A/N: This has been my favourite fic to write, period. I hope you all like it just as much as I do! It's only a Dameron one-shot i'm afraid, there's no more chapters and no sequel, it's finished!
It's set in an AU where Damian and Cameron are best friends in High School
There is only one person that I like, that person just so happens to be a guy and my best friend.
"Cam, wait up!" Damian yelled from somewhere behind the blonde haired boy, Cameron looked behind him and saw Damian running towards him.
Damian caught up to Cameron, a big smile on his face, Cameron feigned a smile back at him—a smile which was so fake yet utterly believable to the clueless Irish boy next to him.
"Wanna go grab somethin' to eat round my house? You have time, right?" Damian asked, Cameron bit his lip and nodded as his eyes stared longingly into Damian's, wishing everything in his power that he could be his.
I love him; I love him so much that it hurts sometimes.
Damian started walking and Cameron followed hesitantly, he looked at the back of Damian and his eyes trailed over every inch of the boy he loved. His heart felt heavy and it hurt as it pounded harder and harder in his chest. His vision grew cloudy as his eyes watered and he had to hold back a sob as he watched Damian walk in front of him—so near yet so very far away.
But it's forever a one sided love.
Cameron wasn't sure how it ended up this way but they decided to watch a movie which lasted 3 hours long, Damian insisted that he should stay over because it was way too late to walk home, after Cameron had checked with his parents whether it was alright or not to stay he finally gave in and Damian smiled as he set up a spare bed in his room.
Cameron's eyes never left Damian's figure, he watched as Damian set up the bed, as Damian turned around to smile reassuringly at him, as Damian left the room to change clothes. Cameron sighed—why did he have to feel these things, why couldn't he fall in love with a girl at least then things would be simpler. After Cameron changed into his pyjamas Damian returned and settled down in his own bed, he turned to face Cameron on his bed and smiled friendly at him.
"I'm gonna turn the lights off, is that okay?" Damian asked.
"Yeah, it's fine" Cameron murmured into his pillow, he couldn't face Damian—there was no way he'd be able to look at his face and not give it away that he was irrevocably in love with him.
"If you get cold just let me know and I can get you more blankets, this room gets chilly at night" Damian remarked, even his low voice sent chills down Cameron's spine, he was way past a silly crush—he was completely fucked, there was no way out of this one, he was seriously in love with his best friend.
Damian turned out the lights and both boys's settled to go to sleep, after about half an hour of nervously trying to get to sleep Cameron finally found himself drifting off. That was until he heard Damian's voice loud and clear.
"Cameron?" Cameron's eyes flew open and he kept his breathing to a minimum—even though his breath was shaking like crazy, he didn't dare to turn round; instead he pretended he was still asleep. "I like you" Damian whispered, Cameron couldn't prevent the loud choke-inflicted cough he released from his mouth as he turned his head around sharply to catch Damian's eyes in the dark. He had the expression of complete shock on his face.
"What?" Cameron asked, his voice border line hysterical, Damian simply laughed at the shock in Cameron's voice.
"I mean—I like how close we are as friends, the fact that we're able to be like this and the fact that I have so much fun with you. I want us to be friends for a really long time." Damian finished, Cameron's heart sunk.
Oh, right, of course.
"Being in Glee Club together and everyth—" Damian cut himself off as he drifted back to sleep, he was always a heavy sleeper.
There's no way we could be friends, ever, not even for a second.
I didn't even notice it was love, at first. We got along so well—we just clicked instantly, I can't kid myself that it was always just because we were great friends. I started to become conscious of everything he did, the way he talked with his accent, the way he laughed, the way his eyes shined so bright. I was always in love with him, right from the start.
But he's a guy, and so am I. He dates girls—he likes girls. And eventually, he'll get a girlfriend. No matter how much I adore him, how close I get to him I'll forever remain merely a 'friend' to him. I'm the one that's wrong. Even though I know that all I want is to be close to him, for him to love me back, for this not to be unrequited love.
"Damian" without realising it Cameron stretched his arm out, completely overrun by his passion for his friend, he leaned forward to place his hand over Damian's awkwardly placed one. Cameron looked at him through determined, passion-filled eyes which were so close to watering. His voice wavered and it sounded like he was about to cry.
