we can't "play" with them for a few quick chuckles, ne?

This story is dedicated to Kasumi-chan - a.k.a. ChowaChocho-chan, the wind beneath my wings.

Prologue

The Evil Plot

A cackling shadowed figure stood over a vile filled with green bubbling liquid.

"It's complete!" a high-pitched voice triumphantly screamed over the creation. "It's finally complete!"

"What is it?" a curious and slightly skeptical voice came from behind.

"Tea." stated the first simply as she lifted the string out of the vile to reveal the soaked herbal bag dripping it's last bit of flavor.

"I hate you, Sakana. I really, trully, no-sedative-included hate you."

"Now, now, Mizu. Blood pressure," the evil scientist reminded.

A blood vessel could be seen breaking the surface of Mizu's forehead, but she quickly calmed herself. This is okay. This is all okay. As long as she doesn't try to take over the world again, I'll be okay.

"Anyhoo," she continued. "I've got this really nifty plan to take over Japan."

Mizu visibly twitched, a look of doom on her face. "What?"

"Yeah," Sakana beamed. "After my brilliant, although failed, world takeover plan with the Rabid Snapping Turtles of Doom(r) my therapist, no vision whatsoever, suggested I aim for smaller goals in life."

Ah yes. Mizu remembered the snapping turtles of doom. In particular a fiesty amphibious hellion by the name of Jaws. Her hand involuntarily rubbed a soar spot on her bum. She had favored sitting on her left side ever since. . .

Sakana, raising a skeptical eyebrow to her assistant who seemed to her to be experiencing constipation, snapped Mizu out of her painful reverie asking "Tell me, Mizu, what does every Meiji Era Japanese home have?"

Mizu thought seriously for a moment before perking up and stating smartly "A grudge for Battousai!"

(WHACK!)

"OW! What?" Mizu complained after Sakana equally smartly thwacked her on the head with a poetry book. She never did like that Haiku stuff. . .

"Koi ponds, you idiot! Koi ponds!" Sakana straightened herself up and put the book down to begin her vivid explanation that Mizu was sure she wasn't going to like. The evil scientist became animated as she grabbed the vile next to her "tea."

"All we have to do is sneak into the koi food factory in Kyoto and sneak this into the formula. It will transform all plump peaceful koi into psychotic bloodthirsty carnivours. Therefore rendering everybody in this country helpless as I take control. Grand idea, yes? Mwahahaha!"

Mizu grabbed the tender flesh of her "upper-thigh area". Oh no you don't, she swore to herself, not this time. She had to somehow stop Sakana and her obvious obsession with snapping water critters.

That night, Mizu switched the "psycho koi" vile with an unkown one. Anything had to be better than carnivorous koi. However, she found herself at a rather difficult junction. How to get rid of it?

"Mizu! Did you get the vile yet?" Sakana yelled from the front door, impatiently tapping her foot. "Taking over the wor- I mean . . uh, taking over Japan won't wait!"

Mizu had always been a simple girl.

"Be right there!" she yelled back.

She chucked the vile out the window. Problem solved. Or so it seemed. . .

-

A/N: Yes, yes. I'm fully aware that the Kenshin-gumi have not made their appearance yet, but please have patience with me and read on. I know my original characters aren't much, although I find myself strangely attached to Sakana (the psychotic little troublemaker). Please review! If you don't I'll send the entire third squadron of rabid snapping turtles of doom lead by Jaws himself! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Japanese terms:

Battousai - Kenshin's nickname during the war when he was a manslayer.

Haiku - Japanese poetry.

Sakana - Translated means "fish" (aren't I original?)

Mizu - Translated means "water" (yup. thought so.)