Disclaimer: This all belongs to BBC…I'm just playing with them as usual.
No money is made. This is tjust a way to stay awake at night.
Notes: Again…it is a Fifth Doctor story. Takes place at the end of Enlightenment.
The Doctor ran along the corridors of the aging and rapidly disappearing ship. Turlough was hard at his heels, his ridiculous school-boy coat flapping behind him as he ran. Tegan followed behind the two men, her heels clacking on the hard wood floors.
Tegan rounded a corner, colliding with the Doctor as he stood contemplating direction. Her mouth opened to urge him to run, she could feel the nothingness of space against her back, pressing at her mind, but he seemed to understand the need to run without her urging and he took off yelling for them to follow. He was running harder and she could see nothing but his blond hair and fluttering frock coat as he rounded yet another corner. Of all the times to be lost, she thought.
"The Eternals?!" Turlough half-yelled, half panted.
"Gone back to the wastes of eternity," the Doctor shouted over his shoulder. "Hurry now…we don't have long…"
He stopped and opened a door, rocketing down the stairs three at a time. Turlough grabbed hold of both railings and swung down the stairwell. Tegan tried to follow, reaching to grab hold of the railing itself, but found it disappear under her hands. With a swallowed scream, she threw herself down the last of stairs, and she felt the Doctor's hand grabbing at hers. "Come ALONG, Tegan," he shouted.
She saw Turlough head down a corridor to another stairwell.
"The TARDIS?" she yelled.
The Doctor didn't answer, looping his arm around her waist and half- carrying, half-throwing her down the stairs. When she reached the bottom and had her heels under her again, she turned to look behind them to see…
Nothing but stars and space.
"Hell's Teeth," she breathed, and then she had her hand grabbed again.
"Run!"
Turlough was waiting at the bottom of the stairs next to a very familiar, very welcome looking blue Police box. She nearly shouted in relief, instead, she moaned out: "So that's where you had left it."
The Doctor tossed Turlough the key and flew down the remaining steps. Tegan was whipped around behind him, pulled by her hand. There was some scuttering at the door as the schoolboy fumbled with the key and then he fell inward through the open door. Tegan was ushered in rather harshly and the Doctor ran in behind her, palming the door switch, the dematerialization switch and the coordinates all at one time.
She leaned over the console, panting, swearing as the rotor failed to move. She could feel when the last of the self induced gravity disappeared, leaving the TARDIS floating in the dead of space. "Doc!"
"Don't panic," the Doctor yelled back and punched the console. It began to rise and fall steadily. He grabbed the ledge with one hand and wiped his face with the other. Turlough was leaning over the console on the other side and smiled as he saw and heard the familiar dematerialization of the time machine.
"Well…that's over," the Doctor offered in a good-natured tone. "Thank goodness."
Tegan lowered her head and took several deep breaths. She always hated the last minute dashes for the TARDIS as the world around her fell apart. It had happened on several occasions, she thought, and she was no nearer to finding it commonplace. "Do you think we could have a fine stroll to the TARDIS one of these days instead of a 500 yard dash?" she asked, sarcastically.
"If you wore more sensible shoes, Tegan," Turlough offered quietly, but harshly. "The run would be a little less stressful."
"And if you hadn't been so subversive, I might not have had to make that dash to begin with. I never trusted you, Turlough…and it seems that I was right. You were after the Doctor the whole time, weren't you?"
"I was tricked by the Black Guardian," Turlough gave back, leaning into the console, gripping it harshly. "I only wanted to leave Earth: I didn't want it bad enough to kill, however, Tegan. You have to believe that."
"I'll believe that when I see pigs fly," Tegan answered, her voice getting low and gritty. "How can we be sure that you won't try and kill the Doctor now?"
"Tegan," the Doctor urged, tiredly raising his head where he had let it rest as he listened to them. "Let it go. I trust him."
"But…"
"He has rather proven himself, Tegan. He used Enlightenment as it was meant to be used: for personal growth and fulfillment…to release plagues of character and soul."
She crossed her arms over her chest and glanced away from the Doctor as he busied himself setting coordinates. Turlough straightened his jacket with a subdued look and excused himself through the interior door and his room. Tegan watched him go with narrowed eyes. "No matter what you say, Doc, I don't trust him…I don't think I ever will."
"And that is your choice, Tegan," he answered tiredly. "But I do trust him. We will have to agree to disagree on this point, I think."