"I still love you" He whispered. "I love you" He said again before he retracted a hand and rolled over to face away from Damian, shaking at what he had just admitted—even though Damian was asleep.
Even as our future continues you'll probably never find out. I know we can never be more than 'just friends'.
As Cameron fell fast asleep he didn't notice Damian shift slightly in his sleep, he didn't see Damian cover his mouth with his hand to hide any shocked sound he might make, he didn't see Damian's eyes open wide with complete disbelief at the confession he just made. He had no clue that Damian had been awake the whole time.
The next day at school Cameron acted as normal as possible despite what he had said the previous night—at least Damian didn't hear him so it wasn't all bad. He met up with Hannah as Damian had football practice early that morning, he woke up and Damian had left him a note saying he had gone to practice and that Cameron should go on without him.
"So how was your day yesterday?" Hannah asked the blonde boy, Cameron smiled at her and shrugged.
"It was alright" He said coolly "Me and Damo just watched some movies" He remarked, she grinned and her eyes wandered to behind Cameron, her grin widened.
"Speak of the devil! Is football practice over already?" She asked, Cameron's heart started to pound hard as he looked behind him to meet the distracted eyes of Damian. Damian returned his stare for about two seconds before looking away sharply, his eyes glinted with something that Cameron couldn't name—he had never seen that look in Damian's eyes before.
"Hey, you didn't answer her question" Cameron stated, waving his hand in front of Damian's eyes, Damian blinked then looked away from Cameron and towards Hannah.
"Sorry, Hannah, yeah—we gettin' lunch now?" He asked her, he completely blanked Cameron and followed Hannah to their usual spot on the field.
"Come on, Cam" Hannah yelled and gestured for Cameron to follow. Cameron swallowed nervously and followed the two to the field.
What's up with him?
"So coach says I might be the new quarterback if I keep playin' at this rate" Damian told Hannah excitedly, Hannah grinned at the Irish boy.
"Wow, that's great!" She exclaimed.
"Yeah and tomorrow we have practice so—" Cameron sighed, he really wasn't interested in football it was pretty boring to him. He carried on drinking the soda in his hand and he looked up to meet the piercingly blue eyes of Damian, he looked at the Irish boy in shock and his heart beat increased. Damian was tracing his features with his eyes, staring at him intensely that Cameron found it extremely unsettling.
"What?" Cameron asked Damian, Damian looked away sharply back to Hannah.
"Uh—so that's my chance to show her what I'm made of!" Damian continued, he avoided Cameron's eyes with everything he had. Something switched off within Cameron—he felt rage build up in his stomach that he just had to release, he leaned forward and grabbed Damian's shirt pulling him close threateningly. Damian was taken aback and looked at Cameron with shocked eyes.
"Why are you ignoring me? Tell me, Damian!" Cameron shouted at the shocked brunette, his face was twisted in an angry expression and his fist had tightened into a ball—ready to punch him. Hannah was shouting at both of them to stop it and to calm down.
"If you have something to say then say it!" Cameron spat at Damian. Damian pushed Cameron away and stood up, he brushed his shirt down. Cameron fell onto the floor; his hands flew out to soften his fall.
"I've gotta go" Damian muttered, he left quickly without another look at his two friends. Hannah turned to Cameron.
"Cam, are you alright? You're bleeding" She said, she took his hands in her own and inspected them. Cameron stared after Damian. Cameron snatched his hands back from the red head.
"It's only a scrape, I'm okay." He muttered. Hannah stared off after Damian.
"Did something happen with you two?" She asked.
"No, nothing I can think of" Cameron replied solemnly, he stared back down at his hands and bit his lip.
"But Damian wouldn't do that without a reason to, maybe you should ask him about it?" She suggested, Cameron feigned a smile and nodded.
"Yeah I think I'll do just that" Cameron replied. He looked at the direction Damian left in once more and he stood up, the wind blew through his hair as he stared off into the distance.
I wonder if he heard me, the other day.
Three days later Cameron found Damian standing with a bunch of jocks who the Irish boy played football with.
"Damian" Cameron said clearly, Damian's eyes wandered briefly to the boy standing in front of him then he shot his eyes back to his teammates and smiled care-free.
"Wanna go to practice?" He asked them, they all murmured their agreement and Damian walked past Cameron without another glance. Cameron found Hannah suddenly next to him, she watched with him as Damian walked away.
