Happily ever after
Parody-of-an-Angel
Summary: You said that you would always be there to catch me when I fell, but when I was falling the hardest and fastest, you let me.
Just a little drabble I found in my notebook, I wrote it about a year or two ago so don't expect it to be very good and certainly not very long. I wrote it with Hermione and Draco in mind. I might do one from his point of view, but I'm not sure yet.
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The steady drip of the tap reminds me of rain, which in turn reminds me of you. I always associated you with rain, at times so gentle and soft, but at others powerful and often frightening. I remember that we would stand outside when it rained, with our faces tilted upwards towards the sky, catching the cool drops on our faces.
The first time I told you that I loved you was on a day like that. You had just kissed me and I thought it was the perfect moment for it. You didn't say you loved me, you never did, but I always ignored it, thinking that you just weren't ready. Whenever I said that I loved you, you would simply smile and say 'I know'. Did you ever love me? I was convinced that you did deep down at the time, but now when I look back I can see that you didn't and that you never had.
I remember when my parents died. I was devastated and shut myself off from the entire world. No one could get through to me, but then you came. You dried my tears and saved me with your soothing words and loving embraces.
You saved me.
Only to destroy me.
"I'll always be here to catch you when you fall". You promised me that and like the naive little girl I was, I believed you.
You said that you would always be with me, that we would always be together, but all the time you were lying. It was no wonder I couldn't tell though. They were perfect, your lies, just like you.
I had always prided myself on knowing things and I thought that I had known you. But you shattered that illusion into a million tiny fragments. It was the perfect fairytale relationship, but it ended before I got my happily ever after. I used to be able to read fairytales and smile, but now they make me cry. I loved all the great romances, like Helen and Paris of Troy, who sacrificed everything for love and the tale of the goddess of death and her mortal lover who overcame all boundaries for their love to survive. Secretly, I had always hoped for a love like that, that someone would come and sweep me off my feet. I wanted a white knight in shining armour, but instead I got you, the dark knight. In the beginning you posed as the white knight, with your blonde hair and pale skin, but your eyes weren't the right colour. They weren't bright blue or emerald green, but a dark, stormy grey.
I saw you yesterday in the streets, but you didn't notice me. Or maybe you did, but you just didn't care. You were with a girl, with your arms wrapped around her like you used to hold me, smiling at her in the same way. I had thought that I was the only one who could make you smile like that, but obviously I wasn't. I was just an amusement, something to pass the time with before you eventually threw me away like a rag doll. I wonder if it's the same with this girl and I think it is.
I couldn't face you after that, after you threw me away, I couldn't face anybody. So I ran. I ran away from your cold indifference and my friend's pity. I ran away from their worried glances and their glares at your back. But most of all I ran away from myself. I needed to escape; I didn't want to acknowledge that I had been wrong about you. Because I was never wrong. I knew all the answers and made all the right decisions. But this time I hadn't and I hated you for that most of all. You blinded me with your perfect lies to the extent from which I couldn't tell truth and lie apart anymore. I couldn't see you for what you really were, but everyone else could. They tried to warn me, but I didn't listen, so blinded was I. You made me believe you were the white knight, but it was all an elaborate act to cover your darkness.
Yesterday was the first time I had seen you in seven years. I decided that I was tired of running and so I simply stopped.
In those years you've probably all but forgotten me, but I'll always remember you. I don't want to forget though, because I never want to be blinded again. I don't want to repeat what happened, but I wouldn't change it either. So I won't forget, not now, not ever.
I used to believe in happily ever after, but you changed that. You said that you would always be there to catch me when I fell, but when I was falling the hardest and fastest…
…you let me.