This particular one-shot has been floating around in my head ever since I finished reading 'THG' and I haven't been able to write anything else until this was finished, checked and uploaded onto Fanfiction. So without further ado, I give you this.
Disclaimer: I would really like to give Finnick and Annie a happy ending together, but I'm not Suzanne Collins.
Only In My Dreams
I'm lounging around upon what feels like a downy cloud of plush pillows and velvety duvet covers, the warm rays of the sun saturating the partially exposed skin of my back and shoulders. I push myself up into a sitting position whilst smoothing my fingers out against the soft linen sheets of the mattress, blinking frequently as my eyes adjust to the dazzling white of my bedroom.
Sunlight filters in through the haze of silk silvery curtains; a gentle breeze blows into the room carrying the scents of sea salt and summer flowers, causing them to billow softly. I inhale deeply, rubbing my eyes as I wander over to the window to stare out at the glorious sapphire blue sea that is the pride and joy of District 4.
The sun sits high up in a brilliant cerulean sky with not a single cloud to be seen as far as the horizon whilst mild waves gently climb the sandy gold beaches with a soothing shoosh. Then suddenly there's movement from down the hallway and I wander towards it curiously, stopping outside the open door of the nursery.
Inside Finn sleeps peacefully on his back, his gentle snores echoing across the room. The curtains here are closed, warding off the bright sunlight as he slumbers. I pad across the wooden flooring, which is cool to my feet, and peer over the crib at my beautiful baby boy, finding comfort in his slow, steady breaths.
My little Finn already shares so many features with his father, from his unruly bronze hair to the long lashes that brush his tan cheeks. Behind those eyelids hide a pair of brilliant green eyes that shine exactly like his father's. I brush my fingers across his cheek, cooing to him softly.
A pair of warm calloused hands briefly graze my shoulders before running lightly down my arms and sides, halting when they finally reach my hips.
His hot breath blows across the back of my neck, causing my spine to tremble involuntarily. This is followed by a low throaty chuckle as only he has this effect on me and he knows it.
"Hey Annie." Finnick whispers into my ear and although his face is obscured from my view I can feel him smiling against my skin as he plants a trail of kisses down the side of my neck and along my shoulder.
Instinctively I stretch up onto my toes, humming contentedly whilst relishing in the burning sensation of his lips on my body.
"Morning." I sigh, my hands automatically intertwining with his.
Finnick draws my right hand to his lips and pecks the ring that sits on my wedding finger. "Afternoon you mean."
"Afternoon?" I stammer, manoeuvring out of his grasp to glance outside at the bright blue sky again where the sun sits lazily a little off to the west. "Why didn't you wake me?"
"You looked so peaceful, lying there. Like an angel. I didn't have it in me to disturb you." He murmurs softly spinning me around so that he can meet my gaze. His sparkling green eyes swirl with an assortment of varying emotions and for a brief moment I'm lost in them.
"Annie? Annie?" He questions, effectively pulling me out of my reverie. "It's ok honey. You're not there anymore. You're here with me. Be with me." He thinks I'm there. That for a brief moment I'm lost in the games but I can never be lost when he's around. I accept his comforting embrace though, resting my head on his chest whilst listening to the sound of his beating heart.
"I am." I answer. "I wish you had woken me up, you know I hate sleeping in. You practically miss half of the day."
Finnick flashes his trademark grin. "Well you're lucky that I've already done all of your chores for you. All you have to do is relax."
I tilt my head back and see his happy eyes staring down at me lovingly, the sunlight behind him a halo around his messy bronze hair. "Always the ever-charming Finnick O'Dair." I tease.
He smiles pressing his lips to me again. Kissing Finnick is like being underwater; you feel light and disoriented but the weightlessness sends a pleasant thrill through your bones and no matter how much you want to stay under you have to keep coming back up for air.
"Only for you now Annie. I'm only myself around you." He breathes.
"I know." I smile, taking hold of his handsome face in my hands, kissing him lightly on his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, his chin, his nose before finally capturing his lips again. "I love you." I whisper, my hands now running through his beautiful bronze hair. He smiles and mimics me by saying "I know" when Finn begins to stir in his crib just a few steps away.
Finnick pulls away, knowing that I need to hold our beloved son in my arms. I cradle him tenderly against me, shushing him back to sleep. Finnick hovers behind me, resting his hands on my hips and swaying with me as we both watch over our perfect little boy. He rests his chin on my shoulder "I love you Annie. You and our son." He murmurs softly, filling me with warmth.
In this moment, the three of us standing in this little room nothing could be more perfect. The man I love and our healthy baby boy who looks so much like his father its uncanny. My family. Nothing could make me happier...
A rumble of thunder rouses me from my sleep. Fierce gales cause the windows to tremble vigorously and beyond that I can hear the roar of the waves as they crash against the shore alongside an onslaught of torrential rain.