"It didn't work again? It's been three days, it's pretty obvious that he's avoiding you" Hannah stated, Cameron nodded in agreement. "Do you know why? You can tell me, y'know?" Hannah remarked, Cameron shook his hands in front of her.
"No! Everything's okay, don't worry about it! I'm pretty sure that I'm to blame" Cameron's eyes fell to the ground and he tightened his fists into balls determinedly. "I'll fix this" He stated.
It's because I let it slip that I—that's why he…
A week passed and Damian still acted oddly around Cameron that was when Cameron finally had enough, he needed to speak to Damian as soon as he could which is why he found himself running after the Irish boy as soon as he spotted him leaving class.
"Damian" Cameron yelled causing the boy in question to stop. "I need to talk to you" He stated. Damian bit his lip.
"I have football practice, I need to go" The Irish boy said with a nervous voice, Cameron shook his head and reached out to grab Damian's arm—preventing him from moving any further.
"Wait, I won't take long, just please listen" Cameron practically begged the brunette to stay; Damian agreed and dragged Cameron to a secluded room so that they were out of ear-shot from passersby.
"So, what did'ya wanna talk about?" Damian asked the blonde boy.
"The other night, when I was round your house—you, you heard what I said didn't you" Cameron asked, Damian's eyes grew large and he averted his gaze to the ground.
"Ah—I…" Damian trailed off.
"I thought so. Look, Damo, it didn't mean any—"
"I'm sorry" Damian interrupted; Cameron looked at him as if he were crazy. "I really was asleep before that but I just woke up for no reason, I'm just sorry okay" Damian babbled, he looked guilty and he scratched awkwardly at his neck.
"You're taking it the wrong way" Cameron said solemnly, his gaze focused on the floor and he couldn't quite meet Damian's eyes.
I was wrong; I didn't mean to say it anyway.
"You said that you liked me as a friend, that's what I meant as well." Cameron said, his voice was low and hardly contained any emotion; Damian simply stared at him quietly.
No matter how much I adore you I can't do anything about it, at least this is better than nothing.
"Oh…so we're still friends, right?" Damian asked with hopefulness in his voice, Cameron managed to give him a small smile.
"Of course" Cameron replied, Damian grinned so suddenly at him that Cameron was unsure of how to respond to it.
"So I'll see you tomorrow then?" Damian asked, Cameron nodded and turned around so that he wasn't facing the Irish boy anymore.
"Yeah, sure" Cameron replied, Damian left shortly after and Cameron let the tears fall hard and heavy from his eyes.
This is how it's supposed to be, just friends.
Now we can laugh together like before, we can have fun like before, talk for hours like before, when something happens we can help each other; it's all I can hope for. Even though I want to be touched a little differently, or I want you to call my name with a completely different voice, I want you to set your eyes on me differently. It's wrong to think that way, I know that.
A week later
Cameron, Hannah and Damian were all sitting in Damian's room just talking aimlessly as they always did. Suddenly Hannah's phone started vibrating; she looked sheepishly at both boy's and answered it.
"Linds, what's up? Does it have to be today? Seriously, tomorrow? Okay I'll be over soon" She looked guiltily at Cameron and Damian as she put her phone back in her pocket. "Apparently I have an assignment due for tomorrow and I had completely no idea! Luckily Linds remembered, I'm gonna have to bail for dinner tonight, I'm sorry!" She apologised, Damian cheerfully waved it off.
"Don't worry about it! I'm sure me and Cameron can finish dinner between the two of us!" He stated as he looked over to Cameron. Hannah left shortly and Damian eyed Cameron once more.
"You might as well stay over tonight, it's getting' late anyway" Damian suggested, Cameron didn't know why but he gave in once more—it had been two weeks since the incident happened and Cameron was sure that it would not happen again, he was determined in the fact that they were just friends and they would forever be just friends.
"Can I turn off the lights now?" Damian asked, much like he did two weeks ago. Cameron finished off the text he was currently sending to Hannah and placed his phone to the side.
"Yeah, I'm okay with that" He told the Irish boy, who clicked the lights off as soon as he received a response from Cameron.
"I have football practice early tomorrow so I'll probably have left before you wake up, so get some food before you leave for school okay?" Damian asked, Cameron grunted in response and wrapped his arms around himself. "G'night" Damian said softly.