She huffed and reached out to play with the viewscreen knobs. They were silent as the Doctor rubbed at his jaw and mumbled, setting the coordinates for Turlough's mysterious home planet. All he had been given were the galactic placement of the planet, not the name. After a time, he sighed, nodded, and pleased it seemed. The squeak of his shoes was loud as he made for the interior room. Tegan's uncharacteristically quiet voice stopped him.
"Wait, Doc…can I talk to you for a moment?"
"If it is about Turlough, Tegan, I have no desire to continue to beat a dead horse of a conversation. The argument, as far as I am concerned, is quite over."
"No…I mean…it isn't about him," she stated, looking down at the console. She played with the edge of the silver plate and avoided his eyes. "It's about that ship…those Eternals…"
"Ah…" Tegan heard him stop, turn and slip his hands in his pockets. "I see. All right. What do you want to talk about?"
"Not here?" she prodded, suddenly full of energy. She strode to the door and held it open. "Can we talk in the cloister room?"
The Doctor stared at her, but answered quickly. "Of course, if that is what you need. Is there a problem, Tegan?" He had known her long enough to know that when she was angered or upset physical activity…either a walk, run or just increased fidgeting helped her to alleviate the emotion.
"I'm fine. Indestructible." She held the door open until the Doctor walked through it and out into the corridor. He joined her and they walked, somewhat quietly, to the cloister room. When they entered the large column and ivy filled room, she turned quickly. "Why?"
The Doctor frowned and strolled forward into the center of the room. "Why? Why what? Did I miss part of the conversation?"
"No," she shook her head. Then with a voice that betrayed some of her anger, she turned to him to talk. "Why me? Why did they…well…attach to my mind the way that they did? Why did they say the things they did about me?"
He rolled his shoulders with a sigh and reached up to remove a vine that was climbing down a column. "Why you? I suppose it was because you do have a spark, a fire about you, Tegan. I can sense what they were drawn to, somewhat. You are strong willed to the point of aggression and do have a love of life…your own and others. Interesting as well. That was all that they were drawn to, Tegan."
"But why does every person we find or bump into lately want to possess my mind? It's like a party in there and I wasn't invited," she rubbed at her forehead. Her demand was met with a quiet answer of the Doctor's:
"Are you in need of anything?" he asked, concerned. "Does your head ache?"
"No more than usual," she answered. "Our travels leave me with a perceptual headache."
"You are your old self," he concluded, leaning back to turn. He faced the center of the room and squinted into the misty, ivy depths. He was louder as he inquired: "Is that all you wanted to ask?"
"Yes…I mean…I wanted to say something else too," she answered, crossing her arms over her chest. He waved his hands to get her to continue. She lowered her gaze to the floor and bit her lip. The Doctor was intent on her, hoping that she would continue soon. Fisticuffs and situations with the Guardians always left him feeling weak and worn out…left him feeling every year of his 800. He wanted nothing more than to retire to the conservatory or the thought room, as Tegan had coined the inducement room, and relax.
"Well? What is it?" he asked, pressing.
Tegan lifted her eyes from the floor and looked past him, to the wall, to the door. "I thought you died…that you were dead…I thought you and Turlough had been thrown overboard. We saw two bodies in space…I thought it was you two. I was…"
The Doctor bent at his waist to address her. "The TARDIS would have worked for you, Tegan. It would have gotten you home, I promise. There was no worry; you would have been quite all right."
She shook her head; her voice tinged with anger and some sadness. "That wasn't the point, Doctor."
He recoiled slightly, and to her, seemed shocked. "What was the point, then? I would have supposed that getting home would have been your top worry."
"You don't get it," she sighed exasperated. She trained her eyes on him to see genuine confusion in his face. "It wasn't getting home that bothered me. Truly. Your death did. It hurt terribly."
The Doctor lifted an eyebrow and stood to his full height, tucking his chin a little. She continued, seeing what she thought was rejection of her feelings: "Look…I'm not usually one that makes friends in passing, Doc. When I make friends, it means I make friends. Has caused quite a bit of pain in my life, but it seems part of my make-up that I just can't toss. When I thought you died…it pained me."
With a sigh, the Doctor slowly slid his hands into his pockets and stared at her. "Tegan."
She held up her hands quickly, training her gaze to the side again. "I mean you were somewhere where I couldn't help you…"
"If we had been thrown overboard, Tegan, and you had been there, you would have been thrown over as well," he pointed out logically. "We all would have been dead."
"Leave it to you to be logical," she groused. She rolled her eyes. "And I don't even know what I am trying to say here…never mind. Let's just get back to rights." Tegan worried at her lip with her teeth and began to walk past him to the corridor.
The Doctor reached out and stopped her as she passed him. She turned quickly, startled and somewhat angry. Tegan Jovanka had always been a woman who knew how to handle her emotions…by shouting them out to the world, or by just showing anger. No matter how well she handled all the others, she had a great deal of trouble handling fear. And fear was what was at the core of what she felt when she had seen the bodies in space. Fear of missing a friend she had come to rely upon and for whom she cared. Tegan wanted to hide the fear until it dulled.
As she stopped, the Doctor lowered his hand from her arm; it appeared he didn't know why he had stopped her. He offered a half smile. "Thank you."
Tegan met his eyes for a second before she started to talk, rambling. "I mean…look…I just wanted you to know…that you would have been missed…that…"
He nodded. "I know what you are trying to say and again…thank you." He lowered his eyes to stare at the floor. "It is good to know I'll be missed."
She agreed with a clipped nod. "You would….be missed that is."
The Doctor bit his lip. "Mariner, I suppose, was rather intrigued by the emotional reaction, wasn't he?"
"Quite."
"Mmm," the Doctor commented. "That does not surprise me."
Tegan growled: "Horrible creature."
With a sigh, he rolled his shoulders. "They didn't have motive to hurt us, Tegan. They looked elsewhere for existence…"
She didn't want to hear the finer points of Eternals and she shook her head. "No, Doc…leave me unaffected anger for a little while, please?"
He nodded quickly and then nodded toward the door at her back. "Do you want to return to your room, Tegan? I dare say you will need rest after that little foray of ours."
Tegan nodded. She bit her lip again and turned to walk out the door, but stopped. The Doctor, walking behind her, reeled, surprised at her sudden stop. Without a word, she turned, catching him unaware and slipped her arms around his waist. Awkwardly, she gave him a hug. He lowered his arms to return the quick embrace. "I'm glad you are okay, Doctor."
Then with a glance that didn't say anything about her emotions or her actions, she released him and turned to the door again. Her steps were quick as she disappeared through the door and the Doctor allowed her the distance, remaining behind in the cloisters. When her footsteps could not be heard anymore, he sighed and walked, slowly away into the TARDIS.
Notes: Again…it is a Fifth Doctor story. Takes place at the end of Enlightenment.
The Doctor ran along the corridors of the aging and rapidly disappearing ship. Turlough was hard at his heels, his ridiculous school-boy coat flapping behind him as he ran. Tegan followed behind the two men, her heels clacking on the hard wood floors.
Tegan rounded a corner, colliding with the Doctor as he stood contemplating direction. Her mouth opened to urge him to run, she could feel the nothingness of space against her back, pressing at her mind, but he seemed to understand the need to run without her urging and he took off yelling for them to follow. He was running harder and she could see nothing but his blond hair and fluttering frock coat as he rounded yet another corner. Of all the times to be lost, she thought.
"The Eternals?!" Turlough half-yelled, half panted.
"Gone back to the wastes of eternity," the Doctor shouted over his shoulder. "Hurry now…we don't have long…"
He stopped and opened a door, rocketing down the stairs three at a time. Turlough grabbed hold of both railings and swung down the stairwell. Tegan tried to follow, reaching to grab hold of the railing itself, but found it disappear under her hands. With a swallowed scream, she threw herself down the last of stairs, and she felt the Doctor's hand grabbing at hers. "Come ALONG, Tegan," he shouted.
She saw Turlough head down a corridor to another stairwell.
"The TARDIS?" she yelled.
The Doctor didn't answer, looping his arm around her waist and half- carrying, half-throwing her down the stairs. When she reached the bottom and had her heels under her again, she turned to look behind them to see…
Nothing but stars and space.
"Hell's Teeth," she breathed, and then she had her hand grabbed again.
"Run!"
Turlough was waiting at the bottom of the stairs next to a very familiar, very welcome looking blue Police box. She nearly shouted in relief, instead, she moaned out: "So that's where you had left it."
The Doctor tossed Turlough the key and flew down the remaining steps. Tegan was whipped around behind him, pulled by her hand. There was some scuttering at the door as the schoolboy fumbled with the key and then he fell inward through the open door. Tegan was ushered in rather harshly and the Doctor ran in behind her, palming the door switch, the dematerialization switch and the coordinates all at one time.
