SNL with a little bit of Friday the 13th and Blair Witch Project and Also featuring Star Wars and the Wizard of Oz

A. K. A Garth's Amazing Adventure

(Setting: Wayne's World Set)

Wayne and Garth:"Wayne's World! Wayne's World! Party Time! Excellent! Wooo - ooo - ooo- ooo!"

Wayne :"Excellent!"

Wayne: "It's time for Wayne's World. With me as always is Garth!"

Garth: "Party on Wayne!"

Wayne: "Party on Garth!"

Wayne: "With us today is our excellent guest Jason!"

Wayne and Garth: "Jason! Jason! Party Time! Excellent! Woo - oo - ooo - ooo!"

(Jason enters wearing a mask and carrying a chainsaw)

Wayne: "Well Jason? I hear you're into killing people! Excellent! So what have you brought for us today?"

(Jason breathes heavily and snarls a little)

Wayne: "Excellent!"

(Suddenly out of the audience jumps Mary Katherine Gallagher!)

Mary: "How come he gets to be on the show for killing people? I'm a real SUPERSTAR!"

Wayne: "Mam! You'll have to take your seat we're in the middle of a show here."

(As Wayne is saying this Jason saws Mary's head off and her body falls on Garth's feet)

Garth: "Wayne! I kinda got a dead person on my feet here and she's like, bleeding all over my shoes!"

(Jason breathes heavily and sits next to Garth)

Garth: "Wayne, dude, Jason is gonna kill me!"

Wayne: "No way Garth! Jason has signed a form promising he won't kill us. Besides He's only faking!"

(Jason breathes even heavier and slices both Wayne's arms off. In no time at all Wayne dies from blood loss.)

Garth: "Everybody run!"

(Garth runs away with Jason on his tail. Garth runs four miles not stopping until he finds himself in a dark forest.)

Garth: "Where am I?"

(Suddenly a luminous Church Lady appears.)

Church Lady: "Just like hell isn't it?"

(She floats beside Garth as he walks through the forest.)

Garth: "Hey! You look kinda like me!"

Church Lady: "That's not important! All that's important is that Satan worshiper is close behind you."

Garth: "What am I going to do?"

Church Lady: "You can beat him! Just release the Church Lady within!"

Garth: "Thanks dude!"

Church Lady: "Well, isn't that special."

(Church Lady Disappears)

Garth: "Yeah I can beat him!"

(Garth stops and turns around. He sees Jason running toward him.)

Garth (whispering to himself): "Release the Church Lady within. Release the Church Lady within."

(Jason is getting closer every second)

Garth: "Carrying a chainsaw and killing people, who pays you to do this stuff? Satan?"

(Jason growls at Garth)

Garth: "Oooo, vicious are we? Well , isn't that special."

(Jason revs up his chainsaw and runs in for the kill)

(Garth moves a foot in the neck of time and Jason runs in to a tree)

Garth: "Now that we've learned that doing the work of the devil doesn't pay we need to teach you a lesson."

(Garth throws Jason into a bear cave)

(Church Lady appears again)

Church Lady: "Good work!"

Garth: "You still haven't told me why I look like you?"

Church Lady: "It's because you are me, but that's still not important. What's important is getting the hell out of here!"

Garth: "How will I do that?"

Church Lady: "You got rid of that son of Satan didn't you? I'm sure you'll figure something out."

(Church Lady disappears again)

Garth: "Dammit!"

(Garth walks through the woods trying to find a way back.)

Garth: "What did she mean by because you are me?"

(As Garth is thinking a noise escapes from the thickets. Garth turns his head toward that direction and Sensitive Naked Guy Appears)

Garth: "What are you doing here? This is my story!"

Sensitive Naked Guy: "Some guy dragged me here and beat me!"

Garth: "Put some clothes on!"

Sensitive Naked Guy: "What does that have to do with the guy who dragged me here and beat me?"

Garth: "Maybe he did it because you need to put some clothes on ,dude?"

Sensitive Naked Guy: "Will you help me get back home?"

Garth: "No!"

Sensitive Naked Guy: "Why?"

Garth: "Because you need to put some clothes on."

(Garth walks away leaving Sensitive Naked Guy behind. As Garth walks he takes his drum sticks out of his pocket and starts to fake play drums. While he is doing this he hears an irritating voice coming from not too far away.)

Garth: "Who are you?!"

Voice: "I am Craig Buchanan, the Liberation Party Witch!"

Garth: "Excellent!"

Craig: "Now are you down with the Spartan Spirit?"

Garth: "The what?"

Craig: "Big mistake! I haunt ,like, these woods and since you're not down with the Spartan Spirit I'm gonna have to kill you!"

Garth: "Not too excellent!"

Craig: "I'll give you a ten minute running start . . . now!"

(Garth runs as far as he can away from the Liberation Party Witch. He reaches a darker part of the forest.)

Garth: "Woah!"

(He hears a rustling in the bushes and quickly turns his head to see what the noise is. With all of Garth's great luck that day it turned out to be the Liberation Party Witch.)

Craig: "What have we here?"

Garth: "How'd you get here so fast?"

Craig: "What?"

Garth: "I mean since I had a ten minute running start and I took the quickest path here because I ran straight that means that it's not possible for you to get here that fast."

Craig: "Does it make a difference now that I found you?"

Garth: "Apparently not."

Craig: "Exactly!"

Garth: "Release the Church Lady within. Release the Church Lady within."

(Garth rams at Craig Buchanan with the full power of his head. Craig Buchanan is injured and rests on the floor.)

Craig: "This isn't over yet!"

Garth: "Later Dude! Much!"

(Garth walks through the dark woods until he reaches a cave that appears to be empty. He walks in to find a small creature with large ears and big eyes.)

Garth: "Who are you?"

Creature: "I am Yoda! Have you come to learn how to be a Jedi?"

Garth: "No, I'm lost and could you, like, help me find my way home?"

Yoda: "Just follow the yellow brick road!"

Garth: "Are you sure you're not a munchkin from the land of OZ or something?"

Yoda: "You dare question Yoda?"

Garth: "No, dude, I'm sorry! I'll follow any color road you want!"

Yoda: "Follow and you shall find your way home. Now go! I have to make green tea."

Garth: "Okay dude! Bye!"

Yoda: "Goodbye my son!"

(Garth travels on. Finally he reaches an amazing castle.)

Garth: "If this is home then I'm the king of Italy!"

(Two dwarfs came up to Garth.)

Dwarf 1: "We welcome you, your majesty."

Dwarf 2: "Welcome back!"

Garth: "You mean I live here?"

(Both Dwarfs nod their heads.)

Garth: "Excellent!"

(Garth follows the Dwarfs into the castle where he is made king. Of his many accomplishments were world peace, the return of Death Leopard and the remix versions of songs by such groups as Metallica and Aerosmith. Garth lives happily ever after until the ghost of Wayne returns, but that's another story!)