Desperately clinging onto the remainder of my dream, I clench my eyes, but reality is drawing nearer and I don't want to face it. My arms stretch across the width of my bed, the vacant space beside me causing my heart to wrench in excruciating pain. I manoeuvre myself into a sitting position, glancing around the room frantically; a small part of me still foolishly latching onto the dream. Only Finnick isn't here to comfort me.
A muffled cry escapes out of my mouth as the harshness of reality catches up with me and I have no choice but to accept the truth. That Finnick is dead. That he died in the war, fighting against Capitol.
With trembling fingers I grip the sheets of the bed with both hands and begin to cry. The room is dark and oppressive, the walls closing in on me as shadows engulf me in the darkness, and all of a sudden I'm drowning. Drowning in my own sorrow and despair, struggling to keep my head above my tears. My hands instinctively cover my ears and I'm there again. Back in the games. Swimming for survival. Swimming, swimming, swimming. Trying to keep myself from drowning only this time I don't have Finnick to help me. He left me to end Snow's reign of terror and lost his life in doing so.
More tears stream down my face as my sobs become louder and more strangled than before. A second boom of thunder resonates in the air, triggering a series of child-like cries from somewhere nearby.
My head snaps up, the terrified screams effectively pulling me out from my nightmarish thoughts. My baby. Mine and Finnick's beautiful baby boy. He's still here. He's scared. He needs me.
With the palms of my hand, I rub at my eyes before rushing hastily into the small bedroom furthest down the hallway, prying the door wide open in my haste.
He lies in his crib, bawling his little eyes out, arms flailing and something about it reminds of how I behaved when Finnick died.
The first time his death had been announced dead, when the Capitol blew up the block that Finnick, Katniss, Gale and a few other rebels took shelter in, I knew that somehow he was still alive. All around me the families and friends of our beloved star squad were morning what they thought were their lost loved ones but I knew Finnick wasn't actually dead. I could feel it.
However not long after their survival had been confirmed, something in me snapped and I felt lost and plunged deep down into a pool of hysteria. Johanna had tried to console me, saying Finnick that wasn't dead, that the Capitol would have announced it. But I knew better. He had left this world for a better one. And half an hour later a propo from the Capitol confirmed it.
It was weeks later that I discovered that Finnick hadn't left me entirely despite no longer being by my side. My pregnancy was something of a shock to everyone and only made the tragedy of Finnick's death even more heartrending for them. Only for me, it was my salvation from my depressed state. Some part of Finnick would continue to live in the form of our child and in spite of the worrisome prospect of having to raise our child alone; I at least had something to start living for. And with Johanna's help I've been slowly improving, with only the occasional relapse into my previous state. I'm the happiest I've ever been since Finnick's death and it's all because of Finn. My son who in my eyes couldn't be any more perfect. My pride and joy.
I lift his wailing figure from his crib and murmur to him softly, holding him tightly to my chest as I catch sight of the weather that woke my little angel.
Outside District 4 is being savaged by a storm. Blustery winds whip across the surface of a turbulent sea. Surges of powerful rippling waves throw themselves up along the coastline, the impact of water colliding with earth creating magnificent jets of water that disperse into the air, further soaking the ground below. Up in the skies, large unwavering black clouds with vibrant streaks of cobalt and violet overshadow the entire district, unleashing torrents of rain and hail onto the ground, drenching everything that's out of the sea's reach. A flash of lightning lights up the room and is followed by another roll of thunder, which roars above the whistle of the wind and the pattering of rain.
Finn cries become more panicked and I whisper in his ear softly, telling him stories from my childhood about the sky and the sea; two lovers whose frustration at being forever separated and being unable to meet each other could cause the most terrifying of storms. But memories of their love for each other would often calm their thoughts and soothe them once more.
In a way the story reminded me of how I and Finnick are now. The games hadn't given us any choice in our separation since if you were unlucky enough to be reaped you're only hope was a volunteer and even they were rare amongst reapings in 4. But Finnick chose to leave me. He chose to fight this time and whilst I still mourn his death and leaving me and Finn alone, there's still some part of me, who I was before the games, that can't help but be proud of him. At what he's helped to achieve and even though we're separated for now, me down here in District 4 amongst the sea with its lack of stability and bouts of wild emotions and Finnick up in the heavens unable to reach but watching over us, I know that one day we will be reunited. But not now. I hope to spend many years with my son before I can join his father in the sky. And then we can watch the world together like always. Just me and him.
So, what did you think? There are so many HG fanfics out there and I know that mine will never meet the standards of some people's but I needed to get this out of my head. I also have a lot of other HG-related ideas that could possibly make an appearance but I won't know if there's any point in posting them if I don't know what people think of my writing. So if you liked it, lemme know with a review.
Lefthandedpeoplerule ;)