We're back to normal again, that's a good thing, right? It's better than rejection. I need to give up on these feelings; I can't keep kidding myself that he might be feeling more than friendship for me.
"Cam? You're not asleep are you" Cameron's eyes opened to Damian's clear voice, he shut his eyes tightly willing Damian to just shut up and sleep. He heard Damian sit up in his bed, his eyes were still shut. "D'ya wanna come over here?" Damian asked nervously, Cameron's heartbeat sped up, his face flushed red and his mind was racing with the possibilities of that sentence.
"You're awake, aren't you?" Damian said once more, nervous at the fact that Cameron wasn't replying.
"What are you talking about?" Cameron muttered, still not facing Damian's direction. He heard Damian gulp before he spoke.
"I was thinkin' about before, do you really think of us as just friends?" Damian asked. After he gained no response from Cameron he sighed and carried on. "I—I can't think of you as just a friend anymore. For two weeks it's all I've been thinkin' about and I just can't" Damian edged himself towards the side of the bed and reached out a hand to place on Cameron's back. Cameron's eyes were unbelievably wide—this couldn't be happening.
"That time—you told me you loved me and you sounded like you were about to cry" Damian said, his voice full of determination. "Until then I did honestly think of you like a friend, when we became friends I thought you'd be an awesome guy to hang around with, that we'd get along great but maybe that wasn't the friendship I was lookin' for. When you told me you loved me I was surprised, I'm not gonna lie but I was also very happy as soon as I heard it. After that I avoided you because I kept noticing you in a different way, I don't see us as friends anymore." Damian became quiet as he finished, he had now sat fully up on his bed—his legs dangling over the side as he faced Cameron who was still turned away from him.
Cameron sat up and looked at Damian in the darkness in completely disbelief.
"But you said you were sorry, that time when I confronted you—you said we were friends" Cameron sounded hysterical but he really couldn't care less, he didn't believe Damian one little bit—not after everything which had happened, he honestly felt like crying.
It's a lie, I won't believe it.
"What's with you all of a sudden anyway? You're just confused, think before you talk okay" Cameron snapped at the Irish boy, Damian simply stared at him through the darkness.
It was always a one-sided love, I tried so many times but all in vain, I need to give up. Stop confusing me.
"I don't even consider you as a friend" Cameron shouted at the Irish boy, he winced as he realised what he had just said. Everything was quiet for a moment, Cameron's chest was heaving from his outburst and Damian still stared at him.
"I said I was sorry for overhearing, not for what you said." Damian said quietly. "It's too late for you to say we're only friends or you don't love me or shit like that. I wouldn't be able to believe you even if I tried. After you said it like you really meant it, I couldn't even if I wanted to" Damian stated. Cameron's heart felt close to bursting as he tried to distinguish features on Damian's dark face.
"Cameron" Cameron's eyes grew wider and his chest pounded as he stared up at Damian. "If you think of me as more than a friend, please come here." Damian remarked simply, Cameron bit his lip.
He shouldn't say it in a voice like that.
"Cameron"
If you talk to me like that I—
Damian looked up at the face of Cameron who had now stood before him; he smiled lovingly at the boy in front of him and held out his arms for Cameron to fall into. Cameron's face twisted into an embarrassed, sad, extremely disbelieving yet ecstatic expression.
"Cameron"
Even if it's a mistake, even if it's just him being confused.
Damian grabbed Cameron's hand carefully and pulled him slowly down onto the bed with him.
I've wanted you forever. Each time I've told myself that it's impossible and even knowing that it's impossible for me to have you…there is no way I can give you up.
Damian pulled Cameron into a tight hug; Cameron wrapped his arms around Damian's neck and rested his head on the brunettes shoulder.
"Cameron" Damian repeated, Cameron could feel his cool breath on his cheek as he pushed Cameron down onto the bed sheets; he hovered over Cameron and bit his lip.
"We don't have to" Cameron stated, seeing the hesitance in Damian's eyes, Damian shook his head, he pressed his lips firmly to Cameron's for the first times and the vibrations made from the Irish boy's lips were almost unbearable. Damian pulled away.
"How much have you thought of this happening?" Damian asked, Cameron blushed furiously and averted his eyes from Damian's.
"I'm not telling you" He said, embarrassed, Damian grinned and crashed his lips onto Cameron's once more.