She leaned over the console, panting, swearing as the rotor failed to move. She could feel when the last of the self induced gravity disappeared, leaving the TARDIS floating in the dead of space. "Doc!"
"Don't panic," the Doctor yelled back and punched the console. It began to rise and fall steadily. He grabbed the ledge with one hand and wiped his face with the other. Turlough was leaning over the console on the other side and smiled as he saw and heard the familiar dematerialization of the time machine.
"Well…that's over," the Doctor offered in a good-natured tone. "Thank goodness."
Tegan lowered her head and took several deep breaths. She always hated the last minute dashes for the TARDIS as the world around her fell apart. It had happened on several occasions, she thought, and she was no nearer to finding it commonplace. "Do you think we could have a fine stroll to the TARDIS one of these days instead of a 500 yard dash?" she asked, sarcastically.
"If you wore more sensible shoes, Tegan," Turlough offered quietly, but harshly. "The run would be a little less stressful."
"And if you hadn't been so subversive, I might not have had to make that dash to begin with. I never trusted you, Turlough…and it seems that I was right. You were after the Doctor the whole time, weren't you?"
"I was tricked by the Black Guardian," Turlough gave back, leaning into the console, gripping it harshly. "I only wanted to leave Earth: I didn't want it bad enough to kill, however, Tegan. You have to believe that."
"I'll believe that when I see pigs fly," Tegan answered, her voice getting low and gritty. "How can we be sure that you won't try and kill the Doctor now?"
"Tegan," the Doctor urged, tiredly raising his head where he had let it rest as he listened to them. "Let it go. I trust him."
"But…"
"He has rather proven himself, Tegan. He used Enlightenment as it was meant to be used: for personal growth and fulfillment…to release plagues of character and soul."
She crossed her arms over her chest and glanced away from the Doctor as he busied himself setting coordinates. Turlough straightened his jacket with a subdued look and excused himself through the interior door and his room. Tegan watched him go with narrowed eyes. "No matter what you say, Doc, I don't trust him…I don't think I ever will."
"And that is your choice, Tegan," he answered tiredly. "But I do trust him. We will have to agree to disagree on this point, I think."
She huffed and reached out to play with the viewscreen knobs. They were silent as the Doctor rubbed at his jaw and mumbled, setting the coordinates for Turlough's mysterious home planet. All he had been given were the galactic placement of the planet, not the name. After a time, he sighed, nodded, and pleased it seemed. The squeak of his shoes was loud as he made for the interior room. Tegan's uncharacteristically quiet voice stopped him.
"Wait, Doc…can I talk to you for a moment?"
"If it is about Turlough, Tegan, I have no desire to continue to beat a dead horse of a conversation. The argument, as far as I am concerned, is quite over."
"No…I mean…it isn't about him," she stated, looking down at the console. She played with the edge of the silver plate and avoided his eyes. "It's about that ship…those Eternals…"
"Ah…" Tegan heard him stop, turn and slip his hands in his pockets. "I see. All right. What do you want to talk about?"
"Not here?" she prodded, suddenly full of energy. She strode to the door and held it open. "Can we talk in the cloister room?"
The Doctor stared at her, but answered quickly. "Of course, if that is what you need. Is there a problem, Tegan?" He had known her long enough to know that when she was angered or upset physical activity…either a walk, run or just increased fidgeting helped her to alleviate the emotion.
"I'm fine. Indestructible." She held the door open until the Doctor walked through it and out into the corridor. He joined her and they walked, somewhat quietly, to the cloister room. When they entered the large column and ivy filled room, she turned quickly. "Why?"
The Doctor frowned and strolled forward into the center of the room. "Why? Why what? Did I miss part of the conversation?"
"No," she shook her head. Then with a voice that betrayed some of her anger, she turned to him to talk. "Why me? Why did they…well…attach to my mind the way that they did? Why did they say the things they did about me?"
He rolled his shoulders with a sigh and reached up to remove a vine that was climbing down a column. "Why you? I suppose it was because you do have a spark, a fire about you, Tegan. I can sense what they were drawn to, somewhat. You are strong willed to the point of aggression and do have a love of life…your own and others. Interesting as well. That was all that they were drawn to, Tegan."
"But why does every person we find or bump into lately want to possess my mind? It's like a party in there and I wasn't invited," she rubbed at her forehead. Her demand was met with a quiet answer of the Doctor's:
"Are you in need of anything?" he asked, concerned. "Does your head ache?"
"No more than usual," she answered. "Our travels leave me with a perceptual headache."
"You are your old self," he concluded, leaning back to turn. He faced the center of the room and squinted into the misty, ivy depths. He was louder as he inquired: "Is that all you wanted to ask?"
"Yes…I mean…I wanted to say something else too," she answered, crossing her arms over her chest. He waved his hands to get her to continue. She lowered her gaze to the floor and bit her lip. The Doctor was intent on her, hoping that she would continue soon. Fisticuffs and situations with the Guardians always left him feeling weak and worn out…left him feeling every year of his 800. He wanted nothing more than to retire to the conservatory or the thought room, as Tegan had coined the inducement room, and relax.
"Well? What is it?" he asked, pressing.
Tegan lifted her eyes from the floor and looked past him, to the wall, to the door. "I thought you died…that you were dead…I thought you and Turlough had been thrown overboard. We saw two bodies in space…I thought it was you two. I was…"
The Doctor bent at his waist to address her. "The TARDIS would have worked for you, Tegan. It would have gotten you home, I promise. There was no worry; you would have been quite all right."
She shook her head; her voice tinged with anger and some sadness. "That wasn't the point, Doctor."
He recoiled slightly, and to her, seemed shocked. "What was the point, then? I would have supposed that getting home would have been your top worry."
"You don't get it," she sighed exasperated. She trained her eyes on him to see genuine confusion in his face. "It wasn't getting home that bothered me. Truly. Your death did. It hurt terribly."
The Doctor lifted an eyebrow and stood to his full height, tucking his chin a little. She continued, seeing what she thought was rejection of her feelings: "Look…I'm not usually one that makes friends in passing, Doc. When I make friends, it means I make friends. Has caused quite a bit of pain in my life, but it seems part of my make-up that I just can't toss. When I thought you died…it pained me."
With a sigh, the Doctor slowly slid his hands into his pockets and stared at her. "Tegan."
She held up her hands quickly, training her gaze to the side again. "I mean you were somewhere where I couldn't help you…"
"If we had been thrown overboard, Tegan, and you had been there, you would have been thrown over as well," he pointed out logically. "We all would have been dead."
"Leave it to you to be logical," she groused. She rolled her eyes. "And I don't even know what I am trying to say here…never mind. Let's just get back to rights." Tegan worried at her lip with her teeth and began to walk past him to the corridor.
The Doctor reached out and stopped her as she passed him. She turned quickly, startled and somewhat angry. Tegan Jovanka had always been a woman who knew how to handle her emotions…by shouting them out to the world, or by just showing anger. No matter how well she handled all the others, she had a great deal of trouble handling fear. And fear was what was at the core of what she felt when she had seen the bodies in space. Fear of missing a friend she had come to rely upon and for whom she cared. Tegan wanted to hide the fear until it dulled.
As she stopped, the Doctor lowered his hand from her arm; it appeared he didn't know why he had stopped her. He offered a half smile. "Thank you."
Tegan met his eyes for a second before she started to talk, rambling. "I mean…look…I just wanted you to know…that you would have been missed…that…"
He nodded. "I know what you are trying to say and again…thank you." He lowered his eyes to stare at the floor. "It is good to know I'll be missed."
She agreed with a clipped nod. "You would….be missed that is."
The Doctor bit his lip. "Mariner, I suppose, was rather intrigued by the emotional reaction, wasn't he?"
"Quite."
"Mmm," the Doctor commented. "That does not surprise me."
Tegan growled: "Horrible creature."
With a sigh, he rolled his shoulders. "They didn't have motive to hurt us, Tegan. They looked elsewhere for existence…"
She didn't want to hear the finer points of Eternals and she shook her head. "No, Doc…leave me unaffected anger for a little while, please?"
He nodded quickly and then nodded toward the door at her back. "Do you want to return to your room, Tegan? I dare say you will need rest after that little foray of ours."
Tegan nodded. She bit her lip again and turned to walk out the door, but stopped. The Doctor, walking behind her, reeled, surprised at her sudden stop. Without a word, she turned, catching him unaware and slipped her arms around his waist. Awkwardly, she gave him a hug. He lowered his arms to return the quick embrace. "I'm glad you are okay, Doctor."
Then with a glance that didn't say anything about her emotions or her actions, she released him and turned to the door again. Her steps were quick as she disappeared through the door and the Doctor allowed her the distance, remaining behind in the cloisters. When her footsteps could not be heard anymore, he sighed and walked, slowly away into the TARDIS.