Why is this so hard?
All I ever wanted was to be with Sasuke, and become a better Konichi.
When did it all go wrong? I always thought it was when Naruto was put on our team, I mean I never really thought much of him, he was just some annoying boy, he had a crush on me and he wasn't very skilled, and I thought that right till our first big mission, till he came up with the plan the freed Kakashi-sensei, That was the first time I noticed him
The next time wasn't till the Chunin exams, when Sasuke wanted to back down, Naruto charged forward, proving he would never give up no matter what, even in the face of impossible odds. But all I could really worry about was Sasuke, after all I love him, and he needed me, at least that's what I told myself.
He was the one who helped me beat Ino, not Sasuke but I don't' think I really saw it that way, and the way he won against Kiba... every day Naruto kept showing how much he was improving, growing stronger and moving away from the Dobe we knew.
I didn't see much of him or Sasuke in following month, I trained, tried to get stronger, hoping I would catch up to them, but then I saw Naruto's fight with Neji, every time I think I known his limits he surprises me, and goes beyond what anyone expected.
The next time I noticed him? It was when Sasuke told me that he had risked his life, shown power we never would have guessed he possessed, to save me, not Sasuke, not the village, though I'm sure he was fighting for them as well, but me. I didn't know what to think, he was doing what I always wanted Sasuke would in a way I don't think he could and yet I never gave him anything in return, I fought with him, turned him down, gave him every reason to go away and yet he keeps coming back to me, what kind of person does that? What kind of strength does that take?
And so here I am, having realized for the first time how much Naruto cares, finally realizing that he just may be the person that understands me, understand how much I hurt from Sasuke and how I deal with it, and yet... he's doing this for me, yes I know Sasuke is his friend, maybe best friend and the only one who can bring him back. They will fight, with nothing to hold them back, but no matter how strong Sasuke thinks he is, Naruto will win, he wants it more, because Sasuke is his friend, because he's on a mission for his village, because he made a promise, because of me... and now the tears come harder, faster, I don't' deserve his love, I don't even know if I can return it but I don't know if I could stand to lose it, I still love Sasuke, it's hard to let go of something I've had for so long even if more and more I know he will never see me as more then a friend, a teammate, as family but never as a wife, a lover, precious yes, cherished yes but never how I want or needed. All I ever wanted was to be loved by Sasuke but now more and more, I want to continue to be cherished by Naruto, to know that I'm still the center of his universe.
I guess that makes me
selfish... but I don't care, they both need to come back, so I can
figure this out, so I can learn who I really love, who really loves
me.... Sigh I know the answer so why do I fight so hard? Is it because
I don't want to think the years I spent were wasted, because I don't
want to acknowledge I truly hurt the one person who loves me above all
others? I don't know and all I can do is sit here and cry until they
come back to me. They need to come back to me, I can't live without
either of them.
My precious people.
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wow, that didn't go quite how I thought it would... I love
Naruto/Sakura, I think the manga is pushing to puting them together and
their doesn't seem to be many Fanfics that like that couple so this is
my addition to the ranks, hope you guys enjoyed it,
background music for the writing was SR-71: My world