I've imagined things like this over and over again. Your hands, your lips, your fingers, they'd touch me with deeper meaning. Even though I told myself that it would never happen, I've always expected, desired and envisioned that this very hand would eventually pull me closer to you. Even if I was wrong—even so I would have been happy like this.
Damian parted their lips once more, a visible trail of spit was the only thing connecting their mouths now, they both locked eyes as they gasped for breath, Cameron's cheeks were tinted red from the heated kiss and he looked so perfect underneath the brunette.
"Cameron, are you sure about this?" Damian asked, extremely hesitant as to whether they should go through with this or not. "We won't be able to go back" He reminded the blonde haired boy.
"Where can we go back to?" Cameron asked Damian, his eyes filled with determination and love. "It never existed in the first place, don't you see? There wasn't a time where we were friends" Cameron said helplessly. Damian smiled warmly at the boy underneath him, he was right after all.
From the beginning, until now.
Damian removed Cameron's shirt promptly, discarding it quickly on the floor as he pulled his own shirt off, Cameron trailed his hands down the Irish boy's chest lovingly and their eyes caught each other's once more. Damian leant down and connected their lips together once more; he moved his lips passionately against Cameron's as Cameron returned it with just as much enthusiasm. Their hips grinded together earning gasps from both boys'.
Damian pulled away and he started to undo Cameron's belt—his eyes never leaving the blonde boy's. Cameron arched his back to give Damian more access to pull his trousers down, once both his trousers and boxers were discarded Damian's eyes fell on Cameron's completely naked body. He trailed his gaze everywhere appreciatively—never seeing Cameron this beautiful before. Cameron's hands attacked Damian's belt as well and Damian helped to discard his trousers so that both boys were completely naked.
Damian wanted to waste no time; he sucked at his fingers—moistening them up and slipping them easily into Cameron. Cameron winced slightly at the pain; it wasn't until Damian hit that little nub when Cameron moaned in pleasure, his body writhed from under Damian and Damian couldn't help but groan in response to the sight of it. He lined his length with Cameron's hold and pushed himself slowly in, Cameron winced once more and gritted his teeth at the size of it. However once Damian had started moving he was beginning to enjoy it.
"Cam-ron" Damian moaned, he leaned forward to place a soft kiss on Cameron's hair as he continued to thrust in and out of the boy. He trailed his lips down so that they met Cameron's ones. Both boy's moved their lips gently against each others in a soothing manner. Once both had reached their climax, they were panting and Cameron grabbed at Damian's bare back.
"We're not friends anymore" Damian whispered roughly into Cameron's ear. "I love you too" Damian added, Cameron couldn't help the tears which were escaping his eyes. He simply grabbed harder at Damian's back, wanting to fill the empty space which had been evident for so many years.
"Damian" Cameron said breathlessly. He closed his eyes and soon fell asleep with nothing but good thoughts in his head.
I didn't think any of this were possible, now that it is I want you, only you. No-one else can ever make me feel this way.
Cameron awoke to a hand caressing his hair lightly. He turned his head around to face the direction the hand was coming from.
He ended up nose to nose with Damian, Damian's arm was around his shoulders and lightly playing with his hair while his other arm was holding his own tightly under the sheets, they were both still naked from the previous night.
"G'mornin'" Damian stated sleepily, Cameron became fully awake and aware of the position the both of them were in. Cameron sat up straight and looked at the time.
"I thought you were going to football practice?" He inquired, Damian shrugged and looked at him sheepishly.
"I skipped" He said simply. "Did you think I'd just leave you here?" Damian asked with a laugh, Cameron smiled fondly at him and settled back into bed. "You don't mind being late to class do you?" Damian asked Cameron once more.
"Why?" Cameron asked, he sat up again finally aware that it was time for school, Damian also sat up and hugged him from behind, his arms wrapping affectionately around Cameron's waist. Cameron turned his head to look at the Irish boy.
"I want to redo my mistakes, from the time we've been friends, the time we've met 'til now. I want to make things right" Damian whispered into Cameron's ear.
I always thought I was wrong for thinking and hoping that he would end up feeling the same way.
"Let's fix this" Damian stated. Cameron smiled and pulled him close—their noses touching once more.
I wasn't wrong, I was so very right, this is right. I was the one who was stupid in thinking that we could only ever be friends.