In the dark of the Taxi Syed ran his hand slowly up the inside of Christian's thigh, feeling the hot breath on his ear as Christian whispered.

"Home soon."

The yellow for hire sign disappeared out of view into the frosty night air and they stood huddled together in front of the blue door.

"Hurry up Sy, It's freezing, I need warming up."

Syed put his hand into one pocket of his jeans and pulled out a bus ticket, he tried the others, then his jacket. He searched frantically through them all again and then said.

"Um."

Christian looked at him in disbelief.

"By 'um' please don't tell me you mean you've lost the keys?"

Syed bit his lower lip.

"That might be the case. Haven't you got yours?" he asked in a desperate last ditch attempt to shift the blame.

Christian shook his head sadly.

"Sy, Sy. I asked you if I needed to bring mine and you said no. In fact your exact words were, and I quote 'You'll get pissed and leave them on a wall with our address attached and a note saying please feel free to steal all our things and murder us in our beds.' Unquote."

Syed's voice sounded very small as it echoed quietly around the deserted square.

"Are you sure it was me and not my evil twin brother?"

"I've met him, and right now I think he's way hotter and not dim enough to lose his keys."

Syed looked across to the row of houses, curtains all drawn with no lights showing.

"I don't suppose we could wake up Jane?" he suggested.

Christian tutted.

"At three in the morning? Ian will put the rent up by £1000 pounds a week. I'll just have to barge the doors down."

He walked away for a few paces and prepared to take a run up. Syed grabbed his arm to stop him.

"If you do that Ian will make us pay over the odds to mend it, he'll get money out of us one way or another. And what if you hurt yourself and can't work?. The small top window around the side is unlocked. We could try and get in there."

Christian considered their options for a moment.

"I might be able to jump across from the flat roof. Here, take this."

He began to unzip his coat.

"Please don't Christian, you're not Spiderman, plus you've been drinking. What if you slip? " Syed pointed out anxiously.

"You'll catch me."

Syed grimaced.

"Me break your fall? They'll have to peel me off the pavement like a cartoon. I'll shin up the drainpipe. You'd never get those shoulders through the gap anyway."

He placed one foot in Christian's cupped hands and hoisted himself up, grabbing onto the rusting black metal. Little trickles of mortar ran down the brickwork alarmingly and he could sense Christian hovering nervously below. He managed to prise up the window latch and forced the top half of his body into the flat.

Christian gave a few claps of pride and shouted,

"My hero!"

Syed wriggled, trying to calm a small rising panic.

"Shh. Keep your voice down, someone might call the police."

"Men in uniform, fine by me. Not as good as the view I've got right now though."

"Stop perving at me."

Syed muttered, muffled by the blind battering into his face.

"I'd be doing more than that right now if you hadn't lost the keys."

Christian pointed out, gazing up at Syed's flailing legs.

"My belt's stuck."

Christian started to laugh.

"Take it off then."

Syed tried to prop himself with one hand on the window ledge, realising he could no longer move either forwards or backwards.

"But my trousers will fall down!"

Christian began rocking with mirth, clutching at his sides. Leaning back against the wall to steady himself he felt, with a twinge of guilt, something sharp digging into his leg through the lining of his coat.

Syed managed to manoeuvre one hand back through the opening to undo the buckle. He felt his jeans slipping and kicked wildly to push them over his boots, hearing the flap of fabric as Christian caught them. With a final effort he flopped onto the dining table, knocking the bowl of oranges flying.

He lay prone and panting on his back, lifting his head slightly at the sound of footsteps on the stairs and the click of the lock.

Light flooded into the flat, Christian stood silhouetted in the doorway, a glint of silver from the keys dangling in his hand.

"Um."

He looked at Syed, lying dishevelled and flushed across the table and a wicked glint flashed in his eyes. Syed propped himself up by his elbows and murmured softly,

"I'll give you 'um'. Come here. I think your evil twin owes me an